age different

[Together4ever 1]

About the test.

Storm coming yet again, I need to get offline.

lol I do enjoy your sense of humor JW

I don't see any need for storms here anyway, just discussions. I will admit when what I have done was stupid or juvenile. I will also allow others their opinions. I did what I did and it worked for me. What JP does works for her. There is no way either of us could be happy in each others shoes and we both know it.

The only time I get angry on these boards is when I see personal attacks that are hurtful. I haven't seen that in this discussion.

No, there was a literal storm coming.... thunder, lightening, wind... and I had to get offline so I didn't risk frying my computer. *slaps forehead*

See? I can't say anything right these days...

[morocco4ever 63]

About the test.

Storm coming yet again, I need to get offline.

lol I do enjoy your sense of humor JW

I don't see any need for storms here anyway, just discussions. I will admit when what I have done was stupid or juvenile. I will also allow others their opinions. I did what I did and it worked for me. What JP does works for her. There is no way either of us could be happy in each others shoes and we both know it.

The only time I get angry on these boards is when I see personal attacks that are hurtful. I haven't seen that in this discussion.

I thought it was another one of your "tongue in cheek" comments...lol...my bad?

No, there was a literal storm coming.... thunder, lightening, wind... and I had to get offline so I didn't risk frying my computer. *slaps forehead*

See? I can't say anything right these days...

[honeyblonde 0]

When Abdel and I decided to marry he was 38. We discussed never having children since I don't really want any more and have had my tubes tied. He said he certainly wouldn't care if we didn't have kids since at his age he never even expected to marry, so a wife without children was better than no wife or children.

Now that he's here and we've been married for a while and I see what a wonderful father he would be, we've discussed getting my tubes untied and having a child together. I'll be about 47 when we are planning to try to do this. We can't afford it right now and I want to finish school first.

What's funny is that since he started working he spends his breaks at work listening to men who work two jobs to pay child support. Last week he did some side work with a guy whose ex even took his house. Now that he is seeing how things can be here he is rethinking the parent thing. I reminded him that I am the one with the house and stuff so if there's anything to be taken he won't be the one losing out. That made him laugh and put him in a better mood, but he's still not as sure he wants to be a parent.

He says in Morocco poor people have a lot of children so there will always be a child to care for the parents. There are no retirement funds or nursing homes there for the poor, so if there isn't a child left to take care of them then who will?

As we discuss pregnancy and parenthood he says that he never knew a person could think so much about having a baby. He said there you just do it. He hears me worry about baby furniture and going to parent teacher meetings and getting up at night to feed a baby and paying for it to go to college and it all makes his head spin. Now he is starting to understand why it's such a big deal to me.

[morocco4ever 63]

When Abdel and I decided to marry he was 38. We discussed never having children since I don't really want any more and have had my tubes tied. He said he certainly wouldn't care if we didn't have kids since at his age he never even expected to marry, so a wife without children was better than no wife or children.

Now that he's here and we've been married for a while and I see what a wonderful father he would be, we've discussed getting my tubes untied and having a child together. I'll be about 47 when we are planning to try to do this. We can't afford it right now and I want to finish school first.

What's funny is that since he started working he spends his breaks at work listening to men who work two jobs to pay child support. Last week he did some side work with a guy whose ex even took his house. Now that he is seeing how things can be here he is rethinking the parent thing. I reminded him that I am the one with the house and stuff so if there's anything to be taken he won't be the one losing out. That made him laugh and put him in a better mood, but he's still not as sure he wants to be a parent.

He says in Morocco poor people have a lot of children so there will always be a child to care for the parents. There are no retirement funds or nursing homes there for the poor, so if there isn't a child left to take care of them then who will?

As we discuss pregnancy and parenthood he says that he never knew a person could think so much about having a baby. He said there you just do it. He hears me worry about baby furniture and going to parent teacher meetings and getting up at night to feed a baby and paying for it to go to college and it all makes his head spin. Now he is starting to understand why it's such a big deal to me.

Whatever you 2 decide, I wish the best for you. I had my tubes untied in February, and the doctor said it was a success, so it can be accomplished.

As for giving it much thought, well I will admit my first marriage I never thought about it, but after having 4 kids and a worthless SOB for a husband I have learned that it isn't a matter to take lightly.

[Ban Hammer 13,346]

About the test.

Storm coming yet again, I need to get offline.

lol I do enjoy your sense of humor JW

I don't see any need for storms here anyway, just discussions. I will admit when what I have done was stupid or juvenile. I will also allow others their opinions. I did what I did and it worked for me. What JP does works for her. There is no way either of us could be happy in each others shoes and we both know it.

The only time I get angry on these boards is when I see personal attacks that are hurtful. I haven't seen that in this discussion.

No, there was a literal storm coming.... thunder, lightening, wind... and I had to get offline so I didn't risk frying my computer. *slaps forehead*

See? I can't say anything right these days...

get an ups

[Together4ever 1]

I would if this stupid visa process wasn't snarfing up every extra penny I have...

