Ukrainian Couples... What did you bring?

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

Independence will help a lot with her emotional state. At minimum, it'll take away one excuse.

Still though, that must've taken a significant amount of the money she brought with her or money she earned after arrival to purchase.

Fun isn't a household expense too?

Neither. It was a good year end bonus. About the only thing good about bonuses last year.

No, fun is not in the budget. Bills, school, etc. But really we have enough for fun and Alla spends no more on shes and clothes than I do for skeet shooting. Fair is fair. Everyone is off on Friday so we will raid the "Fun fund" and go to Montreal for the day. We have to plan it yet, have to have a plan. Detailed, for both if it rains or there is sun. I still think the best movie line of all time was Fred Thompson in "Hunt for Red October" ..."Son, the average Russkie doesn't take a dump without a plan!"

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

I think for Vika it was 6-12 months from arrival. It also depends on her activity level, even now. I understand that people are much more sociable in Eastern Europe (at least I think so). She hates to sit around, and starts getting irritable after a week or so. I just start relaxing after a week of sitting around .

Right now balloon head is back from Ukraine for four days and hasn't called. It is driving Vika totally batshit. She doesn't want to call first and appear too eager, but the silence is breaking her down. I suspect that for GF, my wife is one of a long list of people to call and catch up with. Lord only knows how long it will take to discuss and savor every moment of her time there

Maybe so, or maybe the pendulum will swing the other way. I know her husband hopes it will settle her.

Yeah, or it could be some game to see who will call HER! Alla gets nervous if she sits around for 15 minutes and isn't sleeping. She gets nervous if I sit around for 15 minutes and even more nervous when I am sleeping.

[Brad and Vika 129]

Yeah, or it could be some game to see who will call HER! Alla gets nervous if she sits around for 15 minutes and isn't sleeping. She gets nervous if I sit around for 15 minutes and even more nervous when I am sleeping.

GF called first, saying she was sooo busy, but had to make a PLAN to get together later this week.

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

GF called first, saying she was sooo busy, but had to make a PLAN to get together later this week.

Alla has one of those "daytimer" books we used in the 1980s to keep our schedules. She calls it her "copy book" (???) She has to have the kind which has one full page for each day and she writes everything in there! When she arrived she had more stuff in there and more "appointments" and "meetings" I thought...How does an unemployed person with no car stay so busy?

Mostly I didn't look at the book as I am not a nosey kind of person, but a few times I write things in there for her and I notice she has "meetings" scheduled weeks in advance with her friends for coffee..."manicure", and "color hair" written in way in advance...

She was on the phone last night with Svitlana 3 (the pharmacist from Moldova) for a couple hours to plan our trip to Montreal fro Friday. After 2 hours, so far we are leaving at 9am and we have to be back by 6:30 because Pasha has to work at 7pm. (so much for everyone having a day off) I am driving because we can all fit in the minivan, including her son, but Svita will pay for parking. I suggested parking for free in the South Shore suburbs and taking the metro (Montreal has the most awesome subway you ever want to ride) but NO they want to park downtown. So far...that's it. When we will leave and where we will park and Gary will find a place for lunch. Viande Feu for all! (smoked meat!) I now know it was RUSSIANS that set up all those stupid meetings I had to go to for years in which it was decided "the problem is worse than we thought and we need another meeting"

[slim 1,525]

Fair is fair.

Sounds like it.

"the problem is worse than we thought and we need another meeting"

Nothing like a meeting to plan a meeting.

[Brad and Vika 129]

Nothing like a meeting to plan a meeting.

Don't forget the post meeting wrap-up session, or the scheduling conference for the next meeting.

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

Don't forget the post meeting wrap-up session, or the scheduling conference for the next meeting.

Vomit Icon please! I am SO glad I am past that point in my career. SO glad.

[slim 1,525]

Vomit Icon please! I am SO glad I am past that point in my career. SO glad.

My supervisors HATE me at meetings. I bring a book chock-full of questions I've thought of and jotted down over the quarter. I try to get a good 15 minutes added on to the end with interesting, and more importantly, challenging questions. Nothing like seeing a smooth meeting go south at the very end when the big guy is tapdancing around answers he obviously either doesn't know, or has no good answer as to why we're still doing it that way even though it's unproductive and a better way exists.

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

My supervisors HATE me at meetings. I bring a book chock-full of questions I've thought of and jotted down over the quarter. I try to get a good 15 minutes added on to the end with interesting, and more importantly, challenging questions. Nothing like seeing a smooth meeting go south at the very end when the big guy is tapdancing around answers he obviously either doesn't know, or has no good answer as to why we're still doing it that way even though it's unproductive and a better way exists.

Fun while it lasts, but I would rather just not go...so I don't anymore. And now they can just shove it if they don't like it. I just don't go. I do not say I won't go, I just don't go. I have found if I keep my mouth shut, they just ignore me and no one mentions it. Sometimes I get a call to the effect of "Oh I was going to ask you when I saw you at the meeting but..." And I say "Yes, what can I do for you?" Then they ask and I answer...and...no meeting needed.

[slim 1,525]

Fun while it lasts, but I would rather just not go...so I don't anymore. And now they can just shove it if they don't like it. I just don't go. I do not say I won't go, I just don't go. I have found if I keep my mouth shut, they just ignore me and no one mentions it. Sometimes I get a call to the effect of "Oh I was going to ask you when I saw you at the meeting but..." And I say "Yes, what can I do for you?" Then they ask and I answer...and...no meeting needed.

