Meeting Up in a Third Country

[tcTTct 37]

No visa needed for Thailand, Singapore, Malaysia

[Teacher Mark 53]

The ASEAN member nations have an agreement that allows residents of one country to travel to the other countries "visa free". Only a passport is required.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Visa_requirements_for_Vietnamese_citizens

[JimVaPhuong 4,863]

Ok, so the options are...

1. She was lying to me.

2. She didn't know she could go to Singapore without a visa.

3. She didn't want to go to Singapore, and was trying to find an easy way to weasel out.

We ended up taking most of her family to Hoi An and Da Nang in a big bus we rented. No way I would have paid to do that if we went to Singapore, Thailand, Taiwan, or anywhere else.

I'm going with option 3.

[VinhBao MyTam 3]

Ok, so the options are...

1. She was lying to me.

2. She didn't know she could go to Singapore without a visa.

3. She didn't want to go to Singapore, and was trying to find an easy way to weasel out.

We ended up taking most of her family to Hoi An and Da Nang in a big bus we rented. No way I would have paid to do that if we went to Singapore, Thailand, Taiwan, or anywhere else.

I'm going with option 3.

ooo, or option 4... it changed after your trip?

Option 3 does sound very Vietnamese... (and to our ears, suspiciously similar to option 1)

Edited February 20, 2011 by VinhBao MyTam

[BinhJerome 14]

Ok, so the options are...

1. She was lying to me.

2. She didn't know she could go to Singapore without a visa.

3. She didn't want to go to Singapore, and was trying to find an easy way to weasel out.

We ended up taking most of her family to Hoi An and Da Nang in a big bus we rented. No way I would have paid to do that if we went to Singapore, Thailand, Taiwan, or anywhere else.

I'm going with option 3.

Hmmmmm..... I take it you wanted to go to Singapore with your wife and she said she had to get a visa. Hmmmmmm............ Possibly she didnt know or she would rather have a nice family trip with you and her family :whistle: Well when you go back you can now for certain with her newly acquired american status visit Singapore.

[JimVaPhuong 4,863]

Option 3 does sound very Vietnamese... (and to our ears, suspiciously similar to option 1)

Odd, isn't it?

I've noticed some pretty striking differences in the morality of Vietnamese and Americans. Many Vietnamese have a sense that a lie isn't immoral if the goal you're trying achieve is noble. I know quite a few Vietnamese people here who don't have any problem lying on a government form if it will get them a benefit they wouldn't otherwise be eligible for. It took me an hour to explain to one of Phuong's cousins why this was wrong.

Hmmmmm..... I take it you wanted to go to Singapore with your wife and she said she had to get a visa. Hmmmmmm............ Possibly she didnt know or she would rather have a nice family trip with you and her family :whistle: Well when you go back you can now for certain with her newly acquired american status visit Singapore.

She was all for having a holiday away from Hue, but yeah - I think she really wanted to share the fun with her family.

We'll be going back for the first time this summer. She'll probably want to stay for a couple of months, but I doubt I'll be able to get more than a few weeks off. If I manage to talk her into a holiday away from Hue then she'll probably want to at least bring her eldest daughter, her step-son, and her granddaughter along.

We have a Vietnamese Buddhist temple here in our town, and she goes there every week. The Su Phu and a couple of the nuns came to visit today, and they said we should visit Ha Long bay next time we go back. Phuong seemed to like that idea.

[VinhBao MyTam 3]

Odd, isn't it?

I've noticed some pretty striking differences in the morality of Vietnamese and Americans. Many Vietnamese have a sense that a lie isn't immoral if the goal you're trying achieve is noble. I know quite a few Vietnamese people here who don't have any problem lying on a government form if it will get them a benefit they wouldn't otherwise be eligible for. It took me an hour to explain to one of Phuong's cousins why this was wrong.

She was all for having a holiday away from Hue, but yeah - I think she really wanted to share the fun with her family.

Jim, the stories I could tell... I've come to actually think that it's not so much the morality of it as somehow to them it is in some way true.

Example: I once talked to a military guy recovering bodies. They went to a village where there was a rumor of a helicopter and someone gave them a helicopter blade part. They asked if there was anything else and the guy with the blade said no. On the way back to their chopper, one of the military guys almost tripped over something & sure enough it was part of a helicopter. They scoured the village and nearly reassembled the entire helicopter with what they found. When they asked the guy who had said there was nothing else, his response was that there was nothing else in that part of his house where they were standing when asked... I don't see any motive to lie there. Simply a different idea of presenting the truth.

But you're right. Even very 'moral' people on some of these things we think are obvious, it doesn't click as such for them.

Re: wanting to share the vaca with family. Yes, I think it's because to Viet's, people are much more important than places.

[VinceN 25]

We have a Vietnamese Buddhist temple here in our town, and she goes there every week. The Su Phu and a couple of the nuns came to visit today, and they said we should visit Ha Long bay next time we go back. Phuong seemed to like that idea.

Jim, I highly recommend Ha Long bay, I took a vacation in VN with my ex-gf in 2008 and that was one of our destinations. It was an experience to remember.

Re: wanting to share the vaca with family. Yes, I think it's because to Viet's, people are much more important than places.

This is very true, more so with traditional women.

[JimVaPhuong 4,863]

Jim, I highly recommend Ha Long bay, I took a vacation in VN with my ex-gf in 2008 and that was one of our destinations. It was an experience to remember.

Yeah, I've heard the same, though lately people are advising against the overnight boats.

http://washingtonexaminer.com/news/world/2011/02/vietnam-tour-boat-sunk-because-broken-pipe

This has been on the SBTN news for the last couple of days. Very sad.

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I lived in Hanoi for 3 1/2 years and can vouch for Ha Long Bay. They have some fantastic overnight boats there. Also, the overnight "Victoria Train" to Sapa is also well worth it.