Have I been used?/Is she using me?

[haveibeenused 1]

I do not know what to do,and maybe I am TOO BLIND to see the REALITY but I need honest opinions/answers.

I met a girl in 2009 and after a few visits, we decided we would get married. So, in december of that year we got married. But its almost as if that same night,she changed. And here is what I will explain.

She became unemployed and wanted to start a business,but had no money, and I,out of good faith, sent her money to be able to start this business,and because those particular items were expensive there, I purchased them here at half the price to be able to help her out. I had already visited her twice at this time.

The night of our wedding,when we were meant to have the "first dance" as the newly wedded couple in front of 200+ people,she didn't want to, because she said she was "embarrassed" by it and did not want to do it, and I felt very bad inside because to me, I felt that it was the most important/intimate/special moment of our lives getting married. Well...the wedding went from 7:00-1:00 in the morning, and then after that, when we got home, I THOUGHT that we were going to have a "romantic" rest of the night,...but we never even "consumated" the marriage, instead...she just went to sleep. She just simply said "i'm tired, i'm going to bed"

So I felt that was very wierd that those 2 things occurred on our wedding night. Anyways, I left 4 weeks later because I had to return to keep studying.

And I returned in may of 2010. Everytime I go down there, I always make sure to bring her something. But when I get there, she asks me straight away BEFORE asking how I am "so what did you bring me?!?!?", and well, we get to her place, and so she asks me that again, and I give it to her, and as soon as I have given her the things that I have brought for her, its almost as if her interest immediately turns off.Like I don't exist.

So while I was down there, I also found out that a particular ex boyfriend from 2-3 years previous kept sending her emails with photos of them when they were together and she would keep them and I personally felt that it was very disrespectful since I am married to her. And only after begging her to get rid of them, did she get rid of them. She states that there is nothing anymore between them, but that day until the day I left in August 2010, I felt very unawkward with her.

So in DECEMBER of that same year (2010)I decided to take her to a place for vacation, and there was a beach there, we went for like 5 days. On the beach, everytime I tried to walk close to her to put my arm around her or hold her hand, she would just walk away, and when we ate together, there was nothing but this dead silence, and I would try to start a conversation with her, and she wouldn't talk at all. I did not know WHAT was wrong, I asked her and she said "oh nothing"

SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO, after this particular continual "strange behaviour" I asked her family/friends "Is she just like this with me?? or was she like this with all her ex boyfriends???"

And to my surprise, her brother said "She always cooked for all her ex boyfriends everytime they came over and had it ready for them"...and for me,she won't even make me a sandwich. I am the one that has to cook, if I dont cook...we don't eat. She is from a CENTRAL/SOUTH AMERICAN COUNTRY.

So, I also said to them "she ses she never stayed out late either",and immediately her freinds replied "noooo,she used to stay out until 4:00-5:00 in the morning in night clubs with her ex boyfriends dancing with them and partying"....but yet with ME on our wedding night and even after, I can't get her to dance with me(we have not even danced once yet as a couple) and she ALWAYS wants to go to bed early at like 10:00-11:00 everytime I'm there.

One day, she left open her email, and well, I saw ALOT of attatchment photos from a year or so previos before I was in her life. And when I opened up the photos, they were all still with her ex boyfriends, all smiling and happy,...but yet with me, there is not a single photo where she is smiling.

Whenever we talk, she only asks me "what" am I going to bring her, and "why" haven't I done her papers yet. Well...after the may 2010 incident, I started to become skeptical about even doing her papers because I thought "if shes like this now, I dont want to know what she'll be like if/when I bring her here to the U.S."

She never writes me....she never calls me. She can CALL ME FOR FREE WITH A MAGICJACK and NEVER calls me. When I call, it costs me between $5-$10 everytime I call. If I dont call, she won't call me. EVEN WHEN IM THERE IN HER COUNTRY, she will simply go to work from 9:00 in the morning until 8:00 at night, and I won't hear from her AT ALL during the WHOLE DAY NIGHT...nothing. And when she gets home, she won't talk to me, she'll just come home,...take a shower, eat,..and go to bed and I try to start a conversation with her, and she just won't even talk to me.

