wedding plans

[T ♥ G 0]

for me i understand both of u sis, but ur fiance has a point u can save more if u use to have a simple wedding sis, just prepared a nice wedding here in Philippines where you came from.,That's our plan...God Bless..

[LoveLoveLove 18]

for the OP if your dream wedding is simple your fiance has nothing to worry about the expenses

tips:

1. if you want a catholic wedding, contact the local parish of your fiance and make arrangements of a very simple wedding (we are doing that right now, before i fly to US, we disclosed that we have to marry in 90 days upon my arrival, we just wanted to be blessed in the church, accept the sacrament of matrimony within the blessing of the Holy Eucharist, so no choir, no entourage, just his immediate family members will be there so that's less the invitation, after we just plan to have lunch at a local restaurant, or even just have bbq or cook something at home, just be sure you ask your fiance's local parish the things u need for the ceremony like baptismal cert., pre-cana (we did our pre cana here in PI, sacrament of confirmation etc)

2. if you want a wedding dress, you can have it made before leaving PI, if u want it custom made... but there are good selection of wedding dress in divisoria or even in local bridal shops, very cheap ones, u can evan have one for the price of $50 or less!

well, that's the only thing i can suggest bec those are the only two thing i dreamt of my wedding.. i want to have the blessing in the rite of matrimony, very small one with few counted guests (well i just hoped my parents would be there, but their love and blessing to our marriage is enough), i never wanted a big reception, just simple meal after the wedding..

my husband-to-be is not that too inclined of having a fancy wedding, but he told me, if i want the wedding my way, i have to go for it (he has no prob with my expenses for the wedding bec he knows im stingy like him also!) make sure your fiance knows what u want for the wedding..

[ascxvz 4]

i did want a very simple wedding (just to be memorable)...but its like he is into like a drive thru...i think simple and drive thru wedding has alot of difference, isn't it?

[Back2real 4]

I say go for your dream wedding on a budget and plan it all while you are waiting. Gives you something to do that is quite fun! Shoot I started planning the wedding the moment I got home after he propsed! Before I even sent of the petition I think. I just kept researching on the internet and eventually I found exactly what we both wanted and all he has to do is put on a tux answer a few questions and show up!

[Blumchen 0]

Have you considered doing the courthouse union, and then having the ceremony separately? that would give him time to prepare!

[del-11-03-2013 1]

Wedding in U.S is costly. Even though my husband can afford but he does not come from a big family. So, what we do is just have civil marriage in City Hall and hire professional wedding photographer. The pictures turn out very well and it is one of our memorable day for us. Maybe you can do the same. Here is our Civil Marriage in City Hall slideshow.

The next time you go back to your country, you can do your dream wedding. We went back to Malaysia recently and we had religious and reception ceremony. It only cost us $15,000 and we had 300 guests. I have to admit this is my dream wedding and I love it

[me@hubby 4]

i did want a very simple wedding (just to be memorable)...but its like he is into like a drive thru...i think simple and drive thru wedding has alot of difference, isn't it?

you were choosing between grand wedding and simple wedding thats what you struggle right?you know what i understand how every girl want the wedding of their dream but reality check no matter how simple wedding in states its still cost..so why not keep it really simple like get married first in city hall then when you get a job maybe you and your hubby will come back here in phil and do the dream wedding that you want..your family can join and all your closes friend and relative isnt that great?besides you have to talk to your hubby what he can only afford and you have to understand what he can give you for now..remember marriage is more important then wedding..be realistic sometimes..

[NY_BX 397]

i did want a very simple wedding (just to be memorable)...but its like he is into like a drive thru...i think simple and drive thru wedding has alot of difference, isn't it?

you can make a drive-thru wedding as memorable as a grand ball weekend event. Just make it fun and loving. There's no difference, you know why? because you'll still marry him.

