Filipina coming to California

[ceri+marilou 0]

Hi everyone. So excited now that we finally have our NOA2, now I'm starting to plan ahead for my fiancee coming to San Jose (SF Bay Area). My big worry is that she has a big family and lots of friends back home in Butuan City, and when she comes here it will be such a big change, she will feel very lonely.

Anyone know of any groups in SF Bay Area to help new arrivals? Something with events, cultural support, maybe language help?

I'm getting the Filipino cable TV package and an extra big rice cooker to start!

[pathway2gc 0]

Hi everyone. So excited now that we finally have our NOA2, now I'm starting to plan ahead for my fiancee coming to San Jose (SF Bay Area). My big worry is that she has a big family and lots of friends back home in Butuan City, and when she comes here it will be such a big change, she will feel very lonely.

Anyone know of any groups in SF Bay Area to help new arrivals? Something with events, cultural support, maybe language help?

I'm getting the Filipino cable TV package and an extra big rice cooker to start!

Lol! The extra big rice cooker made me laugh. I'm from San Jose as well. I also have a big family, most of them are here, and have Filipino and American friends as well. I'll be able to help her with cultural support/ adapt to life here in the States. Does she speak Tagalog?

[Tim/Mav 305]

Hi everyone. So excited now that we finally have our NOA2, now I'm starting to plan ahead for my fiancee coming to San Jose (SF Bay Area). My big worry is that she has a big family and lots of friends back home in Butuan City, and when she comes here it will be such a big change, she will feel very lonely.

Anyone know of any groups in SF Bay Area to help new arrivals? Something with events, cultural support, maybe language help?

I'm getting the Filipino cable TV package and an extra big rice cooker to start!

I'm sorry for Laughing But what did you expect. Of course they have big Families. When you Marry her you married the whole family. I was lost in the Philipphines but Mav was always there to translate, money, bargain, etc. Now it's your turn. She will be lost without you in the US. I'm not going to get Mav Cable TV unless she forces me too. Check-out local Asian food markets for her favorites and introduce her to the US culture. She is more nervious than you. KINDA THINK ? Her lonelyness will start when she boards the plane. MAKE SENSE. If your there for her, everything will be fine and help her adjust ! She will never forget her Homeland but thats perfectly normal.

[Kish.2328 9]

Hey, I am from Butuan City too but i'll be moving in MI as soon as everything is okay. I think she will be fine although the first 2-5 months will be the hardest but for sure she can adjust lil by lil.

[ceri+marilou 0]

Lol! The extra big rice cooker made me laugh. I'm from San Jose as well. I also have a big family, most of them are here, and have Filipino and American friends as well. I'll be able to help her with cultural support/ adapt to life here in the States. Does she speak Tagalog?

I'm sorry for Laughing But what did you expect. Of course they have big Families. When you Marry her you married the whole family. I was lost in the Philipphines but Mav was always there to translate, money, bargain, etc. Now it's your turn. She will be lost without you in the US. I'm not going to get Mav Cable TV unless she forces me too. Check-out local Asian food markets for her favorites and introduce her to the US culture. She is more nervious than you. KINDA THINK ? Her lonelyness will start when she boards the plane. MAKE SENSE. If your there for her, everything will be fine and help her adjust ! She will never forget her Homeland but thats perfectly normal.

Hey, I am from Butuan City too but i'll be moving in MI as soon as everything is okay. I think she will be fine although the first 2-5 months will be the hardest but for sure she can adjust lil by lil.

Thanks for all the responses!

@pathway2gc - thanks so much for the offer! Let's stay in touch and as things move closer we should plan to meet up.

I've known my fiancee for 4 years so I know all about her big family, and I've stocked up on tocino and longanisa from Lion Market.. I keep telling her she will be unhappy, lonely when she comes, and everyone feels that way for at least 3 months. The more I can do for her to help settle in the sooner she can start enjoying what US has to offer. She always says she will be happy just being with me (how sweet ) but yeah, leaving home and getting on the plane will be when it hits home.

I've been to Butuan about 4 times - nice place, if a bit too hot for me. And I get a bit worried about being kidnapped by the NPA when I'm in the village (Dulag)..

[tallcoolone 102]

Your girl will probably go into depression for a few months.

She comes from a place of little stress, with friendly people everywhere, and the streets are always full of people and always something to do.

She comes to America where we live a stressful life and worry about the all mighty dollar. She will be stuck alone in a house/apartment with nothing to do for about 6 months while she learns to drive or gets a work permit.

A lot of girls come from Philippines to USA expecting to find Utopia and what they have seen on TV about the America. Once they arrive they realize that the great ole USA ain't cracked up to what they thought.

