I am pregnant by my husband. He wants me to have another abortion...

[timelena 0]

I am a recent immigrant, so I don't know a lot. But it seems to me that the welfare system is rather good here. I've been to Woodland Wayfarer Center (a work-related visit), and, boy, I wish I had a house like that! They say they will provide food and shelter to, basicly, anyone who needs it for up to 6 months, but would prefer to move the person further to organizations who try to solve the person's problems (e.g. substance abuse) and help him/her find a job.

My question is:

Is it possible for a pregnant woman to have nowhere to go and nothing to eat? What about a mother and a baby?

I hope that the State will care about them: provide low-cost or no-cost housing, health care, food stamps. Where should one go to get all these if needed? Does anyone know???

[EBONY_SEAN 1]

i understand what you are going through but i think im missing some info. if your 20 years old and a

student and working partime how will you care for the baby? not to sound harsh but just think about it. was this a surprise pregnancy for you or did you plan it. sound realy like it a bit much for you at 20, new in the country, a student and a partime worker.

... but I just cannot do it. It's was very hard for me emotinally when I 1st aggreed to have an abortion, to save our marriage. It was not I wanted to do but I was forced by him. He was telling me that If I decide to have the child he is "not willing to put up with this" and I would be left on my own. He would get divorced with me. I was being blackmailed, if I dont agree to have an abortion it's going to be over between us.

So I just did beacuse I wanted to be with him.

Now it happened again. I am pregnant by him, and he said he is going to file for separation and send me back to Poland IF I decide to keep it. He does not want the child to be born in the U.S. as he would be forced to be legally obligated for him/her. If I decide to abort the baby "we can start everything over again". Which gives the proof of mentally abused by him.

During past two weeks I have ended up 4 times in the hospital because of the stress after each argument and some pregnancy complications. Some person I have talked to in the hospital told me that it's a family abuse to blackmail a person to do something against her will.

I came to the U.S. being a K-1 visa holder September last year, we got married and I've recieved my conditional green card around April this year.

My question is that, is my husband able to kick me out of the country if he files for separation/divorce or apply for removal of my conditional gren card?

I am a student over here, I have just started school, and a part time job. I do still need the finacial support until I can stand on my own. Would I be able to count on that?

I have talked to one of my friend, and he said it is a pure abuse towards me. He suggested contacting a lawyer to see what can be done about it. He said that my husband is not able to send me back to Poland, yet I can sue him for the "family abusing".

I want my child to be born in the U.S. and he/she has more opportunities in this country. If my husband sends me back to Poland I have no guarantee that he would pay me for the child given he/she was born in there.

Do I have any rights here? Can he just do that to me?

Please help me!

Pauli.

Is he on crack?? he must be high on something. What does he think would happen when he was doing jumping jacks on you without protection?? You can keep the pregnancy and if he files for divorce, you can file for a waiver from USCIS and slam his butt with Child support once you have the baby. He must be outside his mind!!!

[Killer_Clown_2009 0]

Dan...

what she said was

Exactly, which is why a MAN can NEVER know what it's like to carry a baby, and should NEVER suggest a woman can give up a baby she's carried 9 months as if it's the simplest thing in the world.

which I completely agree with, btw.

I was not paraphrasing, I was repeating in case you missed it, because it seems you did.

You were paraphrasing.

You did not repeat exactly what was said. Therefore you paraphrased it.

So no, I didn't miss anything, only that you seemed to feel the need to explain someone else's post, and then criticized someone else for doing the same thing.

Sorry, but it seems my attention to detail is quite a bit more accurate than yours.

Definite

-- Dan

Who cares - if you must argue, at least make it interesting.

[rebex05 1]

Gosh I dont know how to thank you!!! I guess there's hope for me.

I tried contacing a family lawyer and I told her about my case, but she said she can help me fight for the child support. I dont know if family abusing is something they do, I meant divorce because of that.

This case include a little bit of family matter as well as immigration. I am a bit confused about looking for a lawyer that I should contact.

I am 20 years old, I have just got a job in a retail store and I still go to school part time (I live in NJ, btw. ). All I could be making working full time is about $ 15 000 a year. It would be hard but I think I could handle it.

I am very greatful that there are many good people everywhere that are willing to help me out!

Thanks!

Paulina

I do not have much helpful information to give you, but just wanted to tell you that I am praying for you. I know that you will be able to make it on your own and as others have said you deserve so much better. No one should live with that kind of abuse. Hang in there. God be with you!

[KarenCee 3]

Um....this thread is like over four months old. The OP hasn't been back. Doesn't appear that she will.

[Ban Hammer 13,349]

Um....this thread is like over four months old. The OP hasn't been back. Doesn't appear that she will.

Last Seen: 27 Sep 2006

agreed

[Fandango 1,439]

Wow, this is a blast from the past!

[randolady 1]

Jesus, your husband sounds like an #######. I hope everything turned out okay. :-/

[mRx 16]

how many more times are these bones gonna get dug up?

[dermeco 1]

I think we have to see the side of your husband too. You are putting all blame on him, but to be totally impartial we have to see his side to see what is happening. Why don’t you invite him to post over here also? I know for a fact that law always is on the side of women, and I hope your husband got a prenuptial agreement with you or else he is screwed.

[Mags 112]

This thread has now been dug up twice when it was months old. As the OP is no longer around on VJ, I'm going to lock this thread.