Funny things courtesy of your partner

[thongd4me 69]

My biggest surprise has always been just how much of a "language" barrier there is between England and America. I think the biggest difference is that in England we are so innundated with American tv series that we pick up and learn the different words used.

Obviously, in America there is not such a large amount of British tv shown, and so many Americans dont have a clue what im on about, and it leads to the insane hand gestures and weird explainations to try and get my point across!

The biggest one that Nick and I manage to turn into full blown conversations over a simple question is a broiler. In England a broiler is a grill. In America a grill is a BBQ. I cant tell you how many times ive told Nick to put some toast under the grill and he looks at me like a mad woman!

For some reason a tough one for Americans to understand coming from me is "Vodka and Coke". I dont think I have ever successfully ordered one myself, instead having to have a friend step in and explain what im on about!

Then there are the usual of trousers/pants, sneakers/trainers...

Apparently we dont speak the same language!

Ha ha. When my wife saw the grill inside the gas oven she also assumed it was a GRILL!

In any case the smoke detectors gave her more insight into what was what.

[luckytxn 2,265]

Not long ago we were driving along and a turtle was crossing the road and I and someone else in the next lane stopped to let it cross. My wife finally said that the turtle was lucky to be here where we live. I of course thought she meant that it was lucky that I didn't run over it as I did want to but I asked her why? She said that in Vietnam that she would or someone else would have ran and grabbed it and taken it home to eat. I thought about it and thought that the turtle was indeed lucky to be living here and not there. Of course as we drove on I saw a dog and said that the dog was lucky to be here too and she said yes it was. Later I asked about various other animals we saw as the day went on like a cat and duck and some such as that and the answer was always yes.

[thongd4me 69]

I've noticed over a period of time my wife employs an "odd" selection of tools for various tasks.

I guess her rule is when the job has to be done, pick up whatever is at hand.

I'm in the process of re-wallpapering the kitchen as my wife has selected a new pattern that she wants.

I started stripping the old cruddy stuff from the wall using a putty knife.

A few seconds later, I see my wife at the other end of the kitchen, lending a hand.

I could have given her a putty knife but she was wielding a STEAK KNIFE!

Oh well, she gets an "E" for effort...

[AmyWrites 593]

Mine have been mainly about communication since we're not able to move to the US right now.

Like, once, he called me a "bad person"... this was when his english wasn't very good. Of course I lost it, in reality he meant I was "unlucky"; I had been telling him some bad things that happened in my life.

Or he would talk about moving to the US like the visa process is just so easy

So this means I'll make fun of myself instead since I have little to say about my SO. I'd never lived in a place that was as cold as Moscow before. Which means that of course I spent my fist winter slipping on snow, washing the snow off the car with water (yeah, that was a brilliant moment in my life), and wearing "coats" that were a hell lot more fashion than function.

[thongd4me 69]

Mine have been mainly about communication since we're not able to move to the US right now.

Like, once, he called me a "bad person"... this was when his english wasn't very good. Of course I lost it, in reality he meant I was "unlucky"; I had been telling him some bad things that happened in my life.

Or he would talk about moving to the US like the visa process is just so easy

So this means I'll make fun of myself instead since I have little to say about my SO.

I'd never lived in a place that was as cold as Moscow before.

Which means that of course I spent my fist winter slipping on snow, washing the snow off the car with water

(yeah, that was a brilliant moment in my life), and wearing "coats" that were a hell lot more fashion than function.

The USC has to have lots of care & patience to have a good life with someone who has English as a 2nd language.

I have been around foreign folks for most of my life so marrying someone whose English wasn't perfect came more naturally

to me than most.

I can't count the times when she has said things that on the surface sound insulting or inappropriate but every one of them

have an explanation which usually you don't have to go very far to find the translation miscue that caused it.

They are usually words that have similar sounds or a part of a syllable being mispronounced that results in a malaprop.

Archie Bunker, being from Brooklyn, was often a source of such confusion to his family members.

[TBoneTX 46,311]

They are usually words that have similar sounds or a part of a syllable being mispronounced that results in a malaprop.

A couple around here are "sheet" and "beach, oof man.

[Ban Hammer 13,673]

A couple around here are "sheet" and "beach, oof man.

same here

[TBoneTX 46,311]

All the lol is gone, sigh man... I left off a closing " in the post above, oof man. Ready; set... self-flagellate, si man.

Wasn't Flagellan the explorer who sailed around the Cape of Good Horn, huh, man?

