Unsuccesful journey

[Flaco Bello 0]

We had been having trust issues for months, break up and make up. I insisted but this time I am not... she said the magic words, "I do not love you and do not want to be with you". That is what I needed to hear! This is the end of a long and difficult journey. All in vain, but its all good; I learned a lot about myself and what I really wanna do. Awesome, hurtful but enriching experience. I am stronger now and ready to move on. I am the beneficiary and sacrificed a lot (no need to explain, we all had to do this so you know what I am talking about) but I have faith that God will reward my efforts at least twice. May love and trust be with all other couples. Good luck and may God approve your cases in a timely manner. Our case is closed. I am not going to be visiting the site often, so long everyone, Thanks for your support and advice.

Sincerely yours, Flaco Bello

My mistake... I am not the beneficiary... I meant to say petitioner.

[Aya820 33]

I am really sorry to hear things have not worked out for you. But I believe it is good that you have recognized that this journey (life) is a learning experience, and that you will take what you have learned for use in future endeavors. Hopefully this has not hardened your heart because there is someone waiting on the horizon for you that will love you for you and when it is time you will meet.

[Samantha78 117]

We had been having trust issues for months, break up and make up. I insisted but this time I am not... she said the magic words, "I do not love you and do not want to be with you". That is what I needed to hear! This is the end of a long and difficult journey. All in vain, but its all good; I learned a lot about myself and what I really wanna do. Awesome, hurtful but enriching experience. I am stronger now and ready to move on. I am the beneficiary and sacrificed a lot (no need to explain, we all had to do this so you know what I am talking about) but I have faith that God will reward my efforts at least twice. May love and trust be with all other couples. Good luck and may God approve your cases in a timely manner. Our case is closed. I am not going to be visiting the site often, so long everyone, Thanks for your support and advice.

Sincerely yours, Flaco Bello

My mistake... I am not the beneficiary... I meant to say petitioner.

Unfortunately I can empathize with you. My husband and I have been rocky, also due to trust issues. Not that either one has done anything wrong but, damn...it's natural to feel this way when you live in a different country from your significant other. It's been a very difficult last 2 months for me. He was reluctant to come here, without any friends, feeling scared about whether we would argue a lot or if I would abandon him (which is so absurd) but I constantly reassure him that would never happen.

I understand you are at your wits end with this and believe me....I completely understand.....but you've gone so far...and if you stop now you can't turn back again without either a very bad outcome or another long and chaotic and expensive headache. I'd give it some time. Think about it once you don't feel angry anymore.

I know it feels so aggravating when they just cannot comprehend how much sacrifice in every way we make for them during this process. That's my biggest argument. I honestly think that, because they live in another country and have been raised from day 1 to think much differently than we do (regardless of how common our nationality/race is) ..... there will always be some issue with them understanding how we feel and how we live. They truly do not get it. Its not a great thing but....if that's the worst quality then I have to say, I'm willing to take that over many more worse qualities I've come across from previous partners in my life.

I think your fiances comments were made in anger........

Please.....just take some time.....think first.

Edited September 5, 2011 by sam&jensi

[Mrs. Lantigua 6]

I know it feels so aggravating when they just cannot comprehend how much sacrifice in every way we make for them during this process. That's my biggest argument. I honestly think that, because they live in another country and have been raised from day 1 to think much differently than we do (regardless of how common our nationality/race is) ..... there will always be some issue with them understanding how we feel and how we live. They truly do not get it. Its not a great thing but....if that's the worst quality then I have to say, I'm willing to take that over many more worse qualities I've come across from previous partners in my life.

I think your fiances comments were made in anger........

Please.....just take some time.....think first.

I'm so sorry to hear this but it was best to hear it now then go through the process and hear it when she's in the US. I am also having it rough with my husband. We mutually decided to give each other time (no calling each other 9-10 times a day) and accomplish what needs to be accomplish before our interview. It's not because of trust issues or anything like that...what I think it is that we are both stressed out about our personal problems that we tend to take it out on each other. Luckly we do not disrespect each other or have said anything to each other that we may regret. One thing I love about him is if things escalated he will say "Let's talk some other time" and things are left alone.