Kind of what I'm doing now too. No more meetings for me.

[easyukraine 1]

Fun thread guys thanks for the laughs.

[slim 1,525]

Fun thread guys thanks for the laughs.

That's what we're here for.

[zqt3344 21]

Oh great you again!

Not a K-1 fiance(e) visa topic.... moving thread

[belarus1 0]

This thread has been a good read! Svetlana has been here for 10 months and have been married for 8 of those and we have experienced quite the roller coaster of emotions. It seems the two key issues are her family and 21 year old son back in Belarus and her total lack of understanding about $ and finances here. Probably the biggest of the two issues is her son. He specifically stated he had no interest in moving here even though I offered it and of course now its too late to get a visa for him since its been past one year since our K1 approval. Svetlana cant seem to wrap her head around the fact that it will be nearly impossible for him to come and visit here on a tourist visa and her mom is too afraid to "leave the village" to fly here even though she could probably get a visa. This has just about been our undoing on numerous occassions.

Sveta has been driving for a while and has a part time job making only "small money" as she says even though in the same breath she says "I already saved in 4 months enough $ to live for almost 3 years in Belarus!

$ totally freaks her out, she always feels she is one step from living on the street and says that if something happens to me my family would kick her out on the sreet and not care about her. I try and explain to her about the life insurance I have that would take care of her if something happened to me not to mention that all the $ in my bank accounts would be her's and the house too.

Before she came here she literally had only one pair of jeans, two dresses and a few shirts and sweaters and 3 pair of shoes to her name and since being here between myself and my family who have taken great joy in helping her/us get our household in order has managed to establish quite a wardrobe;) Although she will rarely wear things since she still has that saving mentality and is afraid to get something dirty.

She just marvels and the cheap prices here and the ability to be able to return things if you dont like them. I/we have purchased and sent back to Belarus tons of shoes, clothes etc...to her family.

Sveta just left for a 6 week trip back home to help with the garden etc... and her suitcases were filled with things for everybody back home. Here is the short list:shoes, clothes, perfume, pencils, towels, blood preasure monitors (for mom and aunt), 5 jars of peanut butter, lots of chocolates, toys and last but not least 3 sets of swimming goggles for her nephew.

Homesickness has been a huge issue at about month 8 until now, Im just hoping that in time she will settle down and realize that this marriage is the best thing that ever happend to her or her family.

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

This thread has been a good read! Svetlana has been here for 10 months and have been married for 8 of those and we have experienced quite the roller coaster of emotions. It seems the two key issues are her family and 21 year old son back in Belarus and her total lack of understanding about $ and finances here. Probably the biggest of the two issues is her son. He specifically stated he had no interest in moving here even though I offered it and of course now its too late to get a visa for him since its been past one year since our K1 approval. Svetlana cant seem to wrap her head around the fact that it will be nearly impossible for him to come and visit here on a tourist visa and her mom is too afraid to "leave the village" to fly here even though she could probably get a visa. This has just about been our undoing on numerous occassions.

Sveta has been driving for a while and has a part time job making only "small money" as she says even though in the same breath she says "I already saved in 4 months enough $ to live for almost 3 years in Belarus!

$ totally freaks her out, she always feels she is one step from living on the street and says that if something happens to me my family would kick her out on the sreet and not care about her. I try and explain to her about the life insurance I have that would take care of her if something happened to me not to mention that all the $ in my bank accounts would be her's and the house too.

Before she came here she literally had only one pair of jeans, two dresses and a few shirts and sweaters and 3 pair of shoes to her name and since being here between myself and my family who have taken great joy in helping her/us get our household in order has managed to establish quite a wardrobe;) Although she will rarely wear things since she still has that saving mentality and is afraid to get something dirty.

She just marvels and the cheap prices here and the ability to be able to return things if you dont like them. I/we have purchased and sent back to Belarus tons of shoes, clothes etc...to her family.

Sveta just left for a 6 week trip back home to help with the garden etc... and her suitcases were filled with things for everybody back home. Here is the short list:shoes, clothes, perfume, pencils, towels, blood preasure monitors (for mom and aunt), 5 jars of peanut butter, lots of chocolates, toys and last but not least 3 sets of swimming goggles for her nephew.

Homesickness has been a huge issue at about month 8 until now, Im just hoping that in time she will settle down and realize that this marriage is the best thing that ever happend to her or her family.

Alla had some of the same feelings about being out in the cold in something happened to me. Especially so after I had a heart attack and bypass surgery last December. But since then I have gone over in detail all the "protections" plus we have met with my brother who understands completely the immigration process we are doing and what to do regarding that. We will file for her removal of conditions in October. At any rate, no she understands that if I die, she would be better off! I am one of those guys that is definitely worth more dead!

For your wife, her best bet would be to file an I-130 for her son when she becomes a citizen, that is about your only chance now. At his age, the K-2, either with hers or "to follow" was his only chance.

In our case, we could have filed for an I-130 later if needed, but our sons were not really given a "choice". They are permanent residents and will remain so until they become citizens. At that point (and when they finish their education) they can choose to live where they want to.