Newbie Needs Advice

[DennisLThompson 0]

Hello everyone. My name is Dennis. I am going to Palawan in April of 2012 to meet Meriam. We wish to be married. I am not sure what is the best plan of action. I would prefer marrying her there in front of her family. I have heard the pro's and cons of this. I will need to secure a sponsor which I do not see as an issue. I am not a wealthy person. What are the experiences of some of you? What do you suggest?

Edited September 20, 2011 by DennisLThompson

[clueless55 18]

Don't marry in her country. Use the k1 visa. This gives you more time to spend with each other before you marry, you'll have 90 days from the time she arrives. There are various types of fraud surrounding marriage in the Philippines, also, along with screwed up documents, intentional, and otherwise. You probably want to read a forum like dragonladies.org before you go to the Philippines, and before you marry.

[Harsh_77 718]

All the frauds you are talking about and all the document issues you mentioned would be applicable during the K1 process as well.

So I am not sure if it adds any value in K1 over CR1.

From time perspective both visa would take approximate same time, on cost CR1 is little cheaper.

Based on your decision to get either married in her country or in US you will file for K1 or CR1.

[clueless55 18]

Too many of the asian ladies seeking a western husband are primarily looking for financial support....NOW. Marry them on the first visit, where they live, and they'll be expecting financial support from that point on, and usually also for the extended family. Using a K1, and limiting the financial support (If at all) until you are actually married filters out some of the ladies who are primarily looking for an income, and also gives you more time to spend with the lady, actually together, before you marry.

This isn't going to be a popular statement on this board, but most of the marriages are not entered into with much actual time spent together. A few weeks here.....maybe a second visit? I'm just as guilty. These marriages are risky, riskier than marrying some local person, unless this is a person you have only spent 7-14 days actually together, with. The time you spend online, emailing, or on the phone, doesn't really count for much in reality. You don't really know each other.

It can still work out if both people have the same agenda, and are willing to make it work. You can't be sure what the other person is really thinking, until it's too late.

Take your time. Don't be afraid to pull the plug on the process.

[kennym 275]

What are the experiences of some of you? What do you suggest?

Well you asked...

First thing I suggest, is be carefull

There is a sense of adventure and romance when going to a forreign country to meet someone who you've been commuicating with..

The second thing I suggest, is take your time..

Although you feel you feel there is a definite connection and you're ready to pop the question, relationships absolutely take time to develop.. there are many that will claim love at first site is possible and it happened to them, there are countless more that will tell you that their experience was a disaster.. Relationships take time to develop, to determine whether or not you compatible..

The third thing I suggest is; Use your head and not the other thing;

Be aware of the obvious red flags.. dont be blinded like I was in my first relationships..

The last thing is; keep your options open.

Dont make any commitments until your certain...

I get the sense you're young, so time is not a factor... Either way, all relationships are risky, but being smart and taking time to get to know someone in person is worth it in the long run... I know all your family and friends have told you this, but keep in mind, sponsering someone is a huge responsibilty especially if you are using a co-sponser... They can be held accountable for hasty descisions..

Aside from all that, you should enjoy your trip.. Take time to see the country and enjoy what they have to offer.. Dont simply consume yourself with just the questions of this relationship..

Save all your reciepts, boarding passes, passport stamps, and take lots of pictures..

Kenny