Feminism to blame for girls gone wild

[KaiserD 12]

Still needing that facepalm smiley/emoticon....

[Peikko 1,575]

Clearly, you portray your wife as a personal slave on the internet for some personal satisfaction but what you wife is not is anti-feminism - perhaps anti-stereotypical portrayal of feminism derived from who knows where that has nothing to do with reality - but anti- feminist not at all. Thank goodness for that. Perhaps you should try to portray a more wholesome image of your wife in future?

[ValerieA 350]

Gary, I do agree with what you put in your post above, and that all fits in my definition of feminism. Oh, except for one thing - what is a man's job. I figure whoever is best suited to doing the job, should do it - certain things around the house (repairs and maintenance, etc.) need to be my domain. Hubby is exceptional, but he has an artistic mind and I have an accountant's mind - which is a way of saying I seem to be able to figure out how to do certain things that he could care less about. Could also be my farming background, while his is a city background - we had to fix our own stuff there.

ETA: I have done the walking miles (concrete, not cobblestones) in heels without complaining. There was a certain amount of internal ACK! going on though.

Edited June 2, 2010 by ValerieA

[Trompe le Monde 1,107]

She believes a man and woman in marriage should be dedicated to each other and do those things they are best equipped to do for their mates

All of us in successful marriages do this - just because we don't do it your way, doesn't mean we aren't as blissfully as happy as you seem to be.

But why do you need to insult the femininity/looks of other women here? You do it time and time again and its' really quite boorish

Edited June 2, 2010 by Trompe le Monde

[elmcitymaven 9,712]

Correct.

My wife is NOT a feminist. Not by any stretch of imagination. She is highly educated, very resourceful, fully capable of being successful on her own. She can cook, walk miles on cobblestones in heels and never complain and all that stuff that Empress describes.

She CHOOSES to be married to me and to live as a wife should (in our opinion) and takes great pleasure in pleasing her husband as I take pleasure in pleasing her. That she is capable of providing very well for herself is further evidence it is a CHOICE, not a neccessity to depend on a man. This makes it all the more satisfying to me, that she...

1. Made that choice

2. Continues to make that choice every day. I would b=never accepot it if she didnlt have the means to leave at any point, at any moment without notice. If she isn't free, it isn't a choice.

She believes, really, that men and women are fundemantally different and that women should not have to do a man's job, and vice versa. She believes a man and woman in marriage should be dedicated to each other and do those things they are best equipped to do for their mates. As a child of the Soviet Union she is aware of what she must be prepared and educated to do if need be. What you must do is not a choice. What you CHOOSE to do is what defines you as a feminist or not. Alla is fully CAPABLE of "being a feminist" she chooses not to be one.

Her beliefs and mine are closely meshed in this area...good thing, I married her.

Elm...you should be sending naked pics to your husband ON PURPOSE, what is there to be embarrased about? I thought you were sending it to strangers and were just a feminist floozie.

I don't think equality of the sexes means equality in every aspect of being -- it's biologically impossible. Would I want to be a man? Hell no. I like being a woman, thank you very much. No one here, NOT ONE, who has been posting in this thread who has identified herself as a feminist has said they espouse your farcical femininst manifesto. Not one. We all say: it is a woman's right to choose her own path. I am pleased your wife finds pleasure in being your partner. That is her path.

Feminism today is simply this: a woman's right to choose for herself what she does, when she does it and with whom. Guess it sucks for you that you married one.

And it was an oopsie because my husband and I are in the process of splitting up. Not due to anything I did, and he will be the first to tell you that. He still thinks I am the most brilliant, beautiful and talented creature he ever met.

[Empress of Groovy 373]

Correct.

My wife is NOT a feminist. Not by any stretch of imagination. She is highly educated, very resourceful, fully capable of being successful on her own. She can cook, walk miles on cobblestones in heels and never complain and all that stuff that Empress describes.

She CHOOSES to be married to me and to live as a wife should (in our opinion) and takes great pleasure in pleasing her husband as I take pleasure in pleasing her. That she is capable of providing very well for herself is further evidence it is a CHOICE, not a neccessity to depend on a man. This makes it all the more satisfying to me, that she...

