Is it wise to teach a 41 year old Filipina to drive?

[Dan and Judy 614]

wow Dan...that was a real doozy you had there wasn't it? im not trying to be mean but while i was reading your story...i was just smiling to myself because of the way you told the story, i can just picture what she was doing in my head. let me guess, you ended up paying for the private investigator? that's almost like you getting yourself investigated. but at least you got out of it. yeah the type of relationship that starts with a very big lie and ends in you looking a a flying rice cooker is never good for anyone, period. true everyone tells white lies to impress the other person...but nothing like what she told you though.

but congratulations on finding a new love though!

You guessed it. I got to pay for the investigation. It's really my own fault though. If we hadn't banned her from coming into the hospital where I work. She wouldnt have to hire a detective agency to do her spying for her. This was about

the time she was opening her hair salon with "our" credit cards. Some how they screwed up and delivered the spy report to our house instead of her salon. So I got to read the report before she did. After feeling pissed and violated, I got

a little mischievious and started writing my own report with things like "he helped a little old lady across the street" (actually to her that would be incriminating). but eventualy decided to let her have the original report. since there was

nothing in it against me. But those jerks do feed the paranoia, If I pulled into a parking space head first that was normal behavior. If you back in, they suggest that it could be for keeping a look out. We had so many confrontations

that this one dosn't stick out in my mind at all. But then it turns out they were doing more investigating than she thought she had authorized, so the bill was going up, Kind of like those magazine subscriptions that you cant cancel,

they just keep sending them and hope you're dumb enough to pay, regardless of the fact that you canceled. So I not only got the privilage of paying for it. I had to team up with her to fight the bill!!!!!!!!!!!!!! "We" disputed the claim and only got charged for what she originaly requested. I was hoping she was going to have a successful business, which would be beneficial to me at divorce time. :bonk: she was busy charging all expenses on credit cards and pocketing all income. I think technically she was blowing it on bingo at this time. I had no idea how much she was charging.

But hey this thread is about driving so here is a driving story:

She got a flat tire on the freeway so she pulled over and started trying to change the tire. A cop pulls up and tells her she cant change a tire there. She argues but he insists she cant change the tire there. She says she dosnt know where a station is to change the tire. He says he'll give her directions over his bull horn and follow behind her with his lights on. So they make it off the freeway ok, and he's giving directions over the bullhorn. She didnt understand what he said so she slams on the brakes. :rofl: booom the city got to pay for that one.

[rheanick 42]

Your previous marriage may be crazy but your car story made me laugh tonight.

BTW, you could teach your next wife how to drive. My hubby's ex-fiancee was really bad with driving. So he was quite worried about me. It took me several months to prove to him that i'm a good driver. Now, he does not get worried if i do long drive on my own.

[rlogan 2,036]

When people that old say they lie and steal because they are poor, the appropriate response is that they have it backwards: they are poor because they lie and steal.

With the driving, it is an individual thing. But with the Filipinas it isn't just that they lack driving. Many of them have never ridden a bicycle, done bumper-cars, or even ridden in many private cars for that matter. There's many more things besides driving that help with the driving experience.

In my state we could drive the farm equipment and trucks I think at any age, or at least we did anyways and who is going to stop you on a county road with a tractor...

So it may take longer.

[Kevin- 13]

I have to say her personality is likely very related to her driving problems. It seems there's some deep, deep insecurity in her heart. Were you ever able to find out why?

It's not that a certain age person from a certain place shouldn't learn to drive, it's that people who are mentally unstable shouldn't learn to drive at any age no matter where they're from.

[VanessaTony 3,567]

Your previous marriage may be crazy but your car story made me laugh tonight.

BTW, you could teach your next wife how to drive. My hubby's ex-fiancee was really bad with driving. So he was quite worried about me. It took me several months to prove to him that i'm a good driver. Now, he does not get worried if i do long drive on my own.

Random 'cause I'm not from PI but my husband makes me drive WORSE when he's in the car. I can feel him judging me. I've been driving since I was 16 so 11 years with no issues that were my fault (a few rear-enders here and there).

I don't know what it is. one of my other immigrant friends agreed that he drives worse when his wife is in the car. My hubby is good with cars. The smallest thing he freaks out. Like the truck he got for me from his dad, the steering wheel doesn't adjust higher or lower and I think it sits too low because I knock it with my right leg as I get out, enough to lock the wheel so when you try and start the car you need to shake the wheel to get the key to turn (its not the end of the world, happens sometimes in other cars). Somehow this is "my fault". The check engine light came on today while I was driving (apparently not while he was), this is also my fault.. never mind the trucks done over 200K miles.

I had a friend visit back in June or something and I drove her around in his Camaro (aussie licence was still valid) and I never felt self-conscious. Felt completely normal. I think I should wear my BP monitor when i drive to see whether it's worse when I'm with him as opposed to alone.

Ugh. I'm currently on a learners permit while I practice in the snow before my test (doesn't know in Aus where I live). i can't wait till i pass then I will NEVER drive with Tony in the car. He can drive us around (unless he's unconscious and I'm taking him to hospital).

[Dan and Judy 614]

Random 'cause I'm not from PI but my husband makes me drive WORSE when he's in the car. I can feel him judging me. I've been driving since I was 16 so 11 years with no issues that were my fault (a few rear-enders here and there).

Well one thing you've got in common with my ex is, none of the accidents were her fault. Even when she ran into the building, she told the cop that the curb stop wasnt high enough. she realy said that

I don't know what it is. one of my other immigrant friends agreed that he drives worse when his wife is in the car. My hubby is good with cars. The smallest thing he freaks out. Like the truck he got for me from his dad, the steering wheel doesn't adjust higher or lower and I think it sits too low because I knock it with my right leg as I get out, enough to lock the wheel so when you try and start the car you need to shake the wheel to get the key to turn (its not the end of the world, happens sometimes in other cars).

