Indian planning to marry older black american women

[SimAsh 0]

I can't add one word on what Loto said

Good luck

Sam

Indeed. well said

[Nik+Heather 121]

NM, found the answer to my question.

Edited September 10, 2010 by Nik+Heather

[thongd4me 69]

The age difference is 11 years.She is 40 and am 29.I will be attending in chennai..We know each other for 3 months online..we will be meeting face to face in november.

I knew my fiancée for over 6 years before I filed for the visa - not a question of being sure of each other but of other things outside our control.

However the age difference was the opposite - male 10 yrs older.

There's no rule that says you have to rush into this, but if she doesn't have children already it's not too late for her to have them.

Therefore, you have a lot less time to get it done.

Also, if you say at the age of 29 that you don't intend to have kids or adopt (if she is unable to have them herself),

that will raise a red flag because it is unusual for an Indian male not to want kids with marriage.

Also, when couples talk about kids or no kids before marriage sometimes one or both will change their minds.

These changes can be sympathetic (in agreement) or unsympathetic.

You also have to be ready for this.

When we met in person (about 14 months after meeting online) both were pre-disposed to

thinking about making it permanent, but we were both free to change our minds (we didn't).

I have met many folks that I thought were very compatible online, but when we met in real life

it was day changing into night and it was just an hour spent together for coffee, no more.

Doing international travel to meet certainly raises the stakes.

[Fianceevisa 0]

Once you have arrived in the US you will also benefit by the approval of HER family (and friends) in the AOS process.

Thanks..her family happy with the marriage..

[sachinky 465]

If it was Delhi, I'd say you have about zero chances of getting this visa approved.

You might have better luck at Chennai, though.

I certainly wouldn't rush into anything at this point.

You have numerous red flags and you need to overcome them. (Prior application abandoned, online meeting, short courtship, no family approval on your side, older black USC fiancee, past child-bearing age -- sounds horrible, I know but you know the drill).

Edited September 10, 2010 by sachinky

[thongd4me 69]

Thanks..her family happy with the marriage..

When I went there first neither of us talked about marriage.

By the time I had to leave she was calling me "my husband" and I had no problem with that.

If you have proposed marriage and she accepted online that is great,

but be warned that there will be adjustments both of you have to make

when you meet in real life.

Neither of you knows what it is like to be in the physical presence of the other,

let alone have physical intimacy. Sometimes odd habits/quirks are deal-breakers.

It's good to have her family on board, but already they are filled with expectations

that may or may not be fulfilled.

I wish you the sincerest best of luck.

[Hadiza 1]

Sachinky, I agree with you 100%.

[catknit 144]

One thing [or two or three] to add that may help the process go smoother; have her visit more than once before the interview.

I'd also recommend that she try to be present at the interview.

If she has limited vacation time available do more, shorter trips rather than one long trip. It seems a little counterintuitive but I had 3 different attorneys [all with different methods/theories about immigration] say that three separate week trips means a lot more on paper than one 3-week trip.

Of course, this all may be putting the cart before the horse since you haven't yet met...know that this can be a bumpy trip [like twisted k I suffered through a denial at Delhi also - our big red flags were a divorce on my side/minor age difference with me [the chick] being older/mixed religion].

[Bec_Dipu 103]

Hello All,

I am 29 old man working in india, i met women aged 40 online and we decided to get marry. She is planning to visit me in November and once she leave i will apply for an fiancee visa.

I would like to know from all you honest opinion about how to prepare for myself for the process.

1. I am 29 and she is 40 black american, myself applied H1b in year 2008 and got 221g, but didn't respond to it and got expired.

2.Have travelled UK twice on a work permit.

3. My parents will not agree myself marrying someone older and from outside our race.so i am planning to keep it as a secret from them.

4.Planning to show evidence of ourself took pictures together ,hotel reciept and engagement ring reciept.

Please fell free to comment on the case.

Thanks in advance

My fiance and I are also wondering about our fate as he is a 32 year old India Muslim and I am a 34 year white Christian. We love each other deeply and have spent over 100 days together between his trips to the US and mine to India. My family knows all about him and they've met over Skype but his family knows nothing about me as they will make his life miserable trying to set him up with other women if they find out that he's engaged to an "older" woman who is also overweight. We've decided not to tell them until the Visa is approved as our relationship is none of their business and why make him suffer needlessly while waiting for application to be approved.