1. Made that choice

2. Continues to make that choice every day. I would b=never accepot it if she didnlt have the means to leave at any point, at any moment without notice. If she isn't free, it isn't a choice.

She believes, really, that men and women are fundemantally different and that women should not have to do a man's job, and vice versa. She believes a man and woman in marriage should be dedicated to each other and do those things they are best equipped to do for their mates. As a child of the Soviet Union she is aware of what she must be prepared and educated to do if need be. What you must do is not a choice. What you CHOOSE to do is what defines you as a feminist or not. Alla is fully CAPABLE of "being a feminist" she chooses not to be one.

Her beliefs and mine are closely meshed in this area...good thing, I married her.

Elm...you should be sending naked pics to your husband ON PURPOSE, what is there to be embarrased about? I thought you were sending it to strangers and were just a feminist floozie.

I'm not sure what definition of feminism you're operating from, given that you haven't really clarified it, but it sounds like Alla is indeed a feminist. That makes you a feminist enabler.

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

I've been cogitating upon this further as I did the washing up and put lunch on. I think my major issue here is that Gary doesn't get that we are not foisting our choices onto his wife, but he sees fit to force his version of what it means to be a "real woman" onto us. If I were a misandrist, and I certainly am not, I would say that's classic male thinking: everyone has a choice as long as it's MY choice.

Not true. I have never disparaged you or how you choose to live. Find it if I did. My way of life and that of my wife has been ridiculed continuously in this thread, even to the point of ignoring the topic to ridicule Gary and Alla. I hope you are happy and your husband is happy, even your estranged husband, or how many ever husbands you have around and send nude photos to...none of my concern. I will post the words again if you like, or you can read them yourself. Every response to me (until this one) has been nothing but name-calling, ridicule and chastisement of myself and my wife. I have been credited with saying things I never did, called ignorant, and told I hate women. And all the time, ALL I said was "I am happy with my choices" In several posts I wished all you were happy also...so we will all be happy. But that seems niot acceptable, I have to be happy under the feminists terms, not my own. I think it makes them even more angry that Alla IS capable of being self sufficient. She is not a poor girl from a village without indoor plumbing and no education. She has three masters degrees and chooses ME for her husband. I'm flattered. We are called "ignorant" because it really looks bad that we aren't ignorant. Better that everyone THINK we are ignorant and "that is why"

I have never said anything other than feminism is not attractive to me and I avoid it, so what's the problem? I never try to force my happiness on anyone. It is all fun and games if you send nude photos (sexting) to your husband, but it is somehow terrible if I say waking up next to Alla naked assures I will have a good day. WHAT???? How is enjoying that level of intimacy with my WIFE a bad thing? How is it that my marriage makes for a great day for me every day is a BAD thing?

I am not ashamed that my marriage is the highlight of my life, it is the purpose in my life, that I think my wife is beautiful and clever and I am the luckiest guy in the world. ####### is the problem?

Consider, just for a moment, the OPPOSITE of all I say about Alla and tell me if that would sound better?

I'm not sure what definition of feminism you're operating from, given that you haven't really clarified it, but it sounds like Alla is indeed a feminist. That makes you a feminist enabler.

Whatever definition makes YOU feel better is fine with me. If you will sleep better tonight in the thought that Alla is a feminist, I am happy for you. Sweet dreams.

[ValerieA 350]

Not true. I have never disparaged you or how you choose to live. Find it if I did. My way of life and that of my wife has been ridiculed continuously in this thread, even to the point of ignoring the topic to ridicule Gary and Alla. I hope you are happy and your husband is happy, even your estranged husband, or how many ever husbands you have around and send nude photos to...none of my concern. I will post the words again if you like, or you can read them yourself. Every response to me (until this one) has been nothing but name-calling, ridicule and chastisement of myself and my wife. I have been credited with saying things I never did, called ignorant, and told I hate women. And all the time, ALL I said was "I am happy with my choices" In several posts I wished all you were happy also...so we will all be happy. But that seems niot acceptable, I have to be happy under the feminists terms, not my own. I think it makes them even more angry that Alla IS capable of being self sufficient. She is not a poor girl from a village without indoor plumbing and no education. She has three masters degrees and chooses ME for her husband. I'm flattered. We are called "ignorant" because it really looks bad that we aren't ignorant. Better that everyone THINK we are ignorant and "that is why"

I have never said anything other than feminism is not attractive to me and I avoid it, so what's the problem? I never try to force my happiness on anyone. It is all fun and games if you send nude photos (sexting) to your husband, but it is somehow terrible if I say waking up next to Alla naked assures I will have a good day. WHAT???? How is enjoying that level of intimacy with my WIFE a bad thing? How is it that my marriage makes for a great day for me every day is a BAD thing?

