obese & neglected children removed from home

[trillium13 84]

First of all, how does a 5 year old get to weigh that much? Especially one who is so obviously NOT being cared for?

Secondly, if you don't want to take care of children, DON'T HAVE THEM. It's not that hard.

[Fandango 1,439]

Yes but the picture changed

for the love of God

Who doesn't take care of their parents?

Josephine has never met my mother in person but she would kill me if I did something like that not that I would.

As an aside, for some reason, I thought you were female.

I still cannot fathom what 160 looks like on a 5 year old. It's practically a death sentence!

[Peikko 1,575]

Yes but the picture changed

for the love of God

Who doesn't take care of their parents?

Josephine has never met my mother in person but she would kill me if I did something like that not that I would.

I have sigs switched off, so I can't see avatar pictures - if that is what you meant.

I also have dyslexia with your handle, I see evil1966, quite worrying

[nab 74]

Payback's a ######.....

LAKE MARY, Fla. -- Investigators in Seminole County say they've discovered a bizarre problem: adult children are dropping off their elderly parents at hotels and motels, and abandoning them."A lot of the local hotels seem to be getting seniors that are just dropped off by their kids," said Officer Zach Hudson of the Lake Mary Police Department.One man was left at the La Quinta Inn in Lake Mary for several weeks."Two different times he fell out of his bed during the midnight shift. We didn't know about it. We had people call up, saying there's a gentleman in this room, he's screaming for help," said Chris Loker of La Quinta Inn.The problem comes down to money."A lot of these nursing homes are too expensive for the kids, much less their elderly parents," Hudson said.Part of the problem is the hotels and motels are neither trained nor equipped to take on the elderly people, especially since some of the senior citizens have medical issues that require medical treatment.But, Officer Hudson told WFTV, when parents are left at the hotels to fend for themselves no crime has been committed."Fifty years ago you had four generations living under one roof. Now, now not," Loker said.Hotels said, many times, they have to call 911 to get immediate care for the senior citizens who are dropped off.

http://www.wftv.com/news/24694944/detail.html?cxntlid=cmg_cntnt_rss

Jokes aside. It is horrible.

i used to think it was horrible for people to put their parents in a nursing home (dropping off at a hotel/motel is HORRIBLE!) but someone once said to me that it was payback for being raised by nannys/babysitters. it gave me food for thought, because in the US people have grown away from teaching their children respect for their elders... and children are not cared for like they should be and are not taught properly. we isolate our children in institutions with same age peers, we isolate our old people in institutions with same age peers, and then everyone wonders why there is no understanding between generations? no compassion in children for the elderly?

/soapbox mode OFF

[Fandango 1,439]

i used to think it was horrible for people to put their parents in a nursing home (dropping off at a hotel/motel is HORRIBLE!) but someone once said to me that it was payback for being raised by nannys/babysitters. it gave me food for thought, because in the US people have grown away from teaching their children respect for their elders... and children are not cared for like they should be and are not taught properly. we isolate our children in institutions with same age peers, we isolate our old people in institutions with same age peers, and then everyone wonders why there is no understanding between generations? no compassion in children for the elderly?

/soapbox mode OFF

I think the whole 'nursing home' issue is far too complex unless you've been in that situation. I was once like everyone else who said 'oh that sucks, they don't care about that person, just threw her away in a nursing home, etc'....well, my ex's g-ma had Alzheimer's. She'd turn the stove on and all the burners on in the middle of the night, leave the house at 4 to go for a bike ride, etc. The family did try to contain her, but everyone worked too. So they hired peeps to watch the lady. But her nighttime antics were proving to be dangerous - to herself, and the rest of the fam...and they did wind up placing her somewhere. To me, that doesn't show 'no compassion' or 'payback for being raised by nannies' but at the end of the day, when you can't handle the care, what are you supposed to do?

A lady at work is dealing with the same thing. Her mom is 80 something. She lives with my colleague, calls the office 40 times a day. My colleague is always leaving various times a day to run home She's a single woman, and is trying very hard to 'the right thing' by her mother, but it's killing her, and putting her job in jeopardy.

[Jenn! 918]

My mother (who's not even 50 yet so she has a long while before she gets to that point) always says how she will want to be in a nursing home. I feel the same way. It's part of my family's mentality to not want to be a burden on the rest of the family.

