failed k1 im manila

[pushbrk 12,889]

thanks for clearing that up as i said has been a few years since i filed for him i remembered some sort of question about it but was not sure exact what it did say.......but i do believe that should be question on the petition that is filled out...would save a lot of people heart ache

sara

Not likely to happen, since it's the US Citizen's petition. It's a good question for a visa application though or a G325a.

[pushbrk 12,889]

I have an alternate view of this particular situation. Although it's impossible for me to know what was actually in the mind of the beneficiary in this case, I know there's more than one possible explanation. One that come to my mind is that Filipina's are Asian, and as such, feel the Asian (far from exclusive) need to save face. She may well love the petitioner dearly and feel embarrassed about the previous relationship.

In my experience with the Asian culture, the people don't think of omissions intended to save face in the same way the think of intentional deceit. I tend to give the benefit of the doubt in such cases and try to approach the problem somewhat more pragmatically than most of the respondents to this thread. That's not to say they're wrong, just that I'm not so sure.

[PhilAmTx 14]

i had the same situation also,i had an x american bf,broke up 2 years ago.. i found my love a year ago and we file k1 visa last dec. but since i RESPECT HIM AND LOVE HIM AS MUCH AS HE DO. I WAS TELLING HIM THE WHOLE TRUTH..WHY AND HOW WE BROKE UP. he understand me.. i told him before his first visit in PHilippines. be cause i want him to know all about my past from me not from other people.and now we dont have any problem regarding our relationship. and i understand some vj,s member advices.. take it.. im a filipina too and i know how important trust and honesty in a relationship. i can tell shes not honest. she is fake..you visited her and met her family and friends, well i can tell that she was telling everybody not to mention it to you.everything was a lie... so get rid of her..im sorry if i sound mean but i fell sorry for foreigners who met gold digger ambitious filpina. :(

[XXXXXXYYYY 1]

I have an alternate view of this particular situation. Although it's impossible for me to know what was actually in the mind of the beneficiary in this case, I know there's more than one possible explanation. One that come to my mind is that Filipina's are Asian, and as such, feel the Asian (far from exclusive) need to save face. She may well love the petitioner dearly and feel embarrassed about the previous relationship.

In my experience with the Asian culture, the people don't think of omissions intended to save face in the same way the think of intentional deceit. I tend to give the benefit of the doubt in such cases and try to approach the problem somewhat more pragmatically than most of the respondents to this thread. That's not to say they're wrong, just that I'm not so sure.

Being married to an Asian (Nepali) I know and understand this to be true as well. If things are not directly asked, they are sometimes not shared at all.

I am not asian, but I also feel reluctant to share every part about my past relationships with my husband. He does not ask a lot of questions about them (due to his culture) and I don't offer excessive information. I hope to have learned from my past mistakes and not have to relive them.

I don't know this girl's intentions, but when you love someone, sometimes it is scary to tell about things that may cause you to lose them.

This visa thing tends to make us all a little more paranoid about questioning someone's motives.

[PhilAmTx 14]

Being married to an Asian (Nepali) I know and understand this to be true as well. If things are not directly asked, they are sometimes not shared at all.

I am not asian, but I also feel reluctant to share every part about my past relationships with my husband. He does not ask a lot of questions about them (due to his culture) and I don't offer excessive information. I hope to have learned from my past mistakes and not have to relive them.

I don't know this girl's intentions, but when you love someone, sometimes it is scary to tell about things that may cause you to lose them.

This visa thing tends to make us all a little more paranoid about questioning someone's motives.

no matter how bad your past was,you should tell him about it,if he loves you he will understand,accept and loves you still.

[SimplyMacy 4]

no matter how bad your past was,you should tell him about it,if he loves you he will understand,accept and loves you still.

I agree with Mdclary39 and you.. Yes it's true that no matter how bad is your past, we should be open enough to our significant other. ..especially those things that matters in a relationship and the future. Past is past and we cant do anything about it but Learn. Some people deserve a second chance but others don't.

I hope as a petitioner, you'll find out the whole truth and move on with your life. The sun will always shine after the rain! If this is just a great trial in your relationship, I'm sure everything will work out for you both. Try to talk to her and contact the previous petitioner and ask to withdraw the petition. Another problem here is if she lied during the interview, she is subject to permanently/temporarily be barred to enter the U.S. Interview is a sworn statement...to tell nothing but the TRUTH. If you decide to reopen your case, you may need an immigrant lawyer. All the best!

