Getting married In Belarus

[ONA 133]

In Ukraine you can spend up to 90 days without the visa.

[Bad_Daddy 2,209]

In Ukraine you can spend up to 90 days without the visa.

Which is a big plus compared to Belarus. Then when your 90 days is up, you hop the border into Slovakia for a few hours then back into Ukraine and you get another 90 days. I wouldn't mind spending a few months in Ukraine during the summer months...if I was single that is.

[ONA 133]

Which is a big plus compared to Belarus. Then when your 90 days is up, you hop the border into Slovakia for a few hours then back into Ukraine and you get another 90 days. I wouldn't mind spending a few months in Ukraine during the summer months...if I was single that is.

Or you can go to Poland instead. Girls are pretty there too

[LvivLovers 39]

My wife and I were both looking for a GOOD relationship...someone that was marriage material. Elena's models happened to be the place we found each other. We emailed about a week, then added in talking on the phone through some really sh*tty phone cards (before I knew about Skype)...right on that first phone conversation things immediately clicked. So after about a month we really wanted to meet to see if we still felt the same way seeing each other in person. Now I had actually only been working at my job as a trader for about 5 months when I decided to take this 2 week vacation to Ukraine and I was already pretty nervous about asking my boss for that time off since I'd been there for such a short time. Thankfully he was really cool about it and said "Hey! I won't stand in the way of love! Go get her!" (I probably would have quit the job if he hadn't have ok'd it, but I was glad he did). I landed in Ukraine right on Christmas day...right away there was massive chemistry between us. We just seemed to meet on all levels, have common values, etc. Anyway, I realized there wasn't really going to be an opportunity for us to "date" like normal, what with me living a few thousand miles away and already taking 2 weeks in the first 5 months of my job. It seemed crazy, but we both felt like we really knew each other and that we would have a great relationship. We took a big leap of faith and I asked her to marry me on New Year's Eve. We ended up setting the date for about a month later which meant I had to go ask my boss for another 3 weeks off...once again, thank God I have a really cool boss and he gave me his blessing.

As far as conversation goes...I guess we kind of did our dating over the phone and emails prior to meeting. Once we met, we both knew our intentions and what we were looking for so it was more intense.

As far as living with me...my wife tried many, many times, especially during the long visa process, to convince me to just move to her city. But in the end, I had to keep insisting it would be better for her to come to the USA since I couldn't speak Ukrainian and already had a good 9:30 to 4 job that paid well here and wouldn't be able to find anything similar in Ukraine.

Now to anyone else that I heard about getting married in such a short amount of time, I'd think they were crazy, stupid, or both! I definitely wouldn't recommend it. But in our case it turned out to be a great decision. We're coming up on our 5 year anniversary and things are as great as they were right in the beginning.

[Bad_Daddy 2,209]

As far as Why_me and Slim go, I don't think Kip would EVER stop fantasizing about twins in miniskirts or whatever.

What could be as good as having a go with two hot twins in mini skirts.....

Also, she was almost a nun...probably would have been, in fact, but the church refused her because she was an only child (thank God!).

....would be seducing a hot virgin nun.

Or you can go to Poland instead. Girls are pretty there too

Some of those Polish gals have funny shaped heads/cheek bones.

Edited January 4, 2012 by Why_Me

[slim 1,525]

As far as Why_me and Slim go, I don't Kip would EVER stop fantasizing about twins in miniskirts or whatever.

A man should never stop.

RUB chicks (not all by a long shot) can seem more aloof...as in a cold fish now and then. A lot of them can never be wrong no matter what, they can't take losing and they can be a bit selfish at times (that's a global woman trait imo RE my ex wife).

On the flip side they usually look terrific, they are tigers in the sack as long as you don't play meek. By that I mean sometimes you have to be a complete arsehole and they seem to get turned on by it...and that can be weary at times for the fact a relationship with a RUB chick can seem like one big long chess match that can make the head hurt at times like a giant migraine.

While I've seen the "lovey dovey" RUBbers, the majority tend to be like cats. "Go on and get you a couple rubs. Alright, that's enough. Leave me alone."

In the mean time, yep, it's eye candy and a lot of bullsh!t. That being said, they want a man and not some pushover. He can be as metro as he wants (after all, the man purse is European) but he better have his pimp hand strong or else he's going to get walked all over.

Uh...sometime we might want to discuss that 5-year "interim period." Normal? Unless you were in Sing-Sing, that's a long period of hanging loose. Nothing wrong with it, but I wouldn't call it normal.

