The Vent Part Quatre

[Kayleigh+Kyle 0]

I wish we could just up and leave this place like they did. Move to somewhere that has promise of a positive future.

Of course I'd need a job so we'd have 2 incomes to even attempt to pull such a thing off. It all comes right around to the fact that I don't have a GC.

What are you here on? I am on mobile so I can't see it on your profile.

[antda 13]

http://www.timescolonist.com/life/disowned+teen+sues+support/3130309/story.html

The above article states its s BC case. Not sure if other provinces have a similar law!!

Flames9_RN-Thanks for the info about the article and the case...

Wow, that is kind of scary that the parent can actually sue the adult child for support....

I hope that this is just an isolated incident and that there aren't any other extreme cases such as this.

And for this case...I also think that the adult child should counter-sue the parent, for abandoning them as minors...I wonder what kind of a life they led, and if they are somehow 'damaged' in some way because of the absentee parents like that...Sad really......

I hope too, that this is just a BC law and not a law anywhere else in Canada and in the world....That's scary..

See, here is my take on the issue...

The parents choose to have children...They should be responsible for them.......

But the children did not choose the parents....And as minors, the children did not have any say as to how the parents treat them (especially if they had abandoned/neglected them.)...So that doesn't give the right to the parents to sue for support afterwards, as the children were not responsible for the parents' bad parenting and had to endure extra hardships because of that bad parenting too....

If the children want to help their parents, out of their own free will, then that's fine...

But they should not be obligated and/or forced to, just because of some court ruling or some other legal issue....

Oh and one more thing....If you treat your kids well...They will want to help you out, out of their own free will...No need to get the courts involved...Just a thought....

Ant

i am absolutely livid at my apartment owners..

when we were looking at this apartment we were told 200$ deposit, then when we went to sign the lease we were told" oh those are the old rules, we have new management and you need a co signor since you make 300 less than we preper so now it is 350$ deposit." ok fine..we paid it. however the night we got the keys they didn't want to wait for the extra 100$ cheque to pass so they wanted a credit card payment asap, fine we did it. I went back in to the office on july 6th to say hey by the way you have a cheque you didn't cash..give me the money back. oh we can't do that but we will give you a credit, and then i find out our first month rent free was for us..not our pets..we had to pay the pet rent. so the 100$ credit became only 65$.

so i say well i want it written down on my lease we overpaid our security deposit. so they wrote the amount down dated and signed it. Fast forward to today, the new management is looking over every lease and the books and is now trying to tell me we owe them 100$ and that the security deposit is now 450$...umm say what?? and that we should not have deducted our august rent for the 65 over payment.

needless to say the correction to the lease makes it look like we agreed to an increased security deposit and they have edited their ledges now in august with a charge of an extra 100 and dated it july 1 ..which i'm pretty sure backdating something like that is illegal..but of course the usa doesn't effing believe in rental laws anywhere like quebec or ontario so now i'm up sh1te crick and have to cough up the damn money!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

Kimbear-Ouch..Sorry to hear that the management company of your apartment is messing up with your rent....

You shouldn't have to cough up that rental extra money!

Good thing too, that you kept everything in writing....

So in case you ever get into any further problems with them down the road, you can fight against that too...

It does sound fishy to me too, and you should consider filing a formal complaint against the company too....

And if it gets too bad, consider moving out (and getting all your security deposit back, in some way or other) too..

Really you shouldn't have to put up with this rental situation when you don't have to!

Ant

[antda 13]

I have a little vent. I guess. Maybe rather immature. I don't know. :\

I can't get out of the house; no public transit, no sidewalks, outside city limits, et cetera. As such, it's not like I've ever managed to make friends. What I have/had were "the spouses of my husband's friends, who I got along with, but could count the number of times I've seen them on 2 hands." One of these, I have seen maybe once or twice, and that was like 3 or 4 years ago. The other, it has been months. I would only see them if my husband wanted to hang out with his male friends, in which case I'd go with.

Now, the female friend (and her husband, whom I guess is a "friend" in the same "rarely-see-you-but-get-along-with" capacity) were from the west coast. They moved to the east coast (where I am). They've finally decided that this neck of the state utterly sucks and they are going back to their home state to be with their families and in an environment that doesn't suck. Now, I can't say I'm surprised they're leaving. I'm surprised they stayed as long as they have. I certainly, honestly, wish them both the best of luck. Female friend left yesterday (apparently) - never got to say bye to her or anything, but then again, I am sure I was just an acquaintance to her. Her husband is working his 2 weeks notice and is then also leaving.

