Divorce after 1 year of marriage

[kennym 275]

Thank you.

I assure anyone who reads this I am done after this ordeal. No more. I don't wish this on anyone.

Khomer1964

I can really Identify with what you are going through.. Our timelines is the same as far is when our wives arrived.. And our situation sounds Identical.. I will add in my situation, is my wife is 18 years younger than me, so there is a maturity aspect..

In my case, Not sure what happened exactly. seems like I just could have been a dumb@$$.. my wife has some really good friends.. They were eager to share with me her behaivior when she travelled back to her home country with photos of her other boyfriends... So, it's the big "D" for me too..

I have been strugling to understand our situation and how I could have been sooo stupid.. We spent 4 years together before getting married... 3 years before starting the Visa.. and I knew her entire family.. I loved her family and I can honestly say they were all very close and dear to me and I am sure they felt the same way for me.. I know there were some red-flags that I stupidly overlooked like the lack of affection even early on and I was able to contribute that to possible cultural diferences (like a dumb@ss)..

It's awful easy to say "there's two sides" like my buddy skiptex, but the truth is; a relationship needs to work for both sides and not just for one.. soo I can understand.. I am hurting.. and even though skiptex thinks it's hilarious, I am a already considering taking another trip back to Colombia and visit some of the many friends I have there and who knows, I would love to meet someone again.. I beleive there are good, sincere people there or anyplace; it just seems we have to be honest with ourselfs about the dynamics of anyone relationship we enter into... the fundamental stuff regarding affection and interaction between to partners in a relationship is the same and can't let your "gut feelings" go un-answered...

In my case, my wife (soon-to-be ex) is back in Colombia.. And she's basically abbandoned her residency status at this point since shes been out of the US for more than 180 days in tha past year..

In my mind; I loved the person I met 5 years ago; but the person I was married to in past year is not the same person.. They seemed almost like entirely diferent people.. I also have prrof that the marriage was not in-good-faith with photos that shows she was unfaithful on her first trip back to Colombia..

There can be 2,3, or million sides to the story and for skiptex's benefit, it doesnt matter.. when your wife becomes unreasonable, and un-willing to work at the relationship, and it stops working for both parties, then it really doesnt make a diference.. It's time to move-on...

[GnBnL 50]

Then why did you allow yourself to get rushed into the marriage?

The only way out from under the affidavit of support would be for you to prove that she actively committed fraud.

You say the she didn't enter the marriage in good faith but in order to get her Status Adjusted she had to prove just that with your help!

agreed. Its not as though you married her against your will. Might need some time to cool down a bit before launching into the blame stuff. It is very difficult to adjust to all the changes of a new surrounding and without support it can put tons of strain on your relationship. I wish you the best of luck.

[Love's JAA 100]

Okay....

She does not want me to spend money on anything, ANYTHING! we live in Florida but it gets colder in the winter, so you DO need heat. She never turns the heat on anyway, but i paid to have it repaired because of the dangers (Pipes freezing, health issues, etc) and she was upset that i WASTED MONEY when i could just walk around the house in a winter coat. Yet, she will spends hundreds of dollars on eye cream and make-up and not blink an eye! If i buy anything, she has something to say. I work, she doesn't.

She doesn't respect my parents, she doesn't respect my friends, she doesn't respect my holiday's, everything is stupid to her. But , i must respect her holidays, which i always do. She won't make friends, she doesn't even talk to Chinese people when we go to the Chinese market! She asks me to talk to them! i speak like to words of Mandarin! LOL. I know you are trying to help and don't think i don't appreciate it, because i do, But she is not like your ordinary Asian women. She has been married before. She is very independent. She wants to do her own thing, but have a husband to support her. i know this kind. i dated a lot of America women that act exactly like that.

There is A LOT more that i will not bore you with, but this marriage is irreparable. I have tried everything to help her adjust. I thought she was homesick, so i spent a few thousand dollars that i didn't have to send her home for a month, but she doesn't appreciate anything. The best thing at this point is for her to find someone who can tolerate her. My family and friends have had it with her. I just want out at this point

From what you described, I was married to that woman for 12 years, also from China. Everything you described! Mine got her green card already from her prior marriage, but she got me to file the affidavit of support so her mother could come here. So now I am on the hook for that. my question is, when does LPR end, since my mother-in-law went back to China two years ago and hasn't returned. Is there any way to determine if her residency lapsed or something?

Oh yeah, so from what it sounds like, don't wait 12 years to end the marriage like I did.

[Robert&Karen 264]

If you can prove she entered the marriage with ulterior motives you may qualify for an annulment. You have to check your regulations to see so. I don't know if this will eliminate the I-864 responsibilities, but it will for sure put some space between you two.

So sorry it did not work out.

[mjkj 14]

Okay....

She does not want me to spend money on anything, ANYTHING! we live in Florida but it gets colder in the winter, so you DO need heat. She never turns the heat on anyway, but i paid to have it repaired because of the dangers (Pipes freezing, health issues, etc) and she was upset that i WASTED MONEY when i could just walk around the house in a winter coat. Yet, she will spends hundreds of dollars on eye cream and make-up and not blink an eye! If i buy anything, she has something to say. I work, she doesn't.