Edited January 29, 2011 by SimplyMacy

[Pedro Thiago 2]

Being married to an Asian (Nepali) I know and understand this to be true as well. If things are not directly asked, they are sometimes not shared at all.

I am not asian, but I also feel reluctant to share every part about my past relationships with my husband. He does not ask a lot of questions about them (due to his culture) and I don't offer excessive information. I hope to have learned from my past mistakes and not have to relive them.

I don't know this girl's intentions, but when you love someone, sometimes it is scary to tell about things that may cause you to lose them.

This visa thing tends to make us all a little more paranoid about questioning someone's motives.

I agree with the sentiments about Asian (non-exclusive) culture and trying to save face. I had to learn how to communicate with my fiance about things that she didn't necesarily want to talk about, but we have been able to have conversations on serious issues that needed to be discussed even when one or the other of us lost face. I don't think I would be able to trust her if she had been hiding a previous engagement to an American followed up with the decision to marry me in such a short time span. I have a rather frank Thai friend who came over on the K1 who has told me a few horror stories about friends getting their green cards and running wild afterwards. She advised me to think very carefully about the type of girl that I am bringing over to the States. Luckily for me, my fiance was initially surprised and hesitant when I told her I wanted to bring her over to America and she wouldn't make a decision until she had discussed it with her family and friends and thought it over for a few weeks. Looking back, that was the best reaction I could have hoped for, though it wasn't what I expected!

[JimVaPhuong 4,863]

This brings up a question I have in a similar situation in which I have a question. I cannot find on this web site on when a petition expires. Or how long, with no action taken on the petition, does it expire.

The reason why is one was filed for my gal over a year ago by another guy. The guy vanished and stopped contacting her for no reason. She never received any notice from him or the UCSIS if the petition was canceled or withdrawn.

Does anyone know or who do we contact to verify?

Thanks.

Sorry, your question seems to have gotten lost in the shuffle.

An approved petition is valid for four months. A US consulate has the authority to extend the approval in four month increments, and they'll often do so automatically. They usually won't extend the approval more than one year beyond the date it was originally approved.

Once a petition is submitted to USCIS, unless an RFE is issued at some point, no further action is required from the petitioner. If USCIS approves it then it will go to NVC, and ultimately to the consulate. In that case, she would need to know the consulate's case number (assigned by NVC) in order to find out if the petition has expired. If the petitioner withdrew the petition before it was approved then it's not likely either one of you would be able to find out anything about it.

[MikeandJaq 0]

Sorry but its very impossible that she get inlove again for 2nd time around for just a couple a month after her first man they broke up,im not being judgemental person but i saw her, shes only want to go here in US,in realationship u being honest each other then u will tell everything whats happening to your life even that the pastlife its so bad...Better ask her literally if she love you or just only papers she want ...

[Aztec&Taino 144]

Sorry but its very impossible that she get inlove again for 2nd time around for just a couple a month after her first man they broke up,im not being judgemental person but i saw her, shes only want to go here in USin realationship u being honest each other then u will tell everything whats happening to your life even that the pastlife its so bad...Better ask her literally if she love you or just only papers she want ...

Do you mean in the bolded statement that you know the beneficiary and know her true intentions? Wouldn't this be fascinating! I think that what you mean to say is that you believe that her true motivation is to come to the USA, but do not know this for sure...

In regards to the italicized sentence fragment, does it really ever work to ask a person to be honest in order for them to be honest? Really, there is not objective way for the OP to find out the beneficiary's "real intentions," I think with love we are all taking a chance. In this case, however, the case is screaming RED FLAG and the petitioner should be very well aware of this if he chooses to continue the relationship.

Best wishes!

Edited January 29, 2011 by Aztec&Taino

[Lisamarie 79]

The fact that she pulled the application in the first K1 because her fiance wouldn't accept her family tells me that she wasn't only looking for a green card "in that relationship". Because if she was, and was planning to leave after getting it (or adjusting status I guess), why would she care if he accepted her family or not? Seems to me that wouldn't have been an issue in her mind.

