Support needed- how to cope with waiting for NOA2???

[kwbaille 0]

The waiting is getting to me too. It's even harder considering there's such a vast difference in time. It's just more depressing than anything. Just know that the waiting is worth it so don't give up.

[cheerstoamerica 21]

Interesting. My fiance got an email saying that my request was approved:

Application Type: I129F , PETITION FOR FIANCE(E)

Your Case Status: Post Decision Activity

On September 26, 2011, we mailed you a notice that we have approved this I129F PETITION FOR FIANCE(E).

But it's November 17 and I still didn't get anything! I am really worried because my visa expires in January and I need to receive the package as soon as possible to start making the procedures (documents, fees, medical examination) and then the interview.

Please, cam anyone tell me if it takes that long?? Thank you.

Tell your fiance to call NVC pronto! You need the case number to get things goin!

[fiancee86 5]

Yeah blogging is a good idea too! A joint blog where you can both update it so you can look forward to what they write and share whats going on with you. Ben and I are also making a website thats a joint 'our story' and wedding website, there are a lot of free places to make a website and it can maybe be part of the proof of a continuing relationship (BONUS!) Ours is on Yola.com but there are others too, we have our visa timeline on there too ;D Even with it all you'll prob still break down sometimes (I do x.x) but at least it can help you stay positive

Yes, very cool idea! Thanks for the input! And yeah it is a great bonus as a proof of relationship.

[fiancee86 5]

I know exactly how you feel...just try to stay busy. It helps if you and your fiance have a joint project to work on (besides the visa lol), Ben and I are both very artistic and creative and so we are going to work on making a music video together, as well as a joint writing project and graphic novel. Stuff like that will help the distance seem not so far, the time not so long and you will have something precious and wonderful you can look back on for years to come (and show to kids one day )

Thank you for your ideas! All the support I am getting it means a lot to me. We are all in the same boat. It feels nice to share similar experiences and feelings.

[fiancee86 5]

Get a (2nd) job so that your time will be busy and you will have extra money to enjoy together.

Learn something new or really dive into the language of your beloved. I'm studying a second language right now with LearnWithTexts for vocabulary input

Learning With Texts

It's free and on the web and took me all of about 30 minutes to figure out. This is just one example of something you can do.

I also sewed gifts for him and his parents. They are handkerchief users, so I bought the fabric and then after edging them, I embroidered personalized things, poetry, goofy symbols, names, etc. That alone killed about 3 weeks of the time.

Start a blog about your immigration experience. Read through the gobs of forum posts here. Talk to other immigrants.

Make something romantic. I made a silver ring over the last 4 months. http://emilylikestomakestuffdiy.blogspot.com/2011/10/silver-ring-from-quarter.html

My beloved wears this always now.

The video suggestion is great. I like to do that, too. It takes a lot of time to edit and organize and a short 3 or 4 minute video can kill an entire afternoon easily.

Indulge in all the books/movies/games that you enjoy.

If you can text each other, do that like crazy. Talk about your beloved with every poor, unsuspecting soul that crosses your path.

Clean a lot.

Hang in there.

Thanks so much for your support! You have offered me so many ideas, where do I begin? )) Very helpful and creative! Thanks!

Lol Thank you! And thanks for saying I look super young coz I really am not (I think). I'm in my mid 20s already.

I got ideas from this website too http://www.lovingfromadistance.com/thingsforldrcouplestodo.html

You are welcomed! Mid 20s...well that's pretty young girl.

Thanks for the link, I will check it out!

Yup...I remember the waiting. The waiting was h*ll.

It's amazing how fast all of the stress melted away the moment we were back together again. It was almost like the waiting never happened!

Hang in there...your day will come...and it will be worth the wait!!!

You know what...I am imagining that moment each day! I can't wait to experience it and be with my love! I appreciate the support, thank you!!

[fiancee86 5]

Just remember that these timelines, they're just guides. i missed/miss my fiance hugely and some days it really felt genuinely far too much to bear but we had our NOA2 at the four month mark. I'd never have expected that, I'm generally one of the clumsiest/unluckiest people ever, so just keep yourself occupied but you know, when you feel overwhelmed with missing him, allow yourself to do so for a bit. I grew to see the missing him as very much part of the loving him. Of course, nothing makes up for being With them, but I'd rather miss him than Have anybody else. Just keep your eye on the finish line and remember what you are doing this for. Channel your energy into productive stuff, making daft video clips, writing letters, collecting random things from your day to send. It all matters Good luck with your path.

