Is your life on hold?

[CarolineM 0]

My love life is on hold.....our family planning is on hold...but I have a life too - friends, family, a job, interests....sure it's not the same without him, but him being far away doesn't mean I cease to exist.

Shon - I would say this kinda sums it up. Missing your SO like crazy is one thing - but cutting off all ties in your current life to put everything "on hold." Like not going out with friends anymore, losing your hobbies and your interests...living you life just to get home and get on the internet and talk to them...

My point is, you have to have your OWN life when they get here or it could be bad...Does that make sense??

[Bunnyqr 0]

I know the feeling. But my life is still the same in the sense of what I do every day hasn't changed. I still get up in the morning for a power walk with my sister, make my coffee, take the subway ride to work, grab another cup of coffee from the cart outside my office. I keep busy at work and then can't wait to go home and hopefully not miss his phone call. I am stuck underground on the subway for a good 35 minutes with no cell phone reception. He doesn't have voice mail so I can never leave a message but I will text. His new phone doesn't text and he doesn't use the internet so it is a hit or miss with the phone. We pretty much have each others schedule down pat but not always get each other. What is on hold is my new life with him. I am chomping at the bit to get this wonderful new life started. My love, my life with him, our home, our new beginnings. Instead, I still get up and wonder what the hell I am going to wear to work and how much I can accomplish during the day. That's all. I still go shopping, get pedicures, see my friends, watch movies but I feel like an empty shell going through the motions.

[Sheriff Uling 3]

I still go to some social functions, workout, read books, swim, play basketball, go the beach, rollerblade, play intramural sports, and visit my family. Not to mention, I have been putting in overtime at work to pass the time. But my heart is across the Pacific Ocean. It’s hard for me to look at a globe because when I observe how far we are apart… It takes everything within me to hold back the tears. Those who have mastered cooping with the separation of their beloved, that’s great. I wish that I was that strong or disciplined emotionally. So even though I still go about my everyday routine and get some fun activities in between, my life feels incomplete without her here with me and that is why I feel like my life is on hold.

vartan – Hang in there! We have also encountered some unplanned expenses that we’re dealing with. Unplanned expenses always seem to pop-up at the most peculiar times. Like why now…? Hey, with all these animal rights folks. You might not want to mention that you aren’t showing your dog love… The will picket in front of you place. LOL!

[babybunny 2]

My love life is on hold.....our family planning is on hold...but I have a life too - friends, family, a job, interests....sure it's not the same without him, but him being far away doesn't mean I cease to exist.

Shon - I would say this kinda sums it up. Missing your SO like crazy is one thing - but cutting off all ties in your current life to put everything "on hold." Like not going out with friends anymore, losing your hobbies and your interests...living you life just to get home and get on the internet and talk to them...

My point is, you have to have your OWN life when they get here or it could be bad...Does that make sense??

I supposed it makes sence to you. but, it dont to me. my husband is my life.

without him life sucks azzz.. I cope and mope thats all I can do.

[JenT 0]

My love life is on hold.....our family planning is on hold...but I have a life too - friends, family, a job, interests....sure it's not the same without him, but him being far away doesn't mean I cease to exist.

Shon - I would say this kinda sums it up. Missing your SO like crazy is one thing - but cutting off all ties in your current life to put everything "on hold." Like not going out with friends anymore, losing your hobbies and your interests...living you life just to get home and get on the internet and talk to them...

My point is, you have to have your OWN life when they get here or it could be bad...Does that make sense??

I'm with you and LisaD. I had a very full life before I met David (I wasn't looking) and I have a very full life now. I have not stopped doing any of the things I had been doing before we met, although I fully expect to make compromises once he arrives. We've talked a great deal about the entire adjustment process.

Having him here will be the 'icing on my cake'. I miss him terribly, and we long for the day that we can be a family and doing some of these things together. We are both independent and quite used to being on our own so David doesn't 'complete me', but he balances me. I do not dwell on the distance between us. There's nothing more I can do to change it at this point, so moping is futile. I've never been one for self-pity.

Jen

[wileastmot 0]

This topic is very thought provoking. I too, have felt that I'm on hold until Wilmot comes. I haven't stopped doing things but I keep thinking how much better it will be when he is here, or all of the things that will be easier with him here. Someone to greet the kids when they come home from school, have dinner done when I get home once in a while. . . .Anyway hopefully everything will go as planned and he will be here Oct. 7th.