Whenever I have money,I'm good for her, whenever I don't have money,...I feel like im simply discarted straight away.

My dad died last year in October, and when he died, she didn't say/do anything,...instead she went off and played bingo with her friends.I tried to justify it saying "well, she didn't know him personally so she can't really feel anything?!",...but once again, my friends said to me "weather or not she knew him or not, your her husband and she still has to offer some type of emotional support"...(which she didn't)

What I'm TRYING TO GET AT HERE WITH EVERYONE, is that I PERSONALLY FEEL, that as her HUSBAND she should do EQUAL TO AND MORE than she has done with her ex boyfriends,...especially if I'm the "love of her life". But....her behavior seems to tell me otherwise. She just doesn't show any interest in me at all.

For our anniversary of 6 months I was in her country, and I took her out to eat, and I wanted to have a good night with her, instead, she wanted to go home by 8:00 and was in bed by 8:30...so I let THAT ONE GO.

For our 1 YEAR anniversary, i was there in her country. WELL, knowing what happened with the 6 month anniversary, I decided to go romantic, and walked from one side of her city to the other looking for rose petals, and candles, and that same night, I cooked for her.

When she came home, she didn't even look impressed, she ate what I cooked for her, then just went straight up stairs, took a shower and went to bed.

I WAS DEVASTATED!!!. I don't understand...I don't know what I've done wrong. When I explain this situation to a few of my friends, they say "she doesn't love you and is using you"

I was MEANT to go there NOW in June, BUT where I was meant to arrive is an extremely dangerous city, and I asked her "can you please come to this city to pick me up, I don't feel safe here alone to make it to your city"....knowing HOW DANGEROUS it is,..she said "no,because it costs money to pick you up"..

But yet she had a boyfriend from a few years previous in that SAME CITY who she would visit every week to two weeks. SOOOOO I said "well, if you can't even come here to pick up your own HUSBAND yet you can go visit some doochebag boyfriend, I'm not comming"...SO I didn't go there. I missed my flight and the money on the flight was wasted because it was non-refundable....

What do I do??? Am I being used?? I have spent a lot of time with her, ADDING UP ALL THE VISITS I have done there, it totals 1 year.

Help me please....Im at a loss for words. I really feel that "fixing her papers" to come here legally WONT change anything, if anything, it will make it worse, because of how she acts NOW and how shes acted for the past 2 years...help me please

[Louis&Venice 2]

I'm sorry to say but yes shes just using you ! Maybe she just want a visa to the states. I'm so sorry if im being judge mental but that's what how i feel, shes not the right girl for you. Pray and ask God for guidance so that you can do what needs to be done. Goodluck

[me@hubby 4]

I do not know what to do,and maybe I am TOO BLIND to see the REALITY but I need honest opinions/answers.

I met a girl in 2009 and after a few visits, we decided we would get married. So, in december of that year we got married. But its almost as if that same night,she changed. And here is what I will explain.

She became unemployed and wanted to start a business,but had no money, and I,out of good faith, sent her money to be able to start this business,and because those particular items were expensive there, I purchased them here at half the price to be able to help her out. I had already visited her twice at this time.

The night of our wedding,when we were meant to have the "first dance" as the newly wedded couple in front of 200+ people,she didn't want to, because she said she was "embarrassed" by it and did not want to do it, and I felt very bad inside because to me, I felt that it was the most important/intimate/special moment of our lives getting married. Well...the wedding went from 7:00-1:00 in the morning, and then after that, when we got home, I THOUGHT that we were going to have a "romantic" rest of the night,...but we never even "consumated" the marriage, instead...she just went to sleep. She just simply said "i'm tired, i'm going to bed"

So I felt that was very wierd that those 2 things occurred on our wedding night. Anyways, I left 4 weeks later because I had to return to keep studying.

