Jump to content
Amby

The 5 Stupidest Questions People Ask The Butterball Turkey Hotline

By Amby in Off Topic

 Share

22 posts in this topic

Recommended Posts

IR5FORMUMSIE Grand Master

IR5FORMUMSIE   850

Posted
Filed: Other Country: Canada
 Timeline
Posted

Ladies don't tell people where to insert things. Therefore.... BOING!

763px-Crossroads_baker_explosion.jpg

She was talking about suppositories, silly, what did you think she meant?

IR5

2007-07-27 – Case complete at NVC waiting on the world or at least MTL.

2007-12-19 - INTERVIEW AT MTL, SPLIT DECISION.

2007-12-24-Mom's I-551 arrives, Pop's still in purgatory (AP)

2008-03-11-AP all done, Pop is approved!!!!

tumblr_lme0c1CoS21qe0eclo1_r6_500.gif

Link to comment
Share on other sites
Nagishkaw Grand Master

Nagishkaw   510

Posted
Filed: Lift. Cond. (apr) Country: Egypt
 Timeline
Posted

REAL Ladies don't tell people where to insert things. Therefore.... BOING!

763px-Crossroads_baker_explosion.jpg

Awww, that is so sweet calling me The Bomb. I'm so flattered you consider me attractive. You really know how to treat a lady.

Don't just open your mouth and prove yourself a fool....put it in writing.

It gets harder the more you know. Because the more you find out, the uglier everything seems.

kodasmall3.jpg

Link to comment
Share on other sites
TBoneTX Grand Master

TBoneTX   45,267

Posted
Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Ecuador
 Timeline
Posted

My best hyskool buddy routinely spent every Thanksgiving cowering under the furniture in abject fear for his life, si man.

06-04-2007 = TSC stamps postal return-receipt for I-129f.

06-11-2007 = NOA1 date (unknown to me).

07-20-2007 = Phoned Immigration Officer; got WAC#; where's NOA1?

09-25-2007 = Touch (first-ever).

09-28-2007 = NOA1, 23 days after their 45-day promise to send it (grrrr).

10-20 & 11-14-2007 = Phoned ImmOffs; "still pending."

12-11-2007 = 180 days; file is "between workstations, may be early Jan."; touches 12/11 & 12/12.

12-18-2007 = Call; file is with Division 9 ofcr. (bckgrnd check); e-prompt to shake it; touch.

12-19-2007 = NOA2 by e-mail & web, dated 12-18-07 (187 days; 201 per VJ); in mail 12/24/07.

01-09-2008 = File from USCIS to NVC, 1-4-08; NVC creates file, 1/15/08; to consulate 1/16/08.

01-23-2008 = Consulate gets file; outdated Packet 4 mailed to fiancee 1/27/08; rec'd 3/3/08.

04-29-2008 = Fiancee's 4-min. consular interview, 8:30 a.m.; much evidence brought but not allowed to be presented (consul: "More proof! Second interview! Bring your fiance!").

05-05-2008 = Infuriating $12 call to non-English-speaking consulate appointment-setter.

05-06-2008 = Better $12 call to English-speaker; "joint" interview date 6/30/08 (my selection).

06-30-2008 = Stokes Interrogations w/Ecuadorian (not USC); "wait 2 weeks; we'll mail her."

07-2008 = Daily calls to DOS: "currently processing"; 8/05 = Phoned consulate, got Section Chief; wrote him.

08-07-08 = E-mail from consulate, promising to issue visa "as soon as we get her passport" (on 8/12, per DHL).

08-27-08 = Phoned consulate (they "couldn't find" our file); visa DHL'd 8/28; in hand 9/1; through POE on 10/9 with NO hassles(!).

Link to comment
Share on other sites
thongd4me Experienced

thongd4me   69

Posted
Filed: Lift. Cond. (apr) Country: Thailand
 Timeline
Posted

How about "Can the butter ball be used for shooting hoops after Thanksgiving is over?"

02/2003 - Met

08/24/09 I-129F; 09/02 NOA1; 10/14 NOA2; 11/24 interview; 11/30 K-1 VISA (92 d); 12/29 POE 12/31/09 Marriage

03/29/-04/06/10 - AOS sent/rcd; 04/13 NOA1; AOS 2 NBC

04/14 $1010 cashed; 04/19 NOA1

04/28 Biom.

