Filipino Attitudes

[CMAGR8DX 0]

All my relatives, friends, and even former teachers who live or have lived abroad say the same thing. Filipinos, who are already quite superficial and arrogant when they're here, become even more superficial and arrogant when they step on foreign soil. My friends, whether they're in Australia, Holland, the UAE, or the US, tell me one of the things they've observed is that the reason Filipinos invite other Filipinos to gatherings is so they can show off. Fellow Filipino immigrants have asked them questions along the lines of, "I've bought this and this. What about you? What have you bought?" I'm proud of my friends because they seem pretty grounded. They now refuse to attend events hosted by Filipinos because they refuse to compete.

I see evidence of this need to show off on Facebook. An acquaintance goes to a Western country, buys a Louis Vuitton or an Hermes soon after he/she starts working, and posts pictures of the acquisition on FB. My Holland-based friend tells me about a Filipina acquaintance in Amsterdam who cleans floors for the purpose of acquiring enough money to buy an Hermes bag. I find it both interesting and embarrassing. But to each her own, right? If one's sole purpose in life is to buy an Hermes, then let her buy her Hermes, I guess. This need doesn't appear to be exclusive to Filipinos, though. It seems common among people from third-world countries that were colonized by Spain.

I bet the bags are knock offs...

[I AM NOT THAT GUY 5,715]

maybe she should drive sometimes, so you can drink

We tried that. She don't get to drive for a while. I haven't replaced the last car yet.

[Bad_Daddy 2,209]

We tried that. She don't get to drive for a while. I haven't replaced the last car yet.

[CMAGR8DX 0]

We tried that. She don't get to drive for a while. I haven't replaced the last car yet.

[one...two...tree 2,762]

I'm an American citizen by birth, but my parents are both Filipino, who immigrated to the U.S. many years ago. I'm fully aware of all the opportunities and privileges I've had growing up in this great country. My parents have always been humble and in turn, have also instilled in me humility, gratitude, and appreciation for those who struggle to make a better life for themselves and their family by experiencing first hand what my parents have gone through.

I love my Filipino culture and I've been to the Philippines many times throughout my life and lived there for 4 years. But there's one thing I've noticed that really bothers me… Why is it that after Filipinos immigrate to the U.S. and finally come back home to the Philippines… their attitudes change, and act like they're so much better than everyone? I'm not saying all Filipinos… but in my experience, I've noticed that many "americanized filipinos" come back with this arrogant, sometimes pompous, attitude like they are above everyone.

I'm curious to what others may think... Any thoughts?

Can you give an example?

[jen1217 5]

well my hubby been in the US for almost 40 years and came back here 1988 for short visit bec of US airforce base in Clark during that time and came back again after a long time to meet me and marry me last year but to my surprised he can still speak tagalog very well and no attitude of being "MAYABANG" or pretend that he can't speak his own language anymore he always telling me that living in the US never changed his attitude and being true blooded Filipino and he hates that attitude by some Filipinos living or been there in the US.

[Crashed~N2~Me 970]

I see evidence of this need to show off on Facebook.

Facebook is a social networking service and website. It's all about chika and tsismis. The ability to "show off" is one of it's best aspects..and ...what's wrong with people "showing off"? Is that (always) a bad thing to do?

I get it...some people can use .."showing off" as a way to belittle another. To make oneself look better and the other to be ...less.

(but) Here are a few examples of "showing off" (that I have witnessed)...

E posted pics / vids of her son almost daily (after he was born). I would sometimes ask my wife...So what's J (the son) up to today? In fact, I think I know all the husbands and childrens names because of the regular "showing off" my wife's friends have been busy doing on FB. (lot's of beautiful families )

D & R both posted pics of their husband's pinning and promotion. (Congratulations! )

B posted pics of their trips to New orleans, Florida and Vegas. (Looked like good times )

Others posted pics of V-day/B-day/Xmas and anniv presents they received. The cars they drive. The jewelry they wear. The resto/food they eat. (OMG! so much "showing off"! )

Lately...there is a group (of my wife's friends) that have taken up couponing. They post pictures (on FB) of purchased items and list the amount of $ saved using coupons. A few have demonstrated ("showed off") their success at achieving deep discounts. ( Kudos! and...where's my Sunday paper? )

Hmmmm.. ...I suppose you might think this "showing off" is "interesting and "embarrassing"...too?

It is human nature to be sociable. To like and be liked in return. To "showoff" to friends and family hoping to hear "way to go!" or some other nice compliment.

Jealousy is a sneaky green demon. Jealousy can make unreasonable thinking justified.

It is sometimes difficult to discern the difference between arrogance and bragging. (but) There is a difference.