And I returned in may of 2010. Everytime I go down there, I always make sure to bring her something. But when I get there, she asks me straight away BEFORE asking how I am "so what did you bring me?!?!?", and well, we get to her place, and so she asks me that again, and I give it to her, and as soon as I have given her the things that I have brought for her, its almost as if her interest immediately turns off.Like I don't exist.

So while I was down there, I also found out that a particular ex boyfriend from 2-3 years previous kept sending her emails with photos of them when they were together and she would keep them and I personally felt that it was very disrespectful since I am married to her. And only after begging her to get rid of them, did she get rid of them. She states that there is nothing anymore between them, but that day until the day I left in August 2010, I felt very unawkward with her.

So in DECEMBER of that same year (2010)I decided to take her to a place for vacation, and there was a beach there, we went for like 5 days. On the beach, everytime I tried to walk close to her to put my arm around her or hold her hand, she would just walk away, and when we ate together, there was nothing but this dead silence, and I would try to start a conversation with her, and she wouldn't talk at all. I did not know WHAT was wrong, I asked her and she said "oh nothing"

SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO, after this particular continual "strange behaviour" I asked her family/friends "Is she just like this with me?? or was she like this with all her ex boyfriends???"

And to my surprise, her brother said "She always cooked for all her ex boyfriends everytime they came over and had it ready for them"...and for me,she won't even make me a sandwich. I am the one that has to cook, if I dont cook...we don't eat. She is from a CENTRAL/SOUTH AMERICAN COUNTRY.

So, I also said to them "she ses she never stayed out late either",and immediately her freinds replied "noooo,she used to stay out until 4:00-5:00 in the morning in night clubs with her ex boyfriends dancing with them and partying"....but yet with ME on our wedding night and even after, I can't get her to dance with me(we have not even danced once yet as a couple) and she ALWAYS wants to go to bed early at like 10:00-11:00 everytime I'm there.

One day, she left open her email, and well, I saw ALOT of attatchment photos from a year or so previos before I was in her life. And when I opened up the photos, they were all still with her ex boyfriends, all smiling and happy,...but yet with me, there is not a single photo where she is smiling.

Whenever we talk, she only asks me "what" am I going to bring her, and "why" haven't I done her papers yet. Well...after the may 2010 incident, I started to become skeptical about even doing her papers because I thought "if shes like this now, I dont want to know what she'll be like if/when I bring her here to the U.S."

She never writes me....she never calls me. She can CALL ME FOR FREE WITH A MAGICJACK and NEVER calls me. When I call, it costs me between $5-$10 everytime I call. If I dont call, she won't call me. EVEN WHEN IM THERE IN HER COUNTRY, she will simply go to work from 9:00 in the morning until 8:00 at night, and I won't hear from her AT ALL during the WHOLE DAY NIGHT...nothing. And when she gets home, she won't talk to me, she'll just come home,...take a shower, eat,..and go to bed and I try to start a conversation with her, and she just won't even talk to me.

Whenever I have money,I'm good for her, whenever I don't have money,...I feel like im simply discarted straight away.

My dad died last year in October, and when he died, she didn't say/do anything,...instead she went off and played bingo with her friends.I tried to justify it saying "well, she didn't know him personally so she can't really feel anything?!",...but once again, my friends said to me "weather or not she knew him or not, your her husband and she still has to offer some type of emotional support"...(which she didn't)

What I'm TRYING TO GET AT HERE WITH EVERYONE, is that I PERSONALLY FEEL, that as her HUSBAND she should do EQUAL TO AND MORE than she has done with her ex boyfriends,...especially if I'm the "love of her life". But....her behavior seems to tell me otherwise. She just doesn't show any interest in me at all.

For our anniversary of 6 months I was in her country, and I took her out to eat, and I wanted to have a good night with her, instead, she wanted to go home by 8:00 and was in bed by 8:30...so I let THAT ONE GO.

