gosh--this is really hard some days

[wynterstail 0]

Most of you seem to have already gotten through the worst of this process, and have your husband here with you now. I'm just having a moment (OK, well, more than moment) of missing my honey so much, and feeling like--what if I can't ever see him...what if they just won't give us the damn visa. Did you all have those feelings...like, I don't care about anything else I'm going to get on a plane right now? This horrible ache from missing someone, and then he calls and then you really miss him...I just needed to vent and this felt like a safe place. You know, you hardly can even tell people around you that you're getting married because when people know you're marrying someone outside the county, they look at you like you have two heads...

Ann

[snz1802 0]

I know what you are going through Ann, it is hard for people to understand that are not going through it themselves. I have felt this way myself many many times. What has gotten me through it is I have to remind myself each and every day what we are doing this for, what the outcome of this waiting period will be. It will be the rest of our lives...TOGETHER. Yes I know all these thoughts run through your head, like what if we don't get it and others, but just try and clear your head, follow all the steps, make sure everything is right and leave it in God's hands. That is really all you can do. That is what I have done, and each day I remind myself, to stay POSITIVE, and that we are doing this for our wonderful future together and that we ARE GOING TO HAVE A WONDERFUL FUTURE AND THE REST OF OUR LIVES TOGETHER after this process. This is just a step we have to take to get there, that's all. It does require a great deal of patience, which I have had to learn to have, but if you are strong, you can do it. I know you can!!!!!!

~Stacey

[wynterstail 0]

Thanks Stacey--I actually teared up reading your post (not like me, what's coming over me?)

I ask God every day to keep His hand on this thing for us...I have moments when I just feel furious that this process even exsists--like, how dare they and who the hell are they to put people through this nightmare, and stop anyone from getting married if that's what they want to do.

But you are right--someday this part will be completed and we will be together always, God willing.

Ann

I know what you are going through Ann, it is hard for people to understand that are not going through it themselves. I have felt this way myself many many times. What has gotten me through it is I have to remind myself each and every day what we are doing this for, what the outcome of this waiting period will be. It will be the rest of our lives...TOGETHER. Yes I know all these thoughts run through your head, like what if we don't get it and others, but just try and clear your head, follow all the steps, make sure everything is right and leave it in God's hands. That is really all you can do. That is what I have done, and each day I remind myself, to stay POSITIVE, and that we are doing this for our wonderful future together and that we ARE GOING TO HAVE A WONDERFUL FUTURE AND THE REST OF OUR LIVES TOGETHER after this process. This is just a step we have to take to get there, that's all. It does require a great deal of patience, which I have had to learn to have, but if you are strong, you can do it. I know you can!!!!!!

~Stacey

[Kath 0]

hi there

i tell ya i remember all the above feelings..it is one of the hardest things you go through .. to be seperated from the one you love for so long...my now husband wanted to sell up everything leave a 20 year job and come to australia to be with me...i couldnt let him do that...we never argued over it just pointed out why we are doing it this way what we will have together when it is finally over and expressed our inner most feeling for each other daily...

now i am here in the states it is everything we strived for he is more content and so am i happy as larry we are...

your next big step is the interview that also can be nerve racking but lots get through it an say the same thing ..what the hell were we worried about...

the process we go through is so long winded that true love wins ....its a very emotional roller coaster but we all get through it ..lots to look forward to ...your wedding day...starting a life together... filling out forms again .. the wait again.. and finally getting that greencard and your AOS approved...

good luck to you

kath

[snz1802 0]

Thanks Stacey--I actually teared up reading your post (not like me, what's coming over me?)

I ask God every day to keep His hand on this thing for us...I have moments when I just feel furious that this process even exsists--like, how dare they and who the hell are they to put people through this nightmare, and stop anyone from getting married if that's what they want to do.

But you are right--someday this part will be completed and we will be together always, God willing.

Ann

I know what you are going through Ann, it is hard for people to understand that are not going through it themselves. I have felt this way myself many many times. What has gotten me through it is I have to remind myself each and every day what we are doing this for, what the outcome of this waiting period will be. It will be the rest of our lives...TOGETHER. Yes I know all these thoughts run through your head, like what if we don't get it and others, but just try and clear your head, follow all the steps, make sure everything is right and leave it in God's hands. That is really all you can do. That is what I have done, and each day I remind myself, to stay POSITIVE, and that we are doing this for our wonderful future together and that we ARE GOING TO HAVE A WONDERFUL FUTURE AND THE REST OF OUR LIVES TOGETHER after this process. This is just a step we have to take to get there, that's all. It does require a great deal of patience, which I have had to learn to have, but if you are strong, you can do it. I know you can!!!!!!