I say...let the people "show off". I don't have the right to deprive another of their self esteem. and...I don't mind seeing / hearing another "show off". I like to hear about chika and tsismis (just like any other). I suppose I'm human too.

Edited December 3, 2011 by Crashed~N2~Me

[Tahoma 2,292]

Can you give an example?

*chirp*chirp*chirp*

[I AM NOT THAT GUY 5,715]

*chirp*chirp*chirp*

Well, there was the Filipina Draw Nurse/Technician at Kaiser that didn't want to listen to me on how to find my vein. "What? Are you trying to tell me how to do my job?"

After sticking both arms several times, and have one other patient pass out watching her digging around for five minutes in one arm with nary a drop produced, she gave up in a fluster and left the room. The Draw Nurse/Technician from another station came over, hit the vein first attempt, and bandaged up the mess.

[Tahoma 2,292]

Well, there was the Filipina Draw Nurse/Technician at Kaiser that didn't want to listen to me on how to find my vein. "What? Are you trying to tell me how to do my job?"

After sticking both arms several times, and have one other patient pass out watching her digging around for five minutes in one arm with nary a drop produced, she gave up in a fluster and left the room. The Draw Nurse/Technician from another station came over, hit the vein first attempt, and bandaged up the mess.

Well, that one example certainly proves that there are many arrogant. pompous Filipinos. It's a good thing that the incompetent nurse wasn't a 'Kana because I would have come to the conclusion that there are many arrogant, pompous Americans.

[I AM NOT THAT GUY 5,715]

Well, that one example certainly proves that there are many arrogant. pompous Filipinos. It's a good thing that the incompetent nurse wasn't a 'Kana because I would have come to the conclusion that there are many arrogant, pompous Americans.

One could be an exception, two might be a coincidence, but three would be a trend.

[CMAGR8DX 0]

Can you give an example?

when some people forget or refuse to associate with their "less fortunate" friends now that they have money.... just because others may be less fortunate, doesn't mean you should treat them with less respect.... especially when they were in the same boat not too long ago. They become what some people call "others".

I'm fully aware of the show off mentality that many pinoys have... to each his/her own... It just bother's me when their attitudes change towards their old friends and they have that "I'm better than you" attitude.

Edited December 3, 2011 by CMAGR8DX

[I AM NOT THAT GUY 5,715]

when some people forget or refuse to associate with their "less fortunate" friends now that they have money.... just because others may be less fortunate, doesn't mean you should treat them with less respect.... especially when they were in the same boat not too long ago. They become what some people call "others".

I'm fully aware of the show off mentality that many pinoys have... to each his/her own... It just bother's me when their attitudes change towards their old friends and they have that "I'm better than you" attitude.

It's a competition, even among friends, and it bothers my wife. That part is definitely Filipina. The nosiness thing and the gossip thing seems to be a female trait, taken to the extreme by the third world women. Even her Mexican coworkers ask way too many personal questions about us, how much we make, how big is our house, what is my job, blah blah blah. When I got married, I lost any semblance of privacy.

[rheanick 42]

It's a competition, even among friends, and it bothers my wife. That part is definitely Filipina. The nosiness thing and the gossip thing seems to be a female trait, taken to the extreme by the third world women. Even her Mexican coworkers ask way too many personal questions about us, how much we make, how big is our house, what is my job, blah blah blah. When I got married, I lost any semblance of privacy.

I met several filipinas like that, nosy, insecure.

Asking the price of my computer, our sofa, my watch, how many bedroom we have in our house. Since they are asking, i normally answer them the truth.

This is the funny part... if they know that you have more money that they are, they would think of something to insult you or your husband.

And i was like thinking... what the f#ck, insecure b#tch... Though i normally silently laugh at them.

Last step, scrap them out from my friend's list.

Edited December 3, 2011 by rheanick

[~happyndinlove~ 540]

I met several filipinas like that, nosy, insecure.

Asking the price of my computer, our sofa, my watch, how many bedroom we have in our house. Since they are asking, i normally answer them the truth.

This is the funny part... if they know that you have more money that they are, they would think of something to insult you or your husband.

And i was like thinking... what the f#ck, insecure b#tch... Though i normally silently laugh at them.

Last step, scrap them out from my friend's list.

LOL! I had the same experience with several Pinay I thought were my friends. I confronted 1 of the 3. I asked why they were treating me badly. She answered, "because they are jealous of you".

Before I arrived in America, my husband contacted the archdiocese and identified several Filipina "plugged in" to the local Filipino community. All of them warned my husband and I to watch out and be careful. One of the ladies even advised hubby ko to discourage me making friends with Filipinas. When we asked why, she answered "because most of them will make trouble with tsismis and back stabbing. She said that "most are crazy competitive and crazy jealous."

Filipino nga naman...

Edited December 4, 2011 by ~happyndinlove~