For our 1 YEAR anniversary, i was there in her country. WELL, knowing what happened with the 6 month anniversary, I decided to go romantic, and walked from one side of her city to the other looking for rose petals, and candles, and that same night, I cooked for her.

When she came home, she didn't even look impressed, she ate what I cooked for her, then just went straight up stairs, took a shower and went to bed.

I WAS DEVASTATED!!!. I don't understand...I don't know what I've done wrong. When I explain this situation to a few of my friends, they say "she doesn't love you and is using you"

I was MEANT to go there NOW in June, BUT where I was meant to arrive is an extremely dangerous city, and I asked her "can you please come to this city to pick me up, I don't feel safe here alone to make it to your city"....knowing HOW DANGEROUS it is,..she said "no,because it costs money to pick you up"..

But yet she had a boyfriend from a few years previous in that SAME CITY who she would visit every week to two weeks. SOOOOO I said "well, if you can't even come here to pick up your own HUSBAND yet you can go visit some doochebag boyfriend, I'm not comming"...SO I didn't go there. I missed my flight and the money on the flight was wasted because it was non-refundable....

What do I do??? Am I being used?? I have spent a lot of time with her, ADDING UP ALL THE VISITS I have done there, it totals 1 year.

Help me please....Im at a loss for words. I really feel that "fixing her papers" to come here legally WONT change anything, if anything, it will make it worse, because of how she acts NOW and how shes acted for the past 2 years...help me please

honestly i feel sad w/ your story it seems you just being use.where she from anyway? but in that case maybe talk to her and tell her how you feel.but at the same time maybe dont start to process you have to talk to her,i dont think she's even inlove to you or appreciate you.shes sucks by the way..

[jkelly07 120]

get out of it leave her, the hand writing is on the wall.she is showing you she don't love you.wake up man.it needs to be a two way street for it to work,so sorry about that, you must love her a lot, but not her,time to forget her,she won't change,

[rodceasar 34]

As a man talking to another man... run fast and leave this marriage. I feel that this is only the beginning and there's alot more to this behavior that you probably had not yet found out...

[carolynhotstuff 252]

I think in your heart you already know the answer to the question you are asking. How can you work out a marriage with someone who won't even talk to you? You should file for divorce in the USA and move on with your life. My ex-husband also became cold and distant after we got married. He made my life hell. It does seem as if she only married you to get a visa. Most people that run these scams will at least pretend they love you until they get over here but she can't even do that for you.

I can tell from your post that you are unhappy and in a lot of pain over this relationship. Once you move on with your life you will feel better and God willing you will find someone that really loves you.

[Petersburg 5]

You answered all of your questions in your story....

[Amy_and_Victor 159]

haveibeenused, I'm sorry, but it obviously seems that she just using you. Being on your place, I definitely wouldn't do any paperwork to bring her to me.

[it's Victor from Russia]

[* Kristin * 49]

I am so sorry to hear all of this... don't bring her to the US. Get out of this "marriage." Find a woman who really loves you; there is one out there.

I do not know what to do,and maybe I am TOO BLIND to see the REALITY but I need honest opinions/answers.

I met a girl in 2009 and after a few visits, we decided we would get married. So, in december of that year we got married. But its almost as if that same night,she changed. And here is what I will explain.

She became unemployed and wanted to start a business,but had no money, and I,out of good faith, sent her money to be able to start this business,and because those particular items were expensive there, I purchased them here at half the price to be able to help her out. I had already visited her twice at this time.

The night of our wedding,when we were meant to have the "first dance" as the newly wedded couple in front of 200+ people,she didn't want to, because she said she was "embarrassed" by it and did not want to do it, and I felt very bad inside because to me, I felt that it was the most important/intimate/special moment of our lives getting married. Well...the wedding went from 7:00-1:00 in the morning, and then after that, when we got home, I THOUGHT that we were going to have a "romantic" rest of the night,...but we never even "consumated" the marriage, instead...she just went to sleep. She just simply said "i'm tired, i'm going to bed"

So I felt that was very wierd that those 2 things occurred on our wedding night. Anyways, I left 4 weeks later because I had to return to keep studying.