My husband thinks that's horrible and insists that parents should live with their children until they die. I'm sure his opinion is influenced by the fact that it is the women in the family that will do the caretaking, not the men. I wonder how he'd feel about changing his mother's diaper or bathing her, you know? Paying lip service to the noble concept of caring for one's elderly parents is a lot different from actually having to do it.

[nab 74]

i understand there are many 'for' nursing homes... and that there's a need in soem cases. every family is different.

i come from a family where, while i did not live with my grandparents, i was with them every weekend and very very close to them. family was very important to my grandma. my aunt had all her kids, their spouses, and all their children under her roof (well, my uncle's too LOL but in our family the house is the woman's domain). when the youngest two got married and pregnant within months of each other my aunt/uncle decided it was time to split off a piece of property for each of the children to build their own homes.

as far as illness/alzheimer disease, yes, i understand it is very difficult. it's not possible for only ONE person to deal with them; you HAVE to sleep sometime! one of my uncles took several family members to care for him and even with help my aunt was worn out but it was soemthing she wanted, to kepe him home with her until the end. it is a horrible disease taking a loved one from you while they're still alive.

he would forget (then at the end didnt even know) my grandma, he thought my aunt was his mother. even with help he still wandered off, he was always drawn to the park when he was at grandma's. i think somehow he did remember growing up there and the park was a happy place for him.

EVERY place i have ever lived since i left home at 16yo has had an extra bed/s for family to stay if/when needed. it's just the way i was reared. my brother has stayed with me many times. when i bought this house, since it was going to be my "forever" home i made sure it had a complete area where if my father needed to live with us someday he would have all the comforts of home, as well as separate entrance so he could still feel independent... he is a fiercely independent person, i couldnt/wouldnt put him in a nursing home. my father he sat with me as a baby while i was in hospital with broken legs, he fought for me and then took care of me back when it was not common for men to get custody. my father took care of one of my brothers as his own, who is not even blood to him, when his mother abandoned him. he helped people out all his life, he was a great example in that way... no way i wouldnt take care of him.

[caybee 21]

[caybee 21]

Here's a story, audio and text included, about one option to help care for aging loved. From the story:

"How's the weather down there?"

That voice comes from a woman who appears on a computer monitor next to the kitchen table.

"Oh, that's Denise," Edward explains. "That's our good friend!"

Actually, Denise Cady is what's called a "telecaregiver," and for two years she has been checking on the Fitzgeralds every evening from Lafayette, Ind. She joins in the mealtime chatter just like a friend who dropped by. Cady asks about the Fitzgeralds' family and neighbors, swaps jokes about the hot weather and chats with Colleen about the meal.

"Oooh, looks good," Cady says. "Are those fresh green beans?"

The scene may not seem so strange in the era of Skype, when many people use the computer to keep in touch with far-flung relatives. But Cady can see almost every move the Fitzgeralds make. Their house is wired with video cameras, like something out of a sci-fi movie, though, at first, you don’t notice it.

My parents are planning to move to a retirement community eventually, which will serve as long-term care when that time comes as well. My mom has already embraced Skype, and we might opt for something like this when the time comes, though my sisters and I would be more likely to keep watch ourselves.

[nab 74]

Here's a story, audio and text included, about one option to help care for aging loved. From the story:

My parents are planning to move to a retirement community eventually, which will serve as long-term care when that time comes as well. My mom has already embraced Skype, and we might opt for something like this when the time comes, though my sisters and I would be more likely to keep watch ourselves.

the wired thing is awesome idea for those who are worried about their folks but the folks want to stay in their home! i love this story, it gives people more options.

an elderly friend of mine was like that, she wanted to stay in her home... it's where she was most happy till her husband passed, it's where she brought up her children, it's where she had begun a new (and much better) life with her husband back when she was young and after all life she didnt want to leave it. but her daughter was only one taking care of her and trying to work 2 jobs, her son had moved all way cross country to start his family with new wife and though he called once a week that wasnt enough. so she would call me and we would stay on phone as i went about my day, just clip the phone to my side and thank God for headphones! my son thought of her as an adopted grandma and she loved him as well. definitely the video thing would have been nice for her son so he could have had more contact, though honestly i dont think he wanted or he would have called more often.

she also had one of those things where if you fall you can push a button but she wouldnt wear it = stubborn, independent, even though she coudnt get around at all. she stayed in one room all day (other than potty) so she wasnt risking too much walking around with no one there but i was only 6 miles away if she needed me.

but that video thing is cool since there is so much of the population aging... i never would have thought of using it like that even though my husband and i are usually connected by yahoo call all time.