Surprise you have a 4 year old daughter!!!

[Channah&Aaron 51]

; Like others have mentioned.. he should take a DNA test!

& don't withdraw your petition just because of this...

[SuperDuper! 230]

[la2011 5]

As others have said, it seems it's not uncommon these days that children come out of the wood work It's not necessarily a bad thing, it could make you two stronger and once a DNA test has proven he is indeed the father, it could be fun to have a step-daughter. As long as you're ready for it and ok with the situation, you're good to go. My only issue with being with a man who has a child from a previous relationship is that I'd be afraid to get attached to the little darling and then the relationship doesnt work out and then I never see the child again. But in your case, you're engaged to be married, so no need to worry about that.

Good luck! I'm sure things will pan out, especially since he said it changes nothing. I agree with a previous poster that the mother of the child might have heard he's moving to the US and she wants her daughter to have the opportunity to move there too...

[DBAFra 1]

I would definitely have the test done to see if he is indeed the father. I would also verify with him that this is a surprise. I just went through the process, and they will scrutinize him with questions. I wouldn't withdraw. If he is the father, I would just attend the interview with the backup documentation. I would explain what happened. If you get denied, then just re-file. They should give you an indication of why you were denied. I wouldn't withdraw because of this. Circumstances change all the time, but just make sure that you are totally honest.

[Sergi9 110]

Half way thru k1 visa and my fiancé finds out he has a 4 year old daughter. ####### do I do now? Should I with draw!?

He's never even seen the kid.

Given the country of origin (a high fraud country) and the timing of the revelation and the fact she and he are there and you are here, its highly suspicious. Did she look him up in yellow pages and call to say, hey we have a child I never mentioned? What are the background circumstances? How well do you know this person and what else don't you know? It certainly begs the question as this came out of nowhere apparently.

This is not what you planned or signed up for and its perfectly legitimate and reasonable to reconsider the application as CLEARLY the original plans have dramatically changed. Whether the child comes to US with him or not the implied obligation for future child support and all the other attendant responsibilities and expenses go with that.

Not everyone wants baby mama drama and if you don't that doesn't make you a bad person.

[Soju 5]

My take on this is that. If father wants to be part of child's life and he should be responsible raising the child, then he needs to do the right thing. I am not sure how things are done in other country, but here you list father's name in the birth certificate. It can be very difficult process to go thru get father's name on birth certificate even with DNA test. There may be alot of paper work and court involved.

Does he have to pay child support? something to consider.

Does he wants to bring child with him to USA? if so it might make since to stop and redo the paper work?

Child's mama will let him raise after raising for 4 years? that to me is very highly unlikely.

I wish you the best. I think that this news surprised you in many ways I can think of.

sergi9, i think we are both thinking similar...

[LIFE'SJOURNEY 970]

Where did you get your FACTS that Jamaica was a high fraud country? Was this just a made up statement from your prospective?

I have never heard of this FACT.

[payxibka 10,047]

If the child is his, and he will have some responsibility for him/her, and you marry him, its very possible you may have some responsibility as well. Have you considered this?

how so? not her kid

[VanessaTony 3,567]

how so? not her kid

No but he will be her her husband. His income will need to pay child support, her income will need to make up the shortfall that paying child support causes. My ex casually told me about 2 years into our relationship that his $250K loan from his parents for schooling (international student) would be paid back once he gets a job. He never told me it was a "loan" and that it would need to be paid back. Nothing like being informed that the next tens of years of my life will be assisting to pay HIS debt... which is something I felt I should have been made aware of when we started dating.

she needs to be aware that she will be assisting with child support by way of making up the difference in income. That her family may need to make sacrifices for a child she's never met, for a woman she's never met. Just as I would have had to help pay his debt with changes to my life and why when Tony and I started dating I made sure he was fully aware I had a credit card debt I was paying off, and made sure he was okay with helping out with it if I didn't get a job before my savings to pay it while unemployed were depleted.

Edited July 22, 2011 by Vanessa&Tony

[LexiandAnthony 1]

I am so sorry to hear that you received that surprising news, but do you trust Toney????? I find it kind of ironic that after he was denied his visa, now out of the blue there is a 4 year old child out there that he knew nothing about. hmmmm. Now, of course I don't know Toney nor yourself, but for me that would be a red flag. You questioned yourself saying should you withdraw, but only you can answer that question, because at the end of the day no matter what advice you're given, you are the one who has to live with what choice you make, not anyone else.

He hasnt even had a interview yet... But now that he found there is a 4 year old. I dont know what will happen to the visa at interview... I am not leaving him.. I'll stick by his side and help him.. All I'm worried about is that after i've already send in forms that says he doesnt have kids where it ask.. what if at the interview they find that he actuallly does.. Boom probably denied

how so? not her kid

Not worried about caring for a kid that isnt mine.. I know the kid will be taking care of..

[LexiandAnthony 1]

That clip of the man falling is how i feel right now...

[LexiandAnthony 1]

As others have said, it seems it's not uncommon these days that children come out of the wood work It's not necessarily a bad thing, it could make you two stronger and once a DNA test has proven he is indeed the father, it could be fun to have a step-daughter. As long as you're ready for it and ok with the situation, you're good to go. My only issue with being with a man who has a child from a previous relationship is that I'd be afraid to get attached to the little darling and then the relationship doesnt work out and then I never see the child again. But in your case, you're engaged to be married, so no need to worry about that.

Good luck! I'm sure things will pan out, especially since he said it changes nothing. I agree with a previous poster that the mother of the child might have heard he's moving to the US and she wants her daughter to have the opportunity to move there too...

I agree with you... I wouldnt mind the child coming here.. I cant have kids so .... I'm just terrified he'll get denied for not having the childs info on the forms....

[LexiandAnthony 1]

My take on this is that. If father wants to be part of child's life and he should be responsible raising the child, then he needs to do the right thing. I am not sure how things are done in other country, but here you list father's name in the birth certificate. It can be very difficult process to go thru get father's name on birth certificate even with DNA test. There may be alot of paper work and court involved.

Does he have to pay child support? something to consider.

Does he wants to bring child with him to USA? if so it might make since to stop and redo the paper work?

Child's mama will let him raise after raising for 4 years? that to me is very highly unlikely.

I wish you the best. I think that this news surprised you in many ways I can think of.

sergi9, i think we are both thinking similar...

Thanks.. this is just super hard to grasp at the moment...

[FoundNanning 0]

I'm NOT advocating tellling a lie, but just curious....

How could they ever know/find out about about an 'out of wedlock' child in an interview?

[milimelo 4,571]

I'm NOT advocating tellling a lie, but just curious....

How could they ever know/find out about about an 'out of wedlock' child in an interview?

Well, non-disclosing and then later (if it proves it's his child) he turns around and petitions the daughter, or his new wife does, WILL raise issues and possible misrep charge if it's not disclosed at the interview. So new information surfaced after I-129f submission - at the interview time, come clean, provide DNA proof and proceed from there.

They do have everything you ever submitted in your A-file (envelopes included). Any discrepancies not rectified or mentioned at the interview can come back to haunt them.