He didn't just take out a substantial life insurance policy on you , did he????

Somehow this is "my fault". The check engine light came on today while I was driving (apparently not while he was), this is also my fault.. never mind the trucks done over 200K miles.

Ugh. I'm currently on a learners permit while I practice in the snow before my test (doesn't know in Aus where I live). i can't wait till i pass then I will NEVER drive with Tony in the car. He can drive us around (unless he's unconscious and I'm taking him to hospital).

Next time it snows, hide a camcorder in the truck , get your husband to go out with you driving early in the morning, casually pull into a big empty parking lot (one without a bunch of curb stops in it)

once you are in the middle of the parking lot, turn the steering wheel all the way to the left or all the way to the right. Step on the gas pedal hard and keep yelling YEEE Haaw YEEEE Haaw.

(the accent is on the YEEEE). Put that on Youtube ( First Make sure there are not any cops sitting in the doughnut shop next door)

[Dan and Judy 614]

I have to say her personality is likely very related to her driving problems. It seems there's some deep, deep insecurity in her heart. Were you ever able to find out why?

According to her, she's been abused by men since she was about 13. That's possible, but she will be happy to tell you that I have abused her and cheated on her almost

every day. If anything I have been idiotically tolerant and understanding.

So was she abused and that caused her to be wacko or has she been imagining all of it? Probably a combination.

[rheanick 42]

Random 'cause I'm not from PI but my husband makes me drive WORSE when he's in the car. I can feel him judging me. I've been driving since I was 16 so 11 years with no issues that were my fault (a few rear-enders here and there).

I don't know what it is. one of my other immigrant friends agreed that he drives worse when his wife is in the car. My hubby is good with cars. The smallest thing he freaks out. Like the truck he got for me from his dad, the steering wheel doesn't adjust higher or lower and I think it sits too low because I knock it with my right leg as I get out, enough to lock the wheel so when you try and start the car you need to shake the wheel to get the key to turn (its not the end of the world, happens sometimes in other cars). Somehow this is "my fault". The check engine light came on today while I was driving (apparently not while he was), this is also my fault.. never mind the trucks done over 200K miles.

I had a friend visit back in June or something and I drove her around in his Camaro (aussie licence was still valid) and I never felt self-conscious. Felt completely normal. I think I should wear my BP monitor when i drive to see whether it's worse when I'm with him as opposed to alone.

Ugh. I'm currently on a learners permit while I practice in the snow before my test (doesn't know in Aus where I live). i can't wait till i pass then I will NEVER drive with Tony in the car. He can drive us around (unless he's unconscious and I'm taking him to hospital).

To Vanessa:

Regarding NOT driving your husband when he is sane and sober, you are not alone in that department. I also told my hubby that i will never drive him around unless he is drunk or uncouncious. And if he would insist on me driving, he has to prepare the divorce paper and i would sign it after our ride.

And on the wheels getting stuck. It happened to me several times. It is definitely not your fault. It kind of scary especially if it happened at night and there are only few cars left in the parking lot. I got feed up with it that i told my hubby that i want a new car.

On learning how to drive, just get a friend to teach you around. And watch out for those ambulance and fire trucks. You need to know how to response to them. One time, i just have to stop in the middle of the intersection to let them pass.

To OP,

Pardon for hijacking your thread. Do you have other stories about driving, yours are really funny.

[TripleG 3]

I know I will get slammed big time for my response but, the poster did ask. Well my 2 cents is if its not absolutely necessary I wouln't teach her to drive. Its not only because of her age but because of her gender that she is at a disadvantage. My wife is 24 and can barely drive an automatic in the U.S.A. and I feel its too dangerous for her so she doesn't. I have tried to teach her to drive a manual in the RP and even with the slower speeds and less traffic in the province, after several attempts my heart couldn't take anymore. She just doesn't have the decision making skills to drive safely. I taught both her father and her uncle who are both 55+ how to drive in a manual transmission car and they grasped the concept pretty good after the first lesson, and after limitted practice I felt safe riding with them. My wife scares the ####### out of me after several more lessons than her older male relatives ever got. Anyways most men who post on here can probablly comment on how women drive and I am not being a chauvenist in my post, I am just stating an observation.

In my wifes defense, she says I am a terrible teacher, and she is probablly right about that. Once I get scared or nervous I do revert to yelling instructions. Maybe her older male relatives handle those circumstances of my teaching better? I don't know?

Wyatt.

[Dan and Judy 614]

Thanks to everyone for their sage advice. I've been taking it all in and ruminating on it. Good points made in favor of and against.

The best reason for teaching her to drive; Is it makes her more independent, gives her the ability to get a job and go to school, in the states it really is

a handicap, not being able to drive. If I would have a stroke or become disabled it would obviously be

an advantage if she could drive. Also I'm 10 years older so just by statistics I'll probably die 20 years

before she does.

the problems are; increased insurance rates, posible death and destruction,

BTW I did try to teach my ex how to ride a bike. I got her training wheels and she bent them, I got stronger training wheels and she bent them, I got super heavy duty training wheels and she bent them. I ran along side her holding the bike up. She never did get the hang of it. Meanwhile the son that was 7 when he got here learned with no real problem.

Perhaps riding a bike could be a predicter of driving performance? Her daughters who were teenagers when they got here are not terrible drivers.

I think it is best to try and teach her, and play it by ear. If she learns just well enough to pass the test, then she can at least drive in emergencys.

I have to run to work now

this youtube is hilarious