Filipina temper ! How you control it .

[honey_me 7]

No yelling for us(both hate it). I don't usually get mad at him and we tell each other everything. Rarely(once or twice a yr), he does something that drives me bananas though, some silly stuff and I stop talking(for like 15 mins or more). The next thing I know he's sticking his finger on my ear, trying to be funny . Also, we don't reject each other when one tries to approach the other and after 4.6 yrs, I think I found the fountain of selective memory.

[KT and Xyrena 4]

I'm as guilty as any women for using the silent treatment. My man has learned to deal with it and I have improved as well. Once he notices I have withdrawn and about to close, he asks in a low voice if he made me upset or something. I learned to answer with a low voice and says "no but I dont want to talk about it now" and he receives it and we'd be fine at that time without harder feelings. We'll resume the discussion at a better time - when more appropriate or when we're in bed (it works when you are physically close to each other).

I have practiced the silent treatment for a long time because I get to the point of bursting into real anger or tears and I don't want to do that, so I'd rather withdraw. I use the withdrawal period (perceived as silent treatment) to cool down.

[Mariye & Ky 172]

LOL... this topic had me laughing because I am the Filipina, but American born- USC. One should note before reading my post that my blood is thicker than water and my roots still have some of these traits described earlier such as the dreaded "silent treatment".... uh oh.... what's K (my fiance) in for when he gets here??? lol Sheesh, why wait? I'll do it now.

I am currently, or should I say, HE is currently on silent treatment as I type this.

This will last for a hot minute. For some of you who do not know what a "hot minute" is, allow me to explain. It is the time period that you, the offender [and soon to be victim of said Filipina wife/gf/fiance], will have either said, didn't say, or was about to say, something ......but you didn't. Instead, you went staring into space while she was 'telling you what she wants you to do'. ***OH BOY, ARE YOU IN TROUBLE!***

For me, the first symptom of the hot minute begins with the deep sigh. This sigh is expelled slowly and it does not make any sound due to the restaint the body must take before it loses control, takes over, and the distal upper extremities pick up the nearest object to spank [him]!

Second sympton of a hot minute is the turning on the heel and walking, while thoughts of gestures using my 5 digits of the left hand begin. Maybe I get animated mentally. So I see visions of variations on how some of my fingers can be curled and maybe one extended for exercise. I term this my "Flip op exercises" [off --said with filipino accent].

Now the fun begins and the silent treatment is enforced. Now a little secret is that a Filipina who is in silent mode is deeply hurt and is refraining from saying something sharp because let me tell you the next thing that rolls off that tongue is equivalent to a spoon digging out your eyes! So, beware because she is basically licking the wounds off her heart. In truth, she loves you so much, please understand that her silence is gender sacred and it is universal among us Pacific Islander Girls. It's innate when we're born and our voice is louder when we are quiet; so it's really not intended to hurt her man, but to heal her pride. Know when a Filipina loves, she loves deeply; she protects that love intensely and with a fever. This explains why her man mustn't cease during attempts to correct, kiss and caress her so she can return to her beautiful self and love you more than she did the hot mintue before!

Good luck to every kano aka: Haoli boy, who loves us AmFlip / Pinay girls through thick or thin.

Mari

PS: Disclosure. Gentlemen, I forgot to mention I am not responsible for those of you who do attempt to 'correct, kiss and caress' her [the flip girl you love]. Please note that you could be subject to the following: a). a flying object b). the pinching of the smallest of skin on the fatty bottom part of your arm c). a greeting with her adobo spoon d). her left shoe -- we have lots of shoes btw e). your wallet getting kinda skinny in the deal.

[I AM NOT THAT GUY 5,715]

LOL... this topic had me laughing because I am the Filipina, but American born- USC. One should note before reading my post that my blood is thicker than water and my roots still have some of these traits described earlier such as the dreaded "silent treatment".... uh oh.... what's K (my fiance) in for when he gets here??? lol Sheesh, why wait? I'll do it now.

I am currently, or should I say, HE is currently on silent treatment as I type this.

This will last for a hot minute. For some of you who do not know what a "hot minute" is, allow me to explain. It is the time period that you, the offender [and soon to be victim of said Filipina wife/gf/fiance], will have either said, didn't say, or was about to say, something ......but you didn't. Instead, you went staring into space while she was 'telling you what she wants you to do'. ***OH BOY, ARE YOU IN TROUBLE!***

For me, the first symptom of the hot minute begins with the deep sigh. This sigh is expelled slowly and it does not make any sound due to the restaint the body must take before it loses control, takes over, and the distal upper extremities pick up the nearest object to spank [him]!

