Absurd

[elmcitymaven 9,712]

I would have posted this 10 minutes ago, however, I've just had a major screaming fit from the spider I found crawling ON MY SHOULDER.

And put it all in perspective. Are even HALF the things that are getting to people worth them getting their knickers in a twist for?

Poor Mags!

Let's all put our big girl pants on and just leave this alone.

[Nik+Heather 121]

you have NO idea what went down in that thread that Jill at least began this thread talking about (though discussion seems to have drifted a bit to VJ at large). It's very simple: some people doled out tough love, with no mocking and no TOS violations. None.

Not sure that's true, the last part of the thread I read went like:

Oh, please can't I join your clique and be cool like you?

Why yes, yes, you can, grasshopper...just be b!tchier.

At least, I assumed it was mocking, and sort of amusing in the same vein as barefoot-and-preggo-womens-chained-to-the-stove jokes are. I guess if I had started a thread and felt like it had gotten to the point where other members were coaching each other on how to respond more snarkily to me (or questions similar to mine) I would have thought hard about asserting my same OP right to ask that it be invized.

[TBoneTX 45,288]

the other invisibilised thread was shirorisu having a full-scale meltdown

This is what gets me. Seemingly all of her threads, in various fora, extended for pages & pages of people pouring their hearts & brains out, and then all of a sudden, without warning or notice, the threads vanished permanently. By her request? If not, by whose action and in accordance with what rationale?

I was struck by Happy Bunny's comment toward the end of one of the older linked threads (the 17-pager?) to the effect that "once posted, the post no longer belongs to the OP." To use shirorisu's posts as an objective example, YES we could weary of the frantic emotions therein, but YES others could also benefit from reading the exhaustive advice that well-meaning posters poured into those threads, most with much effort and thought. By deleting such entire threads or making them invisible, the respondents' work, time, thoughts, and beliefs are being disrespected -- all on the word & whim of one person (the OP).

I believe that threads should be locked but left visible unless they're blatantly offensive (TOS-offending level) or they advocate illegal practices with regard to the immigration process. Thoughts?

Edited August 13, 2010 by TBoneTX

[Brad and Vika 129]

This is what gets me. Seemingly all of her threads, in various fora, extended for pages & pages of people pouring their hearts & brains out, and then all of a sudden, without warning or notice, the threads vanished permanently. By her request? If not, by whose action and in accordance with what rationale?

I was struck by Happy Bunny's comment toward the end of one of the older linked threads (the 17-pager?) to the effect that "once posted, the post no longer belongs to the OP." To use shirorisu's posts as an objective example, YES we could weary of the frantic emotions therein, but YES others could also benefit from reading the exhaustive advice that well-meaning posters poured into those threads, most with much effort and thought. By deleting such entire threads or making them invisible, the respondents' work, time, thoughts, and beliefs are being disrespected -- all on the word & whim of one person (the OP).

I believe that threads should be locked but left visible unless they're blatantly offensive (TOS-offending level) or they advocate illegal practices with regard to the immigration process. Thoughts?

As a new addition to the mod team, I have to "fess up" that I have wondered about that very same thing. When mcat requested that several of his threads be closed, I believed that much of the information would be useful to vjers who were perhaps making, or about to make, the same mistakes he apparently did. I will ask around.

[Rob and Jill 82]

I believe that threads should be locked but left visible unless they're blatantly offensive (TOS-offending level) or they advocate illegal practices with regard to the immigration process. Thoughts?

EXACTLY my point! Yet, somehow I am the bad guy for pointing it out...

Not sure that's true, the last part of the thread I read went like:

Oh, please can't I join your clique and be cool like you?

Why yes, yes, you can, grasshopper...just be b!tchier.

At least, I assumed it was mocking, and sort of amusing in the same vein as barefoot-and-preggo-womens-chained-to-the-stove jokes are. I guess if I had started a thread and felt like it had gotten to the point where other members were coaching each other on how to respond more snarkily to me (or questions similar to mine) I would have thought hard about asserting my same OP right to ask that it be invized.

Thank you Nik + Heather. Case and point. Apparently I am not the only person who sees this going on.

[*julez* 124]

Serioulsy, you just need to lighten up on all this! We (in the now-invisible thread) were really trying to make light of the situation. It is so refreshing to encounter a new member who isn't freaking out about every little detail. Again, it was all very much tongue in cheek. You really need to stop taking all this stuff so seriously. If you could just lighten up, you'd enjoy yourself so much more. Let it go...let it go...this is smaller than you know....

[TBoneTX 45,288]

Serioulsy, you just need to lighten up on all this! We (in the now-invisible thread) were really trying to make light of the situation. It is so refreshing to encounter a new member who isn't freaking out about every little detail. Again, it was all very much tongue in cheek. You really need to stop taking all this stuff so seriously. If you could just lighten up, you'd enjoy yourself so much more. Let it go...let it go...this is smaller than you know....

Whom precisely dost thou addresseth as regardeths the above, verily, wot? (Waxing Elizabethan here, in tribute to the UK Forumites, si man, eh, verily, wot.)

[^_^ 5,021]

Uh, wot?

[*julez* 124]

Whom precisely dost thou addresseth as regardeths the above, verily, wot? (Waxing Elizabethan here, in tribute to the UK Forumites, si man, eh, verily, wot.)

To the post directly before mine. (aka the OP)

[elmcitymaven 9,712]

Serioulsy, you just need to lighten up on all this! We (in the now-invisible thread) were really trying to make light of the situation. It is so refreshing to encounter a new member who isn't freaking out about every little detail. Again, it was all very much tongue in cheek. You really need to stop taking all this stuff so seriously. If you could just lighten up, you'd enjoy yourself so much more. Let it go...let it go...this is smaller than you know....

I guess it's just that we don't want anyone to stress themselves out too much about this, particularly when their cases are straightforward (and 9 out of 10 cases in the UK forum are cookie cutter K1s -- sorry, I know you're all unique, but it goes the same way for most of you). Some of the biggest freakers-out (I'm looking in the mirror) in the initial stages turned into the least freaked when it came to removing conditions. (Eh, f^ck photos, joint bank account.) We want you all to be HAPPY and RELAXED in this process. Really! And we do it all, as Julez says, very much with our tongues in our collective cheeks. Please, PLEASE don't see this as us mocking you. Couldn't be further from the truth. We want you to be one of us -- more relaxed, less worried about the small stuff.

Hug? Digestive biscuit?

[Rebecca Jo 1,962]

Hug? Digestive biscuit?

Gin?

[elmcitymaven 9,712]

Gin?

For you Johnny, anything. But you'll have to share it with me.

[Rebecca Jo 1,962]

For you Johnny, anything. But you'll have to share it with me.

I only share my booze on days that end in Y.

[elmcitymaven 9,712]

I only share my booze on days that end in Y.

Oh.

WAIT

OH!

[Pooky 3,784]

My booze only gets sheared if you can find me ....