Engaged to be married

[cellrock 0]

Hello everyone!

This is my very first time posting here so I really do hope I am posting in the right place. Let me tell you a little bit about my situation:

I am in my mid-early 20s and am a Canadian citizen. I live and work in Canada. In 2008 and 2009, I started making very short trips to the United States to visit a very dear family friend who was widowed a few years ago and having a difficult time. In 2009, I had a purposeful gap in employment and decided to visit for a couple of weeks. During this visit, in May 2009, I met a girl at a wedding I attended and we clicked! The connection is mutually undeniable and amazing!

The difficult part, obviously, is that we live in two different countries and eventually I had to return to work. Since meeting, I have visited several times for a few weeks at a time, most of which I have spent with her. Recently, I visited for two weeks and we discussed marriage as we had during my last trip. We really want to go through with it for one another but we are really unsure how to approach it because we have to be mindful of all the processes and laws. We do not consider ourselves to be engaged YET but would like to be after we talk with our families (a little traditional, yes, I know, my parents have not met her but I have met her parents). We are looking to be wed anytime during or after Spring 2012.

A little more information about me:

I did three years in a university undergrad program (science/engineering) but chose to leave school. I would like to return to school in the near future and have been thinking about the United States. My lovely lady is self-employed and successful and I would like to help her out with her business in the future but we feel it is inappropriate to use an employment-based route for me to be with her in the United States.

What is the best route for us? Should we marry in the United States or should we be applying for some fiancé visa and then marry later? We would like to eventually have a formal wedding ceremony with our family and friends but are not married (not pun intended) to having the civil procedure and wedding ceremony at the same time.

Thanks in advance and, please, let me know if anymore information is needed!

[cellrock 0]

Any help?

[KayDeeCee 4,894]

You could start deciding what route you would want to take, by looking at a comparison of the different visas here: http://www.visajourney.com/content/compare

It might help you get a better idea of exactly which route you want go with, being married first and applying for a spousal visa, or getting the fiance visa instead. It will depend on your plans.

With a fiance visa (K-1), you would come to the US, and need to be married within 90 days of arriving. You will not be able to leave and re-enter the US until you file for adjustment of status (AOS) and have either your advance parole travel document, or green card. Also, you will not be able to work in the US until after AOS and receiving either your work document (EAD) or green card. This will take some months to achieve.

With a spousal visa (CR-1 / IR-1), you would get married, and then you would live apart until the visa was approved. However, when you enter on a spousal visa, you would get your green card and be able to work and make visits in and out of the US right away. The total costs for a CR-1 / IR-1 are cheaper than going with the K-1 + AOS route.

[cellrock 0]

You could start deciding what route you would want to take, by looking at a comparison of the different visas here: http://www.visajourney.com/content/compare

It might help you get a better idea of exactly which route you want go with, being married first and applying for a spousal visa, or getting the fiance visa instead. It will depend on your plans.

With a fiance visa (K-1), you would come to the US, and need to be married within 90 days of arriving. You will not be able to leave and re-enter the US until you file for adjustment of status (AOS) and have either your advance parole travel document, or green card. Also, you will not be able to work in the US until after AOS and receiving either your work document (EAD) or green card. This will take some months to achieve.

With a spousal visa (CR-1 / IR-1), you would get married, and then you would live apart until the visa was approved. However, when you enter on a spousal visa, you would get your green card and be able to work and make visits in and out of the US right away. The total costs for a CR-1 / IR-1 are cheaper than going with the K-1 + AOS route.

Hi Jay-Kay! Thank you so much for your response.

We are not terribly picky; we just know that eventually we would like to have a ceremony at some point in Central Park in New York regardless of whether we are legally married at that point or not. Given that we have spent the bulk of the past 2+ years apart aside from the numerous visits I think we can handle being married and me working and living in Canada rather than just her supporting the two of us while we are in the United States waiting for AOS. The difference of a few hundred dollars is not an important factor in being permanently united with her but the ability to earn income would probably be helpful.

Would the best course of action be for us to be married and then I temporarily return to Canada? We may be young but we want to go through with this and be permanently reunited as soon as possible.

[JLaw 2]

My advice would be to consider the personal questions first. Do you wish to be married, then spend time apart or would waiting and starting married life together be better? Talking these personal questions over as a couple will be the most important aspect of the entire process. It's too easy at times to get lost in the paperwork and the waiting game. Not to sound selfish, but the lesson I've learned is to put yourselves first and not to base plans around outside factors.

Look then at the financial requirements, what documents both you and your fiancee will need, the time each will visa take, and decide together what will be best.

[KayDeeCee 4,894]

Hi Jay-Kay! Thank you so much for your response.

We are not terribly picky; we just know that eventually we would like to have a ceremony at some point in Central Park in New York regardless of whether we are legally married at that point or not. Given that we have spent the bulk of the past 2+ years apart aside from the numerous visits I think we can handle being married and me working and living in Canada rather than just her supporting the two of us while we are in the United States waiting for AOS. The difference of a few hundred dollars is not an important factor in being permanently united with her but the ability to earn income would probably be helpful.

Would the best course of action be for us to be married and then I temporarily return to Canada? We may be young but we want to go through with this and be permanently reunited as soon as possible.

You can come to the US and marry her in Central Park, and then return to Canada. Then, gather the documents and file for a spousal visa. Once you go through the process, you will be able to enter the US, get a stamp in your passport that acts as a temporary green card, and your green card will be mailed to you in about 2 weeks, I believe. You can ask in the CR-1 forum about exactly how it works, how long it takes, etc. There is also a Canadian specific forum as well. I don't have experience with that visa route. Good luck to you guys!