Anyone else have a hard time?

[British_Cupcake 1]

Just wondering if anyone else who immigrated to America had a hard time adjusting?

Im use to moving around as i am a military brat but when i moved to America i had a really hard time adjusting. I started suffering with Anxiety and depression. There are certain things i just cant get my head around and i have never really felt 'safe' in America even though we have a security system set up in our house.

If anyone else had issues please share.

[canadian_wife 1,829]

I get how you feel. I lived in the US before, in this same house actually, before I immigrated and I still feel anxious and on edge. I think it is natural

Good luck

[YuAndDan 153]

Big adjustment for my wife, big culture shock coming from China.

[British_Cupcake 1]

I get how you feel. I lived in the US before, in this same house actually, before I immigrated and I still feel anxious and on edge. I think it is natural

Good luck

Im glad i am not the only one..i guess it doesnt help knowing out neighbour got out of prison just as we moved into the house for shooting i the neighbourhood.

Big adjustment for my wife, big culture shock coming from China.

I cant imagine, could she speak good english? i atleast didnt have a language barrier. How has she learned to cope?

[YuAndDan 153]

I cant imagine, could she speak good english? i atleast didnt have a language barrier. How has she learned to cope?

English was fair, she was a teacher and principle at a language school. So it was not too difficult adjusting language-wise, we did get plugged into the mandarin speaking community in our area so that helps allot.

[J&N* 68]

You're definitely not alone, there were nights here I wouldn't sleep at all cause I'd be very anxious and just freaking out, I was also missing my family so much I cried every night and even had fights with my husband because of it, heck, I cried because of anxiety even during our honeymoon. It is still hard to adjust and get my head around certain things. My husband had to travel for a few days for work and I totally freaked out and I had to stay at my in laws cause I couldn't even fall asleep.

I'm doing better now and I think it gets better with time, little by little. The one thing I ask myself when I get scared is, why would anyone be after me? I'm fairly boring and not rich

[Penguin_ie 5,997]

You are definitely not alone. My first year here was very difficult, I had fights with my husband all the time and fantasised about leaving. Even packed my bags once. For me it wasn't so much safety as culture shock (despite visiting many times), coming from liberal Dublin city, Ireland to bible belt, Arkansas. I basically went from being the right-winger in my group of friends to being the leftie hippy for my in-laws, and it took me a loooong time to make friends. The car culture and pervasive nature of Evangelical Christianity around here was also very difficult.

[Cybele 0]

You are definitely not alone. My first year here was very difficult, I had fights with my husband all the time and fantasised about leaving. Even packed my bags once. For me it wasn't so much safety as culture shock (despite visiting many times), coming from liberal Dublin city, Ireland to bible belt, Arkansas. I basically went from being the right-winger in my group of friends to being the leftie hippy for my in-laws, and it took me a loooong time to make friends. The car culture and pervasive nature of Evangelical Christianity around here was also very difficult.

I am the USC in this CR1 case, but I just wanted to say that none of you are alone. I've been with my husband for several years, have visited Trinidad for month long visits, and moved to Trinidad to be with my husband over a year ago. After 6 months in Trinidad I begged him to come to the US instead. Trinidad is english speaking, so communication wasn't the issue, but cultures are always different and life changes are difficult.

Anxiety, depression, fear, you name it and we've all had it.

I pray that my husband gets visa approval in March because I don't know if I could do it again. I can't be with him during the interview, but I intend to make a video of myself, family, and friends saying that exact same thing.

[Brother Hesekiel 2,236]

Just wondering if anyone else who immigrated to America had a hard time adjusting?

Im use to moving around as i am a military brat but when i moved to America i had a really hard time adjusting. I started suffering with Anxiety and depression. There are certain things i just cant get my head around and i have never really felt 'safe' in America even though we have a security system set up in our house.

If anyone else had issues please share.

Not to come over as a smart a*s (I probably do anyway), but you live in . . . . gasp . . . Chicago, Al Capone's headquarters?

I've never, ever felt unsafe here in California, except when I cruised East L.A. after dark back in the mid-90s. I guess it's more a question of the neighborhood you live in, then the country. There are very desirable and very crappy neighborhoods about everywhere, in the US as well as in other countries, save for Monaco.