[iceyspots 0]

I know the feeling. But my life is still the same in the sense of what I do every day hasn't changed. I still get up in the morning for a power walk with my sister, make my coffee, take the subway ride to work, grab another cup of coffee from the cart outside my office. I keep busy at work and then can't wait to go home and hopefully not miss his phone call. I am stuck underground on the subway for a good 35 minutes with no cell phone reception. He doesn't have voice mail so I can never leave a message but I will text. His new phone doesn't text and he doesn't use the internet so it is a hit or miss with the phone. We pretty much have each others schedule down pat but not always get each other. What is on hold is my new life with him. I am chomping at the bit to get this wonderful new life started. My love, my life with him, our home, our new beginnings. Instead, I still get up and wonder what the hell I am going to wear to work and how much I can accomplish during the day. That's all. I still go shopping, get pedicures, see my friends, watch movies but I feel like an empty shell going through the motions.

Aww.. voice mail exists in algeria but next to nobody gets it... I get frustrated about that!

[snz1802 0]

I feel the part of my life that includes him in here in the U.S. at this time is on hold, such as planning, I feel as if I can't plan anything right now, like the wedding etc..., but as for everything else, no....I do everything I did before. I have never been a real social type of person anyway, but I don't sit around and mope around all the time because he is not here, I know he will be back and that is what keeps me going and in a positive energy. We just make sure we communicate and talk about everything and anything and that makes us feel just as close as ever. Even though we are thousands of miles apart.

[BelwinMills 0]

I haven't put my life on hold but I am waiting for hubby to get here. Yes he is missing but we have been doing this long distance almost 9 years so I am so use to it. I wake up, go to work, workout, go home and finish my work. But on weekends I hangout with friends and if we miss one day without talking we live. He works nights and I work days so we might talk a few minutes. I do my travels and activites to keep myself up beat. Its tuff but if ones strong we will all handle. I beleive thie process stinks to wait but good things come to those who wait.

the only thing on hold is a life together and starting to build a family cant soon come.

[vartan 0]

Hey, with all these animal rights folks. You might not want to mention that you aren’t showing your dog love… The will picket in front of you place. LOL!

I love and take care of my dog better then most people take care of their children.. i just wish i could give more.. I invite anyone to come to my house and tell me that.. they will one have to deal with my dog then me ..

And hope it doesnt get to my fiance.. or game over, she is very protective over our pup ..

But yeah Uling I know.. I am holding up and dealing with the problems.. they will be over soon.

Edited September 8, 2006 by vartan

[sbgwolf1 0]

Yes my life is on hold. I eat, sleep, work and talk to her. Once in a while it is something with my family, but usually obligatory things. I found when I am off we will talk into the wee hours then I get up early again to talk to her. I end up napping in the middle of the day when she is sleeping. Its a big circle. I want my life shared with her. Movies I want to share with her, the park, just everything. I do church because that is hugely important to her and then later that night I share the lesson with her. Basically, my life was made whole by my baby and without her it is empty.....

Baby come home soon..

wolf

[aussiewench 9]

Yep, sadly my life WAS on hold.....not just the missing my husband terribly part. My life was on hold for 16 months with no visits to help ease the pain of seperation.......just the phone and internet to keep in touch. Did I mope all the time, nope.....did I cry sometimes, I sure did......My life was VJ during our time seperated and it helped a lot. I'm co-dependant and it dont fuss me that I am. I still spent time with my grown children and family but there is only so much I could do that, besides they have there own lives....mine was in limbo.

[Sheriff Uling 3]

I thought about this thread as I began to deal with the feelings of missing my Baby. Some days, minutes, and even seconds are harder than others, I must admit. It’s not that my life is on hold… It’s that my life is incomplete... My heart is across the Pacific Ocean. As I wrote earlier in this thread, I go throughout my days as usual doing the very things love to do but my life will not be the same until we are together forever. My heart goes out to all of you cooping with the emotions of missing your loved ones waiting on this process to conclude … Cheers!!!

[anya-D 8]

When i was waiting for my visa.. My life was on hold only becasue I couldnt make any plan.. I was lucky also becasue Bram was with me almost the whole time in Thailand. But while he was not with me (oh yes we had seperate times too) I had so much to do (visiting my families, and riends, work and shop for stuff to bring to the US) that I didnt feel so depress or sad.. I missed him though. I kept my self busy and try to lived and remember Thailand as much as possible becasue i know wont be back anytime soon...

I must admit. It’s not that my life is on hold… It’s that my life is incomplete...

That's exacly how i felt too But it wll pass soon and you will soon be with her!

[KiKi 0]

Hang in there guys, it's all worth it in the end.....

My hubby has been here for almost a year now...and it's great.

My life was on hold for 3 years and now we're living it to the fullest!

Hang in there!!!!