Language Barrier

[Colin&Lori 6]

Not sure where to put this as I really couldn't find a suitable forum to place it into...

am not wanting to start any wars or anybody to become angry at my post, its just my general observation and purely my own personal opinion (dons flame-proof vest)

I have read quite a few times about people getting together and having a massive Language Barrier e.g either one or both not knowing each other's Language or very poorly.

but I have always thought that one of the main points of a relationship being successful was communication....yeah there may have fallen in love but how can you truly love/get to know a person if you can't communicate with said person or communicate on a very basic level?

now this is me going O/T (slightly) from want I was saying before but wouldn't it make sense to a degree they introduced a requirement to speak, read and write English? (more so based on becoming a public liability and the ability to get a job)

I mean isn't it only out of respect to learn the country you are going to, to have the ability to speak they native tongue?

I mean if I was going to France to live I would take it upon myself to learn their language to the point where I can speak, read and write to an appropriate and understandable degree.

am sorry if this post angers anyone (but I know people will disagree, but hey that's life everyone has a opinion otherwise life would be boring right? )

Like I said to round things off would like to hear your views on the subject but not to a point where people are just going to argue

(to the mods if this thread goes off the rails please delete and this is something I don't want)

[Samoray 165]

Hello Colin and Lori, i agree with you in that there has to be at least a common language that the couple speak or otherwise you're right how are they going to communicate and get to know each other and love each other but i think about learning the language of the country you're going to live in is not gonna be an easy task of course but at least you should try to do that, my wife is American and the only language she knows is English so if we even planned to live in Egypt i think it would be so hard for her to survive because of the language cause she will have to learn it and i tried to teach her but it is so very hard for her to comprehend it easily specially because Arabic is not written in Latin letters, so it is a very big task and takes a lot of time. another story i have seen a guy who won the diversity lottery and had his interview at the American embassy in Cairo last Thursday, he didn't have a high school diploma and didn't speak English and has no experience at any profession, but yet when he got to the interview the only thing they said they might deny him for was that he doesn't have the least requirements for education but i am thinking would they approve his visa despite him not speaking English ? i mean he is gonna be on his own when he comes to the US so no one will help him at least until he acquire some English, it is gonna be tough of course

Nice topic

[redsnap 13]

Although I speak English quite fluently I still think I am a different person when I speak German. That's kind of funny when I think about it, it's true, but the non native speaker is the person my husband fell in love with. There are things I just can't express or say and there is also a different kind of humor in the English language- not everything can be translated into another language.

I agree that in order to immigrate, someone should try to "fit in" by learning the language, but this is "a must" anyways, if someone wants to find a good job... This doesn't mean that anybody should forget his/her own language, culture and tradition, no... But I think that if you move somewhere, you should speak the language of the people living there and not vice versa...

[krisca 0]

i agree. . . it shows how committed you are to each other. but it should work both ways, learn each others language. . .communication is key,. . .i don't think u have to speak in perfect grammar or write for that matter but just be fluent, you know. have the effort and learn the language, and the same goes with your better half. . .i think it's not only fun but works for benefit of you and ur love one.. .

[Colin&Lori 6]

exactly, I echo with what each of you's have said

which is why it is one of the reasons I have brought this topic to light, I just seen some people bring others into America without the basic abilities of being able to speak English.

not only will this have an effect of the type of job they can get but also limits them into the involvement of the extended community, which in turn could lead to them feeling isolated (which is the case in many of topics I have came across), and of course the effects it will have on the realtionship once it turns into fulltime living together.

[ryna 132]

exactly, I echo with what each of you's have said

which is why it is one of the reasons I have brought this topic to light, I just seen some people bring others into America without the basic abilities of being able to speak English.

not only will this have an effect of the type of job they can get but also limits them into the involvement of the extended community, which in turn could lead to them feeling isolated (which is the case in many of topics I have came across), and of course the effects it will have on the realtionship once it turns into fulltime living together.

You have to consider the whole picture...

My wife is here now and speaks almost no English (although she started English classes yesterday.) When we met, I spoke very little Spanish. Mostly a few words and phrases from being around others who speak Spanish (and English with me.) About 75% of the people in our immediate area speak Spanish (and the vast majority of those English as well) and maybe 20-25% city-wide. She really hasn't been too isolated linguistically in her first few months here. These days, I'm fairly fluent in Spanish, mainly because I wanted to be able to talk to her family and friends when I visit Colombia and, of course, with her. I won't say it was easy but it was fun learning to communicate with each other well. At times, it seemed like we had to create our own language but it worked for us.

That said... Now that she's living in the U.S., even though she could realistically survive where we live using only Spanish, if she wants to attain the same professional level of work in the U.S. that she had in Colombia, she needs to learn English (and learn it well.) The way I see it, if you don't learn English, you are only limiting yourself to working jobs at a certain level and living in certain places.

The good thing is that she wants to learn English for that reason as well as she would like to be able to speak to my family and (non-Spanish speaking) friends just like I did in Colombia. What helped me the most was the collective 3-1/2 months I spent in Colombia last year where I had no choice but to speak Spanish. I think it's unrealistic to expect English fluency upon arrival in the U.S. That comes with time and hearing it spoken and seeing it written on a daily basis.

