Irritating BS your SO does

[VanessaTony 3,567]

Thanks, Vanessa It seems you can only edit your post for a certain period of time after posting it, I'll bear that in mind in future!

Yep. You have 5 minutes

[Kathryn41 3,205]

Post removed at the original posters request

[Gemmie 142]

I must be going mad, because I haven't said or done anything that anyone else hasn't said. What about the woman complaining about her husband's 'saliva pools?' Oh how dare she violate their sanctity of marriage by belittling him in a public forum!

it sounds so funny when you put it like that.

Seriously though, I don't think it's belittling him to talk about his annoying habits. He won't be upset that I told you all that. And I wouldn't be upset if he were to post about my soaking the bathroom floor or my habit of picking my lips. They're just little perks. I think the difference comes when it's an attack on a serious issue (like going against a mutual decision and potentially wasting hundreds of dollars) because that's something that genuinely made you angry, and also comes off as insulting her intelligence ("She completely failed. Honestly I just can't imagine what she was thinking, if she was even thinking at all"). I know that I would be upset if I were to read that from my husband.

Anyway the issue is over now, this is supposed to be a light-hearted topic.

[Rob and Jill 82]

Jeez, lighten up!

I am a pretty lighthearted person.

My point was after watching how considerate Scott is of his wife, I am TRYING to do the same for Rob. I want to try and emulate that more for Rob and myself because I think it is a healthier and happier thing to do! I feel lucky to have found him and am doing all I can to be thankful for it. I make mistakes, and I am not perfect about NOT talking about things involving him, but I am trying to be better.

It would also seem I am not the only person on the thread with the opinion that we should be careful about what we say. It also means I am NOT judging what others do, but that is how I chose to answer the thread.

Edited May 6, 2010 by Rob and Jill

[MelissaJulian 30]

Once again, hi. Melissa here. I just want to make it clear that Julian and I love each other very much and we are very aware of each other's shortcomings. He's right -- I do tend to change my mind a lot, even when I have said I will definitely do something one way, I often change it at the last moment! I am trying to be less selfish about these things and learn how to take his opinion about things into account as much as my own. When he makes up his mind, nothing's going to change it, but I am exactly the opposite. This is why I can never go to dinner at the Cheesecake Factory -- too many choices!

It's nice that everyone is concerned about us, but well, Julian is just being himself in this thread. Sometimes he rubs people the wrong way because he is very direct. I don't see it so much as him attacking me but as he says, more blowing off steam. When I need to, I tend to do so elsewhere in my diary or in my blog. I'm actually really touched that he is so concerned about my safety, and I didn't really understand that until we talked last night. I also understand that this is a really big purchase, and that he's worried that I'll do the same for other big purchases in the future.

And whoever said that thing about barefoot and pregnant... well, today's been so tough at work I think I wouldn't mind trading it all in for that!

[Rito 28]

Anyway the issue is over now, this is supposed to be a light-hearted topic.

Aw man, I have one. My fiance gets these muscle spasms when he sleeps, left over from a childhood illness. This wouldn't be such a big deal, but he's a big guy - 5'4'', and fairly muscular. That means that when he spasms, he sometimes literally punches and hits me when we sleep together. He feels bad about it, but what do you do? He says I steal sheets though, so maybe we're even.

Also he spells words with extra u's. What's with that?

[Jewel-8 21]

Aw man, I have one. My fiance gets these muscle spasms when he sleeps, left over from a childhood illness. This wouldn't be such a big deal, but he's a big guy - 5'4'', and fairly muscular. That means that when he spasms, he sometimes literally punches and hits me when we sleep together. He feels bad about it, but what do you do? He says I steal sheets though, so maybe we're even.

Also he spells words with extra u's. What's with that?

[DisneyLovers 18]

before anyone says I'm mean or unthoughtful for sharing our bad habits.. Paul and I openly discuss what irks each other about our bad habits, He's open at telling people he hum's whilst he eats if he's liking the food, so even when it irritates me, at least I know he's liked what I've cooked. And I'm sure my food pickiness annoys him sometimes, like when he wants something like pizza but I really have to be in a pizza mood to want any, too much too often doesn't sit well with me, and I go off certain foods and go back to liking them in random orders. Anyway I'd never post here anything that I wouldn't first share with him and only lighthearted stuff..

Like our driving practice.. or should I say, Paul pulls into TRW's parking lot, gets out ushers me to the driving seat and refuses to get in and stands in the middle of the empty parking lot letting me drive around and practice parking, whilst I thought at first it was annoying that he wouldn't sit in the car with me, he shared with me later that he was worried he'd get all "backseat driver-like" with me and didn't want to upset me... I think he is under the impression I drive like my Mum and her bat out of hell style of driving (She is a good driver but likes to not go at a snails pace and she is a recovering road-rager lol). Anyway I think we decided that once we've gone on our honeymoon later this month, that we'll look into refresher courses for driving just to get me used to automatic transmission and being on wat feels like the wrong side of the road.

