Non-Muslim SO's Practice Ramadan with their Muslim SO

[amal 4]

I am really wanting to - on many levels - and my plan is to try my best. I'm a little scared that I will have trouble with it. I, too, am used to having water all day and my work schedule can get pretty hectic. I am not the most pleasant person when I am hungry but I do think it would do a world of good for me. The only real fasts I've done before have been eating only one fruit at the time of each meal. I know I can do that. We'll see.... I'd like to very much.

Boy... that was a ramble, eh?

noura, don't worry if you mess up. even new muslims have some stretch and are forgiven the first few ramadans. Allah doesn't expect us to be perfect in the beginning. He only asks that we do everything with pure intent and with a happy heart. I wasn't able to do Ramadan last year although I tried so so hard. I am a very big water drinker...I'm talking 10 or more big glasses each day.... My husband said..you just do the best you can and Allah will accept it from you....This made me feel so much more relaxed!! I hope it helps you too

And, back on topic, I did try my best and fully intended on doing it with him this year (before I converted) so, there is nothing unusual about you wanting to do it Your husband will appreciate the help, I'm sure.

amal

[tnh9479 1]

Last year, I fasted about 60 percent of the time with Hicham. The hard part was no liquids. All I do is talk all day and that was kind of rough. When his family would talk with him, they would ask how I was doing since I had never tried before. They were proud at my effort. Here's to trying more this year!

Twila

P.S. Do any of you read the Quran each night? That is something we did together and it was great to have him there to explain things to me. Afterwards he would ask me my thoughts or opinions. We would discuss these things for more than an hour. It was most definitely a month that brought us closer.

[deeshla 0]

You know after reading these responses I have to say something -- I really never found fasting for Ramadan very difficult or trying. In fact, it is not a true fast. In Morocco, once the sun went down it was gorge-fest! I ate soup and milkshakes and doughnuts and pomegranates and "fat bread" (don't ask!) and fresh juices and cassseroles and crepes soaked in butter and honey and Shebekia and dates and siloo (a sort of peanuty-ground up delicious mound that you eat with a spoon) and eggs and tajines and salads and and.... I was stuffed from the call to prayer until I got into bed. I had to fight off people from shoving food down my throat at s7or in the middle of the night. I had to pretend illness in order not to throw up 9this was the way it was at Eid too). I generally gained about 5-10 pounds. No one worked during the day, sleeping until noon was encouraged.

Not drinking water was a pain, but hey! at least it was some sacrifice -- all of the gorging was starting to make me feel guilty!

[hollyw 0]

You know after reading these responses I have to say something -- I really never found fasting for Ramadan very difficult or trying. In fact, it is not a true fast. In Morocco, once the sun went down it was gorge-fest! I ate soup and milkshakes and doughnuts and pomegranates and "fat bread" (don't ask!) and fresh juices and cassseroles and crepes soaked in butter and honey and Shebekia and dates and siloo (a sort of peanuty-ground up delicious mound that you eat with a spoon) and eggs and tajines and salads and and.... I was stuffed from the call to prayer until I got into bed. I had to fight off people from shoving food down my throat at s7or in the middle of the night. I had to pretend illness in order not to throw up 9this was the way it was at Eid too). I generally gained about 5-10 pounds. No one worked during the day, sleeping until noon was encouraged.

Not drinking water was a pain, but hey! at least it was some sacrifice -- all of the gorging was starting to make me feel guilty!

but it's not this way here in the states or in other non-muslin countries... we're up for work or school and working all day long. my husband had a really hard time the past three Ramadan's in France because he was up every morning at 6:30 and working nonstop until sundown (most days he was home later than sundown because he had to go to Barbes to buy bread and meat) and doing all this on very little sleep, no food, no water during the day.... so i can understand why he's excited to be spending Ramadan in Algeria this year!!!!

[amal 4]

I guess it would be different if we could put our lives on hold for a month and not work so we could sleep till noon or so but that's not possible. I have to get up at 6:30am every day with my son and send him off to school so its gonna be really hard for me. (especially since I'm used to eating around 10:30am and drinking from the get-go)

[sarah and hicham 3]

I guess it would be different if we could put our lives on hold for a month and not work so we could sleep till noon or so but that's not possible. I have to get up at 6:30am every day with my son and send him off to school so its gonna be really hard for me. (especially since I'm used to eating around 10:30am and drinking from the get-go)

I thought that if you sleep all day during Ramadan that is almost like cheating... since it is not very trying?

[deeshla 0]

I guess it would be different if we could put our lives on hold for a month and not work so we could sleep till noon or so but that's not possible. I have to get up at 6:30am every day with my son and send him off to school so its gonna be really hard for me. (especially since I'm used to eating around 10:30am and drinking from the get-go)

I thought that if you sleep all day during Ramadan that is almost like cheating... since it is not very trying?