Second sympton of a hot minute is the turning on the heel and walking, while thoughts of gestures using my 5 digits of the left hand begin. Maybe I get animated mentally. So I see visions of variations on how some of my fingers can be curled and maybe one extended for exercise. I term this my "Flip op exercises" [off --said with filipino accent].

Now the fun begins and the silent treatment is enforced. Now a little secret is that a Filipina who is in silent mode is deeply hurt and is refraining from saying something sharp because let me tell you the next thing that rolls off that tongue is equivalent to a spoon digging out your eyes! So, beware because she is basically licking the wounds off her heart. In truth, she loves you so much, please understand that her silence is gender sacred and it is universal among us Pacific Islander Girls. It's innate when we're born and our voice is louder when we are quiet; so it's really not intended to hurt her man, but to heal her pride. Know when a Filipina loves, she loves deeply; she protects that love intensely and with a fever. This explains why her man mustn't cease during attempts to correct, kiss and caress her so she can return to her beautiful self and love you more than she did the hot mintue before!

Good luck to every kano aka: Haoli boy, who loves us AmFlip / Pinay girls through thick or thin.

Mari

PS: Disclosure. Gentlemen, I forgot to mention I am not responsible for those of you who do attempt to 'correct, kiss and caress' her [the flip girl you love]. Please note that you could be subject to the following: a). a flying object b). the pinching of the smallest of skin on the fatty bottom part of your arm c). a greeting with her adobo spoon d). her left shoe -- we have lots of shoes btw e). your wallet getting kinda skinny in the deal.

It amazes me how she can go from loving me to hating me to back to loving me so quickly. There is no warm setting, just hot, or cold.

[Mariye & Ky 172]

It amazes me how she can go from loving me to hating me to back to loving me so quickly. There is no warm setting, just hot, or cold.

LOL...... yes but at least we're consistent!

[one...two...tree 2,762]

there will be a toilet paper, spatula or a pillow flying across the room if I'm already in that point. Sometimes there still some arm pinching and kicking him out of bed when he still chose to sleep in the same bed with me. Imbarassing.

I thought culturally, Filipinos are nonconfrontational, but obviously tempers will flare if you keep something inside until you erupt like a volcano with anger. Americans in general are much more blunt and upfront about something that is bothering them. I think if you've gotten to the point where you are throwing things, then you've held it inside for too long. It really comes down to effective communication - being able to express your feelings to your spouse where they are receptive and supportive, and communicating those feelings doesn't always have to be verbal.

I can tell when my wife is upset or angry from her facial expressions and body language, but for a lot of guys, we want you to tell us exactly what you are angry about. If you are expecting us to read your mind, you better go to a fortune teller. Women seem to be much more emotionally intuitive than men and they sometimes get upset when men can't seem to clue in on their emotions the way another woman friend would be able to. So I think accepting those differences can go a long way in keeping the emotions from boiling over.

Edited June 11, 2011 by 8TBVBN

[one...two...tree 2,762]

This will last for a hot minute. For some of you who do not know what a "hot minute" is, allow me to explain. It is the time period that you, the offender [and soon to be victim of said Filipina wife/gf/fiance], will have either said, didn't say, or was about to say, something ......but you didn't. Instead, you went staring into space while she was 'telling you what she wants you to do'. ***OH BOY, ARE YOU IN TROUBLE!***

That sounds to me like emotional manipulation - if we guys don't do what you women want then you get pissy? Forget that. I'm not going to play that game and imagine most guys won't. He may pretend like he wants to play this game of control with you, but I guarantee, if he has any self pride, he'll eventually ignore your little tantrums. Seriously, I don't care how much of a cultural thing this may be for you, but I'd reconsider how you approach getting what you want from your spouse and relationship, because that way will not lead to a harmonious one, unless you're content with "Yes, dear," and "No, dear" subordination.

[Mariye & Ky 172]

That sounds to me like emotional manipulation - if we guys don't do what you women want then you get pissy? Forget that. I'm not going to play that game and imagine most guys won't. He may pretend like he wants to play this game of control with you, but I guarantee, if he has any self pride, he'll eventually ignore your little tantrums. Seriously, I don't care how much of a cultural thing this may be for you, but I'd reconsider how you approach getting what you want from your spouse and relationship, because that way will not lead to a harmonious one, unless you're content with "Yes, dear," and "No, dear" subordination.

Good heavens 8TBVBV.... calm your butt down for heaven sakes! The post was written in SATIRE...... LOL .... "read my mind" ha ha....

And in case you need this:

sat·ire/ˈsaˌtī(ə)r/Noun1. The use of humor, irony, exaggeration, or ridicule to expose and criticize people's stupidity or vices, particularly in the context of contemporary politics and other topical issues.

