Raising Fil/Am Children

[one...two...tree 2,762]

For those who plan to have children or already have children....

1. How much of their Filipino culture do you hope they will inherit? Language, customs, beliefs, attitudes?

2. Do you speak to your child in your native tongue? (Bisaya, Tagalog, etc.). Does your American spouse support, encourage your child to learn it?

3. Have you or will you bring/send your child to the Philippines to stay for any extended period of time? Summertime for example?

* Also - if you (the American spouse), chose a Filipina spouse because of certain qualities you found were lacking here with most potential spouses here in America, how do you plan to keep your children from becoming "Americanized" in that way?

[adiiann 163]

For those who plan to have children or already have children....

1. How much of their Filipino culture do you hope they will inherit? Language, customs, beliefs, attitudes?

- I don't care to whom culture my kids will adapt as long as they will grow up with fear of God, with respect to all humankind and living things and with so much love and kindness in their heart.

2. Do you speak to your child in your native tongue? (Bisaya, Tagalog, etc.). Does your American spouse support, encourage your child to learn it?

- I will teach them to be bilingual.

3. Have you or will you bring/send your child to the Philippines to stay for any extended period of time? Summertime for example?

- I wouldn't mind my kids staying in the Philippines for any period of time as long as it is okay to do so.

* Also - if you (the American spouse), chose a Filipina spouse because of certain qualities you found were lacking here with most potential spouses here in America, how do you plan to keep your children from becoming "Americanized" in that way?

- As for my kids, choosing their spouse, I believe that when it is the right time for them to choose their spouse, they are old enough to know what they wanted and to know between wrong and right. Individual race doesn't matter to me, what important for me is that they are real person and they will love my kids if not more than I love them, at least almost equal.

[Markieboy 104]

For those who plan to have children or already have children....

1. How much of their Filipino culture do you hope they will inherit? Language, customs, beliefs, attitudes?

We hope they would inherit the best of both worlds. Languange, definitely the more, the merrier. My wife and I agreed that I should teach them proper English, and she would teach them proper Filipino, Ilokano, and alittle I'baloi. I say proper, meaning with the native accent and correct syntax/grammar. Customs and beliefs are a mixed subject really. There are some Filipino customs and beliefs that we both find ridiculous. On the same token, we both disagree with some American norms. We would only hope they inherit the Filipino attitude. Most children today have a care-free attitude and disregard many blessings that they have. I have noticed this in the American side of my family, as well as with other families. I suppose much of it has to do with upbringing, discipline and structure.

2. Do you speak to your child in your native tongue? (Bisaya, Tagalog, etc.). Does your American spouse support, encourage your child to learn it?

Absolutely. I will speak to my child in English and try my Filipino. My wife will take more control with speaking Filipino and Ilokano, as well as English. We definitely want our children to hear the language as early as birth. They will become accustomed to the unique sounds, and eventually, will become comfortable speaking and understanding it.

3. Have you or will you bring/send your child to the Philippines to stay for any extended period of time? Summertime for example?

Absolutely! When I was young, my family would spend many summers and Christmases in the Philippines. My father (Ilokano) stressed how important one's roots are. To actually visit the place your forefathers came from is such a humbling experience. We hope we can give the same experience to our children. It is wonderful to have all the luxuries in life, but it is also important to be grateful and humble for what we have. Visiting the Philippines really does this. I have also studied in the Philippines for part of my undergraduate, as well as my post-graduate. I had such a wonderful time during those years. And if my children shared the same interest to study there, we would not hesitate to send them.

* Also - if you (the American spouse), chose a Filipina spouse because of certain qualities you found were lacking here with most potential spouses here in America, how do you plan to keep your children from becoming "Americanized" in that way?

I chose my Filipina spouse because she is the most loving and loyal woman I have ever met. Generally, Filipinas are very loving and caring. My wife is extremely hard-working and innovative. These are traits that I have noticed more in Filipinas than I do in American women. Just my own observation. Parents are a child's first teachers. We should teach by example. My wife and I hope to teach our children to appreciate how lucky they are, to study hard because they are fortunate to go to school, and to become responsible, dependable and hard-working adults in the future. These are just some of the things we hope for our children.

[JoBri 548]

For those who plan to have children or already have children....

1. How much of their Filipino culture do you hope they will inherit? Language, customs, beliefs, attitudes?

#####I wish our son to learn EVERYTHING we can teach him of his Filipino, Dutch, Spanish, German, Chinese, French cultures... hehehe

2. Do you speak to your child in your native tongue? (Bisaya, Tagalog, etc.). Does your American spouse support, encourage your child to learn it?

#####I only know a few words of tagalog. My wife speaks almost exclusively in English to our son. I am afraid he will learn very little filipino. I would have no problem with him learning filipino though... Why would that be a problem? The more diversity a child has the better. Are there some who disapprove of that? I wouldnt know why a person would not want that.

3. Have you or will you bring/send your child to the Philippines to stay for any extended period of time? Summertime for example?

#####We would never want to be seperated from our child. Besides, there is no family or friends in the Philippines for him to stay with even if that were the case. No.... the Philippines for our child will be only perhaps one day as an exchange student...

* Also - if you (the American spouse), chose a Filipina spouse because of certain qualities you found were lacking here with most potential spouses here in America, how do you plan to keep your children from becoming "Americanized" in that way?

#####I did not choose my spouse. God chose my spouse. It was my rule to not even communicate with someone from the Philippines or Nigeria. It is only by a freak chance, God's will, that the door to us talking ever occurred. My wife was an unexpected gift of God to me, period. And I am extremely blessed. And no worries about our son becoming "Americanized". He will become "Christianized", God willing. We will pray for him to have a personal relationship with Jesus and to live his life to become Christ-like, irregardless of what country and culture he grows up in.

[Atencio 43]

I did not choose my spouse. God chose my spouse. It was my rule to not even communicate with someone from the Philippines or Nigeria. It is only by a freak chance, God's will, that the door to us talking ever occurred. My wife was an unexpected gift of God to me, period. And I am extremely blessed. And no worries about our son becoming "Americanized". He will become "Christianized", God willing. We will pray for him to have a personal relationship with Jesus and to live his life to become Christ-like, irregardless of what country and culture he grows up in.

Nice comment Brijo