Edited February 25, 2011 by Just Bob

[silvana.toma 15]

Let me put it this way...we are trying to buy a house in a very good area, and the first thing that crossed my mind to buy once we get the house are: 1. a gun and 2. put security dors on two of the doors.

I am a security freak, because i believe that all the people who died in their homes(good neighbourhoods or not)NEVER in a million years thought that will happen to them. So it's always better to be safe than sorry...well you will not even be sorry because you will be dead.

Every country has issues and i don't think that America is the perfect country, but it's a lot more practical to people's needs than most countries out there.

I am still adjusting and i have been here for 8 months, and have been in US many.. many times, it's a process, it will not happen in a week, or a month...

[British_Cupcake 1]

Not to come over as a smart a*s (I probably do anyway), but you live in . . . . gasp . . . Chicago, Al Capone's headquarters?

I've never, ever felt unsafe here in California, except when I cruised East L.A. after dark back in the mid-90s. I guess it's more a question of the neighborhood you live in, then the country. There are very desirable and very crappy neighborhoods about everywhere, in the US as well as in other countries, save for Monaco.

Not exactly Bob but i live in a neighbourhood with a lot of crime. Clarksville isnt exactly the bronx but its ghetto. My neighbour got out of jail not long before we moved there because he shot around in our street. Not a week goes buy that there isnt a drive by or a body found or someone was raped or what not. I walked around the neigbourhood with a friend one night because i was having problems and needed some fresh air..We got told by a bunch of chicks that it was THEIR turf and we needed to leave..Like im some hoe..Pardon my language but this feeds my anxiety.

Edited February 26, 2011 by Jonswifey

[james&olya 1,121]

Not exactly Bob but i live in a neighbourhood with a lot of crime. Clarksville isnt exactly the bronx but its ghetto. My neighbour got out of jail not long before we moved there because he shot around in our street. Not a week goes buy that there isnt a drive by or a body found or someone was raped or what not. I walked around the neigbourhood with a friend one night because i was having problems and needed some fresh air..We got told by a bunch of chicks that it was THEIR turf and we needed to leave..Like im some hoe..Pardon my language but this feeds my anxiety.

Please don't believe that it is like that everywhere in the US! Where I live (and many other places are the same) it is very safe! Many people never bother to lock their doors. Cars are left un-locked with the keys in them and they don't get stolen. The crime logs generally consist of a few dui's and the occasional alcohol related dv. Now and then someone is caught shop-lifting. I think you need to move away from there. Life is too short to live in fear. No job can be that good to justify that sort of existence!

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

Please don't believe that it is like that everywhere in the US! Where I live (and many other places are the same) it is very safe! Many people never bother to lock their doors. Cars are left un-locked with the keys in them and they don't get stolen. The crime logs generally consist of a few dui's and the occasional alcohol related dv. Now and then someone is caught shop-lifting. I think you need to move away from there. Life is too short to live in fear. No job can be that good to justify that sort of existence!

Here also! We do not even have locks on the doors ( mean we HAVE no locks, not locks that we never use)

Adjustment is normal. I think the first year to year and a half are the worst. Maybe 6 months to one year is the worst. The first few months you are just newlyweds and, well...newlyweds...who cares about anything else?

Everyone has their own issues. Crime or being safe was not one of Alla's problems (though she had some unreasonable fears of bears, deer, moose and all the wild animals running around, it took her a while just to grasp the concept of animals that were "wild")

But you adjust to a "new normal".

[J&N* 68]

If you're renting that house, you gotta try and move out, no house is that worth it, you need your peace of mind and you need to feel safe where you live and one day have kids.

I know a couple who found a gorgeous house for a great price in an AMAZING DREAM neighborhood, made an offer and decided to drive by it, and they saw an old creepy man sitting in the garage all the time, watching people, the couple decided not to buy the house after that. We went to look for a house in that neighborhood and we saw him sitting there, he went and ran after our car just so he can PEAK at us!!

They say you should buy the smallest house you can afford, in the best neighborhood you can find, you can change anything about the house, but you can't change your neighbors.

[British_Cupcake 1]

oops next post..

Edited February 27, 2011 by Jonswifey