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Missa

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Filed: AOS (apr) Country: Canada
Timeline

i was reading the canadian news on msn.ca and stumbled upon this story in the lifestyles section. i thought it would be nice to share.

i hope the link works

story of a ukrainian mail order bride

cheers :)

..The time line ..

04/04/2007 met in person

22/10 2008 engaged

29/03/2009 I-129F Sent

06/04/2009 money order cashed

13/04/2009 I-129F NOA1

20/07/2009 NOA2 petition approved

08/12/2009 Packet 3 Received

08/13/2009 Packet 3 Sent

09/14/2009 Medical Toronto

06/11/2009 interview PASSED!

15/11/2009 Visa Rcvd

14/02/2010 POE Sault Ste Marie ON

26/03/2010 Married

AOS

05/10/2010 mailed

05/17/2010 check cashed

05/21/2010 NOA1 rcvd

06/15/2010 Biometrics(Grand Rapids MI)

08/20/2010 interview (approved)

ROC

08/21/2012

10/13/2012 biometric

waiting

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so that's what they mean when they say they want 'old-fashioned' ;-) i always thought that meant like the '50s but this is like cave dwelling days... there might have even been a caveman or two who would've clubbed over a list like this

never leave the house

never possess money

obey all orders

cut contact with family

have sex on command

cook/clean in a specific way

if you gave your info (receipt #s, full name, etc) to anyone on VJ under the guise that they would "help" you through the immigration journey with his inside contacts (like his sister at USCIS) ... please contact OLUInquiries@dhs.gov, and go to http://www.whitehouse.gov/contact to report anything suspicious. Contact your congressman and senator's offices as well.

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Filed: K-1 Visa Country: Wales
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How did her Mother immigrate?

“If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles. If you know yourself but not the enemy, for every victory gained you will also suffer a defeat. If you know neither the enemy nor yourself, you will succumb in every battle.”

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It's really interesting that the tired old excuse of 'American women have no family values/etc' is so widely used. It's scary imo, because what many of these men want is an obvious imbalance of power and control. While as a member of VJ, it's not really polite to comment with more than a perfunctory 'yay for love, congrats, all the best to you both' when men echo the above sentiment, one has to wonder why in a sea of varied women - all walks of life - it's even logical to have the balls to say how American women aren't family conscious. To me, that's a HUGE red flag which tells me the man either needed the 'buying power' of a GC to 'sweeten the deal' as far as his overall attractiveness/marriageability, or is just some power hungry freak who needs to control his wife's every move.

Either way, for cases like this, I thank God for VAWA and IMBRA.

Lisa, have you met the most leering, drooling, obvious control freaks on the forums yet :whistle:

i think i have the mindset down now though....

i'd like a beautiful woman, so beautiful she could have stepped from a magazine (of course then this woman would have NO interest in me)

she must be from a country where she is so desperate to escape that i look good to her

she will do all i say, from cooking, cleaning, and sex on command

she needs to look her best at all times but if she begins knowing how lovely she looks, i will berate her into submission

and so on... if you've ever had to deal with abused women, you'll know the list

it's too bad they dont have the GC picked up at a local office in person by the immigrant and their rights explained to them. for me that would be worth it being a few extra days later (in person pickup rather than mailed) to know my husband knows what to do in this/that situation (not just a domestic situation but also with a police officer and so on). i have that info for him already even though we are not even at that stage.... i want him prepared and to know his rights and his responsibilities. problem is our govt is putting that responsibility on the petitioner who could be a freak and placing the beneficiary at a disadvantage.

if you gave your info (receipt #s, full name, etc) to anyone on VJ under the guise that they would "help" you through the immigration journey with his inside contacts (like his sister at USCIS) ... please contact OLUInquiries@dhs.gov, and go to http://www.whitehouse.gov/contact to report anything suspicious. Contact your congressman and senator's offices as well.

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Filed: K-1 Visa Country: Wales
Timeline

The story seemed pretty clear.

US Men in their 50's and 50's who wanted a younger/more attractive wife and who were not likely to get one in the US.

Same deal for women going to North Africa.

The lady who wrote the story is obviously not stupid and took the deal. She then found out when she got here she had other opportunities.

“If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles. If you know yourself but not the enemy, for every victory gained you will also suffer a defeat. If you know neither the enemy nor yourself, you will succumb in every battle.”

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The story seemed pretty clear.

US Men in their 50's and 50's who wanted a younger/more attractive wife and who were not likely to get one in the US.

Same deal for women going to North Africa.

The lady who wrote the story is obviously not stupid and took the deal. She then found out when she got here she had other opportunities.

Boiler nails it again!

+1 :thumbs:

Sign-on-a-church-af.jpgLogic-af.jpgwwiao.gif

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Filed: Timeline

The story seemed pretty clear.

US Men in their 50's and 50's who wanted a younger/more attractive wife and who were not likely to get one in the US.

Same deal for women going to North Africa.

The lady who wrote the story is obviously not stupid and took the deal. She then found out when she got here she had other opportunities.

One can only get a younger/hotter spouse with an equalizer....money, gc, etc. I truly truly believe that under normal circ, like usually attracts like. Which let's face it...the heavier, older men don't want heavier, older women. And vice versa. it sucks, but I believe it to be true.

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Filed: Timeline

Here's a fine example of misguided 'precaution' that sounds insane. I edited who said it not to be accused of starting a sh!t fling, but I think it's a perfect example of a power struggle gone wrong. Granted, there's infidelity at play in the below scenario,but no one deserves to be treated like this:

Since you are often at work, you won't have the ability to monitor her behavior. I'd say she could do without any contact with the Philippines for a good long time. Not as punishment, but as precaution. It could be hard to do that since you're not home though. You could make sure she doesn't have direct access to the money, and sever her ability to call and text overseas as well. Disable the computer when you're not home (BIOS password). Even with all that, you'll have to take quite a leap of faith in trusting her again.

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Filed: Country: Philippines
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One can only get a younger/hotter spouse with an equalizer....money, gc, etc. I truly truly believe that under normal circ, like usually attracts like. Which let's face it...the heavier, older men don't want heavier, older women. And vice versa. it sucks, but I believe it to be true.

Yep, although there are quite a few odd couples out there that are both USC and money, power or status didn't come into play.

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Yep, although there are quite a few odd couples out there that are both USC and money, power or status didn't come into play.

Yeah, and it's infrequent. It's just not all that infrequent when it comes to immigration.

Edited by LaL
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Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Australia
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Here's a fine example of misguided 'precaution' that sounds insane. I edited who said it not to be accused of starting a sh!t fling, but I think it's a perfect example of a power struggle gone wrong. Granted, there's infidelity at play in the below scenario,but no one deserves to be treated like this:

i agree and disagree. The reason for these "warnings" in your quoted text is because the poster was conscious of the scammer tying to claim VAWA. The scammer (in the quote) has already been cheating on her husband and it was proven she was professing her love to another the DAY after their wedding.

While I agree in a normal situation that treatment would be abhorrent, the poster you quoted was warning the OP about how to make sure the scammer didn't contact her family/friends in the Philippines to learn how to accuse her husband (the one she's cheating on) of abuse and thus claim VAWA. It wasn't about "control" it was about protecting the OP.

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