Abuse of power in the American Consulate

[Sunny123 44]

Is it just me or was that not on topic???

Isnt the topic a conversation about whether there is truly an abuse of power in the us consulate in casa or if they are just detecting fraud to the best of their ability?

They don't have even have a SO from MENA. "Please ignore the man behind the curtain." The Wizzard.

Edited February 28, 2011 by Sunny123

[msheesha 548]

Is that a prerequisite for the conversation?

I didn't realize that.

[Sunny123 44]

Is that a prerequisite for the conversation?

I didn't realize that.

I wasn't aiming that at you.

[KittyPollitt 284]

I wasn't aiming that at you.

Hay!! You don't even have an SO from MENA! ..o wait, that's been said.. uh... those posts were TOTALLY on topic. Yeah.

[msheesha 548]

@sunny I realize it wasn't directed towards me but still don't understand the issue.

@squeaky I agree. Thought it was all topic related as well.

[Beauty for Ashes 257]

LOL...It's like they're saying, "Yeah, I married a Nash Rambler. Hung on to her a few years and traded her in for an Infiniti. That's just how I roll."

At least I got a beautiful daughter out of his screwing over the puerto rican in NY for papers.. its so weird.. shes my facebook friend Staashi. if you are in Orlando again, Ill show you her.. Its so weird. I thank her every day for my daughter. If she had not flown to Morocco, wasted 2 years of her life and gotten screwed over by him , I wouldnt have my daughter.. He always says YOU AMERICANS SCREWED ME.. I have to ask him, DUDE HOW SO? Oh because someone got something out of you ? A beautiful daughter? You betcha

[Jenn! 918]

They felt VERY strongly that any "serious" Moroccan man wouldn't be online or on the street trolling for a woman, and would instead arrange for a meeting with an appropriate (young, attractive, pious, etc.) woman through respectful channels, like having his relatives talk to her and her relatives on his behalf.

What about old and/or ugly and/or not-so-pious Moroccan women? Are they SOL?

[Sunny123 44]

Hay!! You don't even have an SO from MENA! ..o wait, that's been said.. uh... those posts were TOTALLY on topic. Yeah.

My guy lives in Switzerland but is a Tunisian Citizen.

Edited February 28, 2011 by Sunny123

[msheesha 548]

Nobody's been off topic except for you Sunny123...

Back to topic right back atcha!

[Lisamarie 79]

I think there is way too much generalizing about Moroccan men though. That would be like saying American men look for x,y, and z, "only" If they're not looking for that, they're not real. Moroccan men are individuals, just like everywhere else in the world, and I don't believe they fit into a mold. I feel like my husband and his family are the completely "untypical" Moroccan family, going by what you ladies are listing as the typical or normal Moroccan family. Out of all of his brothers and sisters, only two are married, one on his second marriage with kids from a previous marriage. The other that is married has no children. Two sisters living at home, one divorced with young children, one divorced with an adult child, and one (40 and very pretty) never married....three older brothers never married. We didn't meet on a dating site, we met on a social site, and I approached him and gave him a friend request.

I do believe that there are many of the typical Moroccan men out there, I just don't believe it's most of the population.

What about old and/or ugly and/or not-so-pious Moroccan women? Are they SOL?

[Jenn! 918]

I think there is way too much generalizing about Moroccan men though. That would be like saying American men look for x,y, and z, "only" If they're not looking for that, they're not real. Moroccan men are individuals, just like everywhere else in the world, and I don't believe they fit into a mold. I feel like my husband and his family are the completely "untypical" Moroccan family, going by what you ladies are listing as the typical or normal Moroccan family. Out of all of his brothers and sisters, only two are married, one on his second marriage with kids from a previous marriage. The other that is married has no children. Two sisters living at home, one divorced with young children, one divorced with an adult child, and one (40 and very pretty) never married....three older brothers never married. We didn't meet on a dating site, we met on a social site, and I approached him and gave him a friend request.

I do believe that there are many of the typical Moroccan men out there, I just don't believe it's most of the population.

What I was getting at is that even beyond unique personal preferences, which I do agree come into play at times, not everyone is able to land a "10". The same goes everywhere in the world...I mean, even if every guy did want the best looking, most virginal, and most pious woman around, that doesn't mean he has what it takes to get her. People end up settling for what they can get based on what they themselves bring to the table.

This is why many people end up "looking" for mates outside of their own country, because their own qualities carry more leverage. Just browse the RUB forum and you'll see what I mean. The same goes for Moroccan men - an American woman might tend to overlook certain shortcomings that disqualify them from getting a "quality" spouse at home.

Edited February 28, 2011 by Jenn!

[Lisamarie 79]

That could be true. What is RUB?

I do think my husband has what it takes to get a young, attractive, pious Moroccan woman, though. He has a good job, is extremely personable, is nice looking, has so many good qualities. He could've easily been in the "typical" Moroccan marriage by now. But he wanted someone he could be compatible with. He is intellectual and likes having deep conversations about different topics. He has always said he doesn't want to be married to a "picture", but married to someone that he has common interests with, that he can talk to, and someone with a good heart (although he always tells me I'm beautiful and have a beautiful heart, but I'm just the Average Joe). I don't think he would be able to be married to someone that couldn't hold a conversation like that, he would be bored and frustrated very quickly.

