Moving to the U.S.

[incanada1234 0]

Hubby and I move to the U.S. in two weeks. We've known for 16 months that we're going to do this. We've been insanely excited. And now, just now - at literally this very moment - I feel like I'm having an anxiety attack over this. Why are we moving and leaving our jobs?? Why are we leaving his family, who I get along with and enjoy being around a lot more than my family?? Why are we starting over at the age of 25?? What if we don't find jobs?? How long will it take us to buy a house?? What if I end up killing my mom?? We're staying with her until we get a house, but I don't exactly get along with her for very long. I feel like I'm going to throw up. I want to cry and THEN throw up.

[w¡n9Nµ7 §£@¥€r 123]

Why are you moving to the US?

[wherezdabearz 0]

I think it's normal to feel this way. It's a HUGE change in both your lives and change is a scary thing. But it's also exciting - you're about to start a whole new life together .

Wishing you all the best in your adventure

Alison

[sbgwolf1 0]

If your with the one you love, I dont understand the need for relocation. Especially when you say that you have to leave your jobs..if you can live together there and are happy...why leave.

[chri'stina 190]

How long have you been in Canada now? I guess when you started the visa process you probably weren't as adjusted to living there. Now it probably just feels like home for you.

[w¡n9Nµ7 §£@¥€r 123]

Especially when you say that you have to leave your jobs..if you can live together there and are happy...why leave.

Exactly. So why are you moving?

[no name 1]

25 is hardly an old age to be starting over.

Many VJers are older than that & coming from a lot farther away than from Canada to be with their S.O. in a foreign land...

[w¡n9Nµ7 §£@¥€r 123]

Agreed, 25 is not old. But I still don't know why incanada is moving at all. If she has a job there and a life there, why move? I am sure there is a good reason but it's lost in the old deleted archives and I do not remember.

[wherezdabearz 0]

I think 25 is a great age to be starting over. IF you want to...

[Veiled Princess 1]

I want to know why move here too Canada rawks!

[no name 1]

I think 25 is a great age to be starting over. IF you want to...

Yeah, I went to grad school at 33! Talk about starting over...

[incanada1234 0]

Well, some of you may remember - we HATED Canada for a long time. Like, we literally hated living here, the liberal government, the socialist system, blah blah blah. Hubby's wanted to live in the U.S. since he was about 12 years old. I have a pretty good job but he wants to own his own business (a lot less taxes in the U.S.). I was a lot closer to my family when we were first married. We've lived here now for almost 4 years. My job doesn't really matter because quite frankly, I just want babies and to stay home with them. Hubby's the breadwinner, so we need to go where he'll be most successful.

The main problem is that we started the I-130 process 16 months ago and our thinking has changed since then. We don't hate Canada now, I'm not as close to my family anymore since it's been so long, we've grown up and admitted that maybe public healthcare isn't so bad (can't go bankrupt from having surgery, right?), I'm even CLOSER to HIS family; I adore them, his whole family - aunts, uncles, parents, siblings, EVERYONE. The thought of leaving them almost always has me in tears.

So good question - why ARE we moving now? Well 1) We still want to give the U.S. a shot. There are lots of job opportunities where we're moving, like a 2% unemployment rate. I have almost no doubt that we'll be successful and well-off. 2) We still love America and think it's the greatest country on earth. It just seems right that we live in the country we love. And 3) We've already told all my friends and family that we're moving. My mom's already prepared and excited for us to come. I've already given notice to my job (just last Friday actually). I mean, I can't just say, "Ok everyone, just kidding! We're staying now."

This SUCKS.

[w¡n9Nµ7 §£@¥€r 123]

Sounds like a bunch of bad reasons to move and one good reason. The good reason being that this is definitely a better place to own a business. Good luck with what you guys decide... just remember that plenty of Canadians own businesses in the US. You don't need to move here to take advantage of US tax laws, as far as I know.. if I'm wrong, someone will come along and correct me shortly.

[wherezdabearz 0]

Hmmm...sounds as though you need to think very carefully about this move. You don't HAVE to go if it's not right for you. In your original post it sounded to me like a case of nerves, but from your second post it sounds as though you really just don't want to go.

Sounds as though you may already be living in a country you love and that you're already doing OK financially. I wouldn't worry about disappointing friends and family (and presumably you'd be making the ones in Canada happy if you were staying). This is YOUR life and YOUR future. You might be able to withdraw your resignation. And if not, would you be worse off than jobhunting in the States?

There's no shame in changing your mind. What would make YOU happy?

[incanada1234 0]

I don't know what would make me happy. I used to know and now I'm not so sure. GREAT time to have this all come to my attention though.