I'm nervous about all of the Delhi consulate reviews I've read, several applicants have had their family called during the interview of been asked for letters of approval from them. Several people have also been asked for additional evidence such as pictures from an engagement party or of the families meeting. My fiance proposed over the phone and hasn't been back to the US since July, so we haven't had an engagement party. We have proof that he met my grandparents, by my parents weren't able to meet him while he was in the US last year. I haven't been able to meet his family as my trips to India have all been two weeks and required me to stay in Delhi for work; his family lives in Guwahati, not exactly a weekend trip.

I hope our interviewer doesn't take a traditional Indian approach and send us into review because we're not a traditional Indian couple. Or, Heaven forbid, deny us. If so, we'll meet in Europe and elope and then I'll just move to India and apply for a K3 instead. I'll get the last laugh!

Have you submitted your application yet? If so, where are you in the process?

[pushbrk 12,895]

Thanks.My question would be whether age difference/different race parents disapproval ,my H1b visa 221g in 2008 will have an impact on my application. If yes.how can i tackle this.

Yes, both will impact the amount of scrutiny your case gets at interview. First, build a bona fide relationship and build evidence that the relationship is bona fide. In this kind of case, a single visit is probably not enough, no matter what else you do. Read, study and ask questions about similar cases in the India regional forum. You have an uphill battle convincing a Consular officer your relationship is about more than simply obtaining an immigration benefit. For example, based on what you've written, I'm not convinced. That doesn't mean I'm right, just that so far, I'm not convinced. Of course, you haven't even met yet.

[Pedro Thiago 2]

Does a red flag for race difference only apply to certain areas? I was under the impression that a very large number of VJ users were married outside of their race. In my case I am in a relationship with a girl of a different race among whom interracial marriages are not terribly common, but I have met my fiance's family and they have given me their full approval and we even developed a good relationship.

[pushbrk 12,895]

Does a red flag for race difference only apply to certain areas? I was under the impression that a very large number of VJ users were married outside of their race. In my case I am in a relationship with a girl of a different race among whom interracial marriages are not terribly common, but I have met my fiance's family and they have given me their full approval and we even developed a good relationship.

Pretty much every red flag issue is localized, as to its impact. Race, religion and culture all impact any red flag issue, particularly the reverse age difference issue.

[Pedro Thiago 2]

Pretty much every red flag issue is localized, as to its impact. Race, religion and culture all impact any red flag issue, particularly the reverse age difference issue.

Wow, that's a suprise for me. I hadn't realized all of that was taken into account. My fiance is older than me but by less than 2 years and we are both in our twenties so I don't think it should be too glaring a difference. I guess the evidence of a genuine relationship is most important here though.

[pushbrk 12,895]

Wow, that's a suprise for me. I hadn't realized all of that was taken into account. My fiance is older than me but by less than 2 years and we are both in our twenties so I don't think it should be too glaring a difference. I guess the evidence of a genuine relationship is most important here though.

That little an age difference is not anything of concern in any age group because it's common in any culture.

[Aztec&Taino 144]

Hello All,

I am 29 old man working in india, i met women aged 40 online and we decided to get marry. She is planning to visit me in November and once she leave i will apply for an fiancee visa.

I would like to know from all you honest opinion about how to prepare for myself for the process.

1. I am 29 and she is 40 black american, myself applied H1b in year 2008 and got 221g, but didn't respond to it and got expired.

2.Have travelled UK twice on a work permit.

3. My parents will not agree myself marrying someone older and from outside our race.so i am planning to keep it as a secret from them.

4.Planning to show evidence of ourself took pictures together ,hotel reciept and engagement ring reciept.

Please fell free to comment on the case.

Thanks in advance

Firstly, the US citizen will need to be the petitioner, not you. Secondly, rather than calling your girlfriend "black American" it would be more correct to say African-American. Thirdly, your parents opposition to your engagement may indeed be very important in determining whether to grant you the fiance visa as it is traditional in your culture and country to require parental consent/agreement to engagement. As to the age difference, how common is it in your culture for a man to marry an older woman? If it is highly uncommon, then it might raise another red flag in the consul's eyes the day your interview would come. Also, if your fiancee only visits you once during the whole process it will appear to be suspicious and will appear to be for immigration purposes only.