*taps the consulate on the shoulder in case they forget they STILL haven't issued the visa...*

I wanted to add, more on topic, we do have an age difference and the consular officer questioned him most heavily about the issue of having children during his interview. She asked him 7 times "Don't you want children?" He kept replying that children come if Allah wills it and it is not the most important thing to him. He just wants me. He chose me. And as loves to say "end of story." He started getting hyper on her. lol I was just miffed because I'm not so old I can't bear children. Geez. Like I need them rushing me to my grave or something.

[sarah and hicham 3]

Hicham and I both want kids- but not for 6 or 7 more years so we're gonna relax for a while.

[honeyblonde 0]

Hicham and I both want kids- but not for 6 or 7 more years so we're gonna relax for a while.

Smart girl! I had my oldest son when I was 19 and really wish I had had a few years to be a kid myself. Enjoy the time together as a couple first.

[morocco4ever 63]

I would if this stupid visa process wasn't snarfing up every extra penny I have...

*taps the consulate on the shoulder in case they forget they STILL haven't issued the visa...*

I wanted to add, more on topic, we do have an age difference and the consular officer questioned him most heavily about the issue of having children during his interview. She asked him 7 times "Don't you want children?" He kept replying that children come if Allah wills it and it is not the most important thing to him. He just wants me. He chose me. And as loves to say "end of story." He started getting hyper on her. lol I was just miffed because I'm not so old I can't bear children. Geez. Like I need them rushing me to my grave or something.

You know that is so strange, I suspect I am older than you but the issue wasn't even brought up during my husbands interview. I kind of suspect that they would have used this on a second interview and sent it back again, but I already addressed it with my rebuttal to the CIS.

I know I am a bit dense, bad memory, but you are on AP, correct? Have you called the DOS for updates? Is it in Washington? I can't believe they would hold this just because you both don't want kids! Thats just crazy, but who knows with these consulates! It could be possible they are just running the gammet of security checks, taking their time because they think it is a fraud marriage, and eventually you will give up. I do believe they do this kind of thing on a regular basis.

[sarah and hicham 3]

I have a question about Casa.

I have noticed that it seems like married couples have been having a harder time than engaged couples lately. Has anyone else noticed this or is it just me? Why do you think this is?

[morocco4ever 63]

I have a question about Casa.

I have noticed that it seems like married couples have been having a harder time than engaged couples lately. Has anyone else noticed this or is it just me? Why do you think this is?

It seems to go in spurts. First they were approving the fiance, but the married couples were getting denied. Then it seemed to switch to fiances getting denied. Now we are back to married couples. Weird isn't it!

[ya falaha! 0]

I second that..very smart decision. I had my oldest when I was 22 and my youngest at 23. I wasn't TOO young but I really could've waited. Alhamdulillah I still have a few good years in me for baby makin'. I'd like to wait a year or so before I try to get pregnant but Mohamed doesn't like that idea. Sheesh his parents started on me as soon as we were married. They even kinda talked about it before hand too.

Hicham and I both want kids- but not for 6 or 7 more years so we're gonna relax for a while.

Smart girl! I had my oldest son when I was 19 and really wish I had had a few years to be a kid myself. Enjoy the time together as a couple first.

[Jenn! 918]

I have a question about Casa.

I have noticed that it seems like married couples have been having a harder time than engaged couples lately. Has anyone else noticed this or is it just me? Why do you think this is?

It seems to go in spurts. First they were approving the fiance, but the married couples were getting denied. Then it seemed to switch to fiances getting denied. Now we are back to married couples. Weird isn't it!

Has someone gotten denied by Casa recently?

[sarah and hicham 3]

I have a question about Casa.

I have noticed that it seems like married couples have been having a harder time than engaged couples lately. Has anyone else noticed this or is it just me? Why do you think this is?

It seems to go in spurts. First they were approving the fiance, but the married couples were getting denied. Then it seemed to switch to fiances getting denied. Now we are back to married couples. Weird isn't it!

Has someone gotten denied by Casa recently?

I don't know I'm just looking at the past.

I second that..very smart decision. I had my oldest when I was 22 and my youngest at 23. I wasn't TOO young but I really could've waited. Alhamdulillah I still have a few good years in me for baby makin'. I'd like to wait a year or so before I try to get pregnant but Mohamed doesn't like that idea. Sheesh his parents started on me as soon as we were married. They even kinda talked about it before hand too.

Hicham and I both want kids- but not for 6 or 7 more years so we're gonna relax for a while.

Smart girl! I had my oldest son when I was 19 and really wish I had had a few years to be a kid myself. Enjoy the time together as a couple first.

Well we're really not in a rush I mean I am straight out of school and Hicham has a few tasks he needs to take care of before we really settle down (such as learning English). We figure we'll work for a while then hopefully decide where we want to start a family when we're ready and prepared.

[Jenn! 918]

I have a question about Casa.

I have noticed that it seems like married couples have been having a harder time than engaged couples lately. Has anyone else noticed this or is it just me? Why do you think this is?

It seems to go in spurts. First they were approving the fiance, but the married couples were getting denied. Then it seemed to switch to fiances getting denied. Now we are back to married couples. Weird isn't it!

Has someone gotten denied by Casa recently?

I don't know I'm just looking at the past.

Yeah, Morocco4 Ever said that Casa is back to denying married couples, and I was wondering who's been denied recently.