One of the best weddings I went to was exactly that- a somewhat drive-thru wedding. They woke up early, went to central park and got married at sunrise. That's it. A couple of us woke up very early and accompanied them. Got married in jeans and t-shirt. Then, they went and had a great time in the city during the day. In the evening a couple of friends went to a restaurant that already had live music. And listen to this: everyone paid for their own food and drinks! Their wedding cake was a tower of cupcakes. I think they spent less than $1000. We're still talking about that event. It was awesome.

[mimie 2]

me and my fiance, happens to talk about wedding plans...well, he wants to get married as soon as i come down on the plane...well, i think that is so sweet of him to say that...i would definitely want to do that...but of course being a woman, i would wish for a nice wedding that is well planned and organized...i did somehow talked it to him but not directly...but he answered me in a way that i felt like our wedding day is like an ordinary day for him...because he wants it so simple...no preparations or anything...and i just dont know how to convince him to have a better preparation on our wedding day...well, i dont intend to be wed several times, so i am thinking of a having a nice one...i think he is worried about the money, expenses to get married so i told him, would u rather want our wedding one month after i come in USA? well, he retaliated then someone called from his office and our conversation hasn't really ended...I want a nice wedding...i want to feel that our wedding day is specially prepared...but it seems he wanted like a drive-thru...what do you think girls? VJ members and friends? am i asking too much? or what? Hope someone responds...any opinion is appreciated...

You deserve to be happy. There is absolutely nothing wrong with having a nice wedding. But also, you should know your fiance's financial capabilities, then you'll know the answer to your question if you're asking for too much..

[Amy_and_Victor 159]

mI want a nice wedding...i want to feel that our wedding day is specially prepared...but it seems he wanted like a drive-thru...what do you think girls? VJ members and friends? am i asking too much? or what? Hope someone responds...any opinion is appreciated...

It's Victor from Russia. We're with Amy planning very simple wedding - at her parents house or city hall, just with a few closest relatives and small family dinner. We will be in t-shirts, jeans and sneakers. We both feeling ourselves like we're already married in our souls and official wedding will be just getting some paper (marriage certificate) which will allow us to stay legally together in one country. We both don't want any posh stuff, a lot of guests, etc. So I think it's personal choice, and I'm very happy that we're with Amy on the same wave - we're not rich couple with bag of money and we both prefer to spend money for our household than for big "traditional" wedding.

May be you can try to find a compromise with your fiance if you really don't want simple wedding, and he doesn't want big wedding?

[Amy_and_Victor 159]

It's Victor from Russia. We're with Amy planning very simple wedding - at her parents house or city hall, just with a few closest relatives and small family dinner. We will be in t-shirts, jeans and sneakers. We both feeling ourselves like we're already married in our souls and official wedding will be just getting some paper (marriage certificate) which will allow us to stay legally together in one country. We both don't want any posh stuff, a lot of guests, etc. So I think it's personal choice, and I'm very happy that we're with Amy on the same wave - we're not rich couple with bag of money and we both prefer to spend money for our household than for big "traditional" wedding.

May be you can try to find a compromise with your fiance if you really don't want simple wedding, and he doesn't want big wedding?

I love you, Sweetie!

I have to agree with my wonderful fiance, who in my soul is already my husband ...it's not all about the wedding day. Do you want to be a wife, or do you want to be a bride? Do you want a marriage, or do you want a wedding? The two are different. You're a bride for one day, and the wedding is just one day, but you're his wife and in a marriage with him for a lifetime. Try to consider that he might want to save money for important things for the future. I'm really just not a girly girl - I of course have feminine aspects of myself - but I've never fantasized about the perfect wedding like a lot of women grew up doing. I also never liked Barbie or princess-themed anything growing up, so I guess I just never fell for the hype. I'm glad that me and Victor both want a simple wedding, because the legal aspect of the marriage, to us, is just a way to legally allow us to considered husband and wife. We already are husband and wife in our hearts. We if course want to include close family and celebrate, but in a relaxing way. I honestly feel that anyone who wants to get married should already feel this way about their significant other - you should feel already married before the ceremony. That's just my opinion, but I feel strongly about it.