Exactly! Tell that to Moroccans! Businesses close, people wake up late and you see men sleeping on the side of the road all day. (Meanwhile women are starting up the harira at 2 p.m. or so) Ramadan is like a big party in Morocco. It will be a distinct challenge to fulfill it here in the U.S. -- it will be interesting to find out.

I am not a Muslim so Ramadan has more or a social quality to me -- in the same way Christmas does -- I feel that it is about family and togetherness and shared experience. I also sometimes wonder if there isn't a bit of a carb-loading purpose (for the specific area where I lived in the Sahara people mostly ate carbs at Fitur) for a people who have high energy needs as farmers.

[sarah and hicham 3]

I guess it would be different if we could put our lives on hold for a month and not work so we could sleep till noon or so but that's not possible. I have to get up at 6:30am every day with my son and send him off to school so its gonna be really hard for me. (especially since I'm used to eating around 10:30am and drinking from the get-go)

I thought that if you sleep all day during Ramadan that is almost like cheating... since it is not very trying?

Exactly! Tell that to Moroccans! Businesses close, people wake up late and you see men sleeping on the side of the road all day. (Meanwhile women are starting up the harira at 2 p.m. or so) Ramadan is like a big party in Morocco. It will be a distinct challenge to fulfill it here in the U.S. -- it will be interesting to find out.

I am not a Muslim so Ramadan has more or a social quality to me -- in the same way Christmas does -- I feel that it is about family and togetherness and shared experience. I also sometimes wonder if there isn't a bit of a carb-loading purpose (for the specific area where I lived in the Sahara people mostly ate carbs at Fitur) for a people who have high energy needs as farmers.

I wasn't in Morocco for Ramadan but I know Hicham's sister left for work every day at 6:45 am to go to Casa but got off early around 3 or 4 everyday to come home and start cooking and be with family. Hicham always got up around 4 am to eat then went to sleep until around 7 or 8 and went about his day. He told me if doesn't count if you sleep all day.

[UmmSqueakster 54]

I guess it would be different if we could put our lives on hold for a month and not work so we could sleep till noon or so but that's not possible. I have to get up at 6:30am every day with my son and send him off to school so its gonna be really hard for me. (especially since I'm used to eating around 10:30am and drinking from the get-go)

I thought that if you sleep all day during Ramadan that is almost like cheating... since it is not very trying?

It is cheating. The Prophet (saws) strongly spoke against stuffing yourself at night and sleeping during the day. *shrugs*

[amal 4]

yeah it is definitely cheating to sleep all day...oh so hard .... i keep telling myself .. i think i can, i think i can, i think i can...and I can't wait to be able to say... i thought i could, i thought i could, i thought i could

[UmmSqueakster 54]

[deeshla 0]

I guess it would be different if we could put our lives on hold for a month and not work so we could sleep till noon or so but that's not possible. I have to get up at 6:30am every day with my son and send him off to school so its gonna be really hard for me. (especially since I'm used to eating around 10:30am and drinking from the get-go)

I thought that if you sleep all day during Ramadan that is almost like cheating... since it is not very trying?

It is cheating. The Prophet (saws) strongly spoke against stuffing yourself at night and sleeping during the day. *shrugs*

That is why I never thought of Ramadan (as practiced in Morocco) as much of fast!

[sarah and hicham 3]

I guess it would be different if we could put our lives on hold for a month and not work so we could sleep till noon or so but that's not possible. I have to get up at 6:30am every day with my son and send him off to school so its gonna be really hard for me. (especially since I'm used to eating around 10:30am and drinking from the get-go)

I thought that if you sleep all day during Ramadan that is almost like cheating... since it is not very trying?

It is cheating. The Prophet (saws) strongly spoke against stuffing yourself at night and sleeping during the day. *shrugs*

That is why I never thought of Ramadan (as practiced in Morocco) as much of fast!

I'm sure not ALL Moroccans practice like the one's you saw. All of the ones I know do not sleep during the day and they fast just like everyone else. There's always some who don't do it "right" but not everyone is like that!

[dazy 0]

nope, nadda, no way.

He does all of the cooking though, so I guess I'm cooking for myself that week/month/however long it lasts.

[deeshla 0]

I guess it would be different if we could put our lives on hold for a month and not work so we could sleep till noon or so but that's not possible. I have to get up at 6:30am every day with my son and send him off to school so its gonna be really hard for me. (especially since I'm used to eating around 10:30am and drinking from the get-go)

I thought that if you sleep all day during Ramadan that is almost like cheating... since it is not very trying?

It is cheating. The Prophet (saws) strongly spoke against stuffing yourself at night and sleeping during the day. *shrugs*

That is why I never thought of Ramadan (as practiced in Morocco) as much of fast!

I'm sure not ALL Moroccans practice like the one's you saw. All of the ones I know do not sleep during the day and they fast just like everyone else. There's always some who don't do it "right" but not everyone is like that!

Um, live in Morocco for a while then we will talk. Anyway, I am not judging, it is still an effort and people do still owrk. But there is more of a party feeling and eating (and gaining weight) definitely an issue.