need help

[Krikit 1,165]

Additional posts have been removed. Any further such posts will be rewarded with a thread ban. Thank you for your cooperation.

[KittyPollitt 284]

To answer the OP's question- No, abandoning the relationship will not immediately effect your status. If it did effect your status, would you try to work it out? You should really try counseling.

[SweetHome_Alabama 5]

I agree with Kathryn....we should not judge harshly. and having three teenage children in my own household, I can relate and understand how challenging it can be for this man...I can see from my husband's experiences where maybe the poster could be coming from with his feelings.....both would have to have lots of patience....my kids liked my husband and now two doesn't talk to him and was disrespectful because he was new in relationship here and trying to do his best and they were looking for reasons to complain and compare and jealousies etc...we have come a long way but still have issues with my teenage kids so I can relate to this poster for his feelings of sorrow and wanting her kids to like him and like my husband he just wants a marriage and to live in peace and be respected..I have had to show the kids some tough love....I am glad my husband has patience and shows his enduring love, therefore I know my husband married me for nothing other than love....and he had an easier job back at home....there are lots of things that can affect marriages and we do not know all of this couple's issues, so let's not judge so harshly and I too thought the same at first but then I really thought his English is bad and he phrased what he wanted to say, badly....If they want their marriage to work and love one another, i would suggest counseling as well. Too keep in mind, living together is totally different from years of thinking you know someone from a few visits and seeing and talking to them on-line. Life throws you curves and obstacles in the way. We show our true self's when we start living together........It is no longer the fairy tale..it's reality and trully living together and making your lives the way you want it to be. This is just my opinions so don't beat me up.

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Alright, I am going to interject here.

First, unless you have had a lot of experience dealing with individuals whose first language is not English, do not assume that how you interpret someone's post is the same way they meant it. The OP's English use is consistent with someone who does not understand the nuances of the language. Instead of 'adding' your nuanced interpretations to his words, read the sentences individually and determine what they mean. It is equally interpretable as meaning 'my situation is thus - I have my green card so am a permanent resident. My marriage, however, is not going well. My wife's 3 teen aged daughters and I don't get along. My wife and I are arguing all of the time and we are both unhappy. If we get divorced, how will this affect my status in this country.". That is what he has said - and if you had read it as written in those words you would not now be accusing him of fraud.

Please, this website is supposed to be helpful and constructive, not judgmental and critical. When you read a post that you know is not written by a native English speaker/writer - think twice or three times about how each sentence can be phrased or constructed and put into context in the greater whole.

His situation is plausible and has been seen many times here on Visa Journey. Some relationship chasms are just too deep to bridge easily due to cultural differences and personality conflicts. Unless you actually have hard and fast proof that this man has committed visa fraud - and I see nothing in his post to indicate that he has (and I have had a lot of experience dealing with non-native English speakers), then answer his question with consideration and care - or do not participate in this thread. Speculation and supposition are good for gossip but not for facts.

This post is made both as a moderator and as a member of Visa Journey.

I repeat - if you have nothing constructive to add to this discussion, then do not add anything at all. Two posts violating TOS have already been removed and I will remove others if necessary.

Edited May 10, 2011 by SweetHome_Alabama

[Harsh_77 718]

hello,

Since i received my GC im not happy with my wife at all because she has already 3 daughters teenager and else ETC...

my question is (if some one want to abandon our relationship so if affect my status??)

thanks everyone.

Edited May 11, 2011 by Harsh_77

[katiemanny 64]

hello,

Since i received my GC im not happy with my wife at all because she has already 3 daughters teenager and else ETC...

my question is (if some one want to abandon our relationship so if affect my status??)

thanks everyone.

Why since you receive your GC, what happened before you received it, did you try to work it out, if yes. Why can't you sit together and talk to your wife about issues in your marriage now. I too have the same suspicion that you were waiting for your GC to leave your wife.

And it seems that you are the one who is having issues in the marriage, cause you said you are not happy at all, not we are not happy.