Is it just me or has going through immigration really put wedding planning into perspective?

[Udella&Wiz 325]

It's really a personal thing - the folks on the other side can't imagine why you DON'T obsess over every detail. Neither opinion is right or wrong though...careful

I can say that 4 years later..even the day after...most of it doesn't matter. You're married! Some folks just don;t feel married unless they've had a big affair, some feel it's better to have something intimate with close family and friends.

I am hardly Kim Kardashian (who has been planning her wedding day since she was like 10 - supposedly) I always assumed I would be married but the details weren't something I worried about.

[Oksana & Max 94]

I am planning to do the simplest possible weddings with my best friends in the restaurant. No reception no LIMO (I have a DL). Just a simple court house ceremony and then restuarant. What is the most important my fiancee is totally agrees with me, and she also wants something really simple. And it is not becuase of the budget, just because of all the hassle to go thru.

[ateneaalexander 10]

Indeed, immigration is expensive but it's money well spent

Spending $20,000 for a single day however, is a little ridiculous when a nice meaningful ceremony could be done at a quarter of the cost.

wedding dress and sandals: 230 dollars

wedding rings 400: dollars

gas to drive to tybee island: 40 dollars

Photographer: 115 dollars

one night at a beautiful hotel by the beach: 200 dollars

ceremony at the beach: 0 dollars

spent the rest of my life with the love of my life:PRICELESS (L)

[Alex & Rachel 78]

I actually liked the visa process because neither Alex nor I wanted a big, expensive wedding, and the visa/visa expenses provided the perfect excuse for us to say to our families, 'no!'

And yes, weddings really can be cheap. We actually ended up with 60 guests (just Alex's family, and my immediate family, who managed to fly over), and the total cost was still under $2k. Although that was largely because we did things ourselves - I was up until 3 am making desserts, and then Alex was ferrying people to and from the airport at 6 am, while I did the decorations in the morning and ended up with fifteen minutes to get ready. So, uh, perhaps don't do that. Thank goodness we didn't have a photographer, because we both looked awful!

Food and alcohol was the most expensive - about $1k. Sandwiches, salads, desserts and cake. There was plenty to go around. Flowers - we ended up getting from Costco, 14 dozen really beautiful roses for under $200. Cabana rental (came with tables and chairs) was $300. Decorations were probably about $100, and the rings were $200.

My brother recently had a wedding that cost about $15k - and yet the food (burgers) was scant and guests had to buy their own drinks! But that was because 2/3rds of his budget had been spent on the dress, photographer and band, three things we didn't splash out on.

[TeapotGirl 66]

I agree. The money that went through the wedding could be good a start u money as a married couple. You have an elaborate wedding but you re broke. Bright idea.

[Britt♥Marco 9]

I agree. The money that went through the wedding could be good a start u money as a married couple. You have an elaborate wedding but you re broke. Bright idea.

Ever heard of family paying for the wedding? lol

[Britt♥Marco 9]

So far, my wedding is about $15k with about 150 people invited. This is MAINLY because of my parents, but I also don't feel like I should have to sacrifice wearing a beautiful dress and walking down an aisle at an amazing venue just because of this visa process. We set the date a good distance in advance so hopefully everything will be done in time. If not, ALL of the services (venue, cake, dj, photographer, etc.) can be moved with one phone call and we will NOT pay any extra fees since we explained all of this to them in advance.

Of course all I want is for my fiance to be here but i'm not sitting here stressing over it and saying- :i wont have this beautiful wedding because he might not be able to come here" ... i'm staying positive and believing that YES! he will be allowed in and everything will be fine and dandy. naive maybe, but we'll see.

and there's really nothing bad about having a big wedding... if its what someone wants then fine, it's what they want. who can judge and say whether it's right or wrong? it feels like people who want a wedding bigger than a few people & their fiance are being attacked here

Edited October 13, 2011 by Britt♥Marco

[worth_the_wait 12]

LMAO!!! I love this post!

This process that we are enduring has no doubt taught me what is most important which is being together forever. Everything else is just icing on the cake. After waiting as long as we have had to and stressing over forms and hidden meanings of our petitions status updates, we are craving quiet and simplicity.

BUT just like every petition is unique so are everyone's ideals, traditions and tastes. Soooo do what ya like and like what ya do!

Good luck with your planning.

Cheers,

Kim

Edited October 13, 2011 by worth_the_wait

[jlisakay 2]

we were lucky her son works at a top hotel so we got it cheaper but some asked to come and didn't turn up it was in the garden and nice reception inside DJ a friend and that was our wedding pressie family member did photos and as it was Friday night we got the bridal suite thrown in I ws lucky as my sister flew in from Australia and cousin from UK and 1 from Detroit and some of her side we have both done it before so no big thing but on the day magnificent and wonderful memories now wait for the Work permit and G/Card so we can get on with our lives together

[Mhayonaise 14]

This process that we are enduring has no doubt taught me what is most important which is being together forever. Everything else is just icing on the cake.

So true. At the end of the day it is living happily with your loved one forever that matters most. Hence, fancy wedding is not necessary..unless you really want to and your budget fits well

In my case we spent 2K everything and I so loved the outcome!