I think you and your fiance need to find a way to be on the same page. The entire process to bring you to him and then apply for AOS, and then later citizenship, is quite expensive. Me and Victor decided on a simple wedding together, so it was easy for both of us because we both don't want the stress, and we want to save money to do all the future paperwork because you still have to deal with USCIS for a long time and pay more fees for future petitions, which are not cheap, and we both hate formal-wear and fancy stuff, so it was easy for us to come together on our wedding plans. I'm not saying you absolutely shouldn't get to have a wedding like you want, I'm just saying try to think more long-term into the future. A wedding is only one day. I think as young girls we've got the "fairytale wedding" notion shoved down our throats...but as someone before mentioned...is the marriage itself already like a fairytale in real life? If your love feels like a fairytale and you feel like you're floating on cloud 9 when with your love, if you feel like you can't live without each other, then you shouldn't need a big wedding to feel happy. Sorry if my opinions on this matter are strong, I just feel that 99% of females are brainwashed about how important the wedding day is, when it's the rest of your life together that's more important. There are ways to have a wedding without spending too much money - you could have something in-between. When talking with your fiance about it, try to meet him halfway and make compromises - don't insist on getting your way 100%, because true compromise is when a couple works together to find a good solution to a problem they're having, not when one person "wins" because the other gave up.

[Vicky and Larry 27]

You guys can do both. You can get legally married in a civil wedding at the courthouse soon after you arrive in the States. Then you can have a big wedding ceremony in the church later on.

That's exactly what we plan on doing. Have the civil ceremony asap so that we can get on with AOS and such. And, then we are going to have our own blessing some months later.

[ascxvz 4]

TO ALL OF VJ MEMBERS WHO REPLIED AND GIVEN THEIR SUGGESTIONS...IM SO VERY THANKFUL FOR ALL OF YOUR INSIGHTS ON THIS MATTER...I DO APPRECIATED ALL YOUR COMMENTS AND SUGGESTIONS. I WAS SO ENLIGHTENED BY YOUR THOUGHTS...I THINK WE REALLY NEED TO TALK AND COMPROMISE ON WHAT EACH OF ONE WANTS AND CAN AFFORD TO DO. LOVE THIS SITE

[extremerecluse 32]

me and my fiance, happens to talk about wedding plans...well, he wants to get married as soon as i come down on the plane...well, i think that is so sweet of him to say that...i would definitely want to do that...but of course being a woman, i would wish for a nice wedding that is well planned and organized...i did somehow talked it to him but not directly...but he answered me in a way that i felt like our wedding day is like an ordinary day for him...because he wants it so simple...no preparations or anything...and i just dont know how to convince him to have a better preparation on our wedding day...well, i dont intend to be wed several times, so i am thinking of a having a nice one...i think he is worried about the money, expenses to get married so i told him, would u rather want our wedding one month after i come in USA? well, he retaliated then someone called from his office and our conversation hasn't really ended...I want a nice wedding...i want to feel that our wedding day is specially prepared...but it seems he wanted like a drive-thru...what do you think girls? VJ members and friends? am i asking too much? or what? Hope someone responds...any opinion is appreciated...

We went the court route last month. If you have the cash and time, go ahead and plan that BIG Wedding. We achieved the same results in three hours without any pressure or headache and little out of pocket expense. Of course this was the 2nd go-around for both of us.

[Joyce and Chris 1]

If your fiancé can't make you happy on that special day, why get married??? I may seem arrogant but that's just because I know what I want..anyway, a wedding is all about the bride..Hahaha

Me and my fiancé we didn't plan the wedding coz we end up arguing at first..Lol ! Until I let him decide of his plans of our wedding..if she makes me happy or hate him the rest of our life..Hahahha!!! Btw, it's really depending on what you both feel.it's a matter of compromise coz my fiancé explain it to me can't have a big wedding within 90 days...sOo true

Goodluck everyone!!!