She doesn't respect my parents, she doesn't respect my friends, she doesn't respect my holiday's, everything is stupid to her. But , i must respect her holidays, which i always do. She won't make friends, she doesn't even talk to Chinese people when we go to the Chinese market! She asks me to talk to them! i speak like to words of Mandarin! LOL. I know you are trying to help and don't think i don't appreciate it, because i do, But she is not like your ordinary Asian women. She has been married before. She is very independent. She wants to do her own thing, but have a husband to support her. i know this kind. i dated a lot of America women that act exactly like that.

There is A LOT more that i will not bore you with, but this marriage is irreparable. I have tried everything to help her adjust. I thought she was homesick, so i spent a few thousand dollars that i didn't have to send her home for a month, but she doesn't appreciate anything. The best thing at this point is for her to find someone who can tolerate her. My family and friends have had it with her. I just want out at this point

Have you try Marriage counselling yet?, and if it doesn't work, get a federal lawyer they knows everything.

[mjkj 14]

Okay....

She does not want me to spend money on anything, ANYTHING! we live in Florida but it gets colder in the winter, so you DO need heat. She never turns the heat on anyway, but i paid to have it repaired because of the dangers (Pipes freezing, health issues, etc) and she was upset that i WASTED MONEY when i could just walk around the house in a winter coat. Yet, she will spends hundreds of dollars on eye cream and make-up and not blink an eye! If i buy anything, she has something to say. I work, she doesn't.

She doesn't respect my parents, she doesn't respect my friends, she doesn't respect my holiday's, everything is stupid to her. But , i must respect her holidays, which i always do. She won't make friends, she doesn't even talk to Chinese people when we go to the Chinese market! She asks me to talk to them! i speak like to words of Mandarin! LOL. I know you are trying to help and don't think i don't appreciate it, because i do, But she is not like your ordinary Asian women. She has been married before. She is very independent. She wants to do her own thing, but have a husband to support her. i know this kind. i dated a lot of America women that act exactly like that.

There is A LOT more that i will not bore you with, but this marriage is irreparable. I have tried everything to help her adjust. I thought she was homesick, so i spent a few thousand dollars that i didn't have to send her home for a month, but she doesn't appreciate anything. The best thing at this point is for her to find someone who can tolerate her. My family and friends have had it with her. I just want out at this point

[mjkj 14]

I mean get family lawyer not federal:)

[skiptex 225]

It's awful easy to say "there's two sides" like my buddy skiptex, but the truth is; a relationship needs to work for both sides and not just for one.. exactly, just like you said.. both sides not one.. HENCE, two sides of story..

soo I can understand.. I am hurting.. and even though skiptex thinks it's hilarious *read again, his term of DOMESTICS, was Hilarious.. *,

I am a already considering taking another trip back to Colombia and visit some of the many friends I have there and who knows, I would love to meet someone again.. I beleive there are good, sincere people there or anyplace; it just seems we have to be honest with ourselfs about the dynamics of anyone relationship we enter into... the fundamental stuff regarding affection and interaction between to partners in a relationship is the same and can't let your "gut feelings" go un-answered...

There can be 2,3, or million sides to the story and for skiptex's benefit, it doesnt matter.. when your wife becomes unreasonable, and un-willing to work at the relationship, and it stops working for both parties, then it really doesnt make a diference.. It's time to move-on... don't know why you are calling me out but ok.. whateve.. look is sucks, you made a bad choice, you are dealing with it.. hope it works out for you in Colombia..

[m&her 0]

Try to work things out, It is very hard to adjust to other country and a diferent culture. She can be legally until her green card expire, after that she will need to renew it.

Under 3 conditions that you can find in the I-751 instructions.

Hope that you solve your problem

[yimmy 0]

hey man get a lawyer , and talk about all this to them to get out of your life this crazy chinese woman ,, have the pans in your house don't leave her have that in your home!!!!

[kennym 275]

Hey

Simply picking on you since we're fellow texans.. You know how we roll...

[DeeDee&Sam 68]

im a money saver myself, i had horrible fights with my husband, i had problems with his family, i was impossible to handle with and i STILL AM. and he understood me (well most of the time) and he didnt want to divorce me cause he knew its hard for me to adjust. YOU are seeing just one side and i think you DONT LOVE HER and you never did. divorce her, but for her own good, not for yours

[William Lee 1]

She has a few friends who have married Americans and have just left after a few months to go back to China. We have only been married a little over a year. Things have been shaky from day one. I don't want to be her legal sponsor anymore because she is fraudulent.

Surprised that her few friends left after a few months to go back to China. Those that are fraudulent usually want money, a divorce, and to stay in the USA. Her friends going back to China is unusual.

I think you spent too little time with her before she came over to the USA. How many times did you visited her and how long were the visits ? This is not the first story I have heard about a marriage having trouble from day one coming to the USA.

Cam ypu tell me what is her age and your age ?

It sounds like you two don't have a common language. Your Chinese is bad, and her English is bad. I wonder how did you two get passed US immigration.

Edited January 24, 2012 by William Lee

[Deputy Purple 1,294]

my question is, when does LPR end, since my mother-in-law went back to China two years ago and hasn't returned. Is there any way to determine if her residency lapsed or something?

You really should ask your question in a new thread so you don't risk derailing this one...

If she's been out of the country for 2 years then she'll need to obtain a SB-1 (Returning LPR) Visa to re-enter. For this she'll need to convince the CO that some unplanned circumstance(s) caused her to be out of the US for so long and she absolutely couldn't return before now (when she's applying).

Edited January 24, 2012 by Bob 4 Anna

[skiptex 225]

Hey

Simply picking on you since we're fellow texans.. You know how we roll...

we are feisty ain't we..