My "friend" count is back to 0, excluding the one friend from Canada whom I still consider my best female friend as we got along like peas in a pod and still do even though our contact is sparse.

I wish we could just up and leave this place like they did. Move to somewhere that has promise of a positive future.

Of course I'd need a job so we'd have 2 incomes to even attempt to pull such a thing off. It all comes right around to the fact that I don't have a GC.

TickTock-Sorry to hear that you are having a difficult time finding friends and other acquaintances where you are...

This is especially difficult in a country/rural area, where it can feel as though there is a 'lack of civilization' out there in the woods, and it can be a quite journey to go to the city/town where 'civilized life' is...lol...

If it makes you feel any better, I totally understand how you are feeling too.....

I kind of have the same problem, being out here in the woods.......

So yeah, people are kind of 'far and few in between' around here too.....

But here's the thing...I've kind of learned that "distance shouldn't be a factor in friendships/relationships" and that "one can never find what they are looking for in life when they are looking for it"....

So if you have friends that are far away, that's ok too, as long as you keep in contact with them through any means (e-mail, phone, letters, etc...), then you can still maintain that friendship and still be friends with them...

And if you try and actively look for best friends, right away, chances are you won't find them soon. Rather, they will turn up unexpectedly and when you least expect them too...lol...

In the meantime, enjoy the many 'chance encounters' that you have in life, and maybe you can find friends that way too..

For example, are there any activities you are interested in? Maybe you can see if there are groups/organizations/clubs/etc. that have such in town, and consider joining that too, so as to get to know new people and make friends that way.

As well, are you interested in volunteering? Maybe you can do some volunteer work in your community, so that you can get to know new people and make friends that way too. As well, this can help you with work experience too, for when you do need a job further on down the road and eventually get your GC.....

Don't let the 'small town/country/rural life' stigma get you down...As I'm sure you can find things to do and people to meet, regardless. Actually, what's kind of funny is that small town people are friendlier than big city people...So you never know......

Hope this helps. Good luck in finding new friends/people, and good luck for the rest of your journey too..

Ant

[Sprailenes 47]

So on Sunday my brother-in-law had a going away party as he is moving to Hawaii to go to University. Some of my husbands dad's side came over, including his uncle from Delaware. His uncle has a farm and is always hiring South Americans and seems to think he is an expert on immigration. So I said something about how the process sucked and he looked at me and said: "Well what do you know about that?" Umm excuse me? I didn't just come into this country without going through a process. Then I told them about how my ROC was totally miserable and took about 7 months and he said: "Well all you would have needed was a good lawyer!" Again, totally untrue, but why argue with people?

A lawyer doesn't speed up the process or make it any easier. I look back now and I wish I would have said something more because he obviously thinks that because he hires people from South America to work on his farm and deals with immigration "all of the time" that he is some sort of expert on the subject of immigration in it's entirety.

Can I just say that I am so tired of people who have NO IDEA about family based immigration talking about it as if they did? I mean when I first got here, I couldn't work for 6 months and my husbands grandmother had it in her head that I was lying about not being allowed to work and deemed me as lazy. Still to this day she thinks that my husband had to push me to work and that's why I got a job. Not waiting for my EAD or anything like that... nope, I was lazy.

I feel like I should be walking around with a freaking manual on marriage based visas or something so people can just read up on their own because even if you tell them they just can't seem to wrap their heads around it. Yes it's that complicated! Yes it totally sucks! No, it's not as simple as getting married and becoming a citizen. Fack.

Edited August 12, 2010 by Sprailenes

[Marilyn. 340]

we had a lawyer and I think it made our process worse.. and it cost an arm and a leg

Edited August 12, 2010 by Marilyn.

[Penny Lane 8,159]

My first vent!

My story begins June 21st when I started this job, a casual position in the government for three months. I was due to get my first paycheck on July 7th, but due to some mixup (or someone just not doing their job), my paycheck was sent to a house that I have not lived in in over a year, even though payroll had all of my updated information. Why they sent a paycheck to a home address, I will never know. So I filled out a form on July 12th to have this check re-issued to me.

It is now August 12, a month later, and I still have not received it. I decided to contact my pay clerk last week, who tells me "It takes awhile, I can't look it up for you, I'm sorry." Unacceptable answer, but I wait another week. Today, I call her again and tell her I've waited too long for this, I'm tired of paying for someone else's mistake, and if she can't give me any answers as to where this check is and when I'm receiving it, I'd like to know who can help me. She tells me, once again, there's nothing she can do for me. I've waited, been more than patient, kept my frustrations to myself. But the longer it's gone on, the more angrier I've gotten. Nobody seems willing to help and here I am, paying for someone else's mistake. I'm behind on bills because I did not get a paycheck for the first MONTH of my employment here.

