Considering divorce but don't want to ruin her life

[Throwaway12345 0]

So me and my wife have been married for almost two years, and things aren't going so good. She's a scot I'm an american, and we've been going through the CR-1 visa route. Things seemed to be going real well, but now not so much. I don't think she's cheating on me, but the amount of time she spends away from home I'm starting to suspect, but what it really boils down to is we just don't get along anymore.

My marriage seems to be over we've started doing counselling sessions but those aren't helping, but we're still over a year away from getting her status changed to permanent resident. She's wanted to live in America for a long time, way longer than she's known me, her family is just god awful and she can't go back to them in scotland. All her life is here in the States. I don't want to be with her anymore, but I don't want to ruin her life either.

She has a friend who lives in a different state who can offer her a job and a place to live. We've talked many times about her moving out there. If she does that is our process screwed?

Is there some legal recourse that allows too people who've fallen out of love, to finish up with the tail end of their process? Or is there any way we can just not mention it to the Visa people and have things still work out for the best.

Any advice would be amazing, I am completely clueless as to what to do.

[NigeriaorBust 4,087]

If the marriage was valid and it seems it was from your story she can remove conditions even if you divorce. It is best if the divorce is final when you file so maybe sooner is better than later.

[Steph1988 11]

Sorry to hear that, is she IN the us just now? i dont think you can lie your way through the next 2 years of the process as you do have to show proof of 2years as in joint bank statments when u adjust after 2years, distance an time is a killer, trust me i no, im sorry things are bad, i will pray for you, loves never lost even in its last breath, good luck

[Harpa Timsah 13,258]

You say you are a year away from being a permanent resident. Do you mean that she is a conditional resident now? She can remove conditions on her own if you divorce. She will just have to show that she married in good faith.

[Done--Really 331]

Steph asked the most important question--is she here now with a green card, or if not, exactly where is she and where are you in the green card process??

[Throwaway12345 0]

She got her green card, and her conditional residency.

We both thought that it took two years for the conditions to be removed, but it sounds like it doesn't have to. What would showing that the marriage was in good faith even entail? I thought we did that at the interview.

[Harpa Timsah 13,258]

She will file I-751 with a request for waiver of joint filing due to divorce. She can file as soon as the divorce is final, if that comes before the 90 days period preceding the expiration of her GC. She will also show proof of co-mingling etc for the period while you were married. It's a fairly common occurrence. I'd check out the I-751 forum and you'll find lots of info there. Hopefully a mod will move this post.

[Done--Really 331]

Here is the general description of divorce before the two years have lapsed--it is not all inclusive in its description of good faith--it is only pointing out the two easiest proofs:

When permanent residence is granted conditionally to an alien spouse, that conditional permanent residence may be terminated within two years from the date permanent residence was granted if the marriage has been terminated through divorce. This rule also applies to the child of the alien spouse who obtains his conditional permanent residence based on the marital relationship of his parent. In other words, the general rule is that divorce terminates conditional permanent residence. Nevertheless, in this scenario, it is possible for the alien to obtain a waiver of the termination. A waiver of the termination is granted to the alien if the alien can show that the marriage was a union in good faith and the alien was not at fault for his failure to file the joint petition to remove the condition. Generally speaking, when the conditional permanent resident can show that the marriage was entered into in good faith, it is presumed that he was not at fault for failing to file a joint petition. Two ways to show that a marriage was entered into in good faith are proving that the couple had a child together and producing evidence that the couple owned property jointly.

[bigdog 376]

So me and my wife have been married for almost two years, and things aren't going so good. She's a scot I'm an american, and we've been going through the CR-1 visa route. Things seemed to be going real well, but now not so much. I don't think she's cheating on me, but the amount of time she spends away from home I'm starting to suspect, but what it really boils down to is we just don't get along anymore.

My marriage seems to be over we've started doing counselling sessions but those aren't helping, but we're still over a year away from getting her status changed to permanent resident. She's wanted to live in America for a long time, way longer than she's known me, her family is just god awful and she can't go back to them in scotland. All her life is here in the States. I don't want to be with her anymore, but I don't want to ruin her life either.

She has a friend who lives in a different state who can offer her a job and a place to live. We've talked many times about her moving out there. If she does that is our process screwed?

Is there some legal recourse that allows too people who've fallen out of love, to finish up with the tail end of their process? Or is there any way we can just not mention it to the Visa people and have things still work out for the best.

Any advice would be amazing, I am completely clueless as to what to do.

She can stay, only you know when over is over. Can't lie to them for next two years.

[Channah&Aaron 51]

; So, she has a GC and yall got married in good faith, she can remove conditions on her own.

Good luck

[Throwaway12345 0]

Hey I posted on the CR-1 forum and they sent me here.

My marriage has been going downhill for some time. It's reaching the breaking point. Her family in Scotland is absolutely despicable, but they're her only option back in Scotland, and I wont send her back to them, regardless of whats happening to us.

My wife is a Scot, we've been together close to 3 years and married a little over 2. She got her conditional residency green card last June.

We both thought that we had to wait two years to remove the conditions on her green card, but they're telling me she can have the conditions removed after a divorce. I don't want to really confront her with divorce unless I have all the details about this.

What would she need for the I-175. People said owning property or having children was what they really wanted in that situation, neither of which apply to us. We're on a lease together for an apartment, and we have a joint bank account. We've still got the photo album we did for her first interview, plus the new ones we've been putting in there, a few affidavits of support, but that's it. Is it enough?

[Brit Abroad 166]

In terms of evidence, I'd look back through your AoS packet for what you provided as proof of being a genuine couple and pull out more recent versions of the paperwork. You can't provide what you don't have. What about joint ownership or insurance for cars, medical, home insurance?

All she needs to do is prove that the marriage was genuine and, let's be honest, Scotland doesn't have a huge fraud rate in the first place so it shouldn't be that difficult. If you've been church members, what about seeking an affidavit from your clergy stating that your relationship was real, but has sadly deteriorated to the stage it's no longer what either of you wants? If you'll be helping her with the divorce and submitting the paperwork, a letter from yourself stating it may also be beneficial. Who better to confirm that the relationship existed than an ex-spouse?

Kudos to you for being such a gentleman in this situation.

[Casprd 167]

Whatever you do, never ever ever lie to the government about anything in the process. Even lies by omission will follow you and her forever. You have options where she can remove conditions on your own. It sounds like it is a fairly amicable breakup and you will support her ROC on her own. Last thing you want is to try to hide things and then years down the road something comes out and her green card/residency/citizenship is revoked (read about the two immigrants who had been here 25 years and didn't state they were married before coming to the US).

[Deputy Purple 1,294]

What she needs is to prove that she entered the marriage in good faith. For this the Co-habitation & co-mingling of finances seem to be the "big" Items and you have those covered.

[pasaway na angel 2]

I saw your other post in the IR1/CR1 forum and you mentioned about starting marriage counseling. If your marriage still ends up in divorce and you still want to help her with the removal of conditions, you can include a documentation of your marriage counseling sessions as part of proof of marriage entered in good faith. Since this will show that you did try to make the marriage work but it unfortunately did not go well.

I am hoping for the best for both of you. Good Luck!