Sam&jensi

I am soo glad my husband has a compadre that been here for 3 years and at times will have a conference call. There are things that my husband will have doubts about and his compadre will tell him how it is here and what to expect which is great cuz now he knows I'm not talking out of my a$$

[Samantha78 117]

I'm so sorry to hear this but it was best to hear it now then go through the process and hear it when she's in the US. I am also having it rough with my husband. We mutually decided to give each other time (no calling each other 9-10 times a day) and accomplish what needs to be accomplish before our interview. It's not because of trust issues or anything like that...what I think it is that we are both stressed out about our personal problems that we tend to take it out on each other. Luckly we do not disrespect each other or have said anything to each other that we may regret. One thing I love about him is if things escalated he will say "Let's talk some other time" and things are left alone.

Sam&jensi

I am soo glad my husband has a compadre that been here for 3 years and at times will have a conference call. There are things that my husband will have doubts about and his compadre will tell him how it is here and what to expect which is great cuz now he knows I'm not talking out of my a$

We're in the same boat. We both are financially stressed to the max and tend to get an attitude with each other. We also decided to give each other a little space. We were talking too often and it just wasn't beneficial. Now we're down to 1, 20 min convo a day and maybe a few texts. Its wearing on me so much and its hard to concentrate on anything in my life. Like your husband, I tell my husband that we should talk later...and usually that works well.

Also, since the only person my hubby has here is his douchebag father to completely jade his views on the US, he doesn't have anyone reliable to talk to about this upcoming life transformation. I'm sure it's scary.....I can only imagine this situation vice versa. Sometimes I feel bad for even wanting him here, even if he is my man, because I'm removing him from everything he ever knew. I feel selfish. All in all....its just a rough time and I cant wait until its over :/

Edited September 5, 2011 by sam&jensi

[Aztec&Taino 144]

Flaco Bello,

I am sorry things did not turn out okay for your relationship. Yet, I congratulate you for having the courage and the wisdom to walk away. It is better to stop now and accept your losses (time, money, heartbreak, etc.) than to continue a deep end... I would suggest that you contact USCIS and inform them of your wish to withdraw the petition. It is better to leave a clean slate and cancel the process now rather than missing the interview date.

Best wishes

[Flaco Bello 0]

Ok I ve been away for some days... I need emotional recovery from this process, trying to stay away from everything related to her. Well, about canceling I already now the process... like I said above, we ve been going through blame game and make up-break up since April. I will definitely send a cancellation letter to Department of State because USCIS does not hold the case anymore. Also, (updating you guys) we texted each other and told things that were being held back before and honestly... broken, totally broken probably since the beggining... She said I never loved you... I figured out by her behavior she didnt and didnt give a damn. But you know, I am Dominican myself and I can detect Dominican trickery easily... it was a fraud. She lied to me, managed to hide it some months but could not resist to hide her true self long enough... Ufff, inhale-exhale...ahhh...all right, got it out of my system! Truth will prevail always. I am enlisting in the military and foreign influence (in this case sponsorship of an alien) isnt beneficial, definitely cancelling. I lost a lot because of her and now my enlisting could be affected. I mean... I wished this never happened. Dont regret, but I would have been in the military by now.

[TBoneTX 46,172]

Dont regret, but I would have been in the military by now.

It's good that you found out about this when you did, si man -- it's saved you a lot of time. One path has ended, but another (the military) is apparently about to begin. All the best, si man!

[Flaco Bello 0]

I finally withdrew the petition through email and fax. I have had my closure. The truth came out and I am going back to where I wanted to be before I met her. I am still on time and ready! Good thing I found out early rather than later. Thanks everybody! Much love and peace in your respective journeys.

[TBoneTX 46,172]

I finally withdrew the petition through email and fax. I have had my closure. The truth came out and I am going back to where I wanted to be before I met her. I am still on time and ready! Good thing I found out early rather than later. Thanks everybody! Much love and peace in your respective journeys.

Good for you and the same to you, si man.