HELP PLEASE--- GOING THROUGH HELL

[Married2009 32]

It's not just the guys who are behind you on this. You face potential violence everytime you go to work, you should not have to face it at home too. You need to file a report to protect yourself from her accusations. It would be a shame to lose your job over a lie.

[NutMagnet 2]

"C'mon! HIT ME - send me to the shelter!"

Which I couldn't do as I was always busy picking up all the stuff from the overturned bookcases before it was trampled upon, plus being distracted and hurt by such repeated, loud, out of nature behaviour, is enough to make one's head spin. For three months this ####### went on, every other day.

Forget the air ticket to Florida. Send her HOME and tell her that you will send her to Florida after you have time to think and save money. Something like that, much easier to deal with when she is out of the country.

Write the USCIS and withdraw and disavow your obligation to act as sponsor under the I-864 Affadavit of Support. Contrary to the misbeliefs regarding withdrawing sponsorship on this site, it is quite feasible with a simple letter, prior to the issuance of her 10 year green card.

Permanent Residency can not be adjudicated without an Affidavit of Support. So withdraw it.

[thongd4me 69]

Thank you to those that have responded. I am a police officer and im usually givening the advice and taking reports like this.

Now that it is me in this situation i really dont know what to do. I defenitly will not continue with this realtionship. I am looking for the easiest way out of this.

I could have and still can presss charges on her but im trying to be a big guy here and just part our ways. I will be witdrawing the AOS and any support ASAP.

Its sad when i really do love this girl and her family and this is the thanks i get. *

She feels like i will be loosing alot. I wont be loosing anything.

I have explained to her that the time, money and stress was worth it but the abuse is not.

*You might want to review your commitment to the words "in love" -

sometimes a partner will do flirty things that make us feel that they

are the sexiest in the world - that might be called being "in lust"...

My wife does a lot of the "flirty things" - no slouch in that department,

but the things she does to make me feel it's love are how she supports

me with every thought and action and honors me above all others.

[payxibka 10,045]

I'd also formally withdraw my AOS petition. I'd file for divorce and find a place for her to stay until it is final. Florida is good! Then I'd drive her to the airport and kiss her goodbuye, for good.

The USC CANNOT withdraw the AOS application as the I-485 application is the alien's application. The only thing the USC can withdraw is the I-864 and can only be withdrawn before I-485 approval. The result would be the same, but just making sure that the request for the withdrawal is for the correct document

Edited July 10, 2010 by payxibka

[Nept21 0]

I want to thank everyone that has helped me in this matter. I can say that she is out of my home and that I am a lot less stressed at this time. She has started to call me and have been sending emails trying to work things out. She has shown me her true colors so why would i want to continue. I guess that she has realized that she had shown her colors way to soon and that she is still at the beginng of the AOS. I do not want to continue on with this relationship. I would hate to complete the AOS, and have her being nice to me for a few years to only then start abusing me or accusing me of anything again. I might look dumb, but im smarter than the average joe.

I want to THANK everyone again. God Bless.

[besaangel 18]

I want to thank everyone that has helped me in this matter. I can say that she is out of my home and that I am a lot less stressed at this time. She has started to call me and have been sending emails trying to work things out. She has shown me her true colors so why would i want to continue. I guess that she has realized that she had shown her colors way to soon and that she is still at the beginng of the AOS. I do not want to continue on with this relationship. I would hate to complete the AOS, and have her being nice to me for a few years to only then start abusing me or accusing me of anything again. I might look dumb, but im smarter than the average joe.

I want to THANK everyone again. God Bless.

Glad to hear the great news... That poor thing, she is gonna try every trick in the book to get back at you. But you stay strong and stand firm; let her know its just a lil too late.

All the best

[Nept21 0]

I want to inform everyone that I have been on the phone all morning with USCIS AND ICE. I have made a report of with the proper authorities and they have told me this is visa fraud. The AOS has not been recieved by the government yet so they informed me to cancell the CHECK which I did.

This morning she called me around 4am to tell me that I had raped her and that she is a victim. She also stated that I forced her to come to the USA and that it is my responsibility to take care of her no matter where she lives and that I am suppose to give her everything she wants. She said she was going to call immigration and tell them that I raped her. I can tell the someone has been feeding her some bad info but I wont say nothing to her. I have filed a restraining order on her and I have an appointment today to see a divorce attorney. She has stated to me that she will not DIVORCE me at all, and that she will refuse to sign any paper.

So it appears that the only thing I really need to do now is divorce her and continue on with my life. Im happy my check was not cashed and that her paper work had not been recieved yet. I guess I will be getting a RFE when the check does not go through and I will work so hard to make sure I reply to the RFE quickly

This might be my last post that I place on here until everything is complete. Some of you I might PM if i get stuck somewhere but please let me know if I become a bother.

Thank you to all that have given me advice on what to do.

I will stay strong and get through this. Its been hard becuase this has been my first marriage and I never thought it would be like this.

[TBoneTX 45,329]

We have faith in you, si man!

[JimVaPhuong 4,863]

I want to inform everyone that I have been on the phone all morning with USCIS AND ICE. I have made a report of with the proper authorities and they have told me this is visa fraud. The AOS has not been recieved by the government yet so they informed me to cancell the CHECK which I did.

This morning she called me around 4am to tell me that I had raped her and that she is a victim. She also stated that I forced her to come to the USA and that it is my responsibility to take care of her no matter where she lives and that I am suppose to give her everything she wants. She said she was going to call immigration and tell them that I raped her. I can tell the someone has been feeding her some bad info but I wont say nothing to her. I have filed a restraining order on her and I have an appointment today to see a divorce attorney. She has stated to me that she will not DIVORCE me at all, and that she will refuse to sign any paper.

So it appears that the only thing I really need to do now is divorce her and continue on with my life. Im happy my check was not cashed and that her paper work had not been recieved yet. I guess I will be getting a RFE when the check does not go through and I will work so hard to make sure I reply to the RFE quickly

This might be my last post that I place on here until everything is complete. Some of you I might PM if i get stuck somewhere but please let me know if I become a bother.

Thank you to all that have given me advice on what to do.

I will stay strong and get through this. Its been hard becuase this has been my first marriage and I never thought it would be like this.

She's telegraphing her punches. She's going to try to adjust status on her own using VAWA. Whoever is advising her has probably told her that this is her only remaining chance to get a green card without you. Since you've already taken the proper steps and notified US immigration authorities, it's very unlikely her plan will work, but that isn't going to stop her from continuing to try to collect evidence. This may get worse before it gets better.

BTW, you should respond to the RFE with a notice that you're withdrawing the affidavit of support, and are in the process of divorcing her.

[Deputy Purple 1,294]

I agree with Jim, heck ever since her first dare/request for you to hit her she has been working the VAWA angle.

I would say this knowledge makes it even more important for you to file charges against her for the previous attacks you've endured.

As a police officer I'm sure you know to never be alone with her again. I would further recommend that you stop answering her phone calls and insist on written communication from here on out.

Now you're first priority should be protecting yourself from potential false claims.

[Fandango 1,439]

You need to still file charges just to protect yourself and stay on the right side of the law. Good luck.