I am not ashamed that my marriage is the highlight of my life, it is the purpose in my life, that I think my wife is beautiful and clever and I am the luckiest guy in the world. ####### is the problem?

Consider, just for a moment, the OPPOSITE of all I say about Alla and tell me if that would sound better?

Whatever definition makes YOU feel better is fine with me. If you will sleep better tonight in the thought that Alla is a feminist, I am happy for you. Sweet dreams.

Gary, if I have ridiculed you, called you names, disparaged you, I am truly sorry, I did not intend to. I am happy for you, that you have found the woman who makes you happy. I was trying to point out that you and I do have some of the same world view, and we just use opposite words to name it.

I don't think anyone said it was terrible that having Alla means that you will have a good day, I think that is awesome, and I think the same about my husband, as he does about me. I think you have a wonderful marriage, and that it is right for you and your wife. I didn't think there was a bunch of hate spewing in this thread, to be honest, I thought that for once, we were managing to have a reasonable debate without a lot of the normal name-calling and bs that goes on. I will have to re-read, I think I missed something somewhere.

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

Great. Now we all agree. Alla is a feminist. By NOT being a feminist she IS a feminist because it is her choice NOT to be a feminist, which makes her a feminist by indirect, rather than direct, choice. Whatever. I am happy, you are happy, we are all happy. No doubt all the name calling and ridcule was because of my inability to admit my wife is really a feminist after all.

I need to lie down. After I have a sandwich. Sheeesh.

[elmcitymaven 9,712]

Le wow. How many times do I have to say it: I AM HAPPY FOR BOTH OF YOU.

Maybe people are jumping on YOU and not me because I don't have a reputation for being a misogynistic bully, whether or not your reputation is deserved. Your snark detector is set permanently to off -- you seem unable to discriminate between lighthearted banter (sexts) and more serious discussion (the nature of feminism). You have cast aspersion on my body. You treat the women who have come in here and tried to explain their issues with your view of feminism and femininity with disdain.

Just some bubbleheaded, female thoughts from me. Disregard them; they aren't up to your level of discourse.

[ValerieA 350]

Great. Now we all agree. Alla is a feminist. By NOT being a feminist she IS a feminist because it is her choice NOT to be a feminist, which makes her a feminist by indirect, rather than direct, choice. Whatever. I am happy, you are happy, we are all happy. No doubt all the name calling and ridcule was because of my inability to admit my wife is really a feminist after all.

I need to lie down. After I have a sandwich. Sheeesh.

Don't forget the mayonnaise!

[Empress of Groovy 373]

Whatever definition makes YOU feel better is fine with me. If you will sleep better tonight in the thought that Alla is a feminist, I am happy for you. Sweet dreams.

That's a weird response, Gary.

It's clear that you have no idea what feminism is, or means. If you did, you wouldn't be imagining that everyone's against you, ridiculing you, and begrudging you and your wife your happiness, compatibility, and real mayo.

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

Threatened? Hardly. It's more a matter of being mystified by the ignorance of someone who can have such a weak grasp of human rights and equality. You know, two of the cornerstones that this nation was founded upon. You have the freedom and right to associate and enter into marriage with whomever you chose. That doesn't mollify your ignorance one bit.

Here is one you missed Valerie. There are many more.

That's a weird response, Gary.

It's clear that you have no idea what feminism is, or means. If you did, you wouldn't be imagining that everyone's against you, ridiculing you, and begrudging you and your wife your happiness, compatibility, and real mayo.

I like real Mayo. I never complained about real Mayo.

[Empress of Groovy 373]

Here is one you missed Valerie. There are many more.

I like real Mayo. I never complained about real Mayo.

I meant that no one is begrudging you your real mayo.

[Peikko 1,575]

What is 'unreal' mayonnaise anyway?