LOL These are good

[Cdnwmn 0]

Now that Vancouver has won the chance to host the 2010 Winter Olympics these are some questions people the world over are asking!!!! Believe it or not these questions about Canada were posted on an International Tourism Website (frightening, isn't it!). Obviously the answers are a joke; but the questions were really asked!!!!!.

Q: I have never seen it warm on Canadian TV, so how do the plants grow?(UK)

A. We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around and watch them die.

Q: Will I be able to see Polar Bears in the street? (USA)

A: Depends on how much you've been drinking.

Q: I want to walk from Vancouver to Toronto-can I follow the Railroad tracks? (Sweden)

A: Sure, it's only Four thousand miles, take lots of water.

Q: Is it safe to run around in the bushes in Canada? (Sweden)

A: So it's true what they say about Swedes.

Q: It is imperative that I find the names and addresses of places to contact for a stuffed Beaver. (Italy)

A: Let's not touch this one.

Q: Are there any ATM's (cash machines) in Canada? Can you send me a list of them in Toronto, Vancouver, Edmonton and Halifax? (UK)

A: What did your last slave die of?

Q: Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Canada? (USA )

A: A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe. Ca-na-da is that big country to your North...oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Calgary. Come naked.

Q: Which direction is North in Canada? (USA)

A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions.

Q: Can I bring cutlery into Canada? (UK)

A: Why? Just use your fingers like we do.

Q: Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? (USA)

A: Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is...oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in Vancouver and in Calgary, straight after the hippo races. Come naked.

Q: Do you have perfume in Canada? (Germany)

A: No, WE don't stink.

Q: I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Can you sell it in Canada? (USA)

A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather.

Q: Can you tell me the regions in British Columbia where the female population is smaller than the male population? (Italy)

A: Yes, gay nightclubs.

Q: Do you celebrate Thanksgiving in Canada? (USA)

A: Only at Thanksgiving.

Q: Are there supermarkets in Toronto and is milk available all year round?(Germany)

A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of Vegan hunter/gathers. Milk is illegal.

Q: I have a question about a famous animal in Canada, but I forget its name. It's a kind of big horse with horns. (USA)

A: It's called a Moose. They are tall and very violent, eating the brains of anyone walking close to them. You can scare them off by spraying yourself with human urine before you go out walking.

Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I go? (USA)

A: Yes, but you will have to learn it first.

[ceriserose 1]

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Thanks! Those were good!

I love the wanting a list of ATMs in the major cities. Oy vey!

[Fandango 1,439]

Now that Vancouver has won the chance to host the 2010 Winter Olympics these are some questions people the world over are asking!!!! Believe it or not these questions about Canada were posted on an International Tourism Website (frightening, isn't it!). Obviously the answers are a joke; but the questions were really asked!!!!!.

Q: I have never seen it warm on Canadian TV, so how do the plants grow?(UK)

A. We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around and watch them die.

Q: Will I be able to see Polar Bears in the street? (USA)

A: Depends on how much you've been drinking.

Q: I want to walk from Vancouver to Toronto-can I follow the Railroad tracks? (Sweden)

A: Sure, it's only Four thousand miles, take lots of water.

Q: Is it safe to run around in the bushes in Canada? (Sweden)

A: So it's true what they say about Swedes.

Q: It is imperative that I find the names and addresses of places to contact for a stuffed Beaver. (Italy)

A: Let's not touch this one.

Q: Are there any ATM's (cash machines) in Canada? Can you send me a list of them in Toronto, Vancouver, Edmonton and Halifax? (UK)

A: What did your last slave die of?

Q: Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Canada? (USA )

A: A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe. Ca-na-da is that big country to your North...oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Calgary. Come naked.

Q: Which direction is North in Canada? (USA)

A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions.

Q: Can I bring cutlery into Canada? (UK)

A: Why? Just use your fingers like we do.

