Sex-Ed University: Be More Careful In The Bedroom!

[IR5FORMUMSIE 850]

in texas, we learn to get our own beer.

In Texas women should be seen and not heard, besides, this aint' Texas, this is Kansas, Dorothy. I don't care if you need Auntie Em to give you a hand, GET MY DAMN BEER!!!!

Edited May 16, 2010 by IR5FORMUMSIE

[Ban Hammer 13,334]

In Texas women should be seen and not heard, besides, this aint' Texas, this is Kansas, Dorothy. I don't care if you need Auntie Em to give you a hand, GET MY DAMN BEER!!!!

i didn't know i had a sex change.

[IR5FORMUMSIE 850]

i didn't know i had a sex change.

No wonder you couldn't get pregnant, you don't have the factory installed equipment. I always figured that I was going up a blind alley, but I was too hammered to realize it. I'm almost sober nad I don't care if you are trans-testical, just get me my beer.

Edited May 16, 2010 by IR5FORMUMSIE

[Nagishkaw 510]

Charles, just get 5 his beer and be done with it.

[Ban Hammer 13,334]

Charles, just get 5 his beer and be done with it.

don't have any beer around here.

[IR5FORMUMSIE 850]

don't have any beer around here.

Then go out and get some, woman! *hurls a beer bottle at Charles' Mary's head missing by a mile and hitting the phone on the wall instead*

[Ban Hammer 13,334]

Then go out and get some, woman! *hurls a beer bottle at Charles' Mary's head missing by a mile and hitting the phone on the wall instead*

maybe you should see a shrink about those issues of yours - needing beer, anger problems, unable to tell male from female.

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

These things can get really dangerous. When my brother was doing his residency in emergency medicine he reported a case of a guy that came in with a light bulb lodged up his bum. One of those long slender ones, like in an aquarium. My brother DID NOT ASK, he insists, but the guy says he was taking a shower and slipped and fell..and OOPS! The aquarium light bulb went right up his bum! It can happen.

[IR5FORMUMSIE 850]

maybe you should see a shrink about those issues of yours - needing beer, anger problems, unable to tell male from female.

You use your tongue better than a $1,000 #######, now get my damn beer, already. *hurls another empty bottle across the room missing Charles Mary again and hitting their wedding picture*

[ValerieA 350]

In Texas women should be seen and not heard, besides, this aint' Texas, this is Kansas, Dorothy. I don't care if you need Auntie Em to give you a hand, GET MY DAMN BEER!!!!

Cinco...

Did you think I would not read this thread?

Charles, while you are getting his beer, could you be a sweetie and grab me one too? Kthxbai.

[Ban Hammer 13,334]

Cinco...

Did you think I would not read this thread?

Charles, while you are getting his beer, could you be a sweetie and grab me one too? Kthxbai.

i'll get you one, because you're nicer.

[ValerieA 350]

i'll get you one, because you're nicer.

Really? Apparently I have the VJers fooled...

[IR5FORMUMSIE 850]

Cinco...

Did you think I would not read this thread?

Charles, while you are getting his beer, could you be a sweetie and grab me one too? Kthxbai.

Firstly, let me say that I am not drunk. I don't care what the machine says I'm not implored...ummm...impured...ahhh...drunk. The Ossifer said to blow into something but I'm not gay so they arrested me. Secondly, a giant penguin who can't spell is hitting me on the head with a hammer. I only get hit by pink elephants or my ex-wives when I'm drunk. Fourthly, just because you get married to a woman who look like a man, that doesn't make you gay, does it? Fifthly, I know women can read and remember everything. My two ex-wives and their lawyers taught me that. I had a jacuzzi but now I just have to fart in the tub. Seventhly, I support wim..fem...broads. I used to give them a few bucks each week and I'd tuck it to their g-strings so it wouldn't fall out. Seventhly, I'm hot, so very hot that I have to take off my pants. Sorry, I forgot to wear my underwear, I know it's small but my ex-wives got half of EVERYTHING. Eighthly, George Jetson used to work for Eightly Sprockets.

In conclusion, your honor, I'm just going to stay here a while, now here's $100 get yourself some pancake and a pretty bra.

-

[IR5FORMUMSIE 850]

i'll get you one, because you're nicer.

It's true that I'm not nice. When I spend two weeks salary that you earn working triple shifts on a diamond necklace as a surprise anniversary present because the wife has her heart set on it, I'm not nice. When the wife comes home after working and says she's tired and you draw a bath and massage her feet eventhough you have just finished working back-to-back shifts, I'm not nice. When the wife tells you that she's got nothing nice to wear and you max out your credit cards just to keep her happy, I'm not nice. When the wife forgets to make you lunch and you wake up at 5:30 so you can leave by 6:30 and you don't wake her up or complain about it even if go without because you're flat broke and you're trying to save up for a house that she has fallen in love with, I'm not nice. When the wife takes your new car and she loans it to her friend who causes $5000 damage which you have to pay out of pocket and your insurance premiums triple but you don't get upset about it, I'm not nice. See what a monster that I am, I'm not nice at all.

[IR5FORMUMSIE 850]

Really? Apparently I have the VJers fooled...

Not me. You're the type that rips out a man's heart, stomps on it, slices it, fries it and serves it up on your finest china while smiling sweetly and innocently asking, "would you like some pepper with that?"