Normal to me is two people meet, they date for some number of months to a few years, get engaged for up to one year, and finally get married. Then 2 to 8 years later they get divorced. The ex wife takes her ex husband to the cleaners, and lives long and prospers. The ex husband turns to drink, drugs and cheap women. This is the "new normal."

We still have three years to wait, but so far, we're on the "normal" path.

I had to fight over him with his American ex-girlfriend. OMG, she is hot.... To be honest, she is hotter than me. She did my hair for the wedding

So you're friends?

[baron555 934]

I don't think one person's experience can be taken as evidence. I'd look and see why you ended up with women with such negative personality traits and unhealthy attitudes toward relationships in the first place. As the saying goes, water seeks its own level. Something about you attracts and is attracted to these kinds of women.

I general I agree with these statements. I read all the time about guys (always guys) who try and try again and again, make trip after trip and always something happens ..... And always it's the evil woman's fault......and I think to myself "I wonder if the man has anything to do with these results?"

I always suggest for him to make a new master plan, those that do meet with success and many do not and they provide continued entertainment.

[baron555 934]

My wife and I were both looking for a GOOD relationship...someone that was marriage material. Elena's models happened to be the place we found each other. We emailed about a week, then added in talking on the phone through some really sh*tty phone cards (before I knew about Skype)...right on that first phone conversation things immediately clicked. So after about a month we really wanted to meet to see if we still felt the same way seeing each other in person. Now I had actually only been working at my job as a trader for about 5 months when I decided to take this 2 week vacation to Ukraine and I was already pretty nervous about asking my boss for that time off since I'd been there for such a short time. Thankfully he was really cool about it and said "Hey! I won't stand in the way of love! Go get her!" (I probably would have quit the job if he hadn't have ok'd it, but I was glad he did). I landed in Ukraine right on Christmas day...right away there was massive chemistry between us. We just seemed to meet on all levels, have common values, etc. Anyway, I realized there wasn't really going to be an opportunity for us to "date" like normal, what with me living a few thousand miles away and already taking 2 weeks in the first 5 months of my job. It seemed crazy, but we both felt like we really knew each other and that we would have a great relationship. We took a big leap of faith and I asked her to marry me on New Year's Eve. We ended up setting the date for about a month later which meant I had to go ask my boss for another 3 weeks off...once again, thank God I have a really cool boss and he gave me his blessing.

As far as conversation goes...I guess we kind of did our dating over the phone and emails prior to meeting. Once we met, we both knew our intentions and what we were looking for so it was more intense.

As far as living with me...my wife tried many, many times, especially during the long visa process, to convince me to just move to her city. But in the end, I had to keep insisting it would be better for her to come to the USA since I couldn't speak Ukrainian and already had a good 9:30 to 4 job that paid well here and wouldn't be able to find anything similar in Ukraine.

Now to anyone else that I heard about getting married in such a short amount of time, I'd think they were crazy, stupid, or both! I definitely wouldn't recommend it. But in our case it turned out to be a great decision. We're coming up on our 5 year anniversary and things are as great as they were right in the beginning.

We just passed our second anniversary and things ate actually better than in the beginning and our story echoes you guys......went against the "norm" but everything just clicked. Well have to meet up some time.

[slim 1,525]

"I wonder if the man has anything to do with these results?"

I wonder the same about men with multiple divorces.

Once, sure. It happens. But two, three, four times? I see a trend. At the very least these guys should own up to their selection habits since it's never their fault the marriages fail.

[ONA 133]

So you're friends?

Not really... I didn't see her before, I just knew she kept calling him, when we started dating.

My sister-in-law made my hair appointment - my husband made a mistake with trusting her with that I only found out that it was her the morning after the wedding. Glad my hair didn't fall out Screw my husband though - it's hard to go anywhere without running into a girl he used to date

I general I agree with these statements. I read all the time about guys (always guys) who try and try again and again, make trip after trip and always something happens ..... And always it's the evil woman's fault......and I think to myself "I wonder if the man has anything to do with these results?"

I always suggest for him to make a new master plan, those that do meet with success and many do not and they provide continued entertainment.

Agreed.

[visaveteran1 33]

No, it doesn't and I didn't say that it did.

You complain a lot though, VV. Too much.

You decided to post your history for a reason. I think it's reasonable to suspect you're defending your way of getting an American husband. OK, now we all know you're special.

