Time flies!

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

Awsome news! (and a bit late from me..)

As for sleeping naked, on my side of the wold. I'm all about it, Anna not so much. Because, yes, dirt on the sheets! Cat's been in the bed! I didn't wash my damn feet! Again! It's all good, we're nekkid when it counts.

Ah yeah, the "other" FSU rules...

1. Bathe before bed, usually together, no problem here

2. 2 sheets under, one sheet over, duvette cover on the quilt.

3. No animals up the stairs where the bedrooms are. They get screamed at in Russian if they dare to come above the landing. She lets them as far as the landing on the steps because there is a window there they both like to look out of.

as for the other suggestion...

I did, some years ago see a "survey" that showed the success rate of American/Ukrainian marriages after 10 years was 81% (not divorced after 10 years) while the American/American rate was 52%. I do not know how scientific it was or accurate and I do not know how it would apply to other FSU countries. It did not include fiancees that never got married (this was before IMBRA) so it was not a rate of success of K-1 visas, per se.

I haven't seen anything else, haven't looked for anything else and really don't care, but it would be interesting if there were some listing of percentages of divorce rates among Americans and other foreign nationals. Just for curiosity.

[AKguy 1]

Gary, you mentioning the divorce rates made me try to investigate a little bit, and I came across this.

12 Reasons Why International Russian American Marriages Fail.

One of them, #9 I thought was a little funny because someone here came to mind.

9. Bride Fairytale Illusions. There are two frequent models of Russian wives’ behavior of “hanging on a man’s neck” without becoming a “full-fledged member of society”, which models turn unbearable to their husbands. (1) “Cinderella Forever”: “Why study language, as well as explore anything outside the house, and bother adapting to foreign life, – it seems so easy to serve the duty of cooking and cleaning, since everything around seems so stable at last.” – Normal reaction of a grown-up, “hunter-winner” man: “What a bore!” Pathological reaction: “Now it’s time to unwind into revenging for all the crimes of feminism!” (2) “Princess Born”: “I’m young and beautiful, I give you great sex, you are my debtor, why aren’t you a movie hero?” Not that I think anything will happen with Sim and his wife, I could just hear his way of typing her accent in there.

Anyway, some good insight in that link that I think might help people new to this scene.

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

Gary, you mentioning the divorce rates made me try to investigate a little bit, and I came across this.

12 Reasons Why International Russian American Marriages Fail.

One of them, #9 I thought was a little funny because someone here came to mind.

9. Bride Fairytale Illusions. There are two frequent models of Russian wives’ behavior of “hanging on a man’s neck” without becoming a “full-fledged member of society”, which models turn unbearable to their husbands. (1) “Cinderella Forever”: “Why study language, as well as explore anything outside the house, and bother adapting to foreign life, – it seems so easy to serve the duty of cooking and cleaning, since everything around seems so stable at last.” – Normal reaction of a grown-up, “hunter-winner” man: “What a bore!” Pathological reaction: “Now it’s time to unwind into revenging for all the crimes of feminism!” (2) “Princess Born”: “I’m young and beautiful, I give you great sex, you are my debtor, why aren’t you a movie hero?” Not that I think anything will happen with Sim and his wife, I could just hear his way of typing her accent in there.

Anyway, some good insight in that link that I think might help people new to this scene.

Interesting but I am not so concerned with divorce rates among Ukrainians or Russians, per se. I know their divorce rates are high and I know a lot of it is because the men are super-horn dogs and there is lots of available "P" everywhere. Not to mention drunk and abusive, which may or may not be as big a factor as it is made out to be.

