need help

[Shenzhen 34]

hello,

Since i received my GC im not happy with my wife at all because she has already 3 daughters teenager and else ETC...

my question is (if some one want to abandon our relationship so if affect my status??)

thanks everyone.

How long have you 2 been together in the USA? This sounds bad I read these everyday. Just yesterday I read another horror story. You wonder why it takes so long for or SO to get here. Now we see the real truth come out. I believe the visa officers are trying to protect AMERICAN citizens from becoming a conduit for a green cards. A shame really scammers abound!

[nurse1967 287]

I agree Tahlisha. I don't think we "misunderstood" him at all. He said it himself. After he got his GC he decided he wasn't happy and his wife has 3 teenage daughters. It's people like him who muck up the system for everyone else. Then people wonder why Casa is considered such high fraud???? This is a prime example.

Edited May 10, 2011 by Betsy El Sum

[Tahlisha 28]

Im sorry but I am really feeling like he married just for thr GC.... I mean his english may not be good but why start with what he started with and then come back and clean it up???? If the 2nd post is the reasons for his un happiness why not start with that?????

[nurse1967 287]

My point exactly sister. Usually you are going to get the good stuff right out of the gate. When someone has to go back and clean their story up it's usually suspicious.

[FormerlyKnownAs 17]

Oh my... Breaks my heart a little more for the VJers who seem to be well and truly in love (regardless of whether they have pesky teenagers) who can't get approval via the Casa embassy even after multiple attempts in some cases. I'm very sorry for the situation of the OP, more for his wife and the children involved... I wish we could all hear the other sides of this story. Oh well... I have to say I agree with both Becky and Tahlisha.

To the OP himself, you will really need to be able to prove that you entered into this marriage sincerely. Given the high rate of fraud for Morocco, I would say you will be scrutinized very stringently. Prepare yourself for an uphill battle to prove yourself. You can see the initial reaction you get from those of us familiar with the immigration process. Just imagine the reaction you'll get from the government officials who are in charge of deciding whether you've actually committed fraud. Maybe it would help us to hear more details, like how long you've been married, when you decided you no longer wanted to be married, what kind of visa you entered the country on... Sounds pretty bad so far, however, since you started the conversation with the words that everyone has latched onto: Since i received my GC

[SalJoy 11]

Well, the first 12 months are always tough in a new relationship. Give yourself and your wife some time to settle down. You will be in a better position to make a sound decision if you analyze the things that are creating the problems. You may regret it later if you make the wrong decision in a hurry. May be you both will understand the value of each other in time.

Cmon people,

Put yourself in his shoes. May be his english is bad but i am sure he knows that if he gets divorced soon after getting GC, everyone will think that he used his wife for GC. May be he is going thru tough time. Who knows. Why cant we answer his query rather than blaming him based on what we think about his post. If we have nothing better to say then we should keep our mouth shut.

[KittyPollitt 284]

If we have nothing better to say then we should keep our mouth shut.

This is easy for you to say, having not had to suffer through the intense scrutiny of the consulate in this man's home country due to visa fraud. I think he was speaking frankly in his original post, and the tone of his question was well, questionable. Casablanca is a tough consulate because of family visa fraud. Armed with that knowledge, and the context of the OP's original post, coming to the conclusion that he is using his wife for a greencard is not an illogical assumption.

[Kathryn41 3,205]

Alright, I am going to interject here.

First, unless you have had a lot of experience dealing with individuals whose first language is not English, do not assume that how you interpret someone's post is the same way they meant it. The OP's English use is consistent with someone who does not understand the nuances of the language. Instead of 'adding' your nuanced interpretations to his words, read the sentences individually and determine what they mean. It is equally interpretable as meaning 'my situation is thus - I have my green card so am a permanent resident. My marriage, however, is not going well. My wife's 3 teen aged daughters and I don't get along. My wife and I are arguing all of the time and we are both unhappy. If we get divorced, how will this affect my status in this country.". That is what he has said - and if you had read it as written in those words you would not now be accusing him of fraud.

Please, this website is supposed to be helpful and constructive, not judgmental and critical. When you read a post that you know is not written by a native English speaker/writer - think twice or three times about how each sentence can be phrased or constructed and put into context in the greater whole.