I'll try to put out more dishonest "happy face" posts so you'll approve of me. That's important to me.

Edited January 4, 2012 by visaveteran1

[ONA 133]

You decided to post your history for a reason. I think it's reasonable to suspect you're defending your way of getting an American husband. OK, now we all know you're special.

I'll try to put out more dishonest "happy face" posts so you'll approve of me. That's important to me.

I posted my story replying to baron's post, not for you to think that I'm special.

You whine and complain about your "evil Russian wife" in every single thread here though - is there a reason for that?

[visaveteran1 33]

A word about why I post about my estranged wife.

When I first announced my wife and I were separating, Brad encouraged me, if I was willing, to discuss my situation further to educate others on why I thought we failed. I decided to proceed with the discussion as a cautionary tale for other American men looking for a foreign bride or in the early stage of courtship. I discuss what I refer to, in jest at times, as the dark side or the shadow of Russian women as demonstrated by my wife and the other RUB women I've known intimately. It would not make a lot of sense for me to praise my wife as we move toward divorce. Plus there's more than enough "lovey dovey" posts, to use Slim's term, to represent the positive or golden side.

My wife and I are on a friendly basis. I help her with rides and with extra money and we talk on the phone as friends. We spend time together and have gone out to dinner for her birthday and the holiday too. She's made it clear that if I want sex she will accommodate me...that is the Russian "matter of fact" attitude about sex showing through. No big deal. She seems happier with her new flat and her son is doing very well. And I am definitely moving out of a deep blue depression. Life is better.

In any event, I'm going to cease the discussion about my wife because I sense the forum is ready for that. When posters start insulting me and playing Doctor Phil with my head, I know it's time to change the subject. I will continue sharing my generalized thoughts on RUB women but my personal life is now only my business.

I will only add I've never been a big fan of women posters on here...that's just my personal reaction. Others like them posting. When the woman is Russian it is even worse...because they hear us discussing "locker room" and negative comments about THEM. I have no interest in posting to a Russian woman's forum even if I could read and write in Russian. Not everything has to be co-ed. Frankly, I don't care to hear "the woman's view." Other men will adamantly disagree. They may see the female posters as mascots or something, and maybe get off on trading sexy comments with them.

None of it is a big deal. I can deal with it. Just keeping it real...as always.

Edited January 4, 2012 by visaveteran1

[LvivLovers 39]

We just passed our second anniversary and things ate actually better than in the beginning and our story echoes you guys......went against the "norm" but everything just clicked. Well have to meet up some time.

Grats! Yeah...I just felt like...this is the woman I have always been looking for and I highly doubt I will ever find a woman this great ever again...so why play games or waste time waiting! I don't know if it was smart thing to do or a dumb thing to do and we just got lucky! Either way, it worked out.

Sounds good!

[visaveteran1 33]

Evil exists in the world. Like in Cho, the VA Tech shooter. Or home invaders who rape, torture and murder for the pure joy of it. We live among mad dogs. This is evil.

I've never personally known an evil woman...Russian or otherwise. The choice of the word "evil" is not mine, and those who use it do so cavalierly and in poor form, in my judgment. My critical references are to the qualities of being a wife, not to being a human being. Some people are not cut out for marriage, yet probably are very good people in many other ways.

For men, the single rational I can think of for getting into a monogamous relationship is having a steady, predictable sex partner. Any other benefits are all obtainable without a 24/7/365 deal. Want a fresh baked cake? Go to the German bakery. Need your place cleaned...call in the Latina Maids. Need your shirts ironed? Go to the Korean Dry Cleaners. Dirty dishes? Let Kenmore help you.

Oh wait...there's "love." Best way to kill it...get married. Sooner or later, you'll stop sending her flowers...and she'll stop shopping at Victoria's Secret. I felt real "love" when I was young. I did. That's the time of a young man's fancy for the ladies. I went crazy in love and, frankly, love can be painful...even physically. "Love sick" is a real malady. But when the white hair starts to show up, love is quite different...more rational and controlled and less wild in it's effects.

As to fault and the blame game..I will own the break-up of my first marriage was more to do with me and untreated PTSD, then my wife. Yet I made it 22 years before falling. Better than the average.

For those singing their happy songs about their wonderful marriage...let's wait and see. Can you make it 22 years? If you can, then start bragging. A few years with the wife any man can do standing up. Heck, forget 22 years...I'll applaud 10 years with the same lady.