I'm sure there are many like you ladies are describing, I just don't think mine falls into that category, which shows that not all Moroccans are alike. We probably hear about the scamming ones, because the guys that aren't out scamming are not known about, and I'm sure there are many of them also.

What I was getting at is that even beyond unique personal preferences, which I do agree come into play at times, not everyone is able to land a "10". The same goes everywhere in the world...I mean, even if every guy did want the best looking, most virginal, and most pious woman around, that doesn't mean he has what it takes to get her. People end up settling for what they can get based on what they themselves bring to the table.

This is why many people end up "looking" for mates outside of their own country, because their own qualities carry more leverage. Just browse the RUB forum and you'll see what I mean. The same goes for Moroccan men - an American woman might tend to overlook certain shortcomings that disqualify them from getting a "quality" spouse at home.

[FormerlyKnownAs 17]

Not to give the impression that I live in the Land of Oz, because I certainly am aware of the scamming men from both Morocco and Egypt (where my fiance is from), but I wanted to add that Lisamarie brings up a very valid point. I'll explain...

Several years ago I had a somewhat controversial surgery to correct a problem that was keeping me from being able to walk without experiencing extreme pain. When my doctor suggested the surgery, I went to the internet to investigate other people's experiences with the surgery. I was interested in recovery times, etc. What I found was enough to make me have 2nd and 3rd thoughts about going through with the surgery, even though the surgeon was a close friend of my family. So many horror stories of people who never walked again! I mean hundreds of them. And not a single positive one! I did end up going through with it and a year later I was better than new.

Point being... How many people go out to the internet to share their *positive* experiences? I can tell you in the case of this surgery... Not very many! They're all too busy being happy and living their lives happily. There's really no reason for them to post their good stories. So it makes me wonder sometimes how skewed the viewpoint shared across the internet is. Hope that makes sense. Just food for thought!

[Jenn! 918]

That could be true. What is RUB?

I do think my husband has what it takes to get a young, attractive, pious Moroccan woman, though. He has a good job, is extremely personable, is nice looking, has so many good qualities. He could've easily been in the "typical" Moroccan marriage by now. But he wanted someone he could be compatible with. He is intellectual and likes having deep conversations about different topics. He has always said he doesn't want to be married to a "picture", but married to someone that he has common interests with, that he can talk to, and someone with a good heart (although he always tells me I'm beautiful and have a beautiful heart, but I'm just the Average Joe). I don't think he would be able to be married to someone that couldn't hold a conversation like that, he would be bored and frustrated very quickly.

I'm sure there are many like you ladies are describing, I just don't think mine falls into that category, which shows that not all Moroccans are alike. We probably hear about the scamming ones, because the guys that aren't out scamming are not known about, and I'm sure there are many of them also.

RUB = Russia, Ukraine, Belarus

I'm not sure what you mean about the kind of Moroccans I am describing. I wasn't trying to say that anyone looking for a spouse outside of the country is necessarily a scammer. Mine was a general statement that I think is applicable to people of any country, pointing out that sometimes people, for myriad reasons, prefer to look outside of their own country.

As for your husband, I think it's crucial in the interview that he is able to articulate exactly what it is about you that makes you preferable to the choices that he had in Morocco. Also, I wasn't trying to imply that your husband is just "settling" for you. I'm not a pious Muslim woman. I'm pretty sure that's not what my husband was looking for anyway, but who knows, maybe he was settling in a way. Regardless, what is important is that it was clear to the consulate that being with a non-pious, non-Muslim woman was not something he was just willing to tolerate temporarily on a greencard quest. If youre going against cultural norms, there should be an explanation for it.

[Lisamarie 79]

I agree. I will make sure my husband knows to clearly get that message across in the interview.

I wasn't talking about the Moroccans you are describing (even if it looked like I was only replying to you), I was talking about the Moroccans described in this whole thread.

RUB = Russia, Ukraine, Belarus

I'm not sure what you mean about the kind of Moroccans I am describing. I wasn't trying to say that anyone looking for a spouse outside of the country is necessarily a scammer. Mine was a general statement that I think is applicable to people of any country, pointing out that sometimes people, for myriad reasons, prefer to look outside of their own country.

As for your husband, I think it's crucial in the interview that he is able to articulate exactly what it is about you that makes you preferable to the choices that he had in Morocco. Also, I wasn't trying to imply that your husband is just "settling" for you. I'm not a pious Muslim woman. I'm pretty sure that's not what my husband was looking for anyway, but who knows, maybe he was settling in a way. Regardless, what is important is that it was clear to the consulate that being with a non-pious, non-Muslim woman was not something he was just willing to tolerate temporarily on a greencard quest. If youre going against cultural norms, there should be an explanation for it.