The USCIS stats seem incorrect, I mean to the point they just seem that it can't be. 17% of fiancees remain past one year!!!???? That would mean that nearly 85% of VJ members would be dumped within a year? I have been around here for 2.5 years and I can't say I have seen anything like that, especially not in the RUB forum. I would be interested to see where that comes from. The stats I saw (and I do not remember where I found that report, but it was on the internet, big surprise) specifically ruled out those fiancees that did not marry their petitioner. To simply say someone "left" and to include that as a "divorce statistic" is not right. That would be like comparing the number of people a person dates but does not marry and calling it a divorce statistic. I am not sure what they mean by "left within one year" Doesn't seem like 85% of RUB women leave in 1 year. I would think I would KNOW at least one if the rate is that high.

Other than the specific items, such as number 9 above, the reasons for divorce sound more or less consistent with other divorces. I would also suggest the "princess" syndrome is in no way a RUB exclusive.

[slim 1,523]

(2) “Princess Born”: “I’m young and beautiful, I give you great sex, you are my debtor, why aren’t you a movie hero?” Not that I think anything will happen with Sim and his wife, I could just hear his way of typing her accent in there.

My wife is not princess.... she is queen. "How you event can sink I am printcess? I am not printcess.... I AM QUEEN!"

In all seriousness, she is the walking, talking, personification of that #9 profile. But, I don't kiss her @$$ and treat her like a queen. As a matter of fact, I'm probably the only person in this whole wide world that doesn't, and I think that's why it works for us. I've stuck to my guns from day one and will until infinity so the ball is firmly in her court as to whether or not it works.

If she wishes to "reign" in another kingdom, that's her business. But, around here, I could care less whether she's the princess, the queen, or simply a concubine... because I am the king!

17% of fiancees remain past one year!!!???? That would mean that nearly 85% of VJ members would be dumped within a year?

I think those stats are flipped. From what I've always heard, there's an 80% success rate with international marriages from any country. It's like, "After all this bull$#!t, we're staying married!"

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

My wife is not princess.... she is queen. "How you event can sink I am printcess? I am not printcess.... I AM QUEEN!"

In all seriousness, she is the walking, talking, personification of that #9 profile. But, I don't kiss her @$$ and treat her like a queen. As a matter of fact, I'm probably the only person in this whole wide world that doesn't, and I think that's why it works for us. I've stuck to my guns from day one and will until infinity so the ball is firmly in her court as to whether or not it works.

If she wishes to "reign" in another kingdom, that's her business. But, around here, I could care less whether she's the princess, the queen, or simply a concubine... because I am the king!

I think those stats are flipped. From what I've always heard, there's an 80% success rate with international marriages from any country. It's like, "After all this bull$#!t, we're staying married!"

I would have to agree. The only survey I ever saw showed an 81% success rate after 10 years. Oh, well.

Alla pretty much gets what she wants but she is not a Princess by any means. I think many years of being a single Mom and giving up stuff for her sons made her pretty mellow. A manicure and a pair of shoes from TJ Maxx rank right up there with going to Disney World. She really is pretty easy to please. In fact, she takes on a lot for herself and her life could be considerably easier than it is.

[Tnic 5]

Well, another belated congrats going out.

I know you'll do your level best to keep your part of Vermont warm and safe from bears.

Mila doesn't seem to be concerned with bacteria...

[slim 1,523]

Mila doesn't seem to be concerned with bacteria...

Bacteria concerns only start after that ring stops shining.

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

Slim may appreciate this. I do a lot of shooting but I stopped hunting years ago after my father and best hunting buddy died. So Alla rarely goes to the gun club with me, usually it is the boys and it is our night to shoot and eat good gamboorgers or especially the grilled chicken sandwich at the club snack bar plus the best damn clam chowder I ever tasted..anyway, Alla decided to come with us last Thursday and watch us shoot skeet.

After which she announced that we were truly deadeye shots, (not really, I added that part...but she SHOULD have said it) it didn't seem a practical use of money or ammunition and that she would be more pleased if we would kill some of these turkeys around here and eat them.

I am not sure how to break the news to her that hunting is not a cheap way to gather meat.

Edited September 19, 2010 by Gary and Alla

[slim 1,523]

You could take her with you out in the woods. Lots of fun!

[amberdima 6]

congratulations