What if the K-1 beneficiary is showing some signs ...

[Sadlad 0]

Hello everyone.

I'm a US citizen who petitioned my fiance from the Philippines through K-1 visa.

Our current status is married and on the process of filing the I-751 or petition

to remove conditional status after she obtained her conditional resident alien

card almost 2 years ago.

Over the months since she received her resident alien card, she has changed a lot

and our relationship has taken a toll. Like a switch, after receiving her conditional

green card she has been fighting me on the most littlest things, in the most unrea-

sonable ways. She would also put my priorities in the backseat and would focus on

her relatives in San Diego and attend to their plans. She would ignore gifts and

good gestures from my family like she doesn't want to do anything with my family.

She has threatened to leave me before and she's verbally abusive (I would some-

times record her) eventhough I am doing my part as a husband and as a petitioner.

A lot has really come out. One of things that's disturbing me is she would lie or

deny things that happened, to hide her relative's racist ways. No respect of the

truth; she would tell a different story without regard to any of the witnesses'

account.

Somebody told me that after I file that I-751 and proceeded to remove the condi-

tional status, she can divorce me and she would retain her resident alien status,

getting the documentation that she wants from me. I just wanted to have a family

of my own, and I believe in "change". My question is: Is there a way to extend

her conditional status? Is there a better way to handle this where she would not

benefit from me (documentation-wise) if she decides to terminate the relationship?

Is the "Petition to remove Status" the point of no return?

Please help,

Sadlad

[NoneYa 73]

Reread what you posted:

she has been fighting me on the most littlest things, in the most unrea-

sonable ways. She would also put my priorities in the backseat and would focus on

her relatives in San Diego and attend to their plans. She would ignore gifts and

good gestures from my family like she doesn't want to do anything with my family.

She has threatened to leave me before and she's verbally abusive (I would some-

times record her)

It's okay to make a mistake but to have a family with this woman would be a disaster. Something is wrong. Seek individual counceling by an independent source.

You are blinded by love for this woman obviously. That is no way to live the rest of your life.

[Persepolis 5]

I have no experience in this area dealing with removal of conditions as I am just waiting for my NOA2.

But If it talks like a ducks, looks like a duck, and acts like a duck its probably a duck.

What I mean is, if you sit and look at this from a non-bias standpoint (NOTE: from what you posted that is) it is clear she is USING YOU until she can get on her own feet. Now I don't know your relationship nor your wife so I can only go on what you told me.

If I were you, I would sit long and hard and think about if she is really in love with you or in love with what you will give her? (ie resident alienship)

If the answer is the latter, I would tell the interviewer when she has her interview or contact USCIS and tell them you believe your fiance is using you for immigration purposes. I assume that is what the "two year residency" renewal is for, is to catch those who try to abuse the system. I wouldn't let her take advantage of you, so call USCIS or talk to a lawyer and see what your opitions are.

If I truly believed someone was using me to get their permanent residency, I would do everything in my power to let the USCIS know that that person is a fraud and married for immigration purposes and have her deported.

Again I can only go on what you told me and you need to sit and think long and hard about this, but in the end you can't let someone use you if thats what you believe she is going to do. I have heard cases where the woman completely changes and gets divorced and lives her own life, it happens you are and AMERICAN CITIZEN. In today's economy ANYONE would love to live here and prosper here especially if they are from a developing country.

Edited October 13, 2011 by Persepolis

[TBoneTX 45,918]

Si, man -- this:

she has been fighting me on the most littlest things, in the most unreasonable ways. She would also put my priorities in the backseat and would focus on her relatives in San Diego and attend to their plans. She would ignore gifts and good gestures from my family like she doesn't want to do anything with my family. She has threatened to leave me before and she's verbally abusive (I would sometimes record her)

You also said that she's lying, which is inexcusable, too.

These are not just red flags, but hurricane warnings. The verbal abuse alone -- and the reality that you've recorded her! -- means that there's no respect (let alone love) from her side. Marriage is a two-way street. I was married to something like this in a past life, and the 2-year marriage felt like 200. Even today, I struggle to describe the relief when I was freed from it.

That is no way to live the rest of your life.

Si, man (sigh, man).

She can remove conditions without you. Quit believing in "change" -- she has changed already, and she's showing you exactly how. My advice is to lose this -- and her -- at your earliest opportunity. Man up.

[generic_usc 2]

I would like to give you a very heartfelt reply, because I experienced something very similar, although the circumstances were different. It was so incredibly painful for me, and still difficult to talk about, but I found out the man I married, married me only because of his immigration woes and to avoid deportation. Of course many (neon?) signs were there along the way, but I tried to ignore them. In some sense I guess I felt I could "will" him to be the person he pretended to be, because, hey, that person was GREAT. I was in denial.

The unfortunate thing, is that we had a child together, all the while more and more lies were exposed, and that child has suffered in the process of all this mess, and suffered immeasurably.

To this day, I don't really even know who that person was. He had several names, I found out. He had children I found out about. The list is long, but, you get the idea.

I know these circumstances are different than yours, but at the core, the longer we take to see things objectively, and take a hard stand, the more we have to lose, including losing the chance of being with a real life partner who can hold up to their end of the bargain, in essence, just to be sincere. Some people just, sadly, aren't.

Your message touched my heart because I remember the very day it all changed with him, the contrast was sharp, and when he became a person I didn't recognize anymore, after he thought he had gotten what he wanted. I encourage you to take a cold, hard, look, as objectively as possible at the situation, and, if all the signs are there, cut it off as quickly and as tidily as possible, and certainly move forward and have a family with someone who is sincere and deserving of that level of commitment.

I truly wish you the best.

[Anh map 2,098]

Hello everyone.

