Is this marriage feasible?

[kennym 275]

Another thought is;

the cultural aspect.. It could be very very dificult for your spouse in Rwanda.. My wife came to see me in Trinidad a few times, and frankly, that country was simply not the place for her.. Although, where we stayed was safe, she was basically confined to a very small area while I was at work and quiet boring for her there.. that was one of the reasons we didn't consider doing the DCF in Trinidad.. And it makes it much more dificult with children..

There is a lot to think about it.. The last consideration is to not take the assignment in Rwanda.. For me, it was easier, since I was allowed to fly to Colombia on a monthly basis.. My wife and I kept an appartment in Colombia where we lived and we called that home until my assignment ended...

Does you assignment have home travel options? could you do the same thing I did?

It was a wonderful way for us to develop our relationship.. At times, I would fly her to Trinidad where she could spend a few weeks at a time there as well... But then she returned home.. It was better than her living there because it simply was not a good place for a Colombianna..

Edited October 16, 2011 by kennym

[nebodihome 0]

A couple of thoughts..

I also had this same situation.. I worked in Trinidad and Tobago for about 3 years.. My wife and I waited to file the Paperwork until I returned to the US...

We considered that we could marry outside the US, she could come live with me and we could do a Direct Counselor filing prior to wrapping up in T&T.. However, we decided to wait.. Thankfully, my company flew me home monthly, so I changed my residense with my job to Colombia... All along, my income was considered as US income and I filed US Taxes showing that income...

The option for you may be to consider the possiblity of getting your wife legal status in Rwanda, then wait until a year or so, before your assignment wraps up in RWANDA then file directly at the Embassy there..

Alternately, she could either stay in Colombia or Come to the US and simply live in the US with your family.. She cannot live outside the US while she has a GC since she could loose here residency status...

Otherwise, you will need to consider waiting until you're ready to move to the US to file the Petition..

Kenny

I spoke with my boss about this today (before posting here) and he did mention that if I had a spouse, they (the company) would need to "take care of the paperwork for that". He said this knowing that I am not currently married and that my fiancee is living in Colombia. He also mentioned he is aware that if she was to become a U.S. citizen, she would need to stay in the U.S. for some time without leaving. He is also the one sending me to Africa in July. --- Considering all of this, I sense that they would work out the paperwork for her (otherwise he would have pointed out that it's not possible at the moment since she needs time to naturalize in the U.S.). He also said family life in this situation is actually quite doable, "especially in Africa, where laws are loose on this."

Also, obviously I am not working for the U.S. government, but the first question/answer here offers some guidance none the less: http://www.state.gov/m/dghr/flo/c23169.htm So, the Dep. of State would sponsor it.

[nebodihome 0]

Another thought is;

the cultural aspect.. It could be very very dificult for your spouse in Rwanda.. My wife came to see me in Trinidad a few times, and frankly, that country was simply not the place for her.. Although, where we stayed was safe, she was basically confined to a very small area while I was at work and quiet boring for her there.. that was one of the reasons we didn't consider doing the DCF in Trinidad.. And it makes it much more dificult with children..

There is a lot to think about it.. The last consideration is to not take the assignment in Rwanda.. For me, it was easier, since I was allowed to fly to Colombia on a monthly basis.. My wife and I kept an appartment in Colombia where we lived and we called that home until my assignment ended...

Does you assignment have home travel options? could you do the same thing I did?

It was a wonderful way for us to develop our relationship.. At times, I would fly her to Trinidad where she could spend a few weeks at a time there as well... But then she returned home.. It was better than her living there because it simply was not a good place for a Colombianna..

I am not sure how much travel options my assignment will have. I know my company will pay for business flights within Africa, back to the U.S., and possibly to Dubai. Remember, I am just starting after a Masters and am young-- I don't think they will fund my travels to see a fiancee in Colombia.

I think if I was in T&T, I would be thinking differently because T&T is a cheap and quick flight from Colombia (I assume).

I agree with your point on life in Rwanda, although my thinking is that where she would actually live (the neighborhood) would be better than the neighborhood she currently lives in. Also, I think the experience for her daughter to grow up for two years in such a place (and learn French, their second official language) could be awesome and my fiancee agrees.

If I knew for a fact that it would only be two years, I would probably just wait. However, my boss told me that in two years, it will really be up to me where I want to take my career. I could go back to the U.S. or have better opportunities in emerging markets like Asia and Latin America (wouldn't that be something...). What I am saying is, I think at this early period of my career, I want to take advantage of working across the world before coming back, and I think it could be an amazing opportunity for my spouse's daughter.

In the end: If I was to say I would now have an international career for the rest of my life and would not be back in the U.S. for more than 2 years, would that mean I could never ever marry my spouse and have her live with me? That is a hypothetical, but my point is, it has to be possible...

[Ning 619]

Yes, I'm aware of the situation with the child. The law is that the father must sign if he has custody, but I do not think he legally does, at this point. If he does not, I think he would sign it.

Other than that, now after looking at various visas in African countries, it is clear that they all have special visas for dependents of temporary workers, and it says nothing about the dependents having to have a passport from the same country as the worker.

These things can be difficult & possibly different in different countries but it would be a good idea to check with the embassy in Colombia to make sure they would accept the custody agreement of the court.

If there is no problem having him sign then there wont be a problem. I hope that the case for the sake of the child.

[kennym 275]

These things can be difficult & possibly different in different countries but it would be a good idea to check with the embassy in Colombia to make sure they would accept the custody agreement of the court.

If there is no problem having him sign then there wont be a problem. I hope that the case for the sake of the child.

Guys, one factor is; the father's permission.. The place they check this is not the embassy.. In Colombia, it is at the airport on the way to the plane.. Make sure you have the documents to show DAS officials that the father has given his permission...

