Fiancee left me after 3 weeks

[joonphon 7]

sorry to hear that.... i guess when you're in love, you don't really see their true color.. all these advices above are good...

[Leatherneck 693]

Would she be able to marry another man and stay here within the 90 days? Or is the fiancee visa only allow her to marry me? I am worried maybe those numbers she was calling was another guy she online or something.

It seems she used 2000 minutes of talk time in 2 weeks and was on the internet constantly according to my extremely high cell phone bill.

No, she can only marry you, no way can she marry another man then adjust her status. She is hosed unless you marry her.

Like I said OP, she was planning this long ago, even before she arrived at her POE, you can take that to the bank!

[marklovetina 52]

My heart is broke.

My fiancee arrived the Nov. 15th. I have been the happiest guy in the world with my fiancee until I got home from work today and found out she was gone. No message, no communication, her luggage is gone.

She seemed very happy here. We did lots of shopping, eating out, got a christmas tree in the forest, hockey games, cooking together..... I thought we were very happy as far as I knew. We had a great evening together last night, she seemed more romantic then ever and I went to work this morning like normal. She was talking to me via phone messages all day as usual.

Her phone is shut off now from the moment I arrived home from work. I tried to send her an email and it was rejected.

I do not know where she is. She does not know any people around my city. I found out through my phone bill she has been talking to people in 3 other states a lot for days so I assume she is in one of those states becuase she did not know anyone here.

I can not believe this has happened to me. I treated her like a princess always. I do not understand why women use men. I have known her for 2 years and we talked every day. How can women be so heartless to just leave and not say anything? I put 100's of hours into helping her get her visa and paid for everything. And she leaves me without any conversation at all?

I am confused as to what to do? Report her missing? Call the numbers she was calling? I don't think they will tell me anything she must have beening organizing with them to leave.

sorry to hear about that.... but atleast u discovered her true color already....

[jojolicious 38]

I'm so sorry to hear about your situation. The previous posters have given you good advice.

It's so easy for persons to hide their true nature when in a LDR albeit 2 years which is certainly a long time. The positive side to this is that you didn't reach to the marriage or AOS stage yet so you avoided additional expenses and the dreaded Affidavit of Support.

Right now, I can only imagine how heartbroken and confused you are. Just take some time to clear your head and proceed to protect yourself from any further possible financial and/or emotional damage by taking the advice you've been given.

I wish you all the best.

[Touch of Treble 39]

So Sad for you...But please let us know that you have protected yourself with the excellent advise above...we are worried for your safety.

[issha2lynden 77]

Wow. I'm REALLY sorry that this has happened to you, but before taking time to feel sadness, you NEED to PROTECT yourelf.

1) If she has an ATM card to your account - shut it down.

2) If she has passwords to any of your bank acounts, email accounts, ANY acount - change them immediately.

3) Send a letter ASAP to USCIS and notify them of the course of events. This will protect you against her saying you were abusive. She can not apply for VAWA but she can allege abuse and you'd have a diffiult time to ever petition someone else if you decided to.

4) Change the locks on your doorss. She has abandoned the premises but if she decided to return tonight and just enter your place you'd be powerless to do anything about it.

5) Do NOT be alone with this woman if she contacts you. You could be set up for a potential abuse allegation.

I am so sorry that this has happened, but it could have been worse. You could have married this woman and thing could have become very difficult for you. Time heals - believe me when I say this but for now concentrate on protecting yourself.

Goiod luck.

Excellent advice

I am sorry this darkness has come to you. Be strong and courageous. You are not a failure. A failure is when one won't get up. So

TROD ONTO THE STRAIGHT PATH WITH VIGOR, VERVE AND BRAVADO, all of us time to time will encounter these kind of people. Have wisdom. Fight with a good fight by doing what is just right but don't lose a good heart. God bless you brother.

Edited December 10, 2011 by issha

[Hank_ 9,174]

For sure follow AZ's advice!! CYA!!!!!!!!!!!!!

1) If she has an ATM card to your account - shut it down.

2) If she has passwords to any of your bank acounts, email accounts, ANY acount - change them immediately.

3) Send a letter ASAP to USCIS and notify them of the course of events. This will protect you against her saying you were abusive. She can not apply for VAWA but she can allege abuse and you'd have a diffiult time to ever petition someone else if you decided to.