I'm a US citizen who petitioned my fiance from the Philippines through K-1 visa.

Our current status is married and on the process of filing the I-751 or petition

to remove conditional status after she obtained her conditional resident alien

card almost 2 years ago.

Over the months since she received her resident alien card, she has changed a lot

and our relationship has taken a toll. Like a switch, after receiving her conditional

green card she has been fighting me on the most littlest things, in the most unrea-

sonable ways. She would also put my priorities in the backseat and would focus on

her relatives in San Diego and attend to their plans. She would ignore gifts and

good gestures from my family like she doesn't want to do anything with my family.

She has threatened to leave me before and she's verbally abusive (I would some-

times record her) eventhough I am doing my part as a husband and as a petitioner.

A lot has really come out. One of things that's disturbing me is she would lie or

deny things that happened, to hide her relative's racist ways. No respect of the

truth; she would tell a different story without regard to any of the witnesses'

account.

Somebody told me that after I file that I-751 and proceeded to remove the condi-

tional status, she can divorce me and she would retain her resident alien status,

getting the documentation that she wants from me. I just wanted to have a family

of my own, and I believe in "change". My question is: Is there a way to extend

her conditional status? Is there a better way to handle this where she would not

benefit from me (documentation-wise) if she decides to terminate the relationship?

Is the "Petition to remove Status" the point of no return?

Please help,

Sadlad

If the marriage is broken then divorce and move on. You cannot control your spouse's immigration status.

Divorce can be painful. But it is survivable.

Moved from K1 forum to Major Changes forum as the couple is past K1 phase.

Edited October 13, 2011 by Anh map

[Kiv 32]

What somebody told you is right, she can divorce you and retain her resident Alien Status.

There is no form to request to "extend" the conditional Status, USCIS does it smetimes (most of the times after I751 is filed) for their own administrative reasons but not because somebody asked for.

[Dave-n-Oksana 49]

I have no experience in this area dealing with removal of conditions as I am just waiting for my NOA2.

But If it talks like a ducks, looks like a duck, and acts like a duck its probably a duck.

What I mean is, if you sit and look at this from a non-bias standpoint (NOTE: from what you posted that is) it is clear she is USING YOU until she can get on her own feet. Now I don't know your relationship nor your wife so I can only go on what you told me.

If I were you, I would sit long and hard and think about if she is really in love with you or in love with what you will give her? (ie resident alienship)

If the answer is the latter, I would tell the interviewer when she has her interview or contact USCIS and tell them you believe your fiance is using you for immigration purposes. I assume that is what the "two year residency" renewal is for, is to catch those who try to abuse the system. I wouldn't let her take advantage of you, so call USCIS or talk to a lawyer and see what your opitions are.

If I truly believed someone was using me to get their permanent residency, I would do everything in my power to let the USCIS know that that person is a fraud and married for immigration purposes and have her deported.

Again I can only go on what you told me and you need to sit and think long and hard about this, but in the end you can't let someone use you if thats what you believe she is going to do. I have heard cases where the woman completely changes and gets divorced and lives her own life, it happens you are and AMERICAN CITIZEN. In today's economy ANYONE would love to live here and prosper here especially if they are from a developing country.

If you suspect her of using you, make an Infopass appointment and tell them everything you have told us here. Do not wait for an interview because she may be granted 10 GC without one.

[Chicagoguy 2 27]

If you suspect her of using you, make an Infopass appointment and tell them everything you have told us here. Do not wait for an interview because she may be granted 10 GC without one.

[Chicagoguy 2 27]

If you go to the Removal of Conditions forum page and leaf through past months filers you find almost no interviews required. If you want to stop this nonsense now contact immigration yourself.

[Sadlad 0]

If I truly believed someone was using me to get their permanent residency, I would do everything in my power to let the USCIS know that that person is a fraud and married for immigration purposes and have her deported.

Yes this seems to be the dilemma I'm having right now. Our local

Immigration Legal Services advised that either I file the petition

to remove the conditional status or not. If I don't, her residency

status expires. She goes home.

[Sadlad 0]

You cannot control your spouse's immigration status.

Moved from K1 forum to Major Changes forum as the couple is past K1 phase.

I cannot control her status yes, and I don't plan to. But I can deny her residency

by letting her conditional residency expire. The issue here is I'm expecting a nor-

mal marriage but the journey to get there seems to have taken a turn. I'm not the

irrational one. I'm the one on the "fixing mode".

[Sadlad 0]

It's okay to make a mistake but to have a family with this woman would be a disaster. Something is wrong. Seek individual counceling by an independent source.

You are blinded by love for this woman obviously. That is no way to live the rest of your life.

I hear ya.

[Deputy Purple 1,294]

Yes this seems to be the dilemma I'm having right now. Our local Immigration Legal Services advised that either I file the petition to remove the conditional status or not. If I don't, her residency status expires. She goes home.

If you don't participate in a Joint filing of ROC then she can divorce you and file herself.

If she's the kind that would then she could possibly just forge your signature on the ROC and still file jointly. If you don't want to support her ROC then I would suggest an InfoPass appointment with a letter giving USCIS written notice that you don't intend to support her ROC because you believe she entered the marriage for immigration benefits only. Then if she does this they may require an interview which would require your presence.

[VanessaTony 3,567]

Yes this seems to be the dilemma I'm having right now. Our local

Immigration Legal Services advised that either I file the petition

to remove the conditional status or not. If I don't, her residency

status expires. She goes home.

Um no actually. She can divorce you and and file for ROC based on a good faith marriage (by providing them with info such as joint bank accounts, proof you lived together, stuff like that). She doesn't need you any more. She might not know that but she doesn't need you.