So I decide to contact her once more to ask for her supervisor's name. Well! This question alone makes her nervous and she tells me she'll call me back. I wait, just itching to hit "send" on the email I've drafted to her supervisor, when I get a phone call. It's my pay clerk! And she tells me they re-issued my check on July 15th (though a week ago, she had NO ACESS to this information whatsoever!) but she never received it. She has no idea where it is. But she'll have them issue another check today and I will hopefully get it next week.

Such a frustrating, drawn out situation all because someone didn't update a file somewhere in some system and they had my home address wrong. It's funny how people can't help you until you ask who's in charge of them.

Ok, I'm done, I think. Until next week, if I don't get my check..

[Tick Tock 3]

What are you here on? I am on mobile so I can't see it on your profile.

Overstay, came as a visitor. Have been unable to AOS.

TickTock-Sorry to hear that you are having a difficult time finding friends and other acquaintances where you are...

This is especially difficult in a country/rural area, where it can feel as though there is a 'lack of civilization' out there in the woods, and it can be a quite journey to go to the city/town where 'civilized life' is...lol...

If it makes you feel any better, I totally understand how you are feeling too.....

I kind of have the same problem, being out here in the woods.......

So yeah, people are kind of 'far and few in between' around here too.....

But here's the thing...I've kind of learned that "distance shouldn't be a factor in friendships/relationships" and that "one can never find what they are looking for in life when they are looking for it"....

So if you have friends that are far away, that's ok too, as long as you keep in contact with them through any means (e-mail, phone, letters, etc...), then you can still maintain that friendship and still be friends with them...

And if you try and actively look for best friends, right away, chances are you won't find them soon. Rather, they will turn up unexpectedly and when you least expect them too...lol...

In the meantime, enjoy the many 'chance encounters' that you have in life, and maybe you can find friends that way too..

For example, are there any activities you are interested in? Maybe you can see if there are groups/organizations/clubs/etc. that have such in town, and consider joining that too, so as to get to know new people and make friends that way.

As well, are you interested in volunteering? Maybe you can do some volunteer work in your community, so that you can get to know new people and make friends that way too. As well, this can help you with work experience too, for when you do need a job further on down the road and eventually get your GC.....

Don't let the 'small town/country/rural life' stigma get you down...As I'm sure you can find things to do and people to meet, regardless. Actually, what's kind of funny is that small town people are friendlier than big city people...So you never know......

Hope this helps. Good luck in finding new friends/people, and good luck for the rest of your journey too..

Ant

Ant, I know you're in a rural area too and I am hoping that you've had a far easier time (with more opportunities) to make friends than I've had.

With the "friend" I had who has moved back to west coast, we did not really keep in touch. We got along fine but didn't have too much in common, and I know she has/had a social circle on which I was at the very rim. I just got to run into her once in a while. I don't have her email and although I think she is on Facebook, I do not want to sign up on Facebook because in all honesty, I don't have anyone elsewhere to keep in touch with whom I can't contact by phone.

I did try looking to see if there were hobby clubs or anything that I hold interest in, but it turns out there are none. Any sort of thing I could see myself interested in occurs in 2 towns which both require driving between 20 and 30 minutes just to get into those towns, and then even more driving to actually find any such places were they to exist. Now, if I were a Baptist, I would have no trouble finding a crowd as there are SO many churches around here. Unfortunately, that subject is not one I hold interest in. :\ Any volunteer work I've heard of is either religion-related, or takes place in other towns/would require commuting.

I am sure small towns can be great, but placement or the ability/means to commute seems to help immensely. I can't say I'd want to be within "city limits" of the town I'm outside as depending on where you live, the air reeks most of the time due to a mill within the town. The "main street" area is victim too. They say it's possible to get used to the smell, but it's just so offensive. My friend from Canada (along with a no-longer friend) were heading to SC a few years back, driving. They actually spent a night in the town here to visit me along the way. They couldn't stop joking/complaining about the "town farting". It's not like they were exaggerating, either!

I think I just need to try not to think about these things as I really don't have control over them. You're a good person, Ant - thank you for your help.