Edited March 22, 2011 by TBoneTX

[Chamy and Gatita 3]

I love reading everything that you all shared. I wish I could remember every funny thing my husband does and start a blog, but unfortunately I don't have that kind of brainpower.

Regarding mispronounced words, I finally started translating his mispronunciations into Spanish for him, so he could really understand how funny (or odd) it sounds. He tends to leave off the last consonant of words: for example, "word" is pronounced "were", "went" is pronounced "when" and so on. "u" is always pronounced "oo": we had a good laugh when Penelope Cruz's character in Nacho Libre said she loves "poopies" (puppies).

But a lot of my husband's funny things have to do with culture-- he had an uncanny ability to point out things about American life that would never ever occur to me. Like when we had to take the car to the mechanic and he found out they removed what was broken and put a new part in. He was shocked! He said, you don't fix cars in the United States! He got all righteous and I could not for the life of me figure out what he was talking about. Like the one person mentioned, every point of confusion usually leads to a logical explanation (I loved the "you are a bad person" story). So i probed- what do you mean, we don't fix cars here? The car got fixed, so what do you mean? Finally I got his point: he was shocked to discover that we don't *fix* parts, we *replace* them, and for him, there is a BIG difference. How many Americans would ever think of that??? I love his observations.

[TBoneTX 46,311]

He tends to leave off the last consonant of words

He's from, or grew up in, Guayaquil, si man? The very same happens here, si man. It's hopeless. "What color is this tie, Mrs. T-B.?" "It's gree." We nearly had a fight once when I kept asking where my pants were, and she kept pointing to a basket of pens.

we don't *fix* parts, we *replace* them, and for him, there is a BIG difference.

Mama-Mrs.-T-B. is about to end her 2.5-month visit here. I'd love to ask her some of the things that stuck out the most. She's not super-expressive, but I did catch her reactions to the automatic car-wash that I took her through (inside the car with me, youse guys!), and to our automatic dishwasher, and to the fact that here there is ONE garbageman, versus 10 or 12 to a truck in Ecuador.

She did, and does, consider it different that Daffodil the Cat is considered to be a member of the family (by me, anyway), rather than just an animal. She thinks that it's hilarious when I point to the cat and say "Su nieta" (your granddaughter), si man. In Ecuador, they return the favor by putting guinea pigs ("cuy") on the dinner menu. In the U.S., we don't eat our pets!

These are cultural differences that are pretty funny, at least to me, si man.

[SunAngel 0]

Obviously I don't have any stories for us living together yet (neither of us are in the states, or even in the same country for that matter) and he understands me quite well since he lived in the US for 3 years (I do have to explain things to him once in a while) and he does make fun of me when I say "banana"...

But when we were first dating, he was over and I was going to cook something. I asked him if he was hungry, and he says, "I'll eat just now." So I prepare meals for both of us and he doesn't touch it. "Aren't you hungry?" I ask him. "Yeah, I'll eat just now." "So, like... now?"

So then he explains to me what "just now" means to South Africans... basically it means later, either 10 minutes from now or a few hours from now. Ugh. So now I know if I hear "just now" just assume it's going to happen tomorrow.

[Chamy and Gatita 3]

He's from, or grew up in, Guayaquil, si man? The very same happens here, si man. It's hopeless. "What color is this tie, Mrs. T-B.?" "It's gree." We nearly had a fight once when I kept asking where my pants were, and she kept pointing to a basket of pens.

and to the fact that here there is ONE garbageman, versus 10 or 12 to a truck in Ecuador.

Hilarious stuff. My husband is from Quito. A long time ago I asked him about the practice of dropping the last consonant, and he said that back home, pronouncing everything effectively makes you sound mentally retarded.

Here: ice cream trucks wander neighborhoods, playing their tinny amplified music to let us know they are coming. There: you hear that same soundtrack and you run out and it's the......garbage truck. Yuck!

[TBoneTX 46,311]

My husband is from Quito.

Well, THEY know how to finish their words, si man! In another gringo/Ecuatoriana couple whom I know, the wife (from Quito) finishes her English words, too, sigh man.

A long time ago I asked him about the practice of dropping the last consonant, and he said that back home, pronouncing everything effectively makes you sound mentally retarded.

Now, this is a first, and it sounds like an excuse from a would-be Guayaco. I must ask Mrs. T-B. if there's a kernel, or a grain, of truth to it. One would think that pronouncing everything effectively would make one sound like a newscaster, si man.

In regard to the garbage trucks, at least people won't rob them, no man.

Edited March 26, 2011 by TBoneTX