06/16 EAD/AP

06/24 Infops; AP mail

06/28 EAD mail; travel 2 BKK; return 07/17

07/20/10 interview, 4d. b4 I-129F anniv. APPROVAL!*

08/02/10 GC

08/09/10 SSN

2012-05-16 Lifting Cond. - I-751 sent

2012-06-27 Biom,

2013-01-10 7 Mo, 2 Wks. & 5 days - 10 Yr. PR Card (no interview)

*2013-04-22 Apply for citizenship (if she desires at that time) 90 days prior to 3yr anniversary of P. Residence

Link to comment
Share on other sites
Ban Hammer Grand Master

Ban Hammer   13,333

Posted
Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Brazil
 Timeline
Posted

If you've ever wondered why companies like Butterball have a Turkey Talk-Line to help people cook a bird that, in theory, shouldn't require all that much effort, here are some examples why.

A Reuters editor talked to the call-fielders at Butterball and came back with these head-scratching gems:

*Is it okay to thaw my turkey in the bathtub while bathing my kids?

*Can I brine my turkey in the washing machine?

*Can I use my oven's self-cleaning cycle to speed up the cooking process?

*If I cut my turkey with a chainsaw will the oil affect the taste?

*Can I take my frozen turkey into my sauna to thaw it faster?

If you need to know the answers to any of these, then you should probably call the Butterball line... or order in for Thanksgiving.

http://consumerist.com/2010/11/the-5-stupidest-questions-people-ask-the-butterball-turkey-hotline.html

answers in order

- only if you like the taste of soap for your thanksgiving meal.

- no, not unless you want to buy a new washer soon.

- only if you want to start a fire

- yes

- no, there's enough turkeys in there already

* ~ * Charles * ~ *
 

I carry a gun because a cop is too heavy.

 

USE THE REPORT BUTTON INSTEAD OF MESSAGING A MODERATOR!

Link to comment
Share on other sites
thongd4me Experienced

thongd4me   69

Posted
Filed: Lift. Cond. (apr) Country: Thailand
 Timeline
Posted

answers in order

- only if you like the taste of soap for your thanksgiving meal.

- no, not unless you want to buy a new washer soon.

- only if you want to start a fire

- yes

- no, there's enough turkeys in there already

Fidel Castro's take on Thanksgiving:

"Give me a turkey sandwich with a live turkey!"

- was a reference to the quote "Give me a chicken sandwich with a live chicken."

Mostly the reaction was "what was this idiot trying to say?" but I think the

true interpretation was that on his first controversial visit to New York to

speak at the UN, Fidel was anxious that someone might try to poison him

and if his food could be prepared using a "live" chicken that he knew was

healthy and not killed by giving it poison, he would be able to rest more easily.

offtopic45vn.gif and now for judge "Chickenetti"

http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=cf3_1185784585

02/2003 - Met

08/24/09 I-129F; 09/02 NOA1; 10/14 NOA2; 11/24 interview; 11/30 K-1 VISA (92 d); 12/29 POE 12/31/09 Marriage

03/29/-04/06/10 - AOS sent/rcd; 04/13 NOA1; AOS 2 NBC

04/14 $1010 cashed; 04/19 NOA1

04/28 Biom.

06/16 EAD/AP

06/24 Infops; AP mail

06/28 EAD mail; travel 2 BKK; return 07/17

07/20/10 interview, 4d. b4 I-129F anniv. APPROVAL!*

08/02/10 GC

08/09/10 SSN

2012-05-16 Lifting Cond. - I-751 sent

2012-06-27 Biom,

2013-01-10 7 Mo, 2 Wks. & 5 days - 10 Yr. PR Card (no interview)

*2013-04-22 Apply for citizenship (if she desires at that time) 90 days prior to 3yr anniversary of P. Residence

Link to comment
Share on other sites
 

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
 Share
Go to topic listing
- Back to Top -

Important Disclaimer: Please read carefully the Visajourney.com Terms of Service. If you do not agree to the Terms of Service you should not access or view any page (including this page) on VisaJourney.com. Answers and comments provided on Visajourney.com Forums are general information, and are not intended to substitute for informed professional medical, psychiatric, psychological, tax, legal, investment, accounting, or other professional advice. Visajourney.com does not endorse, and expressly disclaims liability for any product, manufacturer, distributor, service or service provider mentioned or any opinion expressed in answers or comments. VisaJourney.com does not condone immigration fraud in any way, shape or manner. VisaJourney.com recommends that if any member or user knows directly of someone involved in fraudulent or illegal activity, that they report such activity directly to the Department of Homeland Security, Immigration and Customs Enforcement. You can contact ICE via email at Immigration.Reply@dhs.gov or you can telephone ICE at 1-866-347-2423. All reported threads/posts containing reference to immigration fraud or illegal activities will be removed from this board. If you feel that you have found inappropriate content, please let us know by contacting us here with a url link to that content. Thank you.
×
×
  • Create New...