I don't know the circumstances in your relationship, where and when did you meet? Does the timeline cross when she would've still been in a relationship with him? How did you start talking about marriage? Did you approach her or did she approach you? Did you meet her 6 months after her breakup with the other man and then start a relationship? If you met after 6 months and started talking, and if it later formed into a relationship, I don't think that is automatically suspicious either. She may have mourned the relationship for 3 or 4 months and told herself to move on with her life. Who knows....you don't say enough about it in your post so I'm just speculating...

That being said, I do agree with everyone that you need to get the former petitioner's name from her by telling her that you want to ask him to close the petition (or whatever the process is for that) and call him and ask him questions. Maybe that's sneaky but at this point you have every right to protect yourself and make a decision if you want to proceed with the relationship or not.

I don't think a person has to divulge every single relationship they've had in the past, the past is the past. But the fact that it was serious enough that he petitioned for her, she should've told you about that. I flat out asked my husband when we started talking serious if anyone had ever petitioned for him before and he said no, that he only had friends before but no serious relationships. I didn't want any surprises later on......

How is she taking this? Is she saying it's over or does she want to continue?

Good luck to you.

hello people...have not been here for a while..yesterday my girl had her interview and was denied because of a pitition that another man had started..i was unaware of this and she told me that she thought it was done and over with..she said it only cleared nvc but she pulled from relationship because of problems that he would not accept her family and was wanting no part of them.so this brought me into picture as new petioner after 6 months.i have been there to visit her and family a total of five weeks and in two trips.she is unsure if our case is closed but was denied because of old case.is there anything that i can do to get old case removed?i am dissapointed she never said anything to me of this but she says she was afraid that i would turn on her for this.i do understand her thinking but i told her that paper trail is in system and she should have known this when we first filed in laguna,ca.i am at loss to know what to do now..any help would be greatly appreciated please.

Edited January 29, 2011 by Lisamarie

[tallcoolone 102]

RUN, and do not look back

[jeraldgefre 0]

Sorry but its very impossible that she get inlove again for 2nd time around for just a couple a month after her first man they broke up,im not being judgemental person but i saw her, shes only want to go here in US,in realationship u being honest each other then u will tell everything whats happening to your life even that the pastlife its so bad...Better ask her literally if she love you or just only papers she want ...

are you telling me that you know her?if so plese write me.she had told me that she was afraid to tell me and she has never asked for anything ,i know she is dedicated to her family in ormoc and has worked at same job for over 10 years.whitch she now lost due to resignation to get her money for leaving.30 day notice.if you know maria or of her please contact me.

[MikeandJaq 0]

of course i dont know her i'm giving advice like everyone else does here. and she has a record now at the US embassy in manila.Now one thing u should be do is contact the her ex fiance and get the lawyer to fixed ur problem in US embassy manila...

are you telling me that you know her?if so plese write me.she had told me that she was afraid to tell me and she has never asked for anything ,i know she is dedicated to her family in ormoc and has worked at same job for over 10 years.whitch she now lost due to resignation to get her money for leaving.30 day notice.if you know maria or of her please contact me.

[Tero 105]

OP, you do not need a lawyer until you have re-established a legit relationship with her (which I hope you don't). Maybe you should find out what questions they asked her at the embassy and what answers she gave. They might have asked her if she had been filed for before and she denied. That would affect you. Those who have argued that not all needs to be disclosed in a relationship; Would you rather find out your lover's dark past from a third party or from him/her? If your wife confessed to you she had slept with a couple of guys in the past for money, sure you would be pissed, but the fact that she told you herself would make you see she regrets and is honest. If you had to find out from a third party before she admits it, how can you ever trust her again? You'd believe there are probably worse secrets she's hiding.

Also, the fact that the OP's fiancée told him she was the one that cut off the previous relationship does not mean that is actually how it happened. How can you trust what comes from someone who has deceived you thus far? OP needs to find out the truth from the previous guy. Maybe the previous guy found out there was a previous guy as well and baled.

Ultimately, the decision is the OP's to make. Weigh the odds with reasoning. Take the chance, spend more and regret later, or find another and approach with lessons learned from this so you wouldn't make the same mistake again. Before you propose, be sure to know everything possible about her so you don't get any future surprises. Choice is yours, good luck.

Edited January 30, 2011 by Tero