Does it feel like you had to "buy" your Spouse ?

[Trompe le Monde 1,107]

Certainly not when you have something that money can't buy.

[Captain Oates 911]

One day we must all pay for everything

[I AM NOT THAT GUY 5,715]

One day we must all pay for everything

[Captain Oates 911]

Women are like cats - they go where it's warm

If you don't feed your cat, it will leave you

When I lost my big job I was unemployed for a year

My g/f was a blonde hairdresser - you know the type- I asked her if she wanted a beer and she said she wanted a gin and tonic - in fact make it a double

She knew I was living on my savings

She saw my face and said "If you can't afford a girlfriend, then you shouldn't have one"

She started 2 timing me with a manager who had a good job and a nice car and we broke up

Then I got a job and he lost his

sweet revenge!

I think that answers the question about whether we buy our women

I met my wife om match.com and I told her I was 10 years older than I am in order to attract gold diggers

[Deputy Purple 1,294]

It does make more sense for the beneficiary to be responsible for the visa expenses, they are after all the person that 'benefits'. (which he is! contributing at least)

I guess this makes sense when the beneficiary is able to but just like it's not uncommon for one member of a relationship (or their family) to be the primary provider of a local couple's wedding expenses I'd say you have to keep it in context with each relationship.

Before they arrived here Anna wouldn't have been able to care for Gabby, work full time and contribute substantially towards the expense of the process. It just made more sense for her to stay home with Gabby (who is deaf) while I covered everything.

Now she's working full-time and contributes substantially to the household so in my mind it's just fine...

[Susita 175]

Being that my husband & I both shelled out a ton of money during the process... No. It doesn't feel like I bought him.

[MrsP2010 20]

I feel like I bought one hell of an experience, that's for sure. But I was already in too deep to not have forever with him, long before we started thinking about immigration stuff.

[EminTX 131]

I like to think of it as a bribe to the US government to let me live with my husband in my own country

This is the best summary of this topic that I have ever seen.

I am really too broke to be buying husbands or to be a sugar mama.

And about the age thing, I have always dated older men. There have only been two in the 25 years of my dating experiences that any were younger at all. Most had at minimum of 10 years older than me. I never got any jabbing about it. The one time that I dated someone 10 years younger than me, I got so much grief that it was a daily thing. (My supervisor in my job put a picture of a baby in sunglasses on the front of my work folder with this caption, "I like older babes!" ) The age thing was a big issue for me with him. I couldn't stand the "music" he inflicted on me!

While it is not atypical for women in the US to date men their age or younger, it is still much more acceptable to be with someone older. (My fiance is 4 years younger and a couple of US-born-and-raised women have asked me if that will be a problem. Seriously. I am 40. Bwah ha ha ha ha. I respond that it would have been a problem when I was 17 and leave it at that.)

For people who have enough disposable income that this is not a hardship, then "good for you"! For the rest of us where we do have to budget this, while it is not overwhelming, I am working overtime and eating more "beans and rice and rice and beans" to accomodate unexpected expenses without dipping into emergency savings. I know I am not alone in this.

[Bad_Daddy 2,209]

Women are like cats - they go where it's warm

If you don't feed your cat, it will leave you

When I lost my big job I was unemployed for a year

My g/f was a blonde hairdresser - you know the type- I asked her if she wanted a beer and she said she wanted a gin and tonic - in fact make it a double

She knew I was living on my savings

She saw my face and said "If you can't afford a girlfriend, then you shouldn't have one"

She started 2 timing me with a manager who had a good job and a nice car and we broke up

Then I got a job and he lost his

sweet revenge!

I think that answers the question about whether we buy our women

I met my wife om match.com and I told her I was 10 years older than I am in order to attract gold diggers

That about sums it up.

[Susita 175]

For the rest of us where we do have to budget this, while it is not overwhelming, I am working overtime and eating more "beans and rice and rice and beans" to accomodate unexpected expenses without dipping into emergency savings. I know I am not alone in this.

Nope, you're not! I eat rice & beans everyday anyway, but it was financially rough.

[EminTX 131]

Sorry, the "beans and rice and rice and beans" is a Dave Ramsey reference. It is one of the things he always preaches to focus on when cutting your expenses. Eating out or eating expensive it not necessary.

When my better half gets here, that is one of the first things we will do together is take the Financial Peace class in Spanish so that he can bette understand money here in the US.

[Susita 175]

When my better half gets here, that is one of the first things we will do together is take the Financial Peace class in Spanish so that he can bette understand money here in the US.

Don't rush on that... the hubs was always a cash guy in Peru, just switching to paying with a debit card, writing checks, etc. was a big deal for him. We don't realize how complicated stuff actually is when we have done it our entire lives. The simple stuff, like pumping your own gas (yep, they don't do that there)... or paying your bills online was totally foreign to him. You don't think about all this stuff when you move to a new place.

I would say in about a year try the Dave Ramsey class... LOL. I actually found that my husband made me a better money minded person than any financial class could have.

[TBoneTX 45,273]

As reported elsewhere:

A few weeks ago, Mrs. T-B. announced, "I bought you cheap."

I said, "What?"

"I bought you cheap!"

"You did WHAT?"

"Cheap, CHEAP! I bought you CHEAP!"

Upon further investigation, it turned out that Mrs. T-B. had been to the supermarket and bought me a bag of potato cheaps, si man.

I bought her cheap.

At the supermarket, tonight. However, I kidnapped the bag and have already eaten most of the cheaps, si man.

[Bad_Daddy 2,209]

I bought her cheap.

At the supermarket, tonight. However, I kidnapped the bag and have already eaten most of the cheaps, si man.

Good thinking Tbone...you don't want to over feed her.

[TBoneTX 45,273]

Good thinking Tbone...you don't want to over feed her.

Oh, she doesn't need my help for that, no man.