mail order bride

[Fandango 1,439]

i agree and disagree. The reason for these "warnings" in your quoted text is because the poster was conscious of the scammer tying to claim VAWA. The scammer (in the quote) has already been cheating on her husband and it was proven she was professing her love to another the DAY after their wedding.

While I agree in a normal situation that treatment would be abhorrent, the poster you quoted was warning the OP about how to make sure the scammer didn't contact her family/friends in the Philippines to learn how to accuse her husband (the one she's cheating on) of abuse and thus claim VAWA. It wasn't about "control" it was about protecting the OP.

I disagree...if you read the actual post, and all of it that I edited out, it was clear the guy was suggesting this as means of giving his wife 'another chance' to regain trust, but since he couldn't be around her 24/7, it was his way to make sure she didn't contact the bf while he was presumably at work.

But let's say you're right for a second; protecting oneself from a VAWA claim doesn't mean essentially holding your spouse hostage, without money, without a way to contact home, in a foreign country where English is not the spouse's primary language. Let alone the fact that a situation like that would actually HELP a VAWA claim. A good way to going about avoiding a claim is to leave the home/make arrangements for the spouse to leave the home...basically just making sure that he isn't alone with his wife so that she could claim VAWA.

Finally, the wife wasn't claiming VAWA...there was VAWA talk in the thread, but it was all speculation. The spouse in question supposedly is going home, last I read.

Either way, that advice above uses a power imbalance and exploiting the foreign SO's dependence on the USC, as means of controlling the foreign SO and that's just wrong. iIt's also what this article was about. No matter what anyone does, they don't deserve to be treated like that.

Edited November 23, 2010 by Lisa C