His situation is plausible and has been seen many times here on Visa Journey. Some relationship chasms are just too deep to bridge easily due to cultural differences and personality conflicts. Unless you actually have hard and fast proof that this man has committed visa fraud - and I see nothing in his post to indicate that he has (and I have had a lot of experience dealing with non-native English speakers), then answer his question with consideration and care - or do not participate in this thread. Speculation and supposition are good for gossip but not for facts.

This post is made both as a moderator and as a member of Visa Journey.

I repeat - if you have nothing constructive to add to this discussion, then do not add anything at all. Two posts violating TOS have already been removed and I will remove others if necessary.

Edited May 10, 2011 by Kathryn41

[TBoneTX 45,543]

VJ is truly blessed to have Kathryn as a moderator and an active, concerned member, si man.

Another consideration is that the OP has simultaneously had to adjust culturally and develop a relationship not only with his wife, but with THREE other persons, who have to go through their own adjustments to the situation at a volatile age for anyone. Holy mackerel!

[emh836 2]

good discussion. normally everyone on here is so fruity,,, how come some countries have alot more applicants than others?

[Krikit 1,164]

Moving from AOS Process to Effects of Major Changes.

[Codeblue009 3]

Alright, I am going to interject here.

First, unless you have had a lot of experience dealing with individuals whose first language is not English, do not assume that how you interpret someone's post is the same way they meant it. The OP's English use is consistent with someone who does not understand the nuances of the language. Instead of 'adding' your nuanced interpretations to his words, read the sentences individually and determine what they mean. It is equally interpretable as meaning 'my situation is thus - I have my green card so am a permanent resident. My marriage, however, is not going well. My wife's 3 teen aged daughters and I don't get along. My wife and I are arguing all of the time and we are both unhappy. If we get divorced, how will this affect my status in this country.". That is what he has said - and if you had read it as written in those words you would not now be accusing him of fraud.

Please, this website is supposed to be helpful and constructive, not judgmental and critical. When you read a post that you know is not written by a native English speaker/writer - think twice or three times about how each sentence can be phrased or constructed and put into context in the greater whole.

His situation is plausible and has been seen many times here on Visa Journey. Some relationship chasms are just too deep to bridge easily due to cultural differences and personality conflicts. Unless you actually have hard and fast proof that this man has committed visa fraud - and I see nothing in his post to indicate that he has (and I have had a lot of experience dealing with non-native English speakers), then answer his question with consideration and care - or do not participate in this thread. Speculation and supposition are good for gossip but not for facts.

This post is made both as a moderator and as a member of Visa Journey.

I repeat - if you have nothing constructive to add to this discussion, then do not add anything at all. Two posts violating TOS have already been removed and I will remove others if necessary.

AMEN!!!!!!!

[Que Saudade 284]

In my humble opinion, I think the first response would be, "What can I do to save my marriage?" Then I would answer to try marriage counseling/family counseling (since teens are involved). But since the first response was not that, my answer is still... Have you tried marriage counseling? If not, then I would suggest to try that. Then you can re-evaluate your situation. Hope that your marriage succeeds and does not fail.

[Robert&Liliya 31]

Odd, the post from December 2010 say it is because she was cheating on him, stole from him and does not respect him. Now it is because of her three daughters? I would recommend Always work on your marriage as it is not all romance and roses. Marriage is a lot of working on yourself and on your relationship. It is not walking away because a teenager is not as respectful as we would like. Marriage is working on the root cause of your issues. I agree with counseling and not just marriage but Family counseling. That is what you are when you marry someone with children. Just my opinion, I could be wrong.

[BSquared 9]

Instead of 'adding' your nuanced interpretations to his words, read the sentences individually and determine what they mean. It is equally interpretable as meaning 'my situation is thus - I have my green card so am a permanent resident. My marriage, however, is not going well. My wife's 3 teen aged daughters and I don't get along. My wife and I are arguing all of the time and we are both unhappy. If we get divorced, how will this affect my status in this country.". That is what he has said - and if you had read it as written in those words you would not now be accusing him of fraud.

Unless you actually have hard and fast proof that this man has committed visa fraud - and I see nothing in his post to indicate that he has, then answer his question with consideration and care - or do not participate in this thread.

agreed.