~Stacey

Yes Ann, someday you will be together forever and if you ever need to talk you can always PM me anytime. OK...... everything is going to be ok - Stacey

[Jasman0717 9]

I remember going through what you are going through, especially right after Claudeth's interview when the embassy misplaced her police report translation. I didn't think they would ever find it! Hang in there, you will get through it and will be able to give support for others following in your footsteps!

[Ladylethal 12]

I know how it feels. I haven't seen my fiance in 8 months now, and I can't wait for this process to be over.

[wynterstail 0]

Yes, I know the battle isn't even over when they finally arrive...then you get to start Phase II--but right now I would so happy if all I had to worry about was filling out more papers and spending more money. Thanks for helping me stay on the positive side.

Ann

hi there

i tell ya i remember all the above feelings..it is one of the hardest things you go through .. to be seperated from the one you love for so long...my now husband wanted to sell up everything leave a 20 year job and come to australia to be with me...i couldnt let him do that...we never argued over it just pointed out why we are doing it this way what we will have together when it is finally over and expressed our inner most feeling for each other daily...

now i am here in the states it is everything we strived for he is more content and so am i happy as larry we are...

your next big step is the interview that also can be nerve racking but lots get through it an say the same thing ..what the hell were we worried about...

the process we go through is so long winded that true love wins ....its a very emotional roller coaster but we all get through it ..lots to look forward to ...your wedding day...starting a life together... filling out forms again .. the wait again.. and finally getting that greencard and your AOS approved...

good luck to you

kath

[bora bora 1]

Oooooh, I feel that way too sometimes.

It really does hurt.

I know that we'll have to do alot my fiance comes, but at least we'll be together!!

It has been about 2 months since I've seen meu amor and I can't wait 'til he comes!!!!!!!

[Nessa 23]

I think we all feel that way Almost 7 months here. But I'm thinking positive, it will happen, we will be together. Hang in there.

Nessa

[Scott & Maylene 0]

Ann- your not alone. I keep reminding myself that their are many couples that have waited much longer than me. It is so hard when you have absolutely no control over the situation and it is left up to the most inefficient people in the world. WOW, I guess I am having a moment too. It is very hard to wait.

[wynterstail 0]

I really have no idea why these people (the US Government) have not only this level of control over who you marry, but that the process, once it gets to the Embassy,is so subjective. Actually, I think the process is much more hazardous if you come from an underdeveloped country, as opposed to a "western" country.

Ann- your not alone. I keep reminding myself that their are many couples that have waited much longer than me. It is so hard when you have absolutely no control over the situation and it is left up to the most inefficient people in the world. WOW, I guess I am having a moment too. It is very hard to wait.

[isleta521 5]

Ann,

Everyday being a continent away from her was hard - most of the time unbearable. It is tough but you will both make it. We had many nights crying into the phone. Always waiting and many sleepless nights.

It will come.

[wynterstail 0]

God bless everyone for their good thoughts and encouragement. I did have one of those break-down-on- the-phone calls last night (sniffle); It can all feel so scary and out of control. We all have to keep praying for the best and supporting each other. If it wasn't for this VJ board, I really may have lost it by now...

Ann

Ann,

Everyday being a continent away from her was hard - most of the time unbearable. It is tough but you will both make it. We had many nights crying into the phone. Always waiting and many sleepless nights.

It will come.

[alix 20]

Ann,

I know exactly how you feel. Breakdowns happen to me every other week. I've been married for a year and had to leave everything behind to wait for this visa in Brazil. It hurts everyday. My husband, my house, my life are all in the US. I miss him so much. We have such a great relationship and it's really tough to all of a sudden be away. We have never been apart for more than 2 weeks since we got married. I've been here for two months and will probably be for another two. It's funny but I feel so out of place in my own country...because I have to stay at other people's houses. All I want is go home.

My heart goes to all of you who have to be long periods of time away from your love. Fortunately he came to see me after 5 weeks apart, but now he can only come for the interview (my case isn't even at the consulate yet!). I wish he could stay here with me but he has to take care of the house and he has to work.

The only good thing is that once this is over, we are going to be together forever!! So hang in there! If anyone needs support, please PM me!

Alix