[Obama 2012 1,714]

I think language is very important. At least the basics to help you get by in public. You don't need to be fluent, but you need to be able to communicate. For your own well being and the well being of others you come into contact with as well.

With that being said, my only problem with people who come into this country and don't know English, is when they use their children to communicate for them. It's sad and pathetic really. If you want to immigrate, then you need to do so with the idea of assimilating into that society. You aren't moving to that nation to continue your life as you lived in your previous nation. You are moving there to be a part of that society and that culture. It would do well by you and those who you come into contact with to show that, even if in the most basic ways.

[one...two...tree 2,762]

The language of love is universal and most people know how to speak it, but couples who can't seem to carry on a conversation never last. Conventional language barriers pale in comparison.

[Pooky 3,694]

I speak English, my wife speaks American.

It's a struggle, I tell you.

[TBoneTX 44,793]

You don't need to be fluent, but you need to be able to communicate.

Whenever I'm in Mexico or Ecuador and I try to say or ask anything in Spanish, people look alarmed and point me toward the nearest restroom.

[redsnap 13]

I speak English, my wife speaks American.

It's a struggle, I tell you.

Yeah all these weird words... autumn, boot instead of trunk... I used to get "punished" in school when I mixed British and American English... Oh boy

[Tim/Mav 305]

Not sure where to put this as I really couldn't find a suitable forum to place it into...

am not wanting to start any wars or anybody to become angry at my post, its just my general observation and purely my own personal opinion (dons flame-proof vest)

I have read quite a few times about people getting together and having a massive Language Barrier e.g either one or both not knowing each other's Language or very poorly.

but I have always thought that one of the main points of a relationship being successful was communication....yeah there may have fallen in love but how can you truly love/get to know a person if you can't communicate with said person or communicate on a very basic level?

now this is me going O/T (slightly) from want I was saying before but wouldn't it make sense to a degree they introduced a requirement to speak, read and write English? (more so based on becoming a public liability and the ability to get a job)

I mean isn't it only out of respect to learn the country you are going to, to have the ability to speak they native tongue?

I mean if I was going to France to live I would take it upon myself to learn their language to the point where I can speak, read and write to an appropriate and understandable degree.

am sorry if this post angers anyone (but I know people will disagree, but hey that's life everyone has a opinion otherwise life would be boring right? )

Like I said to round things off would like to hear your views on the subject but not to a point where people are just going to argue

(to the mods if this thread goes off the rails please delete and this is something I don't want)

I understand what you meant by your topic. But, there are other things to consider. Only a Immagration Consular could make the decision. See, not all people are the same, some are blind, some are mute, some are deaf. Does this mean they can't be in love and have the same rights as you. In the US it is called descrimination. They have every right to migrat if they meet the guildlines as a Couple or Family.

Just a different view.

If people are judgemental about someone's else relationship and are approved bu USCIS or the Country then it is OK with me, They had to go through the same thing you are but with disabilities which makes it harder.

[redsnap 13]

I understand what you meant by your topic. But, there are other things to consider. Only a Immagration Consular could make the decision. See, not all people are the same, some are blind, some are mute, some are deaf. Does this mean they can't be in love and have the same rights as you. In the US it is called descrimination. They have every right to migrat if they meet the guildlines as a Couple or Family.

Just a different view.

If people are judgemental about someone's else relationship and are approved bu USCIS or the Country then it is OK with me, They had to go through the same thing you are but with disabilities which makes it harder.

This is not about anybody being judgemental, or descriminating people with a handicap, since some of them can't talk/hear/see at all.... It's about being part of a new society, being a permanent resident in a different country and about being able to speak English and being willing to adjust to a certain degree and not isolating oneself...

[Tim/Mav 305]

This is not about anybody being judgemental, or descriminating people with a handicap, since some of them can't talk/hear/see at all.... It's about being part of a new society, being a permanent resident in a different country and about being able to speak English and being willing to adjust to a certain degree and not isolating oneself...

I don't want to be a part of that new society where people are shunned out for a handicap. Let say for instance your finacee or wife had a disability but Love oversees that in your eyes. Then, They say: Due to a disability, she cannot enter. Thats not Immagration. Thats Concentration Camps of 1940. Thats not a Society.

A wise man thinks before he speaks.

[redsnap 13]

I don't want to be a part of that new society where people are shunned out for a handicap. Let say for instance your finacee or wife had a disability but Love oversees that in your eyes. Then, They say: Due to a disability, she cannot enter. Thats not Immagration. Thats Concentration Camps of 1940. Thats not a Society.

A wise man thinks before he speaks.

I never said that I think people with handicaps should not be getting a visa. I think they should be treated like anybody else, since there is no reason for them to not get one. The issue was about people that are not handicapped and not willing to open up to a different society.

I wise man reads before he posts...

And making references to the Nazi regime to someone from Austria is more than insensitive. It's not my fault that this madness happened in my country, but you obviously just see what you want to see and make really insulting comments here...