Morals; when to "help" or not

[Rebecca Jo 1,962]

Rightly said, but would it not be a moral fault on us when we give them a way out from what they knowingly brought upon themselves? Somebody wants to know what to do to remain in the country just a couple of days after entering the country on a k-1 visa, deciding immediately they do not want to marry the petitioner anymore ...on the simple claim of having "cold feet!" At that point the only moral advise I can give will be that the OP return to their country if they do not want to be married.

The responsibility to give us a fair and clear story to see their "helplessness" is on them.

I think I know the thread you are talking about. If so, it was the petitioner that got "cold feet", not the visa beneficiary. If we are talking about the same thread, it was an odd discourse for Vj because these things usually get quite vitriolic. It stayed civil with the alien being reminded they could not stay in the US and adjust status based on the K1 entry with no marriage to the petitioner. She asked about how to stay if she was sponsored for work or school. It was explained how difficult/unlikely/possible etc. it would be to achieve this.

I've been reading this board over six years. As easy as one would think it is to spot fraud, there are other cases where it's not so easy. Even some of the successful marriages aren't what some would categorize as romantically ideal. In this community you can clearly see cases of couples for whom the marriage offers mutual benefits outside of romance. They are happy with those situations and they stay married. Is that immoral?

I've seen a rash of posts on this board lately of people multi-posting that they can't get a sponsor and asking for "ideas". What do you think those posters are really looking for? Would you say there is something possibly "immoral" going on in those cases? Something that violates the TOS?

Here's what I think you should do. And everybody else who runs across something that smells fishy. Report it. Let the Mods deal with it. I would hope by doing so, the appropriate actions will be taken.

I have done that on occasion but the mods have always deleted those contributions Apparently, illegal is bad.

I see what the OP is saying. He's weirding me out though by using the word "immoral". There's stuff in immigration that is immoral, and then there's stuff that's illegal. Just like anything else in the law.

Edited January 13, 2011 by Rebecca Jo

[Tero 105]

I think I know the thread you are talking about. If so, it was the petitioner that got "cold feet", not the visa beneficiary. If we are talking about the same thread, it was an odd discourse for Vj because these things usually get quite vitriolic. It stayed civil with the alien being reminded they could not stay in the US and adjust status based on the K1 entry with no marriage to the petitioner. She asked about how to stay if she was sponsored for work or school. It was explained how difficult/unlikely/possible etc. it would be to achieve this.

I've been reading this board over six years. As easy as one would think it is to spot fraud, there are other cases where it's not so easy. Even some of the successful marriages aren't what some would categorize as romantically ideal. In this community you can clearly see cases of couples for whom the marriage offers mutual benefits outside of romance. They are happy with those situations and they stay married. Is that immoral?

I've seen a rash of posts on this board lately of people multi-posting that they can't get a sponsor and asking for "ideas". What do you think those posters are really looking for? Would you say there is something possibly "immoral" going on in those cases? Something that violates the TOS?

Here's what I think you should do. And everybody else who runs across something that smells fishy. Report it. Let the Mods deal with it. I would hope by doing so, the appropriate actions will be taken.

I see what the OP is saying. He's weirding me out though by using the word "immoral". There's stuff in immigration that is immoral, and then there's stuff that's illegal. Just like anything else in the law.

Haha! I was not referring to that particular "cold feet" case as that fault came from the petitioner. However, wierding you out sounds funny. I'm happy somebody else just confirmed one of my points. The morals I'm trying to stress is with respect to those of us who, with good intentions, while aware of the obvious fraud, give "a way out" or useful info to the op(beneficiary) to either escape the wrath of the wronged petitioner or simply tell them what the petitioner can or cannot do to them. And, come on, we are matured enough to know what is within moral bounds and what is not. All I'm saying is that, when an op obviously used the petitioner to get a visa, and the op cannot convince us otherwise, then going further to give them any useful info makes us perpetuate their fraud. That's all I'm saying.

Ultimately, I think you have given a solution. If anyone sees something obviously rediculous, report it and leave it in the hands of the mods.