And I returned in may of 2010. Everytime I go down there, I always make sure to bring her something. But when I get there, she asks me straight away BEFORE asking how I am "so what did you bring me?!?!?", and well, we get to her place, and so she asks me that again, and I give it to her, and as soon as I have given her the things that I have brought for her, its almost as if her interest immediately turns off.Like I don't exist.

So while I was down there, I also found out that a particular ex boyfriend from 2-3 years previous kept sending her emails with photos of them when they were together and she would keep them and I personally felt that it was very disrespectful since I am married to her. And only after begging her to get rid of them, did she get rid of them. She states that there is nothing anymore between them, but that day until the day I left in August 2010, I felt very unawkward with her.

So in DECEMBER of that same year (2010)I decided to take her to a place for vacation, and there was a beach there, we went for like 5 days. On the beach, everytime I tried to walk close to her to put my arm around her or hold her hand, she would just walk away, and when we ate together, there was nothing but this dead silence, and I would try to start a conversation with her, and she wouldn't talk at all. I did not know WHAT was wrong, I asked her and she said "oh nothing"

SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO, after this particular continual "strange behaviour" I asked her family/friends "Is she just like this with me?? or was she like this with all her ex boyfriends???"

And to my surprise, her brother said "She always cooked for all her ex boyfriends everytime they came over and had it ready for them"...and for me,she won't even make me a sandwich. I am the one that has to cook, if I dont cook...we don't eat. She is from a CENTRAL/SOUTH AMERICAN COUNTRY.

So, I also said to them "she ses she never stayed out late either",and immediately her freinds replied "noooo,she used to stay out until 4:00-5:00 in the morning in night clubs with her ex boyfriends dancing with them and partying"....but yet with ME on our wedding night and even after, I can't get her to dance with me(we have not even danced once yet as a couple) and she ALWAYS wants to go to bed early at like 10:00-11:00 everytime I'm there.

One day, she left open her email, and well, I saw ALOT of attatchment photos from a year or so previos before I was in her life. And when I opened up the photos, they were all still with her ex boyfriends, all smiling and happy,...but yet with me, there is not a single photo where she is smiling.

Whenever we talk, she only asks me "what" am I going to bring her, and "why" haven't I done her papers yet. Well...after the may 2010 incident, I started to become skeptical about even doing her papers because I thought "if shes like this now, I dont want to know what she'll be like if/when I bring her here to the U.S."

She never writes me....she never calls me. She can CALL ME FOR FREE WITH A MAGICJACK and NEVER calls me. When I call, it costs me between $5-$10 everytime I call. If I dont call, she won't call me. EVEN WHEN IM THERE IN HER COUNTRY, she will simply go to work from 9:00 in the morning until 8:00 at night, and I won't hear from her AT ALL during the WHOLE DAY NIGHT...nothing. And when she gets home, she won't talk to me, she'll just come home,...take a shower, eat,..and go to bed and I try to start a conversation with her, and she just won't even talk to me.

Whenever I have money,I'm good for her, whenever I don't have money,...I feel like im simply discarted straight away.

My dad died last year in October, and when he died, she didn't say/do anything,...instead she went off and played bingo with her friends.I tried to justify it saying "well, she didn't know him personally so she can't really feel anything?!",...but once again, my friends said to me "weather or not she knew him or not, your her husband and she still has to offer some type of emotional support"...(which she didn't)

What I'm TRYING TO GET AT HERE WITH EVERYONE, is that I PERSONALLY FEEL, that as her HUSBAND she should do EQUAL TO AND MORE than she has done with her ex boyfriends,...especially if I'm the "love of her life". But....her behavior seems to tell me otherwise. She just doesn't show any interest in me at all.