You are right.Most of the timelines are just guides and each case is individual. They way my luck is running...I think we gonna be waiting a bit longer. . But who knows,maybe I will be nicely surprised. Thank you so much for your support. Helps a lot!

[fiancee86 5]

I would download or rip a movie and send it to my wife. Then, we'd both load up our laptop movie players, set our skype to "always stay on top" and we'd click play on the movie at the same time. That way, we'd watch a movie together, and be able to see each other's faces and hear each other's comments all throughout the movie.

Also, sometimes, (our difference was 12 hours), so she would send me to sleep while getting ready in the mid-morning. I would do the same for her as well.

Send each other packages as often as you can. Those things are precious.

Hang in there, I agree with what someone said, after you're together, it'll all melt away as you realize how worth it it was.

Plus, once you've been through this, imo, you can make it through anything.

We thought of the movie idea too, but it is not really possible because of our time differences. I am 6 hours ahead of him and we talk when is late my time. Maybe on weekends we can do that. Anyways it is a great idea. I love movies and I think it will be nice.

I agree with you strongly-if we can make through this we can make it through anything else.

Thanks for the support!!!

[fiancee86 5]

Why don't you do your timeline here as well so we can see your progress, I did Insanity 2 years ago. Crazy!!

I am still new to the site,once I figure it all out I would definitely do it.

So cool though fellow insanity follower! I love it! It get me so motivated and I feel I can do anything. Right? Do you still do it? I would imagine

you are in a great shape!

Thanks for the support!!!

Hate to make you feel bad but just because it says 5 months doesnt mean much. Mine is at California and hit the 5 months today.

No worries, your are not making me feel bad. It is just the way it is. I can deal with 5 months, I am more worried if its more until the NOA2. Then I think I would go nuts.

I hope you get yours soon!

Thanks for the support!!!

[fiancee86 5]

I think what everyone has suggested here is great but at the of the day, you have to be patient as there is nothing that can speed up the process. We have been waiting just on 4 months and its so frustrating to see people get approved before you when they have a later date gggrrr. My fiancee and I talk every day and that helps. I am planning a trip at Christmas to see him other than that, its just a waiting game. Good luck and keep your chin up, just think this time next year you could be together!!

I agree with you. These great ideas help a lot, but waiting is the only option for all of us. It can be little discouraging when you see people getting approved before you, but I think being truly happy for the others is better than getting annoyed, because it will bring good energy.

Well, you are on your 4th month, I think you will be approved soon. Good luck!

The thought me and my fiance being together soon( I hope) is my biggest motivation!

Thank you for the support!!!!

[fiancee86 5]

I'm going to be the one with the truth bomb here... *deep breath* ...

NOA2 isn't the end.

There is more work, stress, money, paperwork and more beyond that. It took 7 months total for my husband and I to get married and our NOA2 came at 4 months. Now I am saying this to prepare you, NOT discourage you. The good news is that if you have each other to lean on and vent too. The time apart is sooo hard but that build up is almost rewarding in the end you know? Like a WOW WE DID IT! kind of feeling. It's a marathon. Pace yourself, remember why you are both sacrificing so much right now and realize that in the grand picture it's only a pinch of time compared to the lifetime together ahead

PS. Great things to do right now to pass the time is plan for the future together

Start thinking about the next step and gather paperwork and documents together.

Plan the wedding.

Start a scrapbook or photo album and start putting pictures, plane ticket stubs and other things in it that you have and create an "Our Journey" album or something like it. A great thing to have down the line for the Green Card interview

Hey, is not a bad thing... it is quite refreshing that you are direct and telling me the truth. I am well aware that the NOA2 is not the end, but I would be extremely calmer and happier once I get it. It's a whole different process from there. Not knowing that we are approved is very hard for me. After I'll know that,I can relax little more.

I like your comparison to a marathon. I certainly feel that way. And it is a great advice to pace myself and sacrifice the little things now, but I know what the big picture is and that what it matters at the end of the day.

Thank you for the support! And being blunt! I appreciate it!