[NY_BX 397]

I am planning a small wedding and even if I had the money I wouldn't see myself having a big wedding or spending 30,000.

My budget is under $5,000 for everything ,as living in NYC doesn't help much .

My big splurge will be on a photographer and dinner for around 18-25 close relatives & friends.

Anyways At the end of the day you just want to tie the knot and be with your love one. MR & MRS

We're getting married at the Top of the Rock: $200. To that add the document marriage costs: $50. Tickets to the Top of the Rock: $21.50 each. My dress and his tux: $275. Rings: $250. Photographer: $150. (I work in the industry so I have a couple of friends that offered their services even free, but I believe in remuneration for work). Then I secured a basement at a bar in the city. They are only charging for the open bar for wine and beer: 100 guests= $1000. Other miscellaneous (beauty salon, rent a car, incidentials): $500. So, as it is, I'm well under 3K and I do not intend to spend more than that.... and I live in NYC!

There's absolutely no need to lose ourselves in unnecessary logistics. I receive emails from David's Bridal, The Knot, some other ####### and I delete. I've read photography packages of $3k. In this day and age, there's no need for that. Hint: go to a photography school and hire a a talented up-and-coming photographer. You'll be helping him/ her because they can put it in their resume/ portfolio and at the same time you'll be saving money.

i'm glad we all have our priorities straight!

[Rebecca Jo 1,962]

So far, my wedding is about $15k with about 150 people invited. This is MAINLY because of my parents, but I also don't feel like I should have to sacrifice wearing a beautiful dress and walking down an aisle at an amazing venue just because of this visa process. We set the date a good distance in advance so hopefully everything will be done in time. If not, ALL of the services (venue, cake, dj, photographer, etc.) can be moved with one phone call and we will NOT pay any extra fees since we explained all of this to them in advance.

Of course all I want is for my fiance to be here but i'm not sitting here stressing over it and saying- :i wont have this beautiful wedding because he might not be able to come here" ... i'm staying positive and believing that YES! he will be allowed in and everything will be fine and dandy. naive maybe, but we'll see.

and there's really nothing bad about having a big wedding... if its what someone wants then fine, it's what they want. who can judge and say whether it's right or wrong? it feels like people who want a wedding bigger than a few people & their fiance are being attacked here

You're only being attacked if you feel like you are. At least that's how I see it. It's just a convo.

Some of the folks in this thread have fiances in places where it costs a LOT of money just to visit. You and I were lucky with fiances in Europe. Not so much to fly there and the VWP makes it easy. Burning a lot of money on travel can really put a dent in the budget.

Plus, it's a tight-wad world now. It used to be OK to talk about how much money you spent on your house, your car, etc. Now it's fashionable to be cheap. So don't take it personal.

Ever heard of family paying for the wedding? lol

I've always been grateful I had a son!

Oh - and as I've said before - I looked damn good!

Edited October 13, 2011 by Rebecca Jo

[NY_BX 397]

You're only being attacked if you feel like you are. At least that's how I see it. It's just a convo.

Some of the folks in this thread have fiances in places where it costs a LOT of money just to visit. You and I were lucky with fiances in Europe. Not so much to fly there and the VWP makes it easy. Burning a lot of money on travel can really put a dent in the budget.

Plus, it's a tight-wad world now. It used to be OK to talk about how much money you spent on your house, your car, etc. Now it's fashionable to be cheap. So don't take it personal.

I've always been grateful I had a son!

Oh - and as I've said before - I looked damn good!

I don't think choosing to have a modest event, or an affordable car for that matter, is cheap in any way. I think is being reasonable, realistic and mindful of what's important. In my humble opinion, and this may be disturbing for some, I find it hard to swallow that someone has 30K, or 1 million, to spend on a wedding day and still can sleep at night knowing children worldwide are dying of hunger, for example. I know, I know, we can't change the world in one day. Yes, I also know that we all deserve to splurge for a craving or two with our hard earned money. Yes, I agree. However, there are extremes and this is what the kind lady that posted the thread is talking aobut: bringing into perspective what's really important.

[Rezq n Sarah 0]

We have everything ready, just waiting on the paperwork for Rezq to come over! We have invitations made (date & time blank), church lined out for the ceremony, reception prepared, bridesmaids dresses are in, my dress is in, cake paid for, food for dinner after marriage paid for, etc. etc. etc. I'm not a bling bling girl myself but it will be a very pretty wedding and it will be perfect because at the end of it, we will FINALLY be married. Today was the last "estimated date" on my Visajourney timeline and still no paperwork. I'm giving it another month before I start inquiring on the paperwork. But all in all, I'm at peace with it because I know that when God's timing is here, we'll be married. It is VERY nice having everything in place and ready at the drop of a hat so that when he does finally get here, we can just do it!

[paul_kay 31]

It's not that hard to have a nice wedding. As long as you're willing to spend time creating the details (talk about being a BUM for 3 months!) you can save a lot with the decorations and lots of other things as well! Be creative and have fun preparing for it! Invest on good photographs because they will last forever (and your marriage as well!). Not everything have to be expensive, just gotta be creative and practical!