No children allowed wedding, how do you tackle this?

[Susita 175]

We are planning to use this site to customize each one individually with a name

http://www.says-it.com/concertticket/

Each person will have one and we plan to make it very clear that no ticket means no entry. I am hoping that the subliminal message of this looking official will help. Plus, it might be a cool souvineer for some of them.

Cool!!

I don't know if you can publicly (on FB or emails) start sending videos of unsupervised kids at weddings causing problems and lament about it. Example: "Oh no! I met this lady and I an terrified of any kids at my wedding after seeing this. It was her favorite niece and is always so well behaved. The stress just got to her!"

Of course, some people CAN'T figure out a hint. It might be worth a shot.

I wouldn't go posting videos, that's pretty offensive (I have 3 kids), and most of that is just kids being kids. But anyway, I'm sort of intelligent and if my kids' names weren't on the invitation or it didn't say "& family" I'd get the hint!! Plus, how can I have fun if I'm chasing after 3 kids?

[EminTX 131]

I'd get the hint!!

Obviously you have a brain. Unfortunately, not everyone does.

Seriously, the person I am most worried about, once had a trip planned to Dallas from Amarillo. The apartment they were staying in, was a one bedroom of office workers who would be continuing to work each day of the visit. The traveler and her family (2 kids, one husband) showed up with....

ducks.

Yes. Honestly. She couldn't imagine why the apartment dwellers were upset.

She also once took pets rabbits to Six Flags, gifted a very pregnant woman in the airport with two huge plants to carry on board with her (pre 9/11), showed up at my house around 3am from Florida during finals week, invited my family to stay with hers for a planned trip but didn't show up back home for the first day of the trip so we were stuck waiting outside her home in the country, etc. I love her, but there is no "hinting" going on in that part of the family.

I am tempted to serve duck and hasenpfeffer at the wedding.

[NY_BX 397]

Obviously you have a brain. Unfortunately, not everyone does.

Seriously, the person I am most worried about, once had a trip planned to Dallas from Amarillo. The apartment they were staying in, was a one bedroom of office workers who would be continuing to work each day of the visit. The traveler and her family (2 kids, one husband) showed up with....

ducks.

Yes. Honestly. She couldn't imagine why the apartment dwellers were upset.

She also once took pets rabbits to Six Flags, gifted a very pregnant woman in the airport with two huge plants to carry on board with her (pre 9/11), showed up at my house around 3am from Florida during finals week, invited my family to stay with hers for a planned trip but didn't show up back home for the first day of the trip so we were stuck waiting outside her home in the country, etc. I love her, but there is no "hinting" going on in that part of the family.

I am tempted to serve duck and hasenpfeffer at the wedding.

OMG! I'd write a short screenplay!

[jojolicious 38]

Ducks? Well for that particular person you need to have a very blunt conversation with her regardless of how the invitation is worded

[NY_BX 397]

Ducks? Well for that particular person you need to have a very blunt conversation with her regardless of how the invitation is worded

LMFAO! I swear this sounds like a sequeal of National Lampoons Vacation... the wedding!

[Susita 175]

Obviously you have a brain. Unfortunately, not everyone does.

Seriously, the person I am most worried about, once had a trip planned to Dallas from Amarillo. The apartment they were staying in, was a one bedroom of office workers who would be continuing to work each day of the visit. The traveler and her family (2 kids, one husband) showed up with....

ducks.

Yes. Honestly. She couldn't imagine why the apartment dwellers were upset.

She also once took pets rabbits to Six Flags, gifted a very pregnant woman in the airport with two huge plants to carry on board with her (pre 9/11), showed up at my house around 3am from Florida during finals week, invited my family to stay with hers for a planned trip but didn't show up back home for the first day of the trip so we were stuck waiting outside her home in the country, etc. I love her, but there is no "hinting" going on in that part of the family.

I am tempted to serve duck and hasenpfeffer at the wedding.

I assume you are related to this person? Otherwise, why would you invite her to your wedding? For entertainment purposes

[Kajikit 65]

Doesn't sound like my sort of fun... but it's your wedding so you get to make the rules. If you told me 'No children' I'd assume it meant nobody under the age of 12-14, and it didn't apply to older teens. If you really don't want them there, you have to be point-blank about it. 'NOBODY UNDER 21 WILL BE ADMITTED' - and then you have to check IDs at the door, because there isn't really much difference between 17 and 21. Do you really want that much hassle for your celebration?

My aunt's wedding was 'no children' (she said it was because there was a large fountain in the reception hall and it wasn't 'safe') and she extended that to not inviting ANY of her neices and nephews, including me who was only five years younger than her and 25! I was pretty POed about that because once upon a time we were close... making rules about who's allowed to come to weddings tends to PO people, so you have to be ready for the fallout from whatever choices you make.

[david'sgirl 134]

I've been to several weddings which were adult only. The bride and groom should not feel obligated to fork over money to feed an entire family or be required to pay for child care for guests who have children. I once had to leave a reception early to go nurse my baby but I would not have even considered bringing her. I would think most people would not jump to the conclusion that you must have forgot to list little ####### and Jane on the invitation but just to be safe I would add no one under 21 will be admitted or adults only or something to that effect if you think your guests need it spelled out. I've heard horror stories about people bringing uninvited guests to parties and weddings. If you get an invitation addressed to you and guest it is assumed you will bring a date. If it is to just you then you are expected to attend alone. For couples if it says Mr & Mrs Blah Blah then the little Blah Blahs are not invited.

I hope it all works out for you. Maybe you could just elope!

Obviously you have a brain. Unfortunately, not everyone does.

Seriously, the person I am most worried about, once had a trip planned to Dallas from Amarillo. The apartment they were staying in, was a one bedroom of office workers who would be continuing to work each day of the visit. The traveler and her family (2 kids, one husband) showed up with....

ducks.

Yes. Honestly. She couldn't imagine why the apartment dwellers were upset.

She also once took pets rabbits to Six Flags, gifted a very pregnant woman in the airport with two huge plants to carry on board with her (pre 9/11), showed up at my house around 3am from Florida during finals week, invited my family to stay with hers for a planned trip but didn't show up back home for the first day of the trip so we were stuck waiting outside her home in the country, etc. I love her, but there is no "hinting" going on in that part of the family.

I am tempted to serve duck and hasenpfeffer at the wedding.

Wow. a book is definitely in order! lol

[EminTX 131]

If you can manage to go to work (or a casino) for a day without your kids (or ducks), then you can also attend a party without your kids. And yes, a wedding is a party.

Considering the cost and the lack of discipline amongst our culture now, this is an absolutely legit concern. For us, we are planning to have it in a state park in a pavillion with a playground within 50 steps so that the kids can go wear out their energy.

The family member is someone who, because of her inclinations, is often left out of family events and occasions. She is a hard-luck kind of person and, even though she has the best of intentions, she is absolutely her own worst enemy. I love her anyway. If she causes a ruckus, I have someone already designated to be the bully and straighten her out. This "bouncer" is someone that she doesn't know so she can be as angry at that person as she wants while we, the couple, hopefully don't have to waste any part of our special (and stressful enough) day on that silliness.

Besides, if my beloved fiance can't deal with the crazies in my family, how can he expect me to deal with crazies in his?

And about the book idea...I was actually looking at that. It is super easy now to self-publish with the availability of e-books.

Edited January 15, 2012 by EminTX