[jrmejia 31]

I am a "YES MAM" kind of guy. I am the peacemaker. If she throws the pillow I pick up and give it back to her *cute*. Got it love that lady when she has an angry face. *YUMMY*

[one...two...tree 2,762]

Good heavens 8TBVBV.... calm your butt down for heaven sakes! The post was written in SATIRE...... LOL .... "read my mind" ha ha....

And in case you need this:

sat·ire/ˈsaˌtī(ə)r/Noun1. The use of humor, irony, exaggeration, or ridicule to expose and criticize people's stupidity or vices, particularly in the context of contemporary politics and other topical issues.

So you don't actually give your husband the silent treatment? Good, because I think women who do that to get their way are manipulative turds suffering from "daddy's little princess" complex. Somewhere along the line, somebody let them feel like the world revolved around them, and they never grew out of it. Hopefully, if their marriage to a Kano survives, they'll eventually be cured of this affliction.

Edited June 12, 2011 by 8TBVBN

[Mariye & Ky 172]

So you don't actually give your husband the silent treatment? Good, because I think women who do that to get their way are manipulative turds suffering from "daddy's little princess" complex. Somewhere along the line, somebody let them feel like the world revolved around them, and they never grew out of it. Hopefully, if their marriage to a Kano survives, they'll eventually be cured of this affliction.

Nah....... I love my darling too much to be quiet. LOL he has to hear my voice! LOL LOL.... a must. <evil grin> he he

[I AM NOT THAT GUY 5,715]

So you don't actually give your husband the silent treatment? Good, because I think women who do that to get their way are manipulative turds suffering from "daddy's little princess" complex. Somewhere along the line, somebody let them feel like the world revolved around them, and they never grew out of it. Hopefully, if their marriage to a Kano survives, they'll eventually be cured of this affliction.

Are you sure you still keep the family jewels? I would sleep with one eye open if I were you. There is a reason they only give Pinay a fork and spoon to eat with.

[calibob 73]

Are you sure you still keep the family jewels? I would sleep with one eye open if I were you. There is a reason they only give Pinay a fork and spoon to eat with.

:rofl:

[gretchen_darren 67]

LOL, it is so it hurts more when she digs your heart out..... A knife is too quick.....

I shared this thread with my fiance... she enjoyed it immensely laughing her heart out. I have yet to see her mad or upset.... I know she can be... But she also knows she is my heart, my soul. I am completely hers. i think this makes a difference in everything... we never tire of chatting or talking with each other. I try to learn more about her world and what goes on, but sometimes there is just nothing special going on for her. We talk about plans, things we want to do, places to go. Hanging on to today, and focusing on today, but also looking for the day when she "grows wings" to fly here to be with me. Right now we are in the "love is blind phase"....just hope the honeymoon never stops..... can''t afford to keep replacing dishes......

(BTW, this is true of most girls.... it is just in the Philippines, most things they have to throw are laying on the ground at their feet... they do not have to look hard for something....i would rather have a pinch then a slap, punch, or push or sleeping on the couch... the pinch is a very, very controlled way for her to get her point across... then she turns back to loving you....

I always praise my beloved. She is gwapa mangarap angel ko (beautiful dream angel (tagalog) or beautiful angel without wings in her dialect) either way, I always call her gwapa, say mahal na mahal kita, mis na mis kita every single day... let her know I am thinking of her....

[I AM NOT THAT GUY 5,715]

LOL, it is so it hurts more when she digs your heart out..... A knife is too quick.....

I shared this thread with my fiance... she enjoyed it immensely laughing her heart out. I have yet to see her mad or upset.... I know she can be... But she also knows she is my heart, my soul. I am completely hers. i think this makes a difference in everything... we never tire of chatting or talking with each other. I try to learn more about her world and what goes on, but sometimes there is just nothing special going on for her. We talk about plans, things we want to do, places to go. Hanging on to today, and focusing on today, but also looking for the day when she "grows wings" to fly here to be with me. Right now we are in the "love is blind phase"....just hope the honeymoon never stops..... can''t afford to keep replacing dishes......

(BTW, this is true of most girls.... it is just in the Philippines, most things they have to throw are laying on the ground at their feet... they do not have to look hard for something....i would rather have a pinch then a slap, punch, or push or sleeping on the couch... the pinch is a very, very controlled way for her to get her point across... then she turns back to loving you....

I always praise my beloved. She is gwapa mangarap angel ko (beautiful dream angel (tagalog) or beautiful angel without wings in her dialect) either way, I always call her gwapa, say mahal na mahal kita, mis na mis kita every single day... let her know I am thinking of her....

The wife says it's bad sport to throw things, especially dishes.

1) It's expensive.

2) Breaking most things brings back luck. If you break something, you have to break a like item right away to make the bad luck go away.

3) See number 1.