[MelissaJulian 30]

Well, now that Julian's gone to bed, I can share my irritating BS that he does.

I hate when he can't admit that I'm right about something, even when there is plenty of evidence that I am. When that happens, instead of saying "OK, I'm wrong" or "You were right" he will either grunt or continue to argue his point, using the most subtle gradations until it looks like he was the one who was making the right point all along! It drives me nuts!

Also, I don't think his socks have ever met a hamper they DID like.

[Justine+David 218]

okay...here's a pet peeve...

David's very much into the environment and I consider myself to be fairly into it as well...but from the view point as an American, which apparently means hardly anything.

When I lived in D.C. itself I rode my bike to work every day (about 2-3 miles) and I recycle paper, plastics, cans, and glass.

Eventually, I moved outside of D.C. to Alexandria to get some more affordable housing + nicer place to live. I tried to take the metro to work (1 mile walk, 40 minutes on metro, 1 mile walk to work--couldn't bring bike on because it was rush hour) for about a month, but couldn't do it especially because I work 12 hour shifts and am exhausted by the end of the shift.

So...I get a car for the first time and while David said he doesn't want me to be too uncomfortable, he was clearly a bit disappointed in the prospect. And he wants to walk everywhere, like to the grocery store once a week instead of buying food for a month like I do. Never mind that all of my co-workers thought I was nuts for riding a bike to work and the idea of not having a car was a foreign concept to them...

We had a fair few arguments about getting a car initially and about the environment and I finally said, "Look! I'm the radical of the radicals for having ridden my bike for so long! Do you know how odd that is here?!" And then I think he finally got it that I had been sacrificing a lot--for an American

He was also extremely disappointed that there was no public option for healthcare reform before I told him, "Hey now, there is no snow ball chance in hell that public option would ever get passed...we need baby steps, dear the point is that we're moving in the right direction." He gets frustrated with American politics and the liberals being accused of being commies/socialists when he sees the Democrats being too conservative on most points compared to Europe...

[Nich-Nick 3,354]

I must be going mad, because I haven't said or done anything that anyone else hasn't said.

Here's the deal----You come across as a braggart in your posts here and elsewhere. I find it off-putting, perhaps others have too, and that's why you got grief from the gals. You could have easily said "we agreed on a sedan and she got talked into a sports car." Sounding like a pompous ####### will not win you many friends, not that you're looking for friends or supporters of your posts.

And to save Muffin some time:

Jeez, lighten up!

Peace, Love, and Porsches!

Mama Nich xxxx

[Gemmie 142]

I agree with David, Justine... I was shocked when I came here to find that everything except for water bottles goes straight into the trash. It killed me to throw empty bottles and cardboard packaging into there, but I was told that's how it is over here - they recycle certain things but more often than not... not. When I lived in the UK, the council gave us boxes to separate our stuff into, and we HAD to fill it every week. What you described is very good for an American. I hate the huge cars and 4x4s being driven by small families - and how everyone seems to keep their electricity running no matter what. I was always being told to turn lights off, switch things off, etc in the UK. I dunno, that might not be a 'country difference'.

I think Bill also gets annoyed with me when I talk about the politics over here. I never realised how "conservative' America is. I assumed that if you're more liberal, you'll be the equivalent of our liberal, but I'm always hearing from Americans that those laws are socialist and never work, and are unfair, etc. I try to sit there quietly with a smile, but really sometimes I want to just tell them to move onto the 21st century.

When I first came over, I was horrified at how much Americans use the microwave... cereal, baked potatoes, soup, TEA??

[JulianMelissa 52]

Here's the deal----You come across as a braggart in your posts here and elsewhere. I find it off-putting, perhaps others have too, and that's why you got grief from the gals. You could have easily said "we agreed on a sedan and she got talked into a sports car." Sounding like a pompous ####### will not win you many friends, not that you're looking for friends or supporters of your posts.

Contrary to your opinion, Melissa and I do come her for 'supporters.' We thought we'd found a place where we could share experiences with others who are going through a similar situation. I'm happy to say that, except for a few like yourself and Jules, we've found many supporters.

And just so I understand: your objection is that I mentioned the make and model of the cars, which reveals a little about my financial means, is this correct? Would it have been more acceptable for me to lie and say we were looking at a Kia but she bought a Hundai? Or maybe that would have made me anti-American, so I probably should have said we decided on the Ford pickup but she chose the Chevrolet pickup without the gun holder on the rear, hmm?

I happen to be in a position to pamper my fiancee a bit, and I've yet to hear her take issue. Perhaps you or your husband are one of the millions of Americans unable to hold a job in this terrible economy, and for that I am sympathetic. But I will not lie because my financial situation makes you uncomfortable. Indeed, I would be a 'pompous #######' to insist, as you have done, that people pretend to be who they are not.

[*julez* 124]

Rhymes with banker.

[Trompe le Monde 1,107]

Rhymes with banker.

thanker? canker?