@ Sprailenes

I am sorry to hear about that uncle thinking he was a "pro" on the matter of immigration. It certainly is not a cut and paste dry process. I hope you don't have to encounter that man again; I know I'd be frustrated just seeing him. It's amazing that many people think "once you're married to a citizen, you become one too!" My parents are stuck in the belief that I can visit Canada and come back to the US - as an overstay. They don't think I'll run into any trouble, even though there is a 10 year ban in my situation. Either they're just stubborn or they actually know there's a ban but want me to visit Canada anyways so I'll be stuck from returning to the US. I am actually leaning to the later because of other events that have transpired.

With all of the ins and outs of immigration, and from what I have been learning through VJ, my husband said I should go into immigration law when I get done with my papers. I told him I wouldn't want to be an immigration lawyer; the system is so screwed up and it's on the verge of being turned onto its head, it seems.

@ Coconuts

Welcome to venting! I am very sorry to hear about your paycheque situation not being rectified in a timely manner. I have heard of other situations of people working for the government (state level) having trouble with their cheques as well. It seems like the moment something comes up, you have to complain loudly. Otherwise, they just won't do anything at all. I hear too much about incompetent people slacking off in aspects that greatly affect the livelihoods of others.

I really hope you get your cheque soon - keep that email draft saved, just in case.

[Tick Tock 3]

Just to clarify my post directed @ Sprailenes, to avoid any more confusion.

I'm in the US. If I leave, I will be banned from re-entering the US for 10 years. This is because I am an overstay.

I am unable to edit my post as the time frame for editing has passed, it seems.

[Kimbear 53]

we had a lawyer and I think it made our process worse.. and it cost an arm and a leg

So true...cost us too much and so many errors and so many months of delays. and an NOID and RFE to boot..needless to say he was fired real quick.

[Kayleigh+Kyle 0]

So true...cost us too much and so many errors and so many months of delays. and an NOID and RFE to boot..needless to say he was fired real quick.

What is a NOID?

My vent is that at 12:10 this morning, my 80 year old grandpa passed away. </3

[Kimbear 53]

There are laws regarding tenants rights, they however are on the state level. Some counties and cities have further laws regarding this. From a cursory search, I found only a snipet of information. http://www.hud.gov/l...enantrights.cfm

I would not do that as it can do a lot more than just degrade your credit. It will show as a delinquent account on your credit report and they can submit it to a collection agency. Having that on your credit score will severely limit your choices when getting a new apartment or a mortgage.

Hubby is amazing. he went over to the office and got it all fixed. it took him like 5 minutes

if i had gone over..i woulda yelled screamed probably said names etc. i'm bad with stuff like this. i immedately get grr argh, and assume the person is a jerk purposely trying to screw me over. from now on i told david he is dealing with all the problems lol. he's just that good at it

[Kimbear 53]

@ tick tock:

i know how you feel about friends atm. i'm in the same boat. my friends from Canada dont talk to me let alone facebook with me anymore. And the girls i know here are my husbands friends wives, gf's etc. although we chat when we are out together, i always feel awkward. some of us have things in common, but i dunno, i just dont feel like i fit in, and i try and talk to them or message them and they just dont seem interested in hanging out. David says i'm not trying hard enough, but i'm not the type of person to keep at it and hound another if they show no interest in doing things.

This weekend will be another chance to meet and chat withbpeople. my sister in law is having a pot luck sunday so i'll be going over their, but they are older, and well lol they are her friends not mine but ehh i'll make the appearance and at least try to socialize, lest i get too used to these 4 walls i'm in. lol

Edited August 13, 2010 by Kimbear

[Nina~ 431]

What is a NOID?

NOID = Notice of Intent to Deny

[Tick Tock 3]

@ Kayleigh+Kyle

I offer you my sincerest condolences. I hope that your grandfather passed peacefully and that you have happy memories and the comfort of loved ones to support you.

@ Kimbear

Yes, it certainly sounds as if we're on the same boat, including going to outings and interacting with people whom are older and have their own social circles. It definitely feels to me like I am just making appearances and small talk most of the time. I am sure that we'd both feel better if we were to run into a person/people who share interests so that we feel as if we actually fit in.

Beyond that, I am glad your husband was able to straighten out the situation quickly!

[Kimbear 53]

What is a NOID?

My vent is that at 12:10 this morning, my 80 year old grandpa passed away. </3

OH my , I"m so sorry for your loss.

NOID = Notice of intent to Deny. usually it's a very bad thing to get. And it's to be taken very very seriously. my lawyer was lucky i only found out about it after we fired him and got a copy of our file from him..he never gave us a copy when he got it. simply told us it was a simple painless RFE...ya right...Never trusting a laywer again...

Edited August 13, 2010 by Kimbear