Kenny

Edited October 17, 2011 by kennym

[Richie Rich 70]

You probably need to wait until you are ready to live permanently in the US.

You can marry anywhere and the two of you can come back then to permanently live in the US.

An alien cannot become a citizen of the US (via marriage to a US citizen) until they have been in the US three years after issuance of a greencard.

Correction : An Alien can only apply for US Citizenship after 4 yrs 6 mths of being a Permanent Resident (Green Card ) .Check the USCIS website .

[kennym 275]

Correction : An Alien can only apply for US Citizenship after 4 yrs 6 mths of being a Permanent Resident (Green Card ) .Check the USCIS website .

Correction, Unless you're the spouse of a USC...

See USCIS Website... Click Here

In general, you may qualify for naturalization under Section 319(a) of the Immigration and Nationality Act (INA) if you

• Have been a permanent resident (green card holder) for at least 3 years
  
• Have been living in marital union with the same U.S. citizen spouse during such time
  
• Meet all other eligibility requirements under this section
  

Edited October 17, 2011 by kennym

[Ready to do it 101]

This should be the first thing you look into. I am almost positive that the law in Colombia requires the father to give permission. It is irrelevant who has custody. If the father says "No," then the kid aint leaving Colombia. It'd suck to go through the whole process of getting paperwork for them to go to Rwanda with you, or even the US and the father refuse to allow the child to leave Colombia.

Yes, I'm aware of the situation with the child. The law is that the father must sign if he has custody, but I do not think he legally does, at this point. If he does not, I think he would sign it.

[kennym 275]

This should be the first thing you look into. I am almost positive that the law in Colombia requires the father to give permission. It is irrelevant who has custody. If the father says "No," then the kid aint leaving Colombia. It'd suck to go through the whole process of getting paperwork for them to go to Rwanda with you, or even the US and the father refuse to allow the child to leave Colombia.

For the OP, this is true in Colombia... My wife and I dealt with this.. It doesn't matter who has custody... YOu will need to have the fathers permission, or proof he isnt around anymore...

You can fight this in the courts in Colombia, but likely you'll loose...

[nebodihome 0]

For the OP, this is true in Colombia... My wife and I dealt with this.. It doesn't matter who has custody... YOu will need to have the fathers permission, or proof he isnt around anymore...

You can fight this in the courts in Colombia, but likely you'll loose...

My fiancee said she thinks he will give the permission. Other than that, I think we could win in court. He is unemployed and a drug user, he abused my fiancee and their 3yr old daughter can verbally recall this. Now, the child will have an alternative to live with someone who can actually provide, and where she an get an education, and with someone who has already been giving financial support (I have steadily sent money and have proof of this) unlike her father. We can hire a good lawyer, he cannot.

And another route can be to agree the visitation schedule, since my fiance would likely travel back to Colombia at least once, but probably twice a year. They could officially change that schedule and get him to agree.

Lastly, if it is legal, we can always "buy him out" by paying him money so he gives permission. This may sound low-class, but my fiancee says he doesn't like being with his daughter, she doesn't like being with him and he misses visitation times.

[nebodihome 0]

Also, if the courts rule based on what is best for the child, even including the father-daughter connection, they would be insane to not let my fiancee relocate. It would give her daughter, who does not really like her father since he beat her mother, to one day a world class education and live in a stable and safe, two-adults-present environment.

[setherwyn 0]

1. every country has different migration rules, but i'm almost sure you can relocate with your wife (no matter nationality) in rwanda. i have a colombian frien living in china with her german BOYFRIEND, his company gave her a sponsorship. that is not a big deal.

2. the kid is an issue.

3. cultural shock is gonna be massive, we colombians are very attached to our land, food, and family, no matter if we are poor or rich, and rwanda is not the states, from here it takes 6 hours and 600 bucks to get colombia...i would suggest a 6 months try, if rwanda doesnt work, try to relocate, if you can not right now, then wait. a long distance relationship is hard, but it is not impossible, all of us have done it. i have to add that if you really really love someone, you would live under a bridge (i'm not comparing rwanda with a bridge, i'm just saying, and the idea sounds very cool, not like winter in minnesota ), but again, when a child is in the middle, the adventure spirit shrinks.

4. when the time to move to the states comes, start the US migration process, before that it is pointless.

good luck!!! and save a lot of money and patience , this process is expensive, long and annoying.

[setherwyn 0]

regardless the child, is gonna be way easier if the father resigns to his right whit her and you adopt her, if you are planing to move all over the world, is gonna be a pain in the butt always. if you are the legal father, problem solved.

[Ning 619]

regardless the child, is gonna be way easier if the father resigns to his right whit her and you adopt her, if you are planing to move all over the world, is gonna be a pain in the butt always. if you are the legal father, problem solved.

This sounds good but is very hard to do. Adopting a child is something that requires a lot of work, time & probably a lawyer. Check into it on line & you will begin to see how difficult this is.

[Ready to do it 101]

This will most likely end up being what happens. I have heard of this regularly, and I think it is pretty much your only alternative.

Everything you posted about who is best for the child, where can the child get the best education, financial support, etc. is irrelevant (I think). I am pretty sure that unless he is dead or unable to be found (and you will have to show signficant searching... private investigators, etc) it comes down to he either gives permission or he doesn't. I'm pretty sure the drug use and even if he were in prison is irrelevant. I could be wrong, but I think these are the things I have heard regarding this kind of situation.

Lastly, if it is legal, we can always "buy him out" by paying him money so he gives permission. This may sound low-class, but my fiancee says he doesn't like being with his daughter, she doesn't like being with him and he misses visitation times.