In reality they have paradise in Philippines, and coming to USA is a downgrade for most of them...

[ceri+marilou 0]

Your girl will probably go into depression for a few months.

She comes from a place of little stress, with friendly people everywhere, and the streets are always full of people and always something to do.

She comes to America where we live a stressful life and worry about the all mighty dollar. She will be stuck alone in a house/apartment with nothing to do for about 6 months while she learns to drive or gets a work permit.

A lot of girls come from Philippines to USA expecting to find Utopia and what they have seen on TV about the America. Once they arrive they realize that the great ole USA ain't cracked up to what they thought.

In reality they have paradise in Philippines, and coming to USA is a downgrade for most of them...

Yeah I think anyone coming here looking for a work/life opportunity will have the incentive to make the best of it. Coming here on K1 is primarily to be together, so the impact is much harder. I'm trying to plan lots of activities and trips so she can put the depression aside.

Also I think because I send money back to support her and family she is 'queen of the village' right now and will be a hard adjustment to be a regular American. I actually emigrated from UK in 2000 so I know a little bit about moving abroad and culture shock, but nowhere near the difference between Philippines and here.

In her eyes if we lived together in Philippines that is ideal. I would do that if I could get the same type of job in Philippines that I have now, but no chance.

I think over time she will appreciate California. Probably not like it as much as Butuan City but it has lots of things going for it..

[lee&jeniebee 23]

Your girl will probably go into depression for a few months.

She comes from a place of little stress, with friendly people everywhere, and the streets are always full of people and always something to do.

She comes to America where we live a stressful life and worry about the all mighty dollar. She will be stuck alone in a house/apartment with nothing to do for about 6 months while she learns to drive or gets a work permit.

A lot of girls come from Philippines to USA expecting to find Utopia and what they have seen on TV about the America. Once they arrive they realize that the great ole USA ain't cracked up to what they thought.

In reality they have paradise in Philippines, and coming to USA is a downgrade for most of them...

Dude, you are right on in this post, good work! I hope to retire in about 12 years and move to the Philippines, maybe Cagayan De Oro? My fiancee has family there, we can build a nice house and hang with her family. In the mornings I can drink coffee and watch the chickens pick in the yard, get mt Pajero ready for the next Safari. The more time I spend in the Philippines, the more I wonder about our isolated little lives in America???

[I AM NOT THAT GUY 5,715]

Coming to the states will be a shock to the system. Best to get that shock over quickly. Find a way to keep her occupied. The internet is an inexpensive way for her to keep touch with friends and family. Try not to leave her alone until she adjusts. Find the local Filipino community center and make contact. Church is important. Expect to attend church every Sunday. Find the nearest Asian store that has comfort foods. There is a Sea Food City in Vallejo that has everything. Maybe there is one closer to San Jose. Keep her busy. Help her learn about American conveniences like hot water and central heat. Buy an electric blanket. She will be emotional. She may try to run away. You are in for the ride of your life. You will survive.

[amerisian 5]

Hi everyone. So excited now that we finally have our NOA2, now I'm starting to plan ahead for my fiancee coming to San Jose (SF Bay Area). My big worry is that she has a big family and lots of friends back home in Butuan City, and when she comes here it will be such a big change, she will feel very lonely.

Anyone know of any groups in SF Bay Area to help new arrivals? Something with events, cultural support, maybe language help?

I'm getting the Filipino cable TV package and an extra big rice cooker to start!

Hehe. Sorry, this Post made my day especially the extra big rice cooker. I really laughed. sorry. I agree with other post. Try to be with her while she is still on her adjustment period. Homesickness can really lead into depression. I guess, you can bring her somewhere to enjoy. I am from Philippines too and left home since I was 16 and worked and study by own far from my family. But when I went abroad and worked, I thought I am already brave enough to fight homesickness but isn't true. Its only takes 3 months though and you will feel relieved. My hubby is in Bay point (CA), and I will be there too sooner, God's will and help. I saw the place on google map, seems quiet and lonely..lol. But that's why we get married to have a life together with our spouse. I'm sure everything will be fine for her and for everybody who is moving from Philippines to the USA, a lot of adjustment though. Try her to get involve in the church. God bless.

[SuperDuper! 230]

Your girl will probably go into depression for a few months.

She comes from a place of little stress, with friendly people everywhere, and the streets are always full of people and always something to do.

She comes to America where we live a stressful life and worry about the all mighty dollar. She will be stuck alone in a house/apartment with nothing to do for about 6 months while she learns to drive or gets a work permit.