4) Change the locks on your doorss. She has abandoned the premises but if she decided to return tonight and just enter your place you'd be powerless to do anything about it.

5) Do NOT be alone with this woman if she contacts you. You could be set up for a potential abuse allegation.

I am so sorry that this has happened, but it could have been worse. You could have married this woman and thing could have become very difficult for you. Time heals - believe me when I say this but for now concentrate on protecting yourself.

At a minimim - You can change the pin number on your DEBIT card at your bank in a few minutes, I have done this; they have a machine they have you enter the new number into then swipe the card and done. But I would request new ones as they work like CCs also.

For CCs I would just request new ones, that way the old CC is dead and within a week you have a new card.

For sure change the locks, a quick trip to Home Depot or Lowes.

This all makes my gut very tight.... very sorry for what has happened.

Edited December 10, 2011 by Hank_Amy

[Liz Alvarado 3]

I feel what happened, I can think that she was planning to leave his country and reconnect with someone who can think more the way she ran away from home, it's a shame to know how some women do not think a future in a home with people who truly loves her go very bad for his disappointment: (, really sorry and time heals all wounds and often what happens is the best friend, God is good and merciful things allows a purpose surely she could be very bad in the future!

good luck

My heart is broke.

My fiancee arrived the Nov. 15th. I have been the happiest guy in the world with my fiancee until I got home from work today and found out she was gone. No message, no communication, her luggage is gone.

She seemed very happy here. We did lots of shopping, eating out, got a christmas tree in the forest, hockey games, cooking together..... I thought we were very happy as far as I knew. We had a great evening together last night, she seemed more romantic then ever and I went to work this morning like normal. She was talking to me via phone messages all day as usual.

Her phone is shut off now from the moment I arrived home from work. I tried to send her an email and it was rejected.

I do not know where she is. She does not know any people around my city. I found out through my phone bill she has been talking to people in 3 other states a lot for days so I assume she is in one of those states becuase she did not know anyone here.

I can not believe this has happened to me. I treated her like a princess always. I do not understand why women use men. I have known her for 2 years and we talked every day. How can women be so heartless to just leave and not say anything? I put 100's of hours into helping her get her visa and paid for everything. And she leaves me without any conversation at all?

I am confused as to what to do? Report her missing? Call the numbers she was calling? I don't think they will tell me anything she must have beening organizing with them to leave.

[Richie Rich 70]

Maybe you wait a few days and see what plays out . Maybe she is just visiting relatives or friends . If it is true and she is gone for real , then take the advise of the previous posts . Be thankful that she left at this stage of the relationship and not after things get more complicated and she takes half of your estate. I feel for you . Hang in there and be strong .

[Hank_ 9,174]

Wait ? Good grief!!

1) Huge phone bills

2) All her clothes & bags are gone

3) No note or message

4) messages are blocked

5).... heck don't need 5

[NoneYa 73]

Maybe she's just visiting a boyfriend she didn't tell you about

[Liz Alvarado 3]

that's right!!

You do not deserve to wait no chance if everything was coldly calculated :angry:

Wait ? Good grief!!

1) Huge phone bills

2) All her clothes & bags are gone

3) No note or message

4) messages are blocked

5).... heck don't need 5

[issha2lynden 77]

Maybe you wait a few days and see what plays out . Maybe she is just visiting relatives or friends . If it is true and she is gone for real , then take the advise of the previous posts . Be thankful that she left at this stage of the relationship and not after things get more complicated and she takes half of your estate. I feel for you . Hang in there and be strong .

I strongly don't think so! if OP was true to his statements;

1) Huge phone bills

2) All her clothes & bags are gone

3) No note or message

4) messages are blocked

It all points out to RUN AWAY

[Girl from Celebes 588]

Green Card Seeker. Sorry for you OP.

[sheepp 2]

I am very sorry to hear that, regretably this kind of people exists and nobody deserves something like this happening in their lives, I cant imagine how are you feeling after you thought you have got the dream of the happy life... but you know what, people here are right, and its so good that she left now and not after marry you, you dont have any tie with this woman after the 90 days, and this sets you free to have the opportunity to find the right woman at the right time. I wish you good luck and dont give up, don´t think all women are like that, unfortunately this was, but I am sure you will find a good girl, just be aware of the little details, those things that when we are in love we dont see or dont think its a big deal... follow AZ advice and please, protect yourself, its enough what she already have done to you, don´t let her take advantage of you in any way!