[fiancee86 5]

unfortunatelly missing your loved one will not go away no matter what you do. personally, i drawed. try to find a hobby, something that represents you. or if you're a nerd like me try playing some online

Yeah, very true. That's what makes it hard-not matter how busy you get, the missing never stops.

I play online games too, its fun.

Thanks for the support!!!

[fiancee86 5]

The waiting is getting to me too. It's even harder considering there's such a vast difference in time. It's just more depressing than anything. Just know that the waiting is worth it so don't give up.

I know how you feel. It is the same for all of us. It will pass soon. What comes after is worth all the waiting and pain.

We have similar timeline- we filled on 3rd of October!!! Good luck and I hope it all works out.

Thank you for the support!

[fiancee86 5]

I would just try and relax a little. You have a life to live where you are and she has a life to live where she is. You just can't stop living your life and wait in anguish. You have to take care of yourself first before you can be in a successful relationship otherwise your just going to get lost and become a depressed desperate person that your fiance doesn't know you by.

Its like when you are in an airplane and they give you those cheesy instructions in case of an emergency. First put your oxygen mask on then help anyone else that needs help putting theres on. They say that because if you dont put yours on first you become may become oxygen deprived and useless to other people. Just think of waiting for you guys to be together as something that triggered the masks from dropping down in front of you on a plane. It can be a stressful crisis but if you just put the oxygen mask on yourself your going to be ok and the people around you will be ok.

I have been in an LDR for 2 years with my newly engaged fiance I have more to wait too kasi I haven't even sent in my petition in yet, but i would try and spend some time with your friends and family and advise your fiance to spend some time with her friends and family as well and encourage her to try and have a good time and be happy. I guess its a little easier for some people than others.... im more of an independent type person so I am just waiting patiently. It helps me too to look at other peoples timelines on this website as well and see how long from when they met until they have finally been together. Some of relationships have been going on longer than mine so that gives me faith in love and the human ability to wait patiently towards achieving whatever long term goals they may have.

Also these are the last months that you will be single so just think of it that way get any little projects done and enjoy it the best way you can with friends because things are going to change

No,I won't let myself live in a depressed state. I deal with it is good, just there are days when you are down and feel alone. This process in NOT EASY for anyone! It gets to us from time to time. If anything I am very motivated to better myself more in the few months of waiting.

Nice analogy with the oxygen. I liked it.

Thank you for the support!!!

Work. Work all of the time. At the end of the day you'll be too tired to think about it. Rinse and repeat.

Yup! I am very busy actually! I think I have hard time when I stop and think about everything.Since these process has started I am realizing that I don't like the silence anymore! ).

Thanks for the support!!!

My NOA2 was already approved. And believe me, it's worth the wait. Once you get yours, you'll be screaming for joy. I went crazy over the phone when I called my fiance after getting an e-mail from USCIS.

By the way, try Bikram Yoga also known as hot yoga. It's gonna feel harsh at first but the succeeding sessions will make you feel goooood. It will also improve your posture and tone your muscles.

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Congratulations!!! Oh I can't wait to scream out of joy and happiness.Although the happiest day would be when I will see my finace at the airport and get to kiss him and hug him!!!

Yoga sounds good. I will look it up.

Thanks!!!

[fiancee86 5]

Don't worry you'll be fine! Its quite an anti-climax when the NOA2 comes through. Until then, you must try to be patient but most of all, think about ALL the many things you have to be grateful for in your life. That always made me feel so much more positive and focusing on the positive things is the best pain killer!

You should also sign up for SMS and email notifications on the USCIS website. I signed my fiance (the american national) up to sms's and me to emails so we both got the notification at the same time.

Good Luck

We are signed up for the email notifications. We just have to wait. I am keeping positive, I have to! . I agree with you though- this makes you appreciate everything you hold dear even more.

Thanks for the support!

[Nicoco 26]

The pain is knowing that you have to keep living as if it is normal while you are apart. Trying to hold a LDR with someone who wakes up when you go to bed is hard.

Best thing to do is find an inner peace. I tried being distracted....heck, these last 7 months I should have not had time to worry/miss him! Full time student, full time job, part time job, AND I organized all of the petition and packet 3 and 4. But I still had time to cry everyday on the way home from nightclasses or on the way to the store.