For our anniversary of 6 months I was in her country, and I took her out to eat, and I wanted to have a good night with her, instead, she wanted to go home by 8:00 and was in bed by 8:30...so I let THAT ONE GO.

For our 1 YEAR anniversary, i was there in her country. WELL, knowing what happened with the 6 month anniversary, I decided to go romantic, and walked from one side of her city to the other looking for rose petals, and candles, and that same night, I cooked for her.

When she came home, she didn't even look impressed, she ate what I cooked for her, then just went straight up stairs, took a shower and went to bed.

I WAS DEVASTATED!!!. I don't understand...I don't know what I've done wrong. When I explain this situation to a few of my friends, they say "she doesn't love you and is using you"

I was MEANT to go there NOW in June, BUT where I was meant to arrive is an extremely dangerous city, and I asked her "can you please come to this city to pick me up, I don't feel safe here alone to make it to your city"....knowing HOW DANGEROUS it is,..she said "no,because it costs money to pick you up"..

But yet she had a boyfriend from a few years previous in that SAME CITY who she would visit every week to two weeks. SOOOOO I said "well, if you can't even come here to pick up your own HUSBAND yet you can go visit some doochebag boyfriend, I'm not comming"...SO I didn't go there. I missed my flight and the money on the flight was wasted because it was non-refundable....

What do I do??? Am I being used?? I have spent a lot of time with her, ADDING UP ALL THE VISITS I have done there, it totals 1 year.

Help me please....Im at a loss for words. I really feel that "fixing her papers" to come here legally WONT change anything, if anything, it will make it worse, because of how she acts NOW and how shes acted for the past 2 years...help me please

[haveibeenused 1]

I would also like to add, after much thought of not wanting to add it, but I will share it with everyone to let you's know and help me understand better my situation.....

We have sex (when I'm there) MAYBE ONCE every week to two weeks. And when we do, it lasts five minutes because she tells me "hurry up and finish". Like, we will start, and within 5 minutes, she will say "hurry up, finish already!!!"...

And I feel like I've been used or i'm some sort of prostitute. I feel really bad inside,and my self-esteem goes right down the drain,because that is something very intimate. I become afraid to even want to attempt it again with her out of fear of her saying that again which she usually always does.

When it does happen,she makes sure that it happens in the morning, to avoid doing it at night time with me.

When I leave to come back to the U.S...I know that it will be like 3 months before I will see her next, so the night before I leave, well, I want to make the most of it as possible knowing we wont see each other for a while, and well....it either doesnt happen at all, or it will happen for only 5 minutes and thats it.

And I KNOW what she was like with her ex boyfriends,because she would OPENLY tell me what she used to do with them. And me being her husband, she doesnt do the same+more with me, I feel really bad.

Like....she doesn't talk about having kids with me. BEFORE we got married she would, but its like as soon as we got married, the topic is like pure taboo with her.

She'll see me off at the airport,...and I don't know ***sigh***,I will be crying, and she is just there without any emotion at all in her face, like she doesn't care I'm leaving, and its been like this basically with EVERY SINGLE VISIT. Because I will constantly look back when Im boarding the plane,...and most of the time,she won't even stay to see it go, she'll just walk out and leave the airport.

I HAD a sponsor, but one day, the person that was going to sponsor her, came up to me and said "I dont feel right about sponsoring someone I dont even know and being responsable for that person for the next 10+ years." (and I hadn't even told him about my situation)

So I knew that I was most probably going to have to move to HER COUNTRY for a while until we could figure things out. I do have a job offer there,...and a good one, BUT I just simply don't see the point going to live there if Im going to be in that situation. If she was not like that, then of course I'd go in a heartbeat.

But I always feel like "why would I move there,just for her to treat me like some type of "friend" IF THAT, for just financial support.