A lot of girls come from Philippines to USA expecting to find Utopia and what they have seen on TV about the America. Once they arrive they realize that the great ole USA ain't cracked up to what they thought.

In reality they have paradise in Philippines, and coming to USA is a downgrade for most of them...

Once again, Jack is right on the money.

OP, you think that you know your lady from visiting her in the PR once or twice or more? You got another thing coming. You are thinking the right way with the TFC channel and rice cooker, really. Finding other Pinays is also a good idea of course, but you are going to have to endure her depression while she adjusts to the anonymous and individualistic society that is the USA.

Hope you can send her back home to visit within the first 12 months and promise her ahead.

Set up a PC, and internet connection B4 she comes to you, so she can Skype daily.

There is probably a Seafood City Store nearby where she can buy familiar foods. Patience, tongue biting and endless patience will get you thru. Good luck.

[Tahoma 2,292]

Her lonelyness will start when she boards the plane.

I think she will be fine although the first 2-5 months will be the hardest but for sure she can adjust lil by lil.

I keep telling her she will be unhappy, lonely when she comes, and everyone feels that way for at least 3 months.

Your girl will probably go into depression for a few months.

She will be emotional. She may try to run away. You are in for the ride of your life. You will survive.

you are going to have to endure her depression while she adjusts to the anonymous and individualistic society that is the USA.

After reading all this doom and gloom, I'm feeling very lucky because Chinook effortlessly adjusted to life here in the U.S. She has never been homesick, depressed, unhappy, nor lonely. And she hasn't run away (yet)!

She loves our home, our neighborhood, and our city. She enjoyed getting to know my family and friends, especially my Pinoy friends. She likes our neighbors too.

She's never been stuck in our home because we live in an inner-city Seattle neighborhood where everything is within walking distance. Also, before she got her driver's license, she could shop downtown or explore other parts of the city via the great bus system here. The bus stop is only one block away from our home.

We are also fortunate to have several good Filipino grocery stores, restaurants, and turo-turos in our area. Our kitchen is stocked with all of her favorite brands from back home in 'Pinas. However, she doesn't want to get a rice cooker. She prefers to cook rice in a pan on the stove top. She was happy to switch from charcoal to electric. She doesn't even use a measuring cup when she cooks rice. Her thumb works fine.

Chinook and I both love to explore and travel. The first year she was here, we spent a lot of time exploring the neighborhood, the city, the Puget Sound region, and traveled throughout the west coast. We enjoy long road trips and have planned two more for this year.

We have Directv. However, Chinook has no interest in buying the Filipino channels. She gets her news about 'Pinas online. Also, she wants to sharpen her already-fluent English-language skills by watching English-speaking TV.

Chinook passed the NCLEX-RN in September 2009 and got hired as a charge RN in a long-term care facility where she works with many other Pinoys. She enjoys her job and she is proud of helping to support her widowed mother in 'Pinas.

I'm counting my blessings.

[maximus 0]

My fiancee arrived with her 2 year old daughter just a 2 days ago and we are trying to find any filipino vj members with kids or without to meet and assist in her adjustment.

Mostly for the 2 yo cuz she has separation issues and feelings of sadness n lonelyness cuz in the Phil she can walk outside and play with many kids and neighbors at all hours of the day, she feels lonely cuz her extended family is not her, grandma and grand papa.

We are in the Antioch, CA area and would love to meet anyone within a 60 mile area to hangout with and chat on the phone, if you got young kids that would be a bonus.

Pls send me a message or reply to this post.

God Bless

Edited May 11, 2011 by maximus

[Vizcayana 4]

this post made me emotional for few minutes

I'll be leaving the Philippines to unite with my husband in California ---in Reedley Fresno.

it made me emotional for reason that its really sad to leave the big family behind and adjust to a new different life in a foreign land and later on we will call that HOME.

We Filipinas are tipically born with strong personally and ladies here will agree to that but of course our partners in life are the key factor to help us adapt ourselves to a new environment.

It takes two to tango as they say.

Hopefully I can get myself adjusted soon. My husband already knew what I need and yea its a big rice cooker the number one.

[~happyndinlove~ 540]

Hopefully I can get myself adjusted soon. My husband already knew what I need and yea its a big rice cooker the number one.

With your husband's help and support, I'm sure it won't take you that long to adjust.

I am just fortunate that my husband works at home most of the time. So, us being together all day everyday made the adjustment a lot easier and quickly.

Reading about rice cooker often makes me laugh. We hardly eat rice so we weren't bothered to buy one until we began having visitors.

Edited June 7, 2011 by ~happyndinlove~