Q: Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? (USA)

A: Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is...oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in Vancouver and in Calgary, straight after the hippo races. Come naked.

Q: Do you have perfume in Canada? (Germany)

A: No, WE don't stink.

Q: I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Can you sell it in Canada? (USA)

A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather.

Q: Can you tell me the regions in British Columbia where the female population is smaller than the male population? (Italy)

A: Yes, gay nightclubs.

Q: Do you celebrate Thanksgiving in Canada? (USA)

A: Only at Thanksgiving.

Q: Are there supermarkets in Toronto and is milk available all year round?(Germany)

A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of Vegan hunter/gathers. Milk is illegal.

Q: I have a question about a famous animal in Canada, but I forget its name. It's a kind of big horse with horns. (USA)

A: It's called a Moose. They are tall and very violent, eating the brains of anyone walking close to them. You can scare them off by spraying yourself with human urine before you go out walking.

Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I go? (USA)

A: Yes, but you will have to learn it first.

Hilarious! I laughed so hard I think a little pee came out

[Jasman0717 9]

Hey, I thought I saw a polar bear

[Bootylicious!! 2]

[almaty 19]

i feel sorry for all the canadians..having to not only put up with their own chopf##ks but soon the woeld's

[Sister Fracas 5]

Hilarious! I laughed so hard I think a little pee came out

Where is Marilyn handing out the adult nappies when you need her?

[Marilyn. 340]

[w¡n9Nµ7 §£@¥€r 123]

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Thanks! Those were good!

I love the wanting a list of ATMs in the major cities. Oy vey!

Confession: When I first drove to Canada to meet my wife, I took a lot of cash with me because I wasn't sure if I would be able to find an ATM machine in Canada

[ceriserose 1]

i feel sorry for all the canadians..having to not only put up with their own chopf##ks but soon the woeld's

I was violently against having the Olympics in my hometown, and am heartily glad I'm out of there long before. The construction pain in the a$$ in just the last year alone was enough to drive me crazy (albeit, not a long drive...).

[Melo 1]

[Marilyn. 340]

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Thanks! Those were good!

I love the wanting a list of ATMs in the major cities. Oy vey!

Confession: When I first drove to Canada to meet my wife, I took a lot of cash with me because I wasn't sure if I would be able to find an ATM machine in Canada

you know what I find strange about living here in Los Angeles,is that, yes, there is a lot of ATM machines but hardly any stores accept your ATM card , where as in Canada, at least where i am from, almost every store, big or small accepts your ATM card

Edited February 20, 2006 by MarilynP

[w¡n9Nµ7 §£@¥€r 123]

you know what I find strange about living here in Los Angeles,is that, yes, there is a lot of ATM machines but hardly any stores accept your ATM card , where as in Canada, at least where i am from, almost every store, big or small accepts your ATM card

I have noticed that trend here (in NJ) too. When I was in college, I used my ATM card almost everywhere. Recently, I have noticed that many stores have signs up that say they don't accept debit cards. I wonder why.

[ceriserose 1]

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Thanks! Those were good!

I love the wanting a list of ATMs in the major cities. Oy vey!

Confession: When I first drove to Canada to meet my wife, I took a lot of cash with me because I wasn't sure if I would be able to find an ATM machine in Canada

ROFL Oh, Agent Smith. *hangs head in sorrow*

Okay, I can kind of understand not knowing (I've had my share of "Oh really, you don't take this even though it's the same company?" moments between Canada and the US), so that's okay. Askng if there are compatible ATMs would be one thing. But to ask for a LIST of ATMs?

I mean, in Vancouver alone there have to be 1000's. Do banks even list their ATM locations anymore?

I did like the response about the slave though.

[w¡n9Nµ7 §£@¥€r 123]

Do banks even list their ATM locations anymore?

Bank of America does, on their website. I know this because my wife asked me to look up ATM locations between where I work and where she works and I was just looking that up!