She is in her mid 30's...and from a CENTRAL/SOUTH AMERICAN COUNTRY...which for me is EXTREMELY WIERD because I know how the culture is, and the women usually take VERY GOOD CARE of their men due to the culture,..... she however is the complete opposite.

I'm sorry if I'm bothering everyone,..its just that I can't understand WHAT I've done wrong,...everytime she's needed money, I've sent it to her in good faith, even if it meant I went hungry or without my basic needs. When im THERE in HER COUNTRY, I'd do everything possible for her,...I'd bring her food to her work because for some strange reason when I was there, she never came home to eat, but when i was not there, she would come home to eat.

Its hard, because when Im there,..the time is as most of you's know from experience, the time is SHORT, so you want to make the most of it. Well...when Im there, on the weekends instead of going out with me,...she just sleeps. And me??..well..bored watching t.v.

=(...Am I THAT BLIND??..am I THAT DUMB?? am I THAT STUPID?? have I been used that easily???

[rlogan 2,036]

It is not abnormal behavior. She doesn't love you.

[haveibeenused 1]

And YES, I have TRIED NUMEROUS TIMES to speak to her FACE TO FACE about this entire situation.....and over the phone, and all she ses is "the same thing again your talking to me about?!?!??!"...

And if I'm there, she'll either leave and won't come back for AGES and then when I FINALLY see her, she'll ignore me or if its over the phone,she simply hangs up.

Believe me, I've tried A LOT, probably because Im so blindly in love with her, but with her, its like she doesnt even feel the same, does not show any emotion.

Whilst Im there crying, she just sits there and doesn't care. Straight face,no emotion.

I really don't know HOW to let go. After all I have worked towards.

And I know that if I see her with someone new, I know its going to get me that annoyed and upset that she'd put in ALLLLLLLL the effort with the new person, that she didn't even do with me,...being her husband. =(

Edited September 16, 2011 by haveibeenused

[Enigma11561 336]

Sorry to be so blunt, but it sounds like you were thinking with the wrong part of your body when you entered this "relationship". And she knew it and took full advantage of it. You are being scammed, used,or whatever words you want to use. I suspect you knew this some time ago but your rose colored glasses prevented you from getting out sooner.

And this point you need to get out and get out now. No more trips. No more money. Nothing. Just one phone call to say goodbye, you are filing for a divorce and hang up. She will get upset because she is losing the money train so expect that to happen. But this is not a relationship and IT WILL NOT CHANGE. I feel sorry this happened to you, but you will be none the worse for wear in a short time.

[Dumb/Dumber 61]

And YES, I have TRIED NUMEROUS TIMES to speak to her FACE TO FACE about this entire situation.....and over the phone, and all she ses is "the same thing again your talking to me about?!?!??!"...

And if I'm there, she'll either leave and won't come back for AGES and then when I FINALLY see her, she'll ignore me or if its over the phone,she simply hangs up.

Believe me, I've tried A LOT, probably because Im so blindly in love with her, but with her, its like she doesnt even feel the same, does not show any emotion.

Whilst Im there crying, she just sits there and doesn't care. Straight face,no emotion.

I really don't know HOW to let go. After all I have worked towards.

And I know that if I see her with someone new, I know its going to get me that annoyed and upset that she'd put in ALLLLLLLL the effort with the new person, that she didn't even do with me,...being her husband. =(

I can honestly tell you that if you question that someone loves you, the answer is NO they do not. When someone loves you, you will not have to ask, you will know it. You are thinking you have done something wrong. You can not make someone love you. They either love you or they don't. There is someone out there who will love you.

Edited September 16, 2011 by Dumb/Dumber

[amerisian 5]

=(...Am I THAT BLIND??..am I THAT DUMB?? am I THAT STUPID?? have I been used that easily???

You're not dumb nor stupid, she is just crazy and taken love for granted. I believe you are a good guy and deserve to